The Landover Baptist Church
Like us or burn

Go Back   The Landover Baptist Church Forum > Church Forums > Straight 4 Jesus! (Back Door Christians)

Straight 4 Jesus! (Back Door Christians) At LBC, we will cure your perversion of choice (even if we have to stone you).

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 03-19-2014, 01:57 AM
Ex-Viking's Avatar
Ex-Viking Ex-Viking is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™

Honorary Ex-Eskimo True Christian™ Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Friend of Jesus Persecuted Porn Resistant Guns, Guts and GLORY! One Year/1000 posts Touched by Jesus Saved 1 Year Public Awareness Medal TC Bravery Pro-Life Christian Love 

Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Freehold, Iowa
Posts: 1,692
Ex-Viking is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Ex-Viking is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Ex-Viking is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Ex-Viking is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Ex-Viking is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Ex-Viking is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Ex-Viking is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Ex-Viking is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Ex-Viking is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Ex-Viking is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Ex-Viking is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.
Default God tears homo wrestlers' anus

Watch here how the wrestler Sean Waltman, all dressed up in his usual gay S&M latex gear ready for another homo-erotic match, gets his anus ripped open. How is there any natural explanation to this? That has not happened to anyone else doing the same trick, and as far as I know you don't tear your anus by just sitting down.

There is only one answer, and that is that God got tired of him and teared his anus open, most likely as a warning to other people who might engage in the queer sport of wrestling.



http://www.tmz.com/2013/03/26/wwe-x-pac-anus-video/
Quote:
Anus-Ripping Nearly Killed Me

Former WWE star X-Pac tells TMZ ... he lost so much blood after tearing his anus apart during a wrestling match in Minneapolis last weekend ... he nearly died.

Pac -- real name Sean Waltman -- says he didn't notice the blood at first ... and even finished the match ... but during the after-party he felt something was really wrong. Pac says he went to the bathroom and discovered an enormous pool of blood in his singlet.

That's when Pac called himself an ambulance.

As we reported, Pac underwent butthole surgery that night ... and was released Monday morning. FYI, the procedure is called a sphincteroplasty (WARNING: Do not Google).

We've obtained video of the accident ... you see Pac flying anus-first into the steel turnbuckle ... the footage of the accident from RFvideo.com is pretty brutal.

As for going #2 ... Pac says it's business as usual, but he was given special instructions by his doctor on how to clean his wound after pooping.

Enjoy your breakfast.
__________________
"Abnormal, a horrible cancerous tumor in the body of society, homosexuals are perverts, whose sexual drive the Devil has used as his strongest weapon against God. A person cannot be a Christian and a homosexual at the same time, homosexuality is chosen, not inborn, and everybody can be set free and delivered."

- Pastor Ake Green
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 03-19-2014, 02:17 AM
Mary Etheldreda's Avatar
Mary Etheldreda Mary Etheldreda is online now
Gushing for Jesus
 

Protected by JESUS Christian Love Heaven Bound Ready for the Rapture Cleanest Kitchen Ex-Mary Worshipper True Christian™ Real American™ True Christian Caucasian Persecuted Pro-Life Most Obedient Friend of Jesus True Christian Homemaker True Christian Beauty 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College True Republican Mother of 1 boy or 2.5 girls Quiverful Mother of 2 boys or 5 girls Super Soaker Baptism Award 3rd Year Bible College One Year/1000 posts True Christian Lady Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Tomato Staker Hatchet Child Rearing Award Kirk Cameron Fan Club Saved 1 Year Prayer Warrior The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking The Hatchet Child Rearing Award 4th Year Bible College Paula Deen Negro Support Group TC Bravery Touched by Jesus Heart of compassion 

Join Date: Sep 2011
Posts: 12,379
Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: God tears homo wrestlers' anus

I'm not surprised. It's a miracle the LORD hasn't smote these ungodly wrestles long ago for constantly using their bungholes for things the Good Lord never intended. This woman is such a pervert, she shoves her greasy anus in the face of another woman:


And this one wrestler makes the other vomit with his toxic anus-gasses.




