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-   -   10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER! (http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=44593)

Cranky Old Man 06-11-2010 10:55 PM

10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER!
 
10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER!
http://www.soccersucks.net/soccer_hair_7.jpg

There is a reason why God's favorite nation America could care less about soccer while Hell bound nations like Australia, Iceland, Holland, New Zealand, Ireland, and Denmark are all playing soccer (some even dare to call it football) all the time. While Americans play God's chosen sports like Baseball, American Football and Basketball the rest of the world is pleasing Satan with soccer. Everyone either involved or interested in soccer will burn in Hell for all eternity. :sinner:

1st Corinthians 10:31 "Whether therefore ye eat, or drink, or whatsoever ye do, do all to the glory of God."

#1 Soccer is all about lying and cheating!
The most common way to win a soccer match is to trick the referee into giving you a penalty by feigning an injury, to make it appear as if a foul has been committed. Soccer players are specialized in dropping down and pretending to be hurt. They study children of 3 years or younger to learn how to perfect this technique. If the match is very important, like a world championship, they usually just bribe the referee to win. Proverbs 6:16-19 "... the LORD hate ... a lying tongue ... A false witness that speaketh lies ..."

#2 Soccer players want to be treated like prophets!
Too weak or slow to play football? Play soccer. Too short or slow to play basketball? Play soccer. Even though soccer doesn't require any athletic talent or advanced motor skills, soccer players somehow convinced themselves to be very special. Huge crowds of drunk soccer fans worship these arrogant brats as if they are Jesus Christ Himself. Matthew 24:24 "... false prophets ... deceive the very elect."

#3 Soccer is mostly about sex and drugs!
In 1974 the Dutch lost the World Championship soccer because their players had so much sex and drugs before the world cup final with Germany that they forgot to show up. Someone even wrote a book about it! Ephesians 5:18 "... be not drunk ..."

#4 Soccer players are extremely lazy!
If you have a very strong stomach and you can watch soccer for a few minutes without puking your guts out, just pay attention to a single player. It doesn't matter which one. Most of the time this player will either be standing still, or slowly walking from one place to another. If you look even closer you will notice all players only cover a small part of the playing field to minimize the chance of getting tired to an absolute minimum. Proverbs 12:24 "... the lazy man ..."

#5 Soccer prevents people from going to Church!
Most soccer training and soccer matches are on Sundays! Satan deliberately designed soccer this way to doom as much people as possible to Hell by preventing them from going to Church! Acts 20:17 "... the elders of the church."

#6 Soccer makes people gay!
Soccer is all about grown man hugging and touching each other in ways only gays would approve off. The favorite part of a soccer match is when the actual match is over and all players can get naked together in a huge shower. There is not a single soccer player in the world who is not gay. It's reasons like this that make ultra-gays like Sir Elton John a soccer fan! Romans 1:26-27 "... burned in their lust one toward another; men with men working that which is unseemly ..."
http://www.soccersucks.net/soccer_perversion_23.jpg http://www.soccersucks.net/soccer_perversion_18.jpg http://www.soccersucks.net/soccer_perversion_3.jpg

#7 God has sent us many signs He hates Soccer!
God has warned humanity many times by sending crystal clear signs that He hates soccer! Clear signs like the Heyse Stadium disaster, the Hillsborough disaster, the Orkney Stadium Disaster, the Ellis Park Stadium Disaster and the Accra Sports Stadium Disaster leave 0% room for doubt that God hates soccer with a vengeance! Luke 18:27 "... The things which are impossible with men are possible with God."

#8 Soccer supporters are extremely violent!
If a bunch of soccer hooligans would have attacked Afghanistan, we would have won already! Soccer violence is without limits and is the most extreme form of violence known to man. Soccer hooligans are all totally insane psychopaths who completely lose every shred of humanity. Psalm 73:6 "... violence covereth them as a garment ..."

#9 Soccer and fascism are actually the same thing!
No one in their right mind can deny the connection between soccer and fascism. It is very common for soccer fans to wear Nazi symbols and to shout Nazi insults during soccer matches. In German concentration camps zyklon was used to kill as many Jews as possible. For this reason Umbro named their extremely popular soccer shoe Zyklon!

The English (!) soccer team in 1938:
http://www.soccersucks.net/soccer_fascism_4.jpg

#10 France is successful at soccer!

And to prove for once and for all that God really really hates soccer, just note that France is successful at soccer! :fear2: Psalm 9:17 "... all the nations that forget God."

All people wasting time on soccer need to repent and accept Jesus Christ as their savior! Until then, they will suffer and they will burn in Hell along with people wasting time on Tennis, Golf, Cricket, Gymnastics, Swimming, Ice Skating, Lacrosse, Curling, Rugby, Softball, Cycling, Hiking, Horse Racing, Skiing, Snowboarding, Triathlon, Wrestling, etc.

