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Old 03-18-2014, 11:58 PM
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Mary Etheldreda Mary Etheldreda is offline
Gushing for Jesus
 

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Join Date: Sep 2011
Posts: 13,867
Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Should a True Christian Date a Dwarf?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Naomi Ruth Lamb View Post
Not that I would necessarily consider it personally,
No dear, of course not. No one ever thought such a vile thing about you.



Quote:
Originally Posted by Naomi Ruth Lamb View Post
but should I - um - someone - date a vertically challenged man?
No.

Let me explain.

1.) Ew
2.) Uh, no.

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Originally Posted by Naomi Ruth Lamb View Post
Let's say this dwarf is striving to find JESUS? Let's say that he could be healed like our darling Midge?
One can tell the tree by it's fruit, not by what its fruit might be.

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Originally Posted by Naomi Ruth Lamb View Post
(Elijah, dear, did you get the pie I sent you?)
Actually, he won't stop talking about it.



Quote:
Originally Posted by Naomi Ruth Lamb View Post
Surely the um, friend - for whom I write this will find someone else soon. Surely the LORD won't see fit to make her an OLD MAID and DIE ALONE, LOVELESS, and FRUSTRATED. Surely JESUS cares enough to listen to her PRAYERS - hello, Lord - are you there? But it would be good to have an answer just in case.
The True Christian™ woman will recall that Sarah was barren and ancient, withered and saggy and smelling like Old Lady when the LORD saw to it that Adam's seed would find bountiful harvest in her otherwise dried up old womb (Genesis 21:2). Surely the True Christian™ woman would do no less than to pray and wait in faithful anticipation, without stooping (ahem) to such pathetic measures like dating a midget.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Naomi Ruth Lamb View Post
Praise God, from whom ALL blessings flow (Here I am, Lord!)
NRL
Amen, dear! THAT's the spirit! Perhaps the LORD is calling you to a different ministry: Hot Women: Dating to Save People from Hell

Quote:
Christian Dating Tips for Effective Missionary Dating
1. If he tells your that you are hot...
Tell him God made you hot.
2. If he wants to hold your hand...
Give him a Bible.
3. If he tries to get closer...
Tell him the Holy Spirit is wooing him.
4. If he asks to pay for dinner...
Remind him that Jesus also paid a debt He did not owe!
5. If he reaches his arm around you...
Tell him that nobody will ever be as close to you as Jesus is.
(or ask him if you instead could "lay hands" on him in prayer)
6. If he tries to kiss you...
Remind him that a kiss killed your Savior.
(and you're not ready to "speak in tongues")
7. If he asks to come inside...
Ask him if he has asked Jesus to come inside his heart.
8. If he tells you he loves you...
Tell him that Jesus loves him.
9. If he gets angry that you won't put out...
Clarify to him that W.W.J.D. does NOT mean "Who would Jesus Do."
10. After you dump him...
Tell him that Jesus Christ will never leave or forsake him
__________________
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Proud Quiver Full Mommy To Many

(Psalm 127:3-5)


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