__________________
.



Proud Quiver Full Mommy To Many

(Psalm 127:3-5)


Open Invitation To Atheists: 5 Reasons To Join the Church: Repent, and join us today!
Reasons To Believe (1 Peter 3:15)Logical And practical answers to a common question
Autism - the New Gay: Atheists conduct a nation-wide social experiment with children - Autism.
The Truth About New Atheism: Why Atheism is a Religion, And New Atheism Is Evil
Collecting Recipes For Placenta: Fetal Bread Of Life Ladies, share your recipes here for the fetal "Bread Of Life" (John 6:35)



Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 03-19-2014, 02:53 AM
Orem Festus Jr.'s Avatar
Orem Festus Jr. Orem Festus Jr. is offline
Forum Member
Forum Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: log cabin down by the crik
Posts: 45
Orem Festus Jr. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Orem Festus Jr. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Orem Festus Jr. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Orem Festus Jr. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Orem Festus Jr. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Orem Festus Jr. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Orem Festus Jr. has bribed people to get these reputation points.
Default Re: God tears homo wrestlers' anus

Reckon wrastlin most always leads to a good solid cornholin.sure did on my first date, i reckon. Its a shame i wound up on the recievin side, seein as how Betty sue's ol brother Buck came along as one of them chaparones.Buck was a big ol sucker,and he were drunker than a ol skunk on the shine, and he sure outwrastled me, no denyin. Its okay now since i put a slug in his brainpan years later in one of them so called 'huntin accidents'. Buried the old boy out back neath the rabbit hutch.
__________________
Proverbs 23:8 The morsel which thou hast eaten shalt thou vomit up, and lose thy sweet words.
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 03-21-2014, 03:03 AM
Chewer's Avatar
Chewer Chewer is offline
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured

True Christian Artist 

Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Hell. Roasting Eternally With The Dark Lord.
Posts: 121
Chewer has got mom and a couple of family members to click the rep button.Chewer has got mom and a couple of family members to click the rep button.Chewer has got mom and a couple of family members to click the rep button.Chewer has got mom and a couple of family members to click the rep button.Chewer has got mom and a couple of family members to click the rep button.
Default Re: God tears homo wrestlers' anus

Praise Christ for ripping this mans sphincters open. Bout time these fags get taught a lesson.
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 03-21-2014, 04:04 AM
Frednekk's Avatar
Frednekk Frednekk is offline
Forum Member
Forum Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: The Bible Belt
Posts: 323
Frednekk has bribed people to get these reputation points.Frednekk has bribed people to get these reputation points.Frednekk has bribed people to get these reputation points.Frednekk has bribed people to get these reputation points.Frednekk has bribed people to get these reputation points.Frednekk has bribed people to get these reputation points.Frednekk has bribed people to get these reputation points.Frednekk has bribed people to get these reputation points.Frednekk has bribed people to get these reputation points.Frednekk has bribed people to get these reputation points.
Default Re: God tears homo wrestlers' anus

The jap wrestlers don't even try to hide it. This move is the Unagi Roll.
__________________
"He that is wounded in the stones, or hath his privy member cut off, shall not enter into the congregation of the Lord."(Deuteronomy 23:1)

Last edited by Frednekk; 04-26-2014 at 03:02 PM.
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 03-21-2014, 08:51 AM
Mother Of Seven's Avatar
Mother Of Seven Mother Of Seven is offline
True Christian™ with a quiverful
True Christian™

Quiverful True Christian™ Heaven Bound Friend of Jesus Hatchet Child Rearing Award Touched by Jesus Cleanest Kitchen Best stoning bucket True Christian Beauty One Year/1000 posts In Love With Zeke True Heterosexual™ TC Bravery 

Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: In the kitchen
Posts: 2,189
Mother Of Seven will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mother Of Seven will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mother Of Seven will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mother Of Seven will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mother Of Seven will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mother Of Seven will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mother Of Seven will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mother Of Seven will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mother Of Seven will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mother Of Seven will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mother Of Seven will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: God tears homo wrestlers' anus




Is that a woman who is the referee?
Or is a man with man boobs?
__________________

Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 03-21-2014, 02:06 PM
Frednekk's Avatar
Frednekk Frednekk is offline
Forum Member
Forum Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: The Bible Belt
Posts: 323
Frednekk has bribed people to get these reputation points.Frednekk has bribed people to get these reputation points.Frednekk has bribed people to get these reputation points.Frednekk has bribed people to get these reputation points.Frednekk has bribed people to get these reputation points.Frednekk has bribed people to get these reputation points.Frednekk has bribed people to get these reputation points.Frednekk has bribed people to get these reputation points.Frednekk has bribed people to get these reputation points.Frednekk has bribed people to get these reputation points.
Default Re: God tears homo wrestlers' anus

