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The introduction forum Attention Unsaved Trash: This the ONLY subforum you can start threads in. Here is where you introduce yourself. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus.

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Default Afternoon! - 07-15-2014, 10:21 PM

Good afternoon all! Glad to be here to share this day with God's favorite church on God's favorite forum!

Name's Richie Packer, and I grow crops.

I attend the Redeeming Light Chapel a few miles from my home in Ganderson, Montana.

My favorite verse is most definitely Deuteronomy 25:11-12:
"When men strive together one with another, and the wife of the one draweth near for to deliver her husband out of the hand of him that smiteth him, and putteth forth her hand, and taketh him by the secrets: Then thou shalt cut off her hand, thine eye shall not pity her."

As for finding Jesus? Well, he's been helping my family tend to their crops since my family settled here five generations ago. In short, I was born with Him beside me.

Have a splendid day!
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Default Re: Afternoon! - 07-15-2014, 10:33 PM

Welcome to our friendly forum! I imagine you are very busy this time of year, and in the season to follow (Proverbs 10:5)! So tell us, in this these End Times and days of harsh Christian persecution, do you have trouble honoring the LORD by keeping His Commandments with regard to your farmstead? Are you surrounded by like-minded, moral, and righteous folk, or must you fend off the heathen and their ridicule and mockery (Leviticus 19:19)?


Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

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Default Re: Afternoon! - 07-15-2014, 10:35 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by HolyErrandBoy View Post
Good afternoon all! Glad to be here to share this day with God's favorite church on God's favorite forum!

Name's Richie Packer, and I grow crops.

I attend the Redeeming Light Chapel a few miles from my home in Ganderson, Montana.

My favorite verse is most definitely Deuteronomy 25:11-12:
"When men strive together one with another, and the wife of the one draweth near for to deliver her husband out of the hand of him that smiteth him, and putteth forth her hand, and taketh him by the secrets: Then thou shalt cut off her hand, thine eye shall not pity her."

As for finding Jesus? Well, he's been helping my family tend to their crops since my family settled here five generations ago. In short, I was born with Him beside me.

Have a splendid day!
Welcome, friend.

You sound like a God fearing fella. What have you done for Jesus today?

When I think about how He temporarily died on the cross to Save us from His wrath it just chokes me up: I don't think any of us can repay what He did for True Christians™, everywhere.

Why it makes me weep just thinking about all those no good heathens who vomit up Jesus' mercey all over His crying face

YIC


1 Corinthians 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

Revelation 22:15 For without are dogs, and sorcerers, and whoremongers, and murderers, and idolaters, and whosoever loveth and maketh a lie.

Leviticus 20:13 If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.
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Default Re: Afternoon! - 07-15-2014, 10:37 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda View Post
Welcome to our friendly forum! I imagine you are very busy this time of year, and in the season to follow (Proverbs 10:5)! So tell us, in this these End Times and days of harsh Christian persecution, do you have trouble honoring the LORD by keeping His Commandments with regard to your farmstead? Are you surrounded by like-minded, moral, and righteous folk, or must you fend off the heathen and their ridicule and mockery (Leviticus 19:19)?
Good to meet you Mary! Yes, we are fairly busy right now, but I still ensure I have time to connect and speak of the Lord. Thankfully, He has blessed us with a fairly quiet and remote piece of land that the liberal dogs haven't tried to turn into an urban garden of sins. Other than the occasional satanic vandals from town, we are left mostly in peace to till the soil with our hoes and till our souls with the Lord.


God is my fertilizer. Through Him, I grow stronger.
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Default Re: Afternoon! - 07-16-2014, 12:23 AM

Welcome and God bless you that you found these forums. I will keep you in prayers for a good harvest and that the liberal dogs don't come near you or your farm.


"Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands." Proverbs 14:1
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Default Re: Afternoon! - 07-16-2014, 12:31 AM

Praise Jesus and welcome to God's favorite forum. What sort of crops do you grow, friend?

If you'd like to find out more about Landover Baptist Church, please read THIS thread created especially for new posters.

If you have a question, use the "search" function before posting it. Most likely it is being discussed somewhere on this Godly forum. Please don't waste God's precious bandwidth.

You will keep a respectful tongue in your head whenever addressing your betters, which includes all True Christians™. Failure to do so, or any attempt at inciting debate or mockery of God's Divine Plan, can and will result in the suspension of your posting privileges.

Your rights on this forum are listed HERE. If you feel that any of these rights have been violated, please don't hesitate to contact a Pastor at once.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: Afternoon! - 07-16-2014, 01:22 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by lstark16 View Post
Welcome and God bless you that you found these forums. I will keep you in prayers for a good harvest and that the liberal dogs don't come near you or your farm.
Well, thank you kindly Sister. May the Lord bless you and yours.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
Praise Jesus and welcome to God's favorite forum. What sort of crops do you grow, friend?

If you'd like to find out more about Landover Baptist Church, please read THIS thread created especially for new posters.

If you have a question, use the "search" function before posting it. Most likely it is being discussed somewhere on this Godly forum. Please don't waste God's precious bandwidth.

You will keep a respectful tongue in your head whenever addressing your betters, which includes all True Christians™. Failure to do so, or any attempt at inciting debate or mockery of God's Divine Plan, can and will result in the suspension of your posting privileges.

Your rights on this forum are listed HERE. If you feel that any of these rights have been violated, please don't hesitate to contact a Pastor at once.
Will do Pastor! As for your inquiry, we grow primarily wheat, corn, and oats. We keep it pure and simple, as we keep ourselves! No need to complicate things with those horrible GMO's and hippy foods like kale or soy, am I right? We grow small amounts of broccoli and pumpkin also. Thank you for your interest.

