[Ezekiel Bathfire]

There seems to be some mistake here, it was nephew Zebulun, Sister SUV and I who conducted the experiments. The team of cutting-edge groundbreakers were thus all True Christians.

Nevertheless, our experiments with cats have encountered a set back: following the publication of the results, we found it increasingly difficult to obtain supplies of cats. Zebulun had to return fire when being pursued from Miss Hortensia Grebe’s Home for Distressed Cats after trying to adopt 50 of the beasts.

We now have embarked on an intensive breeding program for our own cats. This has also proven more difficult than expected as it turns out that the only two strays we could find were both female and show no signs of reproducing.

This is all a great pity as we have been ready to go in reproducing an experiment in which it is claimed that Habanero Chillis are anesthetics. The idea is to poke the cats in the eye with cut chillis and then stick a needle in to the same eye to see if they suffer any pain.

We did trap obtain possession of a third female and did the experiment (see picture below), but the result was hardly worth publishing. You see, for rigorous Biblical Science (BS) the good scientist will need at least 3 cats.

You know, I sometimes have a little feeling of compassion for these poor creatures who go through so much in the cause of demonstrating secular science. BS animals are much better off and we have a wonderful experiment in the pipeline, it involves the fiery furnace of Daniel:

Da:3:19: Then was Nebuchadnezzar full of fury, and the form of his visage was changed against Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego: therefore he spake, and commanded that they should heat the furnace one seven times more than it was wont to be heated.
Da:3:20: And he commanded the most mighty men that were in his army to bind Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego, and to cast them into the burning fiery furnace.
Da:3:21: Then these men were bound in their coats, their hosen, and their hats, and their other garments, and were cast into the midst of the burning fiery furnace.
Da:3:22: Therefore because the king's commandment was urgent, and the furnace exceeding hot, the flame of the fire slew those men that took up Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego.
Da:3:23: And these three men, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego, fell down bound into the midst of the burning fiery furnace.
Da:3:24: Then Nebuchadnezzar the king was astonied, and rose up in haste, and spake, and said unto his counsellers, Did not we cast three men bound into the midst of the fire? They answered and said unto the king, True, O king.
Da:3:25: He answered and said, Lo, I see four men loose, walking in the midst of the fire, and they have no hurt; and the form of the fourth is like the Son of God.
Da:3:26: Then Nebuchadnezzar came near to the mouth of the burning fiery furnace, and spake, and said, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego, ye servants of the most high God, come forth, and come hither. Then Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego, came forth of the midst of the fire.

More or less any animal will do for this and it appears that the pandas of Landover Vivisection Supply Company and Zoo are over-breeding again and this will give us a supply for throwing in the furnace supplied for heating Landover golf course*.

Oh, and don’t worry, we will shave them first so as to make it as life-like as possible.

*That reminds me, the 9th radiator at the 14th green is leaking, perhaps a boy could be sent up to fix it.