Mr. Mayor,
Things are indeed
worrisome and
alarming. Many hypothetical whereabouts of our sweet
Pastor Ezekiel must be carefully considered, including the possibility that he's been
Raptured, which would not be totally surprising, as he is
the most perfect and immaculate human being on Earth at the moment - or
in Heaven in case he actually
was Raptured. While this development would be extremely good news to
Jesus, as they could plan for the Events for the
End of Times in a more
intimate relationship, it would make the Work of Spreading the Gospel even harder for
us who still have to abide this Rotten Earth in expectation of
Eternity. Zeke is (or
was in case he
ware Raptured)
the best of the best. His love towards everyone, even his Filipino houseboys, was unprecedented.
Philemon 1:7
For we have great joy and consolation in thy love, because the bowels of the saints are refreshed by thee, brother.
Thus, our
Rapture Preparation Committee now participates in the
Missing Children Milk Carton Program and the following image will be available
nationwide in all supermarkets and dairy product outlets. We're expecting
positive results within the hour!
Yours in Christ,
Elmer