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mother Of Seven View Post



Is that a woman who is the referee?
Or is a man with man boobs?
__________________
"He that is wounded in the stones, or hath his privy member cut off, shall not enter into the congregation of the Lord."(Deuteronomy 23:1)
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 03-21-2014, 02:07 PM
Mary Etheldreda's Avatar
Mary Etheldreda Mary Etheldreda is online now
Gushing for Jesus
 

Protected by JESUS Christian Love Heaven Bound Ready for the Rapture Cleanest Kitchen Ex-Mary Worshipper True Christian™ Real American™ True Christian Caucasian Persecuted Pro-Life Most Obedient Friend of Jesus True Christian Homemaker True Christian Beauty 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College True Republican Mother of 1 boy or 2.5 girls Quiverful Mother of 2 boys or 5 girls Super Soaker Baptism Award 3rd Year Bible College One Year/1000 posts True Christian Lady Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Tomato Staker Hatchet Child Rearing Award Kirk Cameron Fan Club Saved 1 Year Prayer Warrior The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking The Hatchet Child Rearing Award 4th Year Bible College Paula Deen Negro Support Group TC Bravery Touched by Jesus Heart of compassion 

Join Date: Sep 2011
Posts: 12,379
Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: God tears homo wrestlers' anus

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mother Of Seven View Post



Is that a woman who is the referee?
Or is a man with man boobs?
I think it's a woman chinaman referee.
__________________
.



Proud Quiver Full Mommy To Many

(Psalm 127:3-5)


Open Invitation To Atheists: 5 Reasons To Join the Church: Repent, and join us today!
Reasons To Believe (1 Peter 3:15)Logical And practical answers to a common question
Autism - the New Gay: Atheists conduct a nation-wide social experiment with children - Autism.
The Truth About New Atheism: Why Atheism is a Religion, And New Atheism Is Evil
Collecting Recipes For Placenta: Fetal Bread Of Life Ladies, share your recipes here for the fetal "Bread Of Life" (John 6:35)



Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 03-21-2014, 08:54 PM
lukasekman's Avatar
lukasekman lukasekman is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™

Protected by JESUS Heaven Bound Ready for the Rapture True Christian™ Christian Love Real American™ Ex-Masturbator True Christian Caucasian Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Guns, Guts and GLORY! Prayer Warrior Proud Niglet Sponsorer Punched the most queers 

Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Forrest Park, Memphis
Posts: 562
lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.
Default Re: God tears homo wrestlers' anus

What we are witnessing is the Wrath of God:
Behold, with a great plague will the Lord smite thy people, and thy children, and thy wives, and all thy goods: And thou shalt have great sickness by disease of thy bowels, until thy bowels fall out by reason of the sickness day by day.
2 Chronicles 21:14-15
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Tags
god's wrath, steroid monkey dope feinds, wrestling, wrestling: fags fighting fags, wrestling: fighting for fags

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Find Additional Forums Here

The information presented here is Biblically accurate. Opinions concerning the technical difficulties, fitness requirements, safety, and ratings of self-crucifixion, flagellation, stoning, destroying enemies of GOD utterly, without mercy, and other activities inherent in Christianity are subjective and may differ from yours or others' opinions; therefore be warned that you must exercise your own judgment as to the difficulty and your ability to safely protect yourself from the inherent risks and dangers. Do not use the information provided on this site unless you are a True Christian ™ who understands and accepts the risks of participating in these activities. Landover Baptist Church makes reasonable efforts to include accurate and up to date information on this website, errors or omissions sometimes occur, therefore the information contained on here is provided "as is" and without warranties of any kind either expressed or implied. Viewing, reading, or any other use of the information contained within this web site is purely the voluntary will of the viewer or user. You, 'the viewer' or 'user' shall not hold the publisher, owner, authors or other contributors of The Jesus Experience responsible for any incidents related directly or indirectly to the Experience. Landover Baptist Church, et. al., assumes no liability or responsibility for your actions.


All times are GMT. The time now is 08:20 PM.


Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1999, 2009 all rights reserved