More Secular Scientists Believing in Bigfoot (but not the Bible!!!)
One of the biggest mistakes secular scientists make is drawing natural conclusions first instead of jumping right to the supernatural conclusions like God-inspired Creation Scientists do. As Christians, we are careful to notice the signs of the times as Jesus commanded (Matt. 16:3), which means we are always on the lookout for the hidden meanings that a modern world will miss (I Cor. 2:7).
A new group meeting in Dallas recently declared that Bigfoot is likely real. They think that this lumbering creature, like a bigger, upright-walking ape, is somehow hiding from us in the woods. Of course, it is "spotted" in video clips here and there on the internet, but no real proof anywhere. Dating back to the early 1990s, the Landover Baptist Commission first publically stated its position concerning Bigfoot, which hasn't changed (I quote Pastor Deacon Rylie Simmons): "This whole thing may be a bunch of whoopla. "Bigfoot" may simply be a tall, unkempt, out-of-work negro basketball player walking around in remote places. If this isn't the case, it is some kind of demon or perhaps a demon/ape hybrid. We don't know for sure, just as we don't even know that it exists." And yet secular scientists have no problems accepting this silly myth and bringing it into the public eye instead of God and Jesus. The Bible is the King of fantastic claims and the MOST fascinating reading ever. It has literally shaped our world. Why no Balaam's ass or satan in the Garden of Eden in talking snake form evidence? Because Satan controls this world, and he always minimizes what God maximizes (and maximizes what God minimizes). Behold the latest nonsense... Quote:
Pastor Ed |
Re: More Secular Scientists Believing in Bigfoot (but not the Bible!!!)
Before we get all carried away with this, there are probably some more likely explanations. It's entirely possible that these Sasquatch are the feral offspring of hippies from the 1960's that went off into the wilderness to live in communes. Being under the influence of LSD, they likely fornicated with any number of beasts (and those hippie women already had vast amounts of hair on them to begin with). Many of them were communist radicals and friends of Obama's pal Bill Ayers and members of the SDS and Weather Underground terrorist organizations.
The real question here is what to do with them. It would be interesting to see if they could be trained to pick lettuce or do some common landscape maintenance. Look for the Democrats and their community organizers to declare them natural born citizens and victims of racial prejudice, register them to vote, give them drivers licenses, organize unions, sign them up for EBT cards and ObamaCare, grant them vast land holdings for reservations, and set them up to run casinos and sell cigarettes. The only positive thing that can be said here is that by all indications these Big Foot / Sasquatch seem to like to stay pretty much to themselves, are not interested in Big Government, and likely would vote Republican. Quote:
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Re: More Secular Scientists Believing in Bigfoot (but not the Bible!!!)
My father (Pastor Lamentations Flint) used to like to say "Hippies are living proof that nigras piffle dogs." So your idea that the Bigfoot is the ungodly offspring of hippies and (wetbacks?) something has great merit.
I thank :jesus-fancy: that He made me a Godly White man. :pray: |
Re: More Secular Scientists Believing in Bigfoot (but not the Bible!!!)
I had it tough trying to come up with a suitable rhyme
but to my knowledge no one has ever seen Nancy Pelosi and Big Foot at the same time. :harp: |
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