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-   -   Are showers the women's ride to Satan's arms? (https://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=19458)

Brother_Dustin 02-03-2009 12:36 AM

Are showers the women's ride to Satan's arms?
 
Hello friends,

I noticed that you have a lot of threads about women and how they should act and be treated. :thumbsup:
I discovered a situation that I have not yet found the answer to. You see, just the other day I walked in on my wife in the shower (I don't allow her to lock any doors in the house, unless I say otherwise) and I was led to believe that she was pleasuring herself. We have a retractable shower head, and when I walked in, it was near her devil's layer and she seemed unusually embarrassed. :fear2:

Though I did punish her, I don't know what else to do beyond these lines.
I need advice on what the right thing to do would be.

Your Brother in Faith,
Dustin

Pastor Ezekiel 02-03-2009 12:45 AM

Re: Are showers the women's ride to Satan's arms?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Brother_Dustin (Post 289347)
Hello friends,

I noticed that you have a lot of threads about women and how they should act and be treated. :thumbsup:
I discovered a situation that I have not yet found the answer to. You see, just the other day I walked in on my wife in the shower (I don't allow her to lock any doors in the house, unless I say otherwise) and I was led to believe that she was pleasuring herself. We have a retractable shower head, and when I walked in, it was near her devil's layer and she seemed unusually embarrassed. :fear2:

Though I did punish her, I don't know what else to do beyond these lines.
I need advice on what the right thing to do would be.

Your Brother in Faith,
Dustin

Daily paddlings, an hour in her Prayer closet each morning, and no more showers! Take out that demonic contraption and restrict her to baths from now on.

I'm not sure why a Christian Man would need advice on how to discipline his own wife. :glare:

Brother_Dustin 02-03-2009 01:05 AM

Re: Are showers the women's ride to Satan's arms?
 
Thank You Pastor.

Well, I have been paddling her daily since the incident and I have made her spend an hour and a half at the foot of her bed every morning and night. I also don't let her shower or bathe without me supervising her.
Due to the fact that she is pregnant with my fourth son, I've been going a little lighter on the beatings. Because of that I feel that she isn't being punished enough, what else could I do? I will not let her leave the house, except for grocery shopping, in which case I make my oldest son go with her, until I feel that the LORD has forgiven her. But how can I test her, to know that she has truly relieved from her sins?

Your Brother in Faith,
Dustin

Nobar King 02-03-2009 02:06 AM

Re: Are showers the women's ride to Satan's arms?
 
Call a plumber and have a fixed shower head installed. Or, just duct tape the one you have to the bracket that holds it.

Bob4God 02-03-2009 02:19 AM

Re: Are showers the women's ride to Satan's arms?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Brother_Dustin (Post 289359)
Due to the fact that she is pregnant with my fourth son, I've been going a little lighter on the beatings.

Nonsense brother, beat the hellfire out of her! In the old days a REAL man never hesitated to throw his wife a good beating, regardless of whether she was pregnant or not. Back then they didn't buy into all this liberal sissy sensitivity and tolerance foolishness. Pound her HARD.

My father used to slug momma in the gut when she was pregnant with me, and it taught her AND me a lesson! I turned out fine, so will your son! :thumbsup:

EDIT: Brother Nobar has some good advice, but make sure she doesn't take a step-ladder into the shower with her to enable her to reach the mounted shower head.

Brother_Dustin 02-03-2009 02:20 AM

Re: Are showers the women's ride to Satan's arms?
 
Thank You Nobar King and believe me, it IS duct taped.

William Snodgrass 02-03-2009 04:09 AM

Re: Are showers the women's ride to Satan's arms?
 
Is your wife a Christian also?

Brother_Dustin 02-06-2009 01:34 AM

Re: Are showers the women's ride to Satan's arms?
 
Well, of course, my wife is a Christian! I would not marry any other SCUM!
How can you ask me such a degrading question??

SUV 02-06-2009 02:38 PM

Re: Are showers the women's ride to Satan's arms?
 
Greetings, Brother Dustin. This is the first time I've become aware of you on Our Godly Board®

I Hope that you and I shall get to really know each other - in the Biblical sense.

:innocent:

High Queen of Dorkness 03-01-2009 10:59 AM

Re: Are showers the women's ride to Satan's arms?
 
I shower all the time, and I'm fine.:innocent:

Once was lost 03-01-2009 02:01 PM

Re: Are showers the women's ride to Satan's arms?
 