Felicity 06-11-2010 11:03 PM

Re: 10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER!
 
@Cranky Old Man I am glad my father does not allow me to get involved in soccer! :innocent:

Nobar King 06-11-2010 11:08 PM

Re: 10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER!
 
You don't have to convince me. I already hate soccer. There are a lot of reasons that this 'sport' isn't more popular.

  • It's a kid's game
  • slow
  • boring
  • wait forever for someone to score and that dumb announcer yells goooooooooooalllllllllllllll as if it's the most exciting thing that ever happened.

Jeb Stuart Thurmond 06-11-2010 11:18 PM

Re: 10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Cranky Old Man (Post 538562)

Now this gives the term "pothead" a whole new meaning. Also, isn't this guy the soccer player who bit off another soccer player's ear? And remember that time when a soccer player hired a hitman to club another soccer player's knee before the big game?

You never hear about American athletes doing anything like that.

Cranky Old Man 06-12-2010 12:07 AM

Re: 10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Jeb Thurmond (Post 538570)
Also, isn't this guy the soccer player who bit off another soccer player's ear?

Yes. But it can get even worse than that! :fear2:

http://www.soccersucks.net/soccer_perversion_2.jpg

WinnerNotSinner 06-12-2010 12:42 AM

Re: 10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER!
 
Nice work, Cranky. I take it this whole World Cup charade has got on your nerves too?

A soccer tournament is like a competition of "who's the gayest". 80 minutes of the game is wasted with passing it amongst defenders, and the final 10 is of people falling over for sympathy!

I am British, but it annoys the hell out of me when people refer to this girls game as "football". It's soccer! It's only fair the name "football" is blessed to the superior American counterpart and the sport favoured by Jesus. The hooligan supporters try to overcompensate for the games lack of manliness by being as aggressive and barbaric as possible, but only really succeeding in showing their clear homosexuality of willing to fight over 11 men chasing a ball in tight shorts.

Pastor Ezekiel 06-12-2010 03:03 AM

Re: 10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER!
 
The referees are queer as a three dollar bill too.


Phebe Carlyle 06-12-2010 06:49 AM

Re: 10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER!
 
It certainly does make people gay!

http://amazingdata.com/mediadata35/I...2531810668.jpg

http://www.yeah-oops.com/wp-content/...gaysports2.jpg

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_aPjPiA37Bn...GaySports3.jpg

http://coedmagazine.files.wordpress....y_soccer_1.jpg

It MUST be stopped!:fear2:

Justin Z 06-12-2010 09:39 AM

Soccer is gayer than Liberace.

Dirk 06-12-2010 12:27 PM

Re: 10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER!
 
This is one of the main reasons for me to leave the Netherlands and get back to the Godly USA.

Austin Strait 06-12-2010 03:38 PM

Re: 10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER!
 
I agree whole-heartedly.

Soccer players are deceitful (hope I spelt that right) lying worms, with no sense of truth or sportsmanship. Collapsing on the floor in apparent agony when another player so much as brushes against them.

If a human being ( if they can be called that) is in that much pain from so gentle a touch, I would want to do the decent thing, walk onto the pitch and send them prematurely to eternal damnation.

I have forbidden my son to join the local Soccer team. I instead went to his school and signed him up myself for the Baseball team. As long as it does not interfere with Bible Studies. (I dont want him to make the same mistakes I did)

Benedict A. Davis 06-12-2010 10:44 PM

Re: 10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER!
 
Landover Baptist church publishes article on soccer.Read it here folks
http://www.landoverbaptist.org/2010/june/worldcup.html

handmaiden 06-12-2010 11:04 PM

Re: 10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Nobar King (Post 538568)
You don't have to convince me. I already hate soccer. There are a lot of reasons that this 'sport' isn't more popular.

  • It's a kid's game
  • slow
  • boring
  • wait forever for someone to score and that dumb announcer yells goooooooooooalllllllllllllll as if it's the most exciting thing that ever happened.

Not only is soccer a kids game, but some of the kids playing it are girls!

Any sport that can be played by girls that boys also play is , by definition, gay.

Take figure skating--duh! Take baseball-- boys play it, but girls play softball.

Now take football-- there is no girls' football! Football is warrior training and girls are not fit for such activity. Girls cheer on the warrior/players as is right in God's eyes. Just as the women of the Bible praised David in his victories.

I Samuel 21:11- "Did they not sing one to another of him in dances, saying, Saul has slain his thousands and David his ten thousands?"


