What the Bible says about free market capitalism (Or: Intelligent Design Economics 101)
 

Intelligent Design Economics 101

Intelligent Design, when applied to biology, teaches us that nature's bounty is not the result of an ungoverned system in which successful traits spread, and unsucessful ones are limited to a small niche or die out. Intelligent Design proves that nature is a command economy - orders come down from the top, with God and his bureau of angels telling every frog how many eggs to lay, and which plant to whither and die. It's not perfect - there are still deserts, and misquitos seem to be a boondoggle, but God and his government of angels obviously make better judgements than any system can. After all, if the evolutionary system did a better job of running nature, God would have invented it and put it to use.

So, Lessez-Faire is not God's policy. He could have enacted the free-mutation system that Darwinists imagine, unleashing each species to adapt to it's enviroment, with competition selecting the faster runner, the stronger swimmer, the most efficient size of tooth, or whatever. God, in His infinite wisdom, chose not to. Because when God's will is being obeyed, command economies are better.

At this point one might argue that free markets (economic evolutionism) already follow the commands of God. If this were true, then Hollywood, Boston, and San Fransico would not be so rich and the Red States would not be so poor. If economic evolutionism is true, then why does every day bring us new millionaires popping up in Silicon Valley, and new inventions and discoveries flowing from America's universities, those hives of liberalism? And at the same time Real America™ seems to be propped up only by social security cheques, with our only remaining industry being meth labs. Clearly God is in charge of the parts of the economy that keep Repiblicans rich, but someone else's invisible hand is at work producing wealth where Democrats are. Obviously that pariticular invisible hand belongs to Satan. Thus, to wrest control of the economy away from Satan's invisible claw, we need an Intelligently Designed Command Economy.

Communism failed for two reasons: firstly, because their commands come from Moscow, or Peking, or Havana etc. If a command economy takes it's commands from the Bible, and from the answered prayers of God's Chosen Elect, things would be completely different. Also, in Communism, the economy is commanded by the government. In a Christian Intelligently Designed Economy (CIDE), the economy would be a privately owned corporation.

So, to create CIDE, first we need to merge all businesses, including the government, into one corporation. AmeriChrist Corporation has already worked out the details. The CEO will be Pastor Decon Fred. Then every organization, from the Pentagon to your daughter's lemonade stand will follow the intelligent design of God.

Re: Intelligent Design Economics 101
 

Your one central corporation is the boldest idea I have ever heard Jeb to restore the Freemarket! We need to stop Socialism NOW! We don't need some central authority to tell us how it is done!

Re: Intelligent Design Economics 101
 

Brilliant idea, Brother. As an added benefit, CIDE will keep Obama's big-government socialist hands off of decent people's Medicare, Social Security, and veterans' benefits.

Re: Intelligent Design Economics 101
 

I like it because, along with its freedom to follow the will of God, tithes would be payroll deductions, at least those for LBC.

Re: Intelligent Design Economics 101
 

Intelligent design? This is GENIUS design.

P.S. remember me when you're hiring. I'm willing to start in the mailroom. Just make sure the mailroom has a corner office, okay? Thanks!

Re: Intelligent Design Economics 101
 

This is Godly design - praise Jesus! :up::biglol:

Re: Intelligent Design Economics 101
 

God's opinion on free-market competition is made obvious by how He talks about other religions. If God was in favor of competition, He would say "sure, give those competing religions a test-drive, you'll see their product doesn't match Christianity in price and quality! PS, thanks heathens! Without competing religions to keep Me on My toes, I might have gotten sloppy in My work."

However, God clearly states that monopolies are the best way to do business. Here's His take on competition:

Deuteronomy 13:6-10

If thy brother, the son of thy mother, or thy son, or thy daughter, or the wife of thy bosom, or thy friend, which is as thine own soul, entice thee secretly, saying, Let us go and serve other gods, which thou hast not known, thou, nor thy fathers; Namely, of the gods of the people which are round about you, nigh unto thee, or far off from thee, from the one end of the earth even unto the other end of the earth; Thou shalt not consent unto him, nor hearken unto him; neither shall thine eye pity him, neither shalt thou spare, neither shalt thou conceal him: But thou shalt surely kill him; thine hand shall be first upon him to put him to death, and afterwards the hand of all the people. And thou shalt stone him with stones, that he die.

Got that? If your child expresses an interest in any other religion, stone them to death - and make sure you cast the first stone. If your brother expresses an interest in any other religion, stone them to death - and make sure you cast the first stone. Etc. God does NOT believe in shopping around, or that "the customer is always right".

2 Chronicles 15:13
Whosoever would not seek the LORD God of Israel should be put to death, whether small or great, whether man or woman.

Hell is not for bad behaviour. Hell is for people who buy the competing product:

Mark 16:16
He that believeth and is baptized shall be saved; but he that believeth not shall be damned.

Pretty straightforward sales pitch: Buy or die, and be tortured for eternity. Hear your kids talking about "the other leading brand"? Stone 'em.

Clearly the Bible tells us that command economies work when the commands are the 10 commandments.

Re: Intelligent Design Economics 101
 

You into Blondes, brunettes, or redheads? You might as well have a secretary, while you're dreaming.

Re: What the Bible says about free market capitalism (Or: Intelligent Design Economics 101)
 

A guide to help you picture your place in the new economy:


https://i.redd.it/q6nx0p0p4yv91.jpg

Re: What the Bible says about free market capitalism (Or: Intelligent Design Economics 101)
 

I think I can see Brother Harvey's corner office (just follow the arrow). :D

Seriously though, the diagram in the shape of a triangle (representing a path towards enlightenment or connection to an omnipresent being) is a roadmap for hard workers to achieve their dreams of being leaders, corporate executives, Nazi officials, psychiatrists; or as our friend David Icke might say, the Reptilian Elite.

Re: What the Bible says about free market capitalism (Or: Intelligent Design Economics 101)
 

I was interested in the .2% category: Elected Officials.

Many corporate states do not have elections. They'll translate words from their own languages to mean something similar but the concept simply doesn't exist in their culture and they don't have a word for it at all. Where would these fit in?

Re: What the Bible says about free market capitalism (Or: Intelligent Design Economics 101)
 

Same place they are currently, under "Top Professionals"

"Doctors, ENTERTAINERS," etc.

Re: What the Bible says about free market capitalism (Or: Intelligent Design Economics 101)
 

A lesson that keeps needing to be taught in IDE 101 is that anyone who sells their services - including "professionals" - exists in a competitive market.

Job creators want only the most hardcore workers that will put up with long hours at high intensity in return for scraps. If you go the extra distance and pick 15 crates of turnips, for example, then maybe you will get a turnip for your supper. If not, HOW are you going to to eat? Turnips don't pick themselves! Lazy!

Owners have high standards. Businesses must increase profits. It's cut-throat.