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Jeb Stuart Thurmond 04-11-2012 10:32 PM

Needed: new 10% tax to fund Christianity. Also, conscription
 
Biblical Law calls for True Christian™ churches to be funded with a 10% income tax (Genesis 28:22). Also, we get to draft your firstborn child: (Exodus 13:12-13) This is not an optional donation, God states clearly that failure to pay this tax is a crime:

Malachi 3:8 Will a man rob God? Yet ye have robbed me. But ye say, Wherein have we robbed thee? In tithes and offerings.

This will be a flat tax, except for the poor, who are to give everything: Mark 12:41-44.

This doesn't mean that income taxes actually have to rise 10%. This is an entirely different system, there are no loopholes whatsoever: one tenth of your stuff, now, until we have 10% of the US GDP (about 1 and a half trillion dollars). If you don't want to see your tax bill rise, just cut a trillion and a half from the rest of government. Here's a chart of where federal money goes, I'm sure you can plenty of things that can be removed:

http://www.peaceactioncleveland.org/...ending2011.png

So where will this one and a half trillion dollar tax go? In the long run, back to you, times 100: (Matthew 19:29, Mark 10:31, Matthew 13:23) Tell me, what investment opportunity can promise such a return on investment, believably? Yes, I know every scam makes promises like this, but how many real ones? Clearly this is the best investment opportunity of all times.

Once we start collecting the tithe worldwide, it will raise $6.312 Trillion dollars, (10% of the world's GDP). So, what are we to spend that money on?

Church renovations seems like a good place to start. God tells us how a church is supposed to look: this is why the Bible tells us about the temple of Solomon in such detail. 1 Kings 7:48 tells us to put lots of gold in our churches. They should be renovated to have swimming pools, at 136 cubic meters or more: 2 Chr. 4:5–6) Some more things on God's wish-list: Its walls were lined with cedar, on which were carved figures of cherubim, palm-trees, and open flowers, which were overlaid with gold. Chains of gold further marked it off from the Holy of Holies. The floor of the Temple was of fir-wood overlaid with gold. The door-posts, of olive-wood, supported folding-doors of fir. The doors of the Holy of Holies were of olive-wood. On both sets of doors were carved cherubim, palm-trees, and flowers, all being overlaid with gold (1 Kings 6:15 et seq.)

Once the renovations are done, it's time to ask "What Would Jesus Do"? Well, Jesus had expensive tastes, see the Annointing of Jesus in Matthew 26, Mark 14, Luke 7, and John 12.

The anointing of Jesus is an event reported by each of the Canonical gospels, in which a woman pours the entire contents of an alabastron of very expensive perfume over the head (according to Mark and Matthew) or feet (according to John and Luke) of Jesus. The anointing angers some of the onlookers because the perfume could have been sold for a year's wages—which the Gospel of Mark enumerates as 300 denarii—and the money given to the poor.

And of course, now that we can afford it, it's time to go back to the optional but still much-loved (by God) practise of animal sacrifice. See how it works in Leviticus.

Any other ideas on how to spend 6 trillion dollars every year?

Bobby-Joe 04-11-2012 10:35 PM

Re: Needed: new 10% tax to fund Christianity. Also, conscription
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Jeb Thurmond (Post 870142)
Any other ideas on how to spend 6 trillion dollars every year?

Horse farms to provide Missouri Foxtrotting horses to virtuous Christian job creators. After all Christian job creators deserve some fun for making tithing so much to Baby Jesus.

Fleur-de-lis 04-12-2012 01:01 AM

Re: Needed: new 10% tax to fund Christianity. Also, conscription
 
I'll just keep my money, thanks.

Billy Bob Jenkins 04-12-2012 01:16 AM

Re: Needed: new 10% tax to fund Christianity. Also, conscription
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Fleur-de-lis (Post 870207)
I'll just keep my money, thanks.

