Antique Battle-Axe For Sale
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The mother-in-law just can't pull the cart anymore. She tries to help the wife in the kitchen, God bless her, but frankly, beating her for leaving spots on the drinking glasses isn't nearly as satisfying as it was a couple years ago when she was only 98. I am only asking $10.00 American for her. I'm sure she could probably be of some use still, maybe as a practice dummy for young Christian man-children to hone their wife-correction techniques on, or you could just roll her wheel-chair in the corner and let her draw off flies from the rest of the house during the summer, if she lasts that long. If anyone is interested, let me know. I am not firm on the price, and am open to negotiation. Serious offers only, please. |
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The price is a bit steep. If it could be reduced to, say, absolutely nothing, I would consider it. My neighbor Mrs. Johnson keeps buying dogs faster than I can shoot those annoying creatures and your mother-in-law looks like she would be great at scaring dogs away. She would of course have to build her own place to sleep, grow her own foot and pay rent.
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I gave her an iron-boot from my inquisition chamber, but she refuses to wear it. I'll throw that in, too. Maybe someone else will have better luck persuading her. |
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YiC AW |
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She looks all skin and bones, I doubt you could make a decent soap out of her.:thumbdown:
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I got a call from the shipping people. Apparently the package will be delayed. I think the reason was bad smell, but the Indian call center slut was very hard to understand, so it could be anything. Did you include enough water in the crate for you mother-in-law to survive an extra day?
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I got another call from the hellbound Indian call center whore. Apparently the crate started making noise, so clearly your mother-in-law is still in great shape. I explained to the Indian call center harlot why she will burn in Hell for all eternity and then she hung up, but I am certain the crate will arrive real soon now. My grandson was crying a bit since we had to postpone his birthday but after a firm beating he recognized the wrong of his ways.
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The crate still hasn't arrived here. I had to beat up the grandkid three times today to get him to stop whining about his delayed birthday.
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The crate finally arrived. Unfortunately she ate what was left over from the cake and she even ate the candles. I gave her a severe beating for that and ordered her to make new candles and to use the wood of the crate to build her living quarters. As soon as she makes new candles, we can finally have that birthday. She smells horrible by the way, I hope that is temporary.
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