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-   -   My wife bought me one of those stupid little chocolate bunnies last year (http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=97595)

Elijah Mee, PhD 03-09-2014 10:24 PM

My wife bought me one of those stupid little chocolate bunnies last year
 
I think she was feeling a little superior that she'd bought me an Easter present and I'd got her nothing (it's not about me or her, it's about Jesus). Anyway, I smashed it in her smug little face. She still ate it though.

What unwanted Easter presents have you received in the past, friends?

Aaliyah 03-09-2014 11:15 PM

Re: My wife bought me one of those stupid little chocolate bunnies last year
 
Unfortunately as I've spent all of my life up until now as a Jew, I've not celebrated Easter at all for I have failed until now to recognize Jesus Christ as the Son of God and our Savior. However, I will say that I attended church for the first time today and had a very long talk with the Pastor. It was long and I shouldn't go into too much detail (women are known for talking too much), but he was happy to hear that I am willing to convert, if a bit skeptical at first. He said that were I to attend church often and regularly and prove my faith a bit more, he would be willing to baptize me.

I just hope I can be baptized before Easter!

Mother Of Seven 03-10-2014 01:05 AM

Re: My wife bought me one of those stupid little chocolate bunnies last year
 
I don't care if I'm given a chocolate rabbit. After all, it's just chocolate, and I like chocolate. But they will never get anything in return.


It a pagan thing these rabbits and eggs. Fertility or something. And what has fertility to do with Easter?
We Christian women don't need fertility in the form of witchcraft, we are fertile because the Lord made us that way.
Genesis 9:7
Quote:

And you, be ye fruitful, and multiply; bring forth abundantly in the earth, and multiply therein.
Why don't these pagans learn that they don't have to play with rabbits and eggs to become fertile? Take the Lord into their lives instead. Rabbits and eggs don't work anyway. Why would they?

Zechariah Smyth 03-10-2014 01:39 AM

Re: My wife bought me one of those stupid little chocolate bunnies last year
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Mother Of Seven (Post 1071943)
Rabbits and eggs don't work anyway. Why would they?

Some people are superstitious. They'll believe ANYTHING.

:thumbdown:

Elijah Mee, PhD 03-10-2014 02:18 AM

Re: My wife bought me one of those stupid little chocolate bunnies last year
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Aaliyah (Post 1071920)
Unfortunately as I've spent all of my life up until now as a Jew

I'm so sorry. :(

But I'm glad to hear you're on a better path now. I just hope Jesus can find it in His heart to forgive your abusive parents for bringing you up that way.

Aaliyah 03-10-2014 02:59 AM

Re: My wife bought me one of those stupid little chocolate bunnies last year
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by SeekingEnlightenment (Post 1071956)
I'm so sorry. :(

But I'm glad to hear you're on a better path now. I just hope Jesus can find it in His heart to forgive your abusive parents for bringing you up that way.

As my signature shows, which does make me blush in shame whenever I see it:

1 John 2:22 - Who is a liar but he that denieth that Jesus is the Christ? He is antichrist, that denieth the Father and the Son.
1 John 2:23 - Whosoever denieth the Son, the same hath not the Father: he that acknowledgeth the Son hath the Father also.

Furthermore Mark 16:16, He that believeth and is baptized shall be saved; but he that believeth not shall be damned.

So what matters is not whether Jesus will forgive them, but if they ask for forgiveness through Him and come to accept Him as I have. Given that my father has consented me to be here, though, there might be a spark of hope for him and my mother yet! :innocent:

Magnolia 03-10-2014 11:18 PM

Re: My wife bought me one of those stupid little chocolate bunnies last year
 
well it is just chocolate, just a friendship gift :innocent:

Freddy Osborne 03-11-2014 01:15 AM

Re: My wife bought me one of those stupid little chocolate bunnies last year
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Magnolia (Post 1072219)
well it is just chocolate, just a friendship gift :innocent:

Jesus is your friend. This is not..

Solomon T Jones 03-11-2014 02:01 AM

Re: My wife bought me one of those stupid little chocolate bunnies last year
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Magnolia (Post 1072219)
well it is just chocolate, just a friendship gift :innocent:

Careful, not too long ago I remember people were saying "it's just a pumpkin" but fast forward a few decades and now all manner of witchcraft and blasphemy is celebrated on our streets each year.

Pagan cults have always wanted to hijack and pervert Christmas and Easter too. With Christmas they invented the idol "Santa Claus", a symbol of Greed. With Easter they invented the idol "Easter Bunny" with it's succulent chocolate eggs, a symbol of Gluttony mocking Lent. A rabbit laying chocolate eggs is a perversion of the natural order as the Bible makes it clear that rabbit kind will only beget rabbit kind and not chocolate kind. I have also read a theory that a rabbit laying a chocolate egg is a symbolic mockery of the resurrection, although personally I think that link is tenuous.

