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-   -   PROOF: British study shows that floods are caused by gaysexual marriage!! (https://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=97022)

Alphonse Alban 02-19-2014 05:11 AM

PROOF: British study shows that floods are caused by gaysexual marriage!!
 
As we know God has started to drown Godless Brits because of their God mocking limey ways. Some of the more rational and God-fearing residents of that Godless island have however still some sense in their head. They have discovered that recent flooding is a direct consequence of legalizing the gaysexual marriage.


Quote:

How same-sex marriage causes floods

A UKIP councillor recently caused controversy by saying gay marriage was responsible for the severe UK floods. However, scientific analysis reveals that he may have been more correct than most people think


UKIP councillor David Silvester recently caused controversy when he said the recent serious floods in the UK were the direct result of the legalisation of gay marriage, resulting in his suspension from the party. It is easy to assume that his comments are the result or prejudice, bigotry, idiocy, blind hatred, suppressed yearnings or a failure to understand weather, logic or the fact that we live in a universe where the laws of physics aren’t something you can make up to suit your views. However, it’s important to remember that, however outrageous the claim or however much fun it is to mock them, to be a true scientist it should be assessed rationally and objectively.

And, as alarming as it may seem for every right-minded Guardian reader out there, despite the fact that this very blog has previously said there are no scientific reasons to oppose it, it turns out there are actually scientific arguments to support the claim that same-sex marriage does indeed lead to floods.

The cause of floods is well understood by and large, but it can be summed up as an above-average amount of water turning up in a place that is not able to cope with it via containment, drainage etc. This can happen very quickly, meaning water enters an area faster than the ground itself can drain it away, and thus we get flash floods.

Floods can occur when a river “bursts its banks” or in coastal regions from the sea, if conditions are right. Typically when we think of floods, we think excessive rainfall. And this is where the problem lies.

There are several types of rain, depending on the process by which it occurs. Orographic or “relief” rain is when landmasses like mountains cause moist warm air to rise over them, cooling it in the process and causing the moisture to rain out. Frontal rain is similar, but instead of the mountain there’s a body of colder, denser air that warm wet air is forced to rise over, causing rain as it does so. There’s also convective rain, which is arguably the easiest to comprehend, where direct sunlight causes bodies of water to evaporate and rise into the air, where they rain out again.

The UK has been dealing with all of these types of rain for millennia (and complaining about them for almost exactly as long). However, the legalisation of same-sex marriage has thrown the delicate balance out of whack, with devastating results.

Logically, same-sex marriage leads to an increase in the number of weddings. Weddings invariably involve a large number of people congregating in one place, which leads to a lot of body heat and warming, and this heat enters the atmosphere, increasing the air temperature and producing more warm fronts. People also cry a lot at weddings. This is likely to be even more pronounced at same-sex weddings, with the added element of recently achieved equality making the events even more poignant. Tears are basically water, which quickly evaporate, thus adding to the water content of the atmosphere. Weddings also typically involve a lot of alcohol, which makes people colder, meaning they’re more likely to turn on heating systems when they arrive home, releasing more heat and CO2 into the atmosphere.

All of this leads to an increase in rainfall. But these are only the direct consequences of same-sex marriages; they can have an even greater effect indirectly.

This is often accompanied by a surge in angry comments/blogposts/online rants, generating heat via servers and computers. There is also an increase in newspaper space given over to those opposed to same-sex marriage complaining about their rights being eroded or them being censored with no self-awareness at all. All this newspaper comes from trees, and cutting down trees increases the risk of flooding.

These are just some of the ways that same-sex marriage can result in dangerous flooding. No doubt there are many more that are easily as probable as the ones discussed above (i.e. not even slightly). The main problem seems to stem from people becoming explicitly angry about the fact that two people of the same gender can get married in a way that doesn’t affect the rest of the population at all, and then blaming them for a series of devastating natural occurrences.

http://www.theguardian.com/science/b...-causes-floods

Mary Etheldreda 02-19-2014 06:16 AM

Re: PROOF: British study shows that floods are caused by gaysexual marriage!!
 
Mr. Alban, as a home educator, I've spent considerable time on the internet learning science to teach my children. This article is a very sound scientific explanation. As a mother and a Christian, I am extra appalled by the blatant disregard for fellow people the gays exhibit time and time again. Thank you for bringing this to our attention.

WilliamJenningsBryan 02-19-2014 07:22 AM

Re: PROOF: British study shows that floods are caused by gaysexual marriage!!
 
It's certainly fitting that the UK is beset by floods given that the Royal Navy has fostered generations of poofters amongst the general population - and NOW they all want to get married.

Someone should forward this scientific study to the IPCC - maybe the UK would like to institute a program of cap and trade for homers.

Johny Joe Hold 02-19-2014 03:42 PM

Re: PROOF: British study shows that floods are caused by gaysexual marriage!!
 
As Freehold's Mayor, I'm always concerned about our citizens' safety.

Here we sit near the Des Moines and Raccoon Rivers. In Downtown Des Moines is the Polk County Courthouse where countless homers weddings are performed.

Freehold has always been spared during other metro area floods. We know God will be pouring down his wrath on Des Moines soon. We all need to pray he spares Freehold yet again.

Alphonse Alban 02-19-2014 03:49 PM

Re: PROOF: British study shows that floods are caused by gaysexual marriage!!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Johny Joe Hold (Post 1066731)
As Freehold's Mayor, I'm always concerned about our citizens' safety.

