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Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Freehold, Iowa
Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: How My Little Pony destroyed my daughter's marriage. - 12-31-2016, 12:26 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by handmaiden View Post
I know that the Mormons like to downplay that whole polygamy thing but it really does seem like a horny fellow using fancy language to justify his behavior.
You have to appreciate the power of smooth talking that charlatan had. Can you imagine the conversations?

Joe: Hey Henry, I know this is gonna sound, well... a bit funny. But you see, last night the Holy Ghost came to me in a vision and told me I ought to marry your Zina.

Henry: Um, Joe, you know I love you like a brother, man, but she's my wife.

Joe: Yeah, yeah [scratches head]. It's just that, well... um... it's what Heavenly Father wants, and who am I to say no?

Henry: Seriously? Joe, we've been friends a long time, man. She's my wife.

Joe: I know, Henry. But think about how now that your bed'll be empty, young Abigail who lives down the road could warm it for you, right? I mean, you and Zina have had some squabbles terrible lately. I'll take good care of her and you can raise up Abigail to be the sweet little thing you like a woman to be. You can teach her just what to do in bed if'n you know what I mean! Think about it, man! A sweet young ass like that? All yours? You can train her up just the way you like, and you won't have to listen to Zina's long, boring stories any more? C'mon! Heavenly Father will reward you in Heaven. I promise.

Henry: Okay, okay. You'll talk to Abigail's father?

Joe: Sure! Sure I will! No problem! It'll be worked out by week's end!

Henry: Well, if Heavenly Father wants it...

Joe: He does!

Henry: Well, okay.

Joe: Great! Hey, when you send Zizi over, have her wear that saucy little number that makes her ass look like it's got its own wagon train under that bustle. Yeah! That'll do. Mmm-MMM! Okay, see you later!
Henry: 0.o


Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

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