Aaliyah 03-11-2014 03:49 AM

Re: My wife bought me one of those stupid little chocolate bunnies last year
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Solomon T Jones (Post 1072250)
Careful, not too long ago I remember people were saying "it's just a pumpkin" but fast forward a few decades and now all manner of witchcraft and blasphemy is celebrated on our streets each year.

Pagan cults have always wanted to hijack and pervert Christmas and Easter too. With Christmas they invented the idol "Santa Claus", a symbol of Greed. With Easter they invented the idol "Easter Bunny" with it's succulent chocolate eggs, a symbol of Gluttony mocking Lent. A rabbit laying chocolate eggs is a perversion of the natural order as the Bible makes it clear that rabbit kind will only beget rabbit kind and not chocolate kind. I have also read a theory that a rabbit laying a chocolate egg is a symbolic mockery of the resurrection, although personally I think that link is tenuous.

This post implies that Lent shouldn't be mocked. Of course it should be, like everything else that's catlick in nature. That doesn't mean we shouldn't call the mocker evil either. They're both against God.

Elijah Mee, PhD 03-14-2014 12:48 PM

Re: My wife bought me one of those stupid little chocolate bunnies last year
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Aaliyah (Post 1072268)
This post implies that Lent shouldn't be mocked. Of course it should be, like everything else that's catlick in nature. That doesn't mean we shouldn't call the mocker evil either. They're both against God.

Just wanted to say congratulations on breaking free of the hellbound epithet of "Unsaved Trash". I'm confident that this year you'll celebrating Christmas instead of Hanukkah! The way God wants it to be! :thumbsup:

Chewer 03-15-2014 06:01 AM

Re: My wife bought me one of those stupid little chocolate bunnies last year
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Elijah Mee, PhD (Post 1071915)
I think she was feeling a little superior that she'd bought me an Easter present and I'd got her nothing (it's not about me or her, it's about Jesus). Anyway, I smashed it in her smug little face. She still ate it though.

What unwanted Easter presents have you received in the past, friends?

Sorry to hear about the sinful bunny present Sir. My wife once had the audacity to give me those heart shaped antacid that taste like chalk. As if it was valentines day! (Even if was valentines day thats just an excuse for people to lust! Should not be celebrated. Matthew 5:28, Exodus 20:14). I got out my shotgun took them into the backyard, and blew them into a million pieces with my 12 gauge that was filled with the Glory of God. I promptly beat my wife afterwards.

TheChristian 03-17-2014 12:46 AM

Re: My wife bought me one of those stupid little chocolate bunnies last year
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Elijah Mee, PhD (Post 1071915)
I think she was feeling a little superior that she'd bought me an Easter present and I'd got her nothing (it's not about me or her, it's about Jesus). Anyway, I smashed it in her smug little face. She still ate it though.

What unwanted Easter presents have you received in the past, friends?

Ohoh in my land she would smash your face and you would eat it B)

Zechariah Smyth 03-17-2014 01:07 AM

Re: My wife bought me one of those stupid little chocolate bunnies last year
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by TheChristian (Post 1073954)
Ohoh in my land she would smash your face and you would eat it B)

Maybe because in your land (France? Spain?) men are henpecked sissies.

:lol:

Where is your introduction thread?

Yours in Christ.

Z. Smyth

Chewer 03-17-2014 01:09 AM

Re: My wife bought me one of those stupid little chocolate bunnies last year
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by TheChristian (Post 1073954)
Ohoh in my land she would smash your face and you would eat it B)

In our land of AMERICA! If a woman tried to do that she'd get beaten to near death, and locked in a prayer closet without food or water.

TheChristian 03-17-2014 01:19 AM

Re: My wife bought me one of those stupid little chocolate bunnies last year
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Dipper Man (Post 1073961)
In our land of AMERICA! If a woman tried to do that she'd get beaten to near death, and locked in a prayer closet without food or water.

In your land america, husbands get arrested by beating women, here it is rare to happen, and I am not from spain or france. And in america most of you are fat and have tiny dicks.

Zechariah Smyth: I already made intro, so you search for it lazy ass

Chewer 03-17-2014 05:00 AM

Re: My wife bought me one of those stupid little chocolate bunnies last year
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by TheChristian (Post 1073966)
In your land america, husbands get arrested by beating women, here it is rare to happen, and I am not from spain or france. And in america most of you are fat and have tiny dicks.

Zechariah Smyth: I already made intro, so you search for it lazy ass

Ephesians 4:29 "Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers."

No need for the harsh language sonny. Haha. We only get arrested if one of Obamas secret spies is patrolling around. Boy i'll have you know that gluttony is a sin, and I do not commit sins. At least I try my very hardest not to, and when I do I pray to Jesus for forgiveness.

Proverbs 23:21 "For the drunkard and the glutton shall come to poverty: and drowsiness shall clothe a man with rags."

I bet a million dollars your a frenchy. You sure do sound like one of em.


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