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The Poetaster's Korner Tasteful poetry for JESUS but don't let the flowers fool you. NO HOMERS ALLOWED!

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  #1  
Old 01-27-2009, 01:24 AM
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Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Poems about the Gospels

Jesus came to fulfill EVERYTHING in the Old Testament
He spoke in parables to make sure people went to hell!
Jesus was so wonderful, he even had two lineages
And even though the people He grew up with did not believe
He can still send evil spirits into pigs!
Jesus will destroy your unbelievers, even worst than Sodom and Gomorrah!
He'll destroy all the people He made sure would never know the truth!
God made sure he blinded their eyes and hardened their hearts, if He hadn't they would have believed!
And afterwards God will punish them for eternity, since they didn't believe!
God will reward you if you leave your wife and families to follow Him!
Thank God only the foolish and ignorant listen to Him!
Never those people with whom He grew up with!
If you believe and are baptised, you won't be damned for all time!
You have to hate your entire family, and yourself!
Jesus will give you a big reward when you abandon your children!
Whatever men like, you can be sure God hates!
And then the Jews killed Him, and we can blame all their descendants for that crime!
So as Jesus taught, slay all those who do not obey God!
Everyone will hate us, and kill us, but we'll never be harmed!
And he'll return, before this generation passes away!
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  #2  
Old 01-27-2009, 01:48 AM
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Pastor Billy-Reuben will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Billy-Reuben will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Billy-Reuben will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Billy-Reuben will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Billy-Reuben will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Billy-Reuben will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Billy-Reuben will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Billy-Reuben will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Billy-Reuben will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Billy-Reuben will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Billy-Reuben will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: A Poem about the Gospels

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Upon request I will cite scripture for all these facts in God's Holy Word.

✝ This is a Christian community and we worship GOD of the Holy bible, the only Living GOD. We worship Jesus Christ, Son of GOD and Savior. Anything else is absurd. ✝
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  #3  
Old 01-27-2009, 02:26 AM
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Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: A Poem about the Gospels

A Poem Based on Job

Satan walks up and down the earth, before going to the meeting in Heaven
God lets Satan punish the best person, and leaves all the sinners be!
To punish Job, God kills all of his children!
And every square inch of his body is covered with boils!
But Job won't curse God, because he knows if he did, he'd die instantaneously!
Instead he curses the day he was born
And accuses God of cursing Him for no reason!
God will laugh at the trial of the innocent!
Amen!
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  #4  
Old 01-27-2009, 02:27 AM
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Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: A Poem about the Gospels

AMEN!! The Holy Ghost is strong in you today!!
__________________
Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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  #5  
Old 01-27-2009, 03:01 AM
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Heathen_Basher Heathen_Basher is offline
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Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: A Poem about the Gospels

A Poem Based On Proverbs

Write truth upon thine heart!
Always have fun with your wife's breasts!
Make love with her all night long!
If you make a problem in your house, you'll inherit nothing.
Only the simple believe EVERY word
And a soft answer turneth away wrath.
Gray hair is glorious!
Don't take pleasure in your enemies falling!
Don't seek revenge!
Don't boast about yourself!
Give lots of alcohol to poor people, so they'll forget their problems!

God laughs at your misfortunes, mocks your fears, and ignores your cries for help!
Watch out for those strange, brawling, angry, contentious, adulterous, odious women!
Foolish women drag innocent men into hell!
Beautiful women without discretion are like pigs with jewelery!
Beat your children!
The bruises and scrapes will take away the evil!
The wicked shall be a ransom for the righteous!
Don't give your slaves lectures! Beat them as if they're your own!
If you do not respect your parents, birds will eat your eyes!
Amen!
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  #6  
Old 01-27-2009, 03:09 AM
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Heathen_Basher Heathen_Basher is offline
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Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: A Poem about the Gospels

A Poem Based On Esther

Queen Vashti did not want to get naked in front of her husband's friends
So he stripped her of the crown!
The King made sure all wives were obedient!
All the beautiful virgins were brought before the King, one to be the new Queen!
And Esther won!
To take away her feminine dirt, for twelve months she is purified!
She gets two men executed!
And the Hamam and his ten sons, too!
Amen!
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  #7  
Old 01-27-2009, 04:21 AM
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Ahimaaz Smith is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Ahimaaz Smith is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Ahimaaz Smith is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Ahimaaz Smith is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Ahimaaz Smith is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Ahimaaz Smith is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Ahimaaz Smith is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Ahimaaz Smith is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Ahimaaz Smith is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Ahimaaz Smith is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Ahimaaz Smith is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.
Default Re: A Poem about the Gospels

That's about the most beautiful poem about Queen Vashti that I've ever read.
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Old 01-29-2009, 04:43 AM
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Mistress Cookie will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mistress Cookie will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mistress Cookie will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mistress Cookie will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mistress Cookie will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mistress Cookie will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mistress Cookie will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mistress Cookie will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mistress Cookie will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mistress Cookie will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mistress Cookie will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: A Poem about the Gospels

Quote:
Originally Posted by Heathen_Basher View Post
Jesus came to fulfill EVERYTHING in the Old Testament / He spoke in parables to make sure people went to hell! / etc.
Your work is deeply stirring!

