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Mrs. Mary Whitford 01-21-2010 10:38 PM

Bring us the souls of PZ Meyers, Dick Dawkins, and Chris Hitchens
 
I am pleased as punch to announce a brand new reward for any True Christian™ who is able to wrestle down Satan and save the souls of notorious fundamentalist atheists Paul Zachary Meyers, Richard "Dick" Dawkins, and Christopher Hitchens!
These three rabid liberal anti-Americans have been spitting in the Lord's face long enough, doing everything in their power to do the devil's work and recruit the weaker-minded sinners of the world to their baseless religion of atheism and Darwinism, throwing junk "science" at our nation's youth and destroying what makes this country great!
There are only two things we can do to counteract their insidious influence. 1) Pray, and pray hard. 2) INTRODUCE THEM TO THE GOOD NEWS OF THE SAVIOR, OUR LORD JESUS CHRIST. The Messiah came 2000 years ago and it's time they heard His Word!
For the fortunate congregants who are blessed by finally getting these militant God-haters to crack open a Bible and bringing them into Jesus' arms, you will receive the following...

- One month of no tithing required.
- A free pew upgrade for a year (if you are a Silver Tither, you will get to sit with the Gold Tithers at services. If you are a Platinum Tither, you will get to sit in brand new La-Z-Boy recliners right up by the pastors).
- A coupon for 50% off any entree at Big Bill's Bibles & Burgers with the purchase of another entree of the same value or higher.
- A free haircut at any of my husband Mr. Whitford's barber shops.
- Recognition at the first Sunday service following your winning of the soul for Christ.

Good luck, and GOD BLESS!

Talitha 01-21-2010 10:44 PM

Re: Bring us the souls of PZ Meyers, Dick Dawkins, and Chris Hitc
 
GLORY!!!

Taming The Unholy Trinity will not be an easy thing to do, but I'm sure the promise of a new La-Z-Boy recliner is going to make this a worthy task.

You haven't said whether you want them dead or alive. Or doesn't it matter?

Bobby-Joe 01-21-2010 10:48 PM

Re: Bring us the souls of PZ Meyers, Dick Dawkins, and Chris Hitc
 
Glory! It is time Jesus SERVED these three their papers for the crimes against decency they committed. They think they can just sit their in their ivory towers, sucking off the public tit while mocking everything good and TRUE Americans hold dear. Between Myers and tentacle obsessed "blog", Dawkins with "how to worship the monkey" books and Hitches drunken demogary it is no wonder the country is in the mess it is!

Rev. Jim Osborne 01-21-2010 10:55 PM

Re: Bring us the souls of PZ Meyers, Dick Dawkins, and Chris Hitc
 
I once had a public debate with Richard Dawkins in 1986. The university press deemed he had "won", but only because they were biased atheists who were purposely ignoring the Truth. During one point in the debate, Dawkins asked me "Well, Rev. Osborne, if God is so omnipotent and can cure people due to the power of prayer, why hasn't he healed any amputees?" The audience chuckled. He and his minions thought he had me cornered.

Without missing a beat, I responded: "Actually, he has." The crowd fell silent. I went on to explain that I've had several viewers of my television show who have written me letters saying that God had re-grew their limbs. He was then taken aback by this and tried to regain his ground. He asked: "Can you prove this? Do you have medical records to show this has truly happened?"

I responded that he was advocating breaking the law by trying to compromise patient-doctor confidentiality. I also accused him of moving the goal posts. "What's the point, Dr. Dawkins?" I asked. "You asked if God has healed amputees, and I responded He has. Now you are demanding further proof. Even if I showed you proof, then you would demand that I prove the reports were real and accurate. You atheists keep demanding more proof everytime we give you some. You keep moving the goal posts."

A few people who supported me cheered, the rest snickered. Dawkins just laughed and said "Moving on...". So typical of atheists to change the subject when they know they lost. I received a lot of derisive letters after the debate from people for claiming that God has healed amputees.

I am doubtful these men can be converted because they are so stonewalled in their Anti-God religion that they refuse to see the Truth, even if it's in front of their own eyes.

Mrs. Mary Whitford 01-21-2010 10:55 PM

Re: Bring us the souls of PZ Meyers, Dick Dawkins, and Chris Hitc
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Talitha (Post 456349)
You haven't said whether you want them dead or alive. Or doesn't it matter?