That money will be of no use to you in Hell. If I were you, I would hedge my bets and believe in His Temporary Sacrifice and meet the conditions necessary to receive His Unconditional Love. Why do you reject forgiveness?

Fleur-de-lis 04-12-2012 01:19 AM

Re: Needed: new 10% tax to fund Christianity. Also, conscription
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Billy Bob Jenkins (Post 870212)
That money will be of no use to you in Hell. If I were you, I would hedge my bets and believe in His Temporary Sacrifice and meet the conditions necessary to receive His Unconditional Love. Why do you reject forgiveness?

I haven no need of forgiveness from someone who has been dead over 2000 years.

Didymus Much 04-12-2012 01:29 AM

Re: Needed: new 10% tax to fund Christianity. Also, conscription
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Fleur-de-lis (Post 870213)
I haven no need of forgiveness from someone who has been dead over 2000 years.

Jesus died in 36 AD. 2012 - 36 = 1976 years. Math fail.

Jesus rose after 3 days, therefore He's not dead (according to the Bible, which is the standard of proof on this Baptist Church's forum). Logic fail.

Rev. M. Rodimer 04-12-2012 03:41 AM

Re: Needed: new 10% tax to fund Christianity. Also, conscription
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Didymus Much (Post 870214)
Jesus died in 36 AD. 2012 - 36 = 1976 years. Math fail.

Jesus rose after 3 days, therefore He's not dead (according to the Bible, which is the standard of proof on this Baptist Church's forum). Logic fail.

You sure are starting to sound like a believer, bub!

I'm praying for you . . . :pray2: I'm sure the Lord would be overjoyed to have an "intellectual gorilla" like you working for Him!

Redeemed Papist 04-12-2012 01:22 PM

Re: Needed: new 10% tax to fund Christianity. Also, conscription
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Fleur-de-lis (Post 870213)
I haven no need of forgiveness from someone who has been dead over 2000 years.

Jesus is alive and in Heaven being God again. He was only dead for 3 days. One day any time now He will come back with a big can of whoop ass for people like you while we smile and greet Him. Try to keep up.

Boring Johnson 04-12-2012 01:44 PM

Re: Needed: new 10% tax to fund Christianity. Also, conscription
 
I think that all the money should go to Africa to help them and give them clean water and food they can eat and medicine so babies and mother and fathers don't die

Redeemed Papist 04-12-2012 01:46 PM

Re: Needed: new 10% tax to fund Christianity. Also, conscription
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Boris Johnson (Post 870387)
I think that all the money should go to Africa to help them and give them clean water and food they can eat and medicine so babies and mother and fathers don't die

That's nice. Got any scripture to say that God cares if heathens die?

Trent Harvey, Jr. 04-12-2012 06:16 PM

Re: Needed: new 10% tax to fund Christianity. Also, conscription
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Boris Johnson (Post 870387)
I think that all the money should go to Africa to help them and give them clean water and food they can eat and medicine so babies and mother and fathers don't die

They will die anyway. Violently, because it is God's Will:

Ethiopia (old term for most of Africa), and Libya, and Lydia, and all the mingled people, and Chub, and the men of the land that is in league, (i.e. people who send money to them) shall fall with them by the sword. - Ezekiel 30:5

Why make a futile attempt to thwart God's Will?

Bobby-Joe 04-12-2012 07:27 PM

Re: Needed: new 10% tax to fund Christianity. Also, conscription
 
We also need reward proper ladies who CHOSE not to coldly abandon their children to chase after some career like some Femnazi and instead stay at home and act like a proper mother and not a trashy slut with an appliance strapped to her hips. A tithing reduction for their husbands should be appropriator. Easily make up on the tithes of family who CHOSE to let their wives pretend to be men.