Goooo David! Or better yet, Goooooo Jesus!

Praisefully Yours,

Handmaiden

Bryan Tamariki 06-13-2010 01:29 AM

Re: 10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by handmaiden (Post 539143)
Not only is soccer a kids game, but some of the kids playing it are girls!

Any sport that can be played by girls that boys also play is , by definition, gay.

Take figure skating--duh! Take baseball-- boys play it, but girls play softball.

Now take football-- there is no girls' football! Football is warrior training and girls are not fit for such activity. Girls cheer on the warrior/players as is right in God's eyes. Just as the women of the Bible praised David in his victories.

I Samuel 21:11- "Did they not sing one to another of him in dances, saying, Saul has slain his thousands and David his ten thousands?"


Goooo David! Or better yet, Goooooo Jesus!

Praisefully Yours,

Handmaiden


Actually not all sports that can be played by girls that boys also play are gay. Rugby Union is not usually gay.

New Zealand's Black Ferns are the Women's Rugby (Union) World Cup Champions. The first Women's Rugby World Cup was held in 1991, and won by
the United States of America!
:usa27:
:usa27::usa27::usa27::usa27::usa27::usa27::usa27:

2010 Women's World Cup: Black Ferns countdown


James Mortimer - (14/05/2010)

Quote:

Just over three months, and under 100 days until the current World Champions, the Black Ferns, begin their title defence with a match against the South African women at Surrey Sports Park in Guildford, England.



The sixth edition of the Women’s World Cup will see the Black Ferns not only attempt to defend their title, but also try to win their fourth consecutive global crown, having won in Netherlands, Spain and Canada over the last 12 years.

This year there is clearly a considerable focus on Women’s rugby, with the Rugby Football Union for Women (RFUW) and organising body Rugby World Cup Limited (RWCL) keen to deliver a memorable and exciting tournament, played in England over August and September.

RWCL Chairman Bernard Lapasset heralded the countdown of the tournament, with an official function held midweek to celebrate the 100 day mark.

“This landmark represents the countdown to what promises to be a memorable and ultimately successful Women's Rugby World Cup,” Lapasset said to www.rwcwomens.com

“In 100 days' time, the top 12 international teams in the world will compete for the ultimate prize in Women's fifteen-a-side rugby in what will be a true celebration of the strength and stature of the Women's game.”

“We are confident that planning and preparation are ahead of schedule and excitement around the tournament is growing by the day.”

The Black Ferns have had a mixed build up.

Cancellation of the Women’s NPC was an unfortunate but necessary manoeuvre after the challenging financial landscape post Global Financial Crisis. The proposed series against Canada also fell through, leaving the New Zealand women with no top level competition, but the act had a silver lining for the World Champions.

The Black Ferns have been able to spend a large amount of time together as a unit, and knew too well they were far from untouchable as a world power, considering their loss to England in their final game at Twickenham late last year.

Vicky Heighway, who was the captain of the Black Ferns on last year’s English tour (beat England A, and drew the two test series with England), reflected on the team as the build up began to move up a notch.

"In many ways, no NPC this year has benefited the Black Ferns as we have a lot of time together away from those games and it's allowed fringe players more time to work and try and get into the squad,” Heighway said to leading women’s rugby site scrumqueens.com

"If the NPC had been on this year you'd expect the Black Ferns squad to have been picked by now but instead we've got a larger group of players with more time to fight for players."

"The ideal think would be for us to have some games in June or July but that not being the case we've got a regional tournament for the top 100 players in the country in Hamilton then so we need to make the most of that."

"We've been working individually on our own fitness and weight trainings over our summer and getting together regionally to build on that. We recently got together for a Black Ferns camp in Rotorua with 34 players and with the way our season works it was the first taste of contact a lot of us have had in a while so it was a bit of an initiation for the body to get used to again!"

The Black Ferns will approach the tournament as warm favourites, although England will be a formidable challenge, considering their morale boosting win against the champions last year, and the fact that they are the home team.

New Zealand will face South Africa, Australia and Wales in Pool A, with all group matches played at Surrey Sports Park in Guildford.

It is a tough pool that will quickly get the Black Ferns back to full match fitness, with the real threats to come from the hosts, France, Canada and the United States.

The semi-finals, third place playoff and final will be played at the Twickenham Stoop, the home of Harlequins in the western suburbs of London.

The Black Ferns expected England to be their biggest threat.

“England are always well drilled with strong set pieces and around the field perhaps in the last game we didn't adjust quick enough to how they were playing. They are always a huge threat and we know this World Cup will be really competitive,” Heighway said.