Alive! I can't imagine anything bringing Jesus more joy than watching these three spread His Word after denying it for so long! PRAISE! :yahoo:

Petal 01-22-2010 04:26 AM

Re: Bring us the souls of PZ Meyers, Dick Dawkins, and Chris Hitc
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Miss.Bootiful Sister Mary Maria (Post 456345)

^_^ i thinks Mr.Hitchens gots a real good shot at gettin saveds, cuz he wroted a book all abouts how evil Momma Teresa was, how she were bestest buds wiv Mr.Papa Doc an Mrs.Baby Doc :icon8:, an how she were a greedy ole bag an stuff. :angry: when someone hate Momma Teresa, it mean they gots somethang in commin wiv lord God :) i be prayin for Mr.Hitchens soul -_-


this be Momma Teresa when she were alives ---> :devil: :sinner: <--- an that be her rite nows, yay!:D

animaspaine 01-23-2010 05:04 PM

Re: Bring us the souls of PZ Meyers, Dick Dawkins, and Chris Hitc
 
This threads proves that atheists have higher moral standards than the average Christfag.

God B-LESS

GOD=life 01-23-2010 05:11 PM

Re: Bring us the souls of PZ Meyers, Dick Dawkins, and Chris Hitc
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by animaspaine (Post 457989)
This threads proves that atheists have higher moral standards than the average Christfag.

Right, so according to your moral standards:
  • Making sweeping statements about Christians is OK based on the posting on >> 1 << Christian forum.
  • Homophobia is OK when YOU do it
Atheists... :lol:

James Dewitt 01-23-2010 05:12 PM

Re: Bring us the souls of PZ Meyers, Dick Dawkins, and Chris Hitc
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by animaspaine (Post 457989)
This threads proves that atheists have higher moral standards than the average Christfag.

God B-LESS

Welcome to Gods Favorite Forum™, as a new person you should go to the Introduction section and create a thread . Its the polite thing to do!
We then can discuss why you are a God Mocker.

GOD=life 01-23-2010 05:14 PM

Re: Bring us the souls of PZ Meyers, Dick Dawkins, and Chris Hitc
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by James Dewitt (Post 457991)
Its the polite thing to do!

I applaud your Christian intentions Mr. Dewitt, but I suspect the atheist moral code does not allow for their followers to be polite :innocent:

James Dewitt 01-23-2010 05:32 PM

Re: Bring us the souls of PZ Meyers, Dick Dawkins, and Chris Hitc
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by GOD=life (Post 457992)
I applaud your Christian intentions Mr. Dewitt, but I suspect the atheist moral code does not allow for their followers to be polite :innocent:


I completely understand Brother, as we all know atheist have no morals . With out the Word of God what guides them?

But I still try to find the good in all.

Cranky Old Man 01-23-2010 06:22 PM

Re: Bring us the souls of PZ Meyers, Dick Dawkins, and Chris Hitc
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by animaspaine (Post 457989)
This threads proves that atheists have higher moral standards than the average Christfag. God B-LESS

So nice of you to create an account just for letting us know that! Now please die and go to hell :sinner:.

Rev. M. Rodimer 02-01-2010 10:37 PM

Re: Bring us the souls of PZ Meyers, Dick Dawkins, and Chris Hitc
 
Thank you, Sister Mary Maria and Landover, for promoting the Salvation™ of three of the Four Horsemen of the Atheist Apocalypse!

What about that Dennett fellow?

Mrs. Mary Whitford 02-01-2010 10:40 PM

Re: Bring us the souls of PZ Meyers, Dick Dawkins, and Chris Hitc
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Rev. M. Rodimer (Post 465666)
What about that Dennett fellow?

Who? :huh:

Bobby-Joe 02-01-2010 10:52 PM

Re: Bring us the souls of PZ Meyers, Dick Dawkins, and Chris Hitc
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Sister Mary Maria (Post 465671)
Who? :huh:

Daniel "Big Dan" Dennett, the four horseman of the Atheist apocalypse. AKA the Pimp Daddy of the New Atheists for the way he whores out ideas like they can be used and discarded like migrant workers. Because he comes across as a "nice guy" he maybe the most dangerous of the lot since he is trying to turn the nations youth into a bunch doctrine sluts.


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