Jeb Stuart Thurmond 05-03-2012 11:22 PM

Re: Needed: new 10% tax to fund Christianity. Also, conscription
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Jeb Thurmond (Post 870142)
1 Kings 7:48 tells us to put lots of gold in our churches. They should be renovated to have swimming pools, at 136 cubic meters or more: 2 Chr. 4:56) Some more things on God's wish-list: Its walls were lined with cedar, on which were carved figures of cherubim, palm-trees, and open flowers, which were overlaid with gold. Chains of gold further marked it off from the Holy of Holies. The floor of the Temple was of fir-wood overlaid with gold. The door-posts, of olive-wood, supported folding-doors of fir. The doors of the Holy of Holies were of olive-wood. On both sets of doors were carved cherubim, palm-trees, and flowers, all being overlaid with gold (1 Kings 6:15 et seq.)

God loves bling. It's humiliating to see the Catholics and Orthodox outdoing us in this department, it's just like Jihad-envy. If only the liberals would stop persecuting us, our churches could look like this:

http://media.englishrussia.com/11201...tory001-27.jpg
http://media.englishrussia.com/11201...tory001-25.jpg

James Hutchins 05-09-2012 01:29 PM

Re: Needed: new 10% tax to fund Christianity. Also, conscription
 
I am behind this 100%. I think all the heathens and non-Christians should be taxed at least 10%.

Mungwatt 06-09-2012 02:15 PM

Re: Needed: new 10% tax to fund Christianity. Also, conscription
 
I sure like that Heretic Fork! Do you know where to get one? I want to use it to shut up my brother in law.

Jeb Stuart Thurmond 11-03-2013 09:22 PM

Re: Needed: new 10% tax to fund Christianity. Also, conscription
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Mungwatt (Post 894065)
I sure like that Heretic Fork!

Sure, why not, we'll give you two. But you have to think bigger: we've got 6 trillion dollars to spend!

We WILL have it, anyway, once Biblical Law is enacted.

jerbear 11-09-2013 11:39 PM

Re: Needed: new 10% tax to fund Christianity. Also, conscription
 
If we did tax out, you would think we could take it from military spending. The reason is, cause god helps protect us, however (2 Corinthians 9:7 - Every man according as he purposeth in his heart, [so let him give]; not grudgingly, or of necessity: for God loveth a cheerful giver.) Every one must give in order to see the blessing in all areas, and he must be happy when they do take it. Or they loose their blessings.

Tithing will fix everything. Malichi 3:10 "Bring ye all the tithes into the storehouse, that there may be meat in mine house, and prove me now herewith, saith the Lord of hosts, if I will not open you the windows of heaven, and pour you out a blessing, that there shall not be room enough to receive it."

MartinLutherLover 11-10-2013 08:32 AM

Re: Needed: new 10% tax to fund Christianity. Also, conscription
 
Still not sure why "science" or the military get so much funding. I say, cut out science funding. That's 2%. Then take the other 8% from the military since they really won't miss such a small figure from a whopping 52%.

Thomas Taylor 11-11-2013 01:13 PM

Re: Needed: new 10% tax to fund Christianity. Also, conscription
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by jerbear (Post 1040145)
If we did tax out, you would think we could take it from military spending. The reason is, cause god helps protect us, however (2 Corinthians 9:7 - Every man according as he purposeth in his heart, [so let him give]; not grudgingly, or of necessity: for God loveth a cheerful giver.) Every one must give in order to see the blessing in all areas, and he must be happy when they do take it. Or they loose their blessings.

Tithing will fix everything. Malichi 3:10 "Bring ye all the tithes into the storehouse, that there may be meat in mine house, and prove me now herewith, saith the Lord of hosts, if I will not open you the windows of heaven, and pour you out a blessing, that there shall not be room enough to receive it."

What, and make ourselves weak. We need to make the military stronger, if anything. The money should be taken from welfare and healthcare.

PokermonFan1994 11-25-2013 09:17 PM

Re: Needed: new 10% tax to fund Christianity. Also, conscription
 
And again, church stealing money from people to make their cult stronger, and people is stupid enough to pay them. I'm happy because I never give money to any of those stupid church over here, I prefer to use it to help people or animals. God doesn't need money, people does


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