It's as if the Lord were directly channeling His mighty words through YOU, Himself, to sooth these troubled times!

Bless you, and your inspirational gift!
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  #9  
Old 01-29-2009, 06:21 AM
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Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: A Poem about the Gospels

A Poem Based On 1 Chronicles

Shame be on Uzza, who dared touch the ark, rather than let it fall to the ground. Thank you God for killing him!
Praise be to David, who tortured the citizens of the cities of Ammon with saws, harrows of iron, and axes!
Shame on David, though, for trying to take a census! Praise to God, for justly punishing this crime by killing 70,000 of His Chosen People!
Glory to God, who repented of this act afterward!
Amen!
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  #10  
Old 01-29-2009, 06:31 AM
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Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: A Poem about the Gospels

A Poem Based On Lamentations

Oh Jerusalem, you are like a woman who sighs and turns backwards, filthiness is in your skirts!
The adversary puts his hand on her pleasant things!
God squishes mighty men, young men, and virgins, as if they were grapes!
Jerusalem is as disgusting as a menstruating woman!
Mercilessly God kills everyone, young and old, and forces mothers to eat their children!
To accomplish His fury on Israel He starves children to death and makes their mothers eat their corpses!
Amen!
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Old 01-29-2009, 07:26 AM
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Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: A Poem about the Gospels

A Poem Based On 2 Kings

Oh good ol' Elijah proved himself a man of God, when he burned at the stake 102 men,
Elisha did the same when he made his servant and his descendants to be lepers for all time!
Elisha could even make heavy things float!
And God answered Elisha's prayers, he blinded all his enemies!
The plague God sent even got mother's boiling their kids to eat!
He sends a famine on the people that lasts seven years!
Whoever urinates against a wall God shall destroy!
Be not like Jezebel ladies, do not try to gain authority, for you will be thrown off a wall and fed to dogs!
All 70 of Ahab's sons were killed, and their heads placed in baskets!
Remember Jehu, who killed everyone in Samaria to show his zeal for the Lord!
Great was the reward Jehu received from God!
Be not like evil King Azariah, who God smote with leprosy!
Be like King Ahaz, who at age 36 had a son aged 25!
Be not like the Samarians, who knew not the manner of the God of the land, for they were devoured by lions!
Be not like they who eat their own dung and drink their own piss!
Be not, or else you will wake up and realize you are dead, like the 185,000 the Angel of the Lord killed!
Be like mighty Isaiah, who by the grace of God moved the sun back ten degrees!
Praise to the Lord, who will bring such evil on Jerusalem and Judah, that if you heard about it, your ears would tingle!
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  #12  
Old 01-29-2009, 07:40 AM
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Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Heathen_Basher will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: A Poem about the Gospels

A Poem Based On Daniel

When wicked King Nebuchadnezzar saw the light, he ordered all blasphemers be cut to pieces and live in dung holes! Glory!
And Daniel beheld the whole world from a top a tree!
Nebuchadnezzar eats grass, grows hair like eagle feathers and nails like bird claws!
And a detached hand writes on a wall!
The day is saved when the King orders Daniel's accusers, and their families, be thrown to the lions!
Hallelujah!
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  #13  
Old 02-02-2009, 09:32 PM
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Heathen_Basher Heathen_Basher is offline
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Default Re: A Poem about the Gospels

A Poem Based On 2 Samuel

Oh Blessed Book
That God did inspire to lessen my work!
No poem need I toil over for thee
For I have already written poems on Chronicles
And it's basically the same thing.
AMEN!
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  #14  
Old 02-02-2009, 09:41 PM
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Mistress Cookie Mistress Cookie is offline
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Default Re: A Poem about the Gospels

Can you write something about Jezebel, please?

It be shameful, I know, but I've always found her rather interesting.
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  #15  
Old 02-02-2009, 09:46 PM
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Default Re: A Poem about the Gospels

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mistress Cookie View Post
Can you write something about Jezebel, please?

It be shameful, I know, but I've always found her rather interesting.
I did mention Jezebel in my poem on 2 Kings, but since you requested so nicely sister, I shall write a poem all about her just for you!
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  #16  
Old 02-02-2009, 09:44 PM
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Default Re: A Poem about the Gospels

A Poem Based On Joel

The Day of the Lord cometh, it is nigh at hand, wrote Joel some 2,400 years ago.
God shall make Israel pay for the damage caused by the locusts He sent, and all shall praise the name of the Lord!
The sun shall be turned into darkness, and the moon into blood!
God will sell your sons and daughters!
Turn your farming equipment into weapons!
Amen!
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  #17  
Old 05-22-2010, 04:44 PM
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Benedict A. Davis Benedict A. Davis is offline
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Default Re: Poems about the Gospels

I know it is a bit homerish but I submit a haiku to add to the poetry.

He said: it’s written
man lives not on bread alone
but on words from God


matthew 4-4
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1 Chronicles 16:15
Be ye mindful always of his covenant; the word which he commanded to a thousand generations ... an everlasting covenant.
Proverbs 30:5,6: Every word of God is pure: he is a shield unto them that put their trust in him.
Add thou not unto his words, lest he reprove thee, and thou be found a liar.

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