Here we sit near the Des Moines and Raccoon Rivers. In Downtown Des Moines is the Polk County Courthouse where countless homers weddings are performed.

Freehold has always been spared during other metro area floods. We know God will be pouring down his wrath on Des Moines soon. We all need to pray he spares Freehold yet again.

Amen! Looks like Des Moineans have forgotten what happened last time when they were legalizing sodomy. If I remember correctly they held gaysexual weddings in Des Moines in 1850 and already 1851 whole city was wiped out by massive flood.

Did they learned their lesson? Well, they will learn soon enough. Again.

Kilgorr the eskimo 02-20-2014 10:05 PM

Re: PROOF: British study shows that floods are caused by gaysexual marriage!!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda (Post 1066632)
Mr. Alban, as a home educator, I've spent considerable time on the internet learning science to teach my children. This article is a very sound scientific explanation. As a mother and a Christian, I am extra appalled by the blatant disregard for fellow people the gays exhibit time and time again. Thank you for bringing this to our attention.

Mary, I would like to talk to you more. I am a Canadian woman, about to be a other, and have some differing views, but am interested in learning and discussing. My email is *** email address redacted *** Virginia

Mary Etheldreda 02-20-2014 10:13 PM

Re: PROOF: British study shows that floods are caused by gaysexual marriage!!
 
Are you interesting in homeschooling your children in the future? That's wonderful! You can see a typical True Christian™ home education schedule here: Why I Homeschool. We can discuss curriculum there if you'd like.

:)

Kilgorr the eskimo 02-20-2014 10:26 PM

Re: PROOF: British study shows that floods are caused by gaysexual marriage!!
 
Sorry, I'm not so swell on the internet. Stupid of me to post my email address!

Pastor Ezekiel 02-21-2014 03:53 AM

Re: PROOF: British study shows that floods are caused by gaysexual marriage!!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Kilgorr (Post 1067238)
Sorry, I'm not so swell on the internet. Stupid of me to post my email address!

Please make a thread of your own in the "Introductions" section of the forum, so that we can properly greet you. Tell us about yourself, your church, and how you came to find Jesus.

And if you're here to flame us, better take a look at THIS before making an even bigger ass out of yourself. :rtfm:

I will pray that the Holy Spirit enter you and chase the demons out of your rectum and let Jesus fill you with His Grace. If you use your God-given free will to reject Christ and His temporary death on the cross for my sins, then you are sending yourself to hellfire. :sinner:

GivenToSin 02-21-2014 10:33 AM

Re: PROOF: British study shows that floods are caused by gaysexual marriage!!
 
Th article doesn't prove the original poster's point. You are trying to make it say your deity somehow 'made' it flood. You are hijacking the article and calling it proof for proving what you already believe in your old book of stories.
I swear you people will never change.

Mary Etheldreda 02-21-2014 04:05 PM

Re: PROOF: British study shows that floods are caused by gaysexual marriage!!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by GivenToSin (Post 1067410)
Th article doesn't prove the original poster's point. You are trying to make it say your deity somehow 'made' it flood. You are hijacking the article and calling it proof for proving what you already believe in your old book of stories.
I swear you people will never change.

Did you read the article, dear? The science shows how the floods have increased since the installation of sodomy in England. God works through the natural world often, this is one example of how. The real message you should be taking away from this is that you cannot thwart the will of God, no matter how much you rationalize sin to yourself. The Lord God really hates anal sex.

demonkid 03-20-2014 02:53 AM

Re: PROOF: British study shows that floods are caused by gaysexual marriage!!
 
This article is amazing the facts are so eye opening it amazes me that these gays are such divine beings that they have the power to change nature:lex_12:

Pastor Ezekiel 03-20-2014 03:01 AM

Re: PROOF: British study shows that floods are caused by gaysexual marriage!!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by demonkid (Post 1074690)
This article is amazing the facts are so eye opening it amazes me that these gays are such divine beings that they have the power to change nature:lex_12:

Queers are demons sent by satan to drag kids like you down to hell. Think I'm kidding? Look at this!



Please make a thread of your own in the "Introductions" section of the forum, so that we can properly greet you. Tell us about yourself, your church, and how you came to find Jesus.

And if you're here to flame us, better take a look at THIS before making an even bigger ass out of yourself. :rtfm:

I will pray that the Holy Spirit enter you and chase the demons out of your rectum and let Jesus fill you with His Grace. If you use your God-given free will to reject Christ and His temporary death on the cross for my sins, then you are sending yourself to hellfire. :sinner:

TaraAnne 03-20-2014 03:15 AM

Re: PROOF: British study shows that floods are caused by gaysexual marriage!!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda (Post 1067230)
Are you interesting in homeschooling your children in the future? That's wonderful! You can see a typical True Christian™ home education schedule here: Why I Homeschool. We can discuss curriculum there if you'd like.

:)

Sister Mary,

I home schooled both my boys! Needless to say the Texas schools are well the pits. Once they took the Prayer out of school I certainly did not want my boys persecuted for their beliefs. They were never exposed to the liberal lifestyle and Godlessness that is rampant these days. Public schools are nothing more than a pool for germs and not the ones that make you sick!

Home schooling is the only way to go if you love your children!


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