The hosts will have an advantage in the fact that they played in the 2010 Women’s Six Nations tournament. England cantered through the tournament, winning all five matches and the Grand Slam, scoring 156 points and 26 tries while conceding just the 15 points.

France finished second, losing to England 11-10.

The 2010 Women’s Rugby World Cup begins on the 20th August, with the final scheduled for the 5th September.

Provisional Black Ferns squad

Shakira Baker (Wellington),Zoey Berry (Otago), Kelly Brazier (Otago), Olivia Coady (Canterbury), Kendra Cocksedge (Canterbury), Barbara Chittock (Canterbury), Victoria Grant (nee Blackledge) (Auckland), Halie Hurring (Canterbury), Victoria Heighway (Auckland), Trish Hina (Auckland), Carla Hohepa (Otago), Linda Itunu (Auckland), Emma Jensen (Auckland), Crystal Kaua (Auckland), Justine Lavea (Auckland), Ruth McKay (Manawatu), Rebecca Mahoney (nee Hull) (Wellington), Beth Mallard (Otago), Huriana Manuel (Auckland), Amanda Murphy (Canterbury), Karina Penetito (Auckland), Casey Robertson (Canterbury), Vita Robinson (Auckland), Claire Rowat (Wellington), Melissa Ruscoe (Canterbury), Stephanie Te Ohaere-Fox (Canterbury), Anika Tiplady (Canterbury), Doris Taufateau (Auckland), Teresa Te Tamaki (Auckland), Kimberly Smith (Canterbury), Aimee Sutorius (Wellington), Shaan Waru (Hawke’s Bay), Renee Wickcliffe (Auckland)
Unavailable for camp: Aroha Savage (injured) and Fiao’o Faamausili, Amiria Rule (injured), Faanati Aniseko (bereavement leave).

The qualifiers for the Rugby World Cup 2010

Europe - 6 teams

England and France qualified directly as runner-up and third place in the WRWC 2006. Wales and Ireland qualified for the tournament as second and third in the RBS Ladies 6 Nations 2009. Scotland and Sweden, qualified as the top two teams from the FIRA-AER Women’s European Trophy 2009, held in Sweden from May 17 to May 23 2009. This competition was made up of the 5th and 6th placed Six Nations teams (Scotland and Italy) as well as Spain, Netherlands, Russia, Sweden, Germany and Belgium.

Americas - 2 teams

USA and Canada qualified directly

Africa - 1 team

South Africa qualified directly

Asia - 1 team

Kazakhstan won the ARFU Women’s XV Tournament, defeating Japan in the final 43-5, to qualify as the Asia representative.

Oceania - 2 teams

New Zealand qualified directly as winner of the WRWC 2006.
Australia beat Samoa in a one off ma
http://www.allblacks.com/news/12997/...rns-countdown-

Phebe Carlyle 06-13-2010 02:16 AM

Re: 10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER!
 
AFL is a homer sport.

YIC,

Mrs.P.Wintersnow

handmaiden 06-13-2010 02:26 AM

Re: 10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Bryan Tamariki (Post 539186)
Actually not all sports that can be played by girls that boys also play are gay. Rugby Union is not usually gay.


For girls it is.




Correctingly Yours,

Handmaiden

Storm Donderslag 06-13-2010 09:48 AM

Re: 10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER!
 
Dirk you left the Netherlands for the "godly'' USA?


I actualy play soccer and it does require skills when played correctly, in Holland a lot of people play soccer and we're good at it (Nr 4 of the world)
The world cup brings people together and makes us forget all the wars and problems for a while... :thumbsup:

Dirk 06-13-2010 09:56 AM

Re: 10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Storm Donderslag (Post 539368)
Dirk you left the Netherlands for the "godly'' USA?

Not yet, but I soon will.:thumbsup:
I still need to say goodbye to all my students.

Quote:

I actualy play soccer and it does require skills when played correctly, in Holland a lot of people play soccer and we're good at it (Nr 4 of the world)
The world cup brings people together and makes us forget all the wars and problems for a while... :thumbsup:
You're good at it, I knew it! That's why Holland has won the World Cup back in............when was it again?

Storm Donderslag 06-13-2010 10:16 AM

Re: 10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER!
 
We haven't won the world cup yet but we did win the Euro Cup and apart from Brazil and Argentina the best Soccer countries in the world are from Europe..

Waar geef je dan les btw?

Dirk 06-13-2010 10:50 AM

Re: 10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Storm Donderslag (Post 539378)
We haven't won the world cup yet but we did win the Euro Cup and apart from Brazil and Argentina the best Soccer countries in the world are from Europe..

I see, I'm not sure what to believe since I don't follow gay sports. I'm American by birth, so naturally I don't follow European "sports"


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