Brother-Dustin
Quote:

Though I did punish her, I don't know what else to do beyond these lines.
I need advice on what the right thing to do would be.
You missed the first step. You did not punish her. Please listen to those who are offering you advice in here. I know i do and it helps me greatly each tiime i read their posts. I will be a better Christian for doing so.

OJohnathanEPennings3 03-02-2009 12:11 AM

Re: Are showers the women's ride to Satan's arms?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by High Queen of Dorkness (Post 299636)
I shower all the time, and I'm fine.:innocent:

I think not, because you are in a men only forum

Negative_Cool 03-02-2009 01:15 PM

Re: Are showers the women's ride to Satan's arms?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Brother_Dustin (Post 289393)
Thank You Nobar King and believe me, it IS duct taped.

I wouldn't trust duct tape, most of it is made by commie china men. I know I've had accidents with it before.

Nobar King 03-02-2009 02:47 PM

Re: Are showers the women's ride to Satan's arms?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Negative_Cool (Post 300725)
I wouldn't trust duct tape, most of it is made by commie china men. I know I've had accidents with it before.

Those are fighting words, you negative nellie. Anything can be fixed with duct tape.

Pastor Ezekiel 03-02-2009 11:36 PM

Re: Are showers the women's ride to Satan's arms?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Nobar King (Post 300746)
Those are fighting words, you negative nellie. Anything can be fixed with duct tape.

Cool down Brother Nobar, remember your blood pressure. :o

This fellow is an Austrian. The duct tape they get is the inferior stuff made in the Orient. You and I have access to the good stuff, the original Duct Tape® made in America.

Another reason to thank God for not punishing us by being foreigners.

Bobby-Joe 03-02-2009 11:59 PM

Re: Are showers the women's ride to Satan's arms?
 
This reminds of some horrible rumors I heard about during my missionary days about sinners duct taping hamsters so they wouldn't explode when you debauched yourself on them. People who spread these rumors are terrible and cruel folks out to trick the unwary into embarrassing a illegal acts. Jesus will make those rumor spreaders pay for their lies.

Negative_Cool 03-03-2009 12:28 AM

Re: Are showers the women's ride to Satan's arms?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel (Post 300978)
Cool down Brother Nobar, remember your blood pressure. :o

This fellow is an Austrian. The duct tape they get is the inferior stuff made in the Orient. You and I have access to the good stuff, the original Duct Tape® made in America.

Another reason to thank God for not punishing us by being foreigners.

There is superior non chinese/taiwanese/malaysian/cambodain/vietnamese duct tape?

If this is true, please accept my apologies Brother Nobar, I may have been too quick to judge.

LissyLovesHerself 03-03-2009 01:34 AM

Re: Are showers the women's ride to Satan's arms?
 
Hmm. Do you guys really think its right to beat your wives? If so then not good. Jesus doesnt want that. You poor, poor naive people. This saddens me.
By the way, you beat your wife when shes pregnant, you'll go to jail for possibly the rest of your life if caught. Have fun worshipping God from the cellar!
Mean and Woman are EQUAL! =)

Negative_Cool 03-03-2009 01:43 AM

Re: Are showers the women's ride to Satan's arms?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by LissyLovesHerself (Post 301049)
Hmm. Do you guys really think its right to beat your wives? If so then not good. Jesus doesnt want that. You poor, poor naive people. This saddens me.
By the way, you beat your wife when shes pregnant, you'll go to jail for possibly the rest of your life if caught. Have fun worshipping God from the cellar!
Mean and Woman are EQUAL! =)

Equal doesn't mean the same, you sound like you have bought into all this pansy liberal propaganda. If I have to choose between what the Bible says and what some left wing bra burning hippie says, I'll choose the Bible every time!

Your brother in Christ, NC.

Jordan 03-04-2009 01:14 AM

Re: Are showers the women's ride to Satan's arms?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Brother_Dustin (Post 289347)
Hello friends,

I noticed that you have a lot of threads about women and how they should act and be treated. :thumbsup:
I discovered a situation that I have not yet found the answer to. You see, just the other day I walked in on my wife in the shower (I don't allow her to lock any doors in the house, unless I say otherwise) and I was led to believe that she was pleasuring herself. We have a retractable shower head, and when I walked in, it was near her devil's layer and she seemed unusually embarrassed. :fear2:

Though I did punish her, I don't know what else to do beyond these lines.
I need advice on what the right thing to do would be.

Your Brother in Faith,
Dustin


You're a sick twisted man. piffle, like you are messed up in the head.


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