God Bless!


God is my fertilizer. Through Him, I grow stronger.
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Default Re: Afternoon! - 07-16-2014, 02:21 AM

How nice a see a grown rural man come and introduce himself! Nice verse! And a profession to fulfill God's prophecy!

Genesis 3:19
In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto the ground; for out of it wast thou taken: for dust thou art, and unto dust shalt thou return.


How has life treated you offspringwise? In the rustic region you probably do a lot of huntin' an' killin' for God's Glory?

A bit worried 'bout the broccoli... It is very popular among the sodomites and it has not been established if it is the CAUSE or EFFECT of homerism. I'd be very careful. If the profit from it is good, I can understand cultivating it but I'd not dare consume it myself. There are disturbing images in the Interwebs showing young men who ate broccoli and turned sissy.

Nice to have you here! You may gain in Godliness and reach Heaven eventually!

Yours in Christ,

Elmer


2 Kings 18:25 - Am I now come up without the LORD against this place to destroy it? The LORD said to me, Go up against this land, and destroy it.



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Default Re: Afternoon! - 07-16-2014, 02:49 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Elmer G. White View Post
How nice a see a grown rural man come and introduce himself! Nice verse! And a profession to fulfill God's prophecy!

Genesis 3:19
In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto the ground; for out of it wast thou taken: for dust thou art, and unto dust shalt thou return.


How has life treated you offspringwise? In the rustic region you probably do a lot of huntin' an' killin' for God's Glory?

A bit worried 'bout the broccoli... It is very popular among the sodomites and it has not been established if it is the CAUSE or EFFECT of homerism. I'd be very careful. If the profit from it is good, I can understand cultivating it but I'd not dare consume it myself. There are disturbing images in the Interwebs showing young men who ate broccoli and turned sissy.

Nice to have you here! You may gain in Godliness and reach Heaven eventually!

Yours in Christ,

Elmer
Well! That's mighty kind on you to say! Since you ask, I've raised two children. Both male. One lives here with me, helping to work the land and looking for a fine Christian wife. The other, well, I don't keep much track of that one. He moved off to the city to make movies or bang queers or play "Halo" or some other hedonistic filth. I pray for him, but until he repents, he's not part of this family.

As for the broccoli, that's purely for the goats. Some fella in Kansas who doesn't have much land pays us to raise the goats for him. Then they get shipped to him. Not sure what for. And he insists they be fed that way. I'm trying to look in to it to see if it's something unholy. But until then, I can't break contract for two more years. He's got a Jew doing his lawyer work. They may be bound for Hell, but they sure do know numbers and statutes.

God Bless.


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Default Re: Afternoon! - 07-16-2014, 03:38 AM

You are in GREAT PERIL, Mister! STOP THE BROCCOLI NOW!!

Look at THIS piece of news!

Quote:
Nearly two and a half decades after broccoli was thrust into the political spotlight when President George H. W. Bush said he hated eating it - the nutritious green veggie is dividing the nation once again.
President Barack Obama is finding himself in hot water after declaring on Wednesday that his favorite food is broccoli. One Republican commenter went so far as to say the comment shows that the president is elitist...
Father of the BESTEST president the World has seen HATED broccoli and Ubama LOOOOOOVES it.

As you can see here!





Feeding it to goats, geese or BEEF will turn them GAY and gay beef is NOT what white True Christian™ consumers WANT!

Please, reconsider your position. Are you sure your other son did not get a whiff of broccoli vapors in his nostrils before he abandoned Jesus!? Could explain a lot!

Ezekiel 34:3
Ye eat the fat, and ye clothe you with the wool, ye kill them that are fed: but ye feed not the flock.


Yours in Christ,

Elmer


2 Kings 18:25 - Am I now come up without the LORD against this place to destroy it? The LORD said to me, Go up against this land, and destroy it.



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Default Re: Afternoon! - 07-16-2014, 04:27 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Elmer G. White View Post
You are in GREAT PERIL, Mister! STOP THE BROCCOLI NOW!!

Look at THIS piece of news!



Father of the BESTEST president the World has seen HATED broccoli and Ubama LOOOOOOVES it.

As you can see here!





Feeding it to goats, geese or BEEF will turn them GAY and gay beef is NOT what white True Christian™ consumers WANT!

Please, reconsider your position. Are you sure your other son did not get a whiff of broccoli vapors in his nostrils before he abandoned Jesus!? Could explain a lot!

Ezekiel 34:3
Ye eat the fat, and ye clothe you with the wool, ye kill them that are fed: but ye feed not the flock.


Yours in Christ,

Elmer
Goodness gracious! I was completely unaware! And to think I let this filth onto my land. And I actually helped it grow! I will burn the vile plant and pray for His forgiveness! Thank you for showing me my error! Please excuse me! I must go out right away and destroy this blight as well as slaughter the unholy goats that have consumed it! Surely the man who buys the goats had something truly diabolical in mind. He and "Mr. Goldstein, Attorney at Law" can burn as will the contract!

A thousand blessings to you! Should the Good Lord choose to forgive me, I will have you to thank for showing me my error!


God is my fertilizer. Through Him, I grow stronger.
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Default Re: Afternoon! - 07-16-2014, 06:25 AM

eeeeyy mann why u gotta be hating on Obama? is it cause hes black? yall are terrible people and whats wrong with gay people???
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Default Re: Afternoon! - 07-16-2014, 06:51 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by MTEden View Post
eeeeyy mann why u gotta be hating on Obama? is it cause hes black?...
If they said, "No, it's because he's half white", would that make you happy?

Quote:
...whats wrong with gay people???
Ever read a Bible?


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Dr Laurence Niles Dr Laurence Niles is offline
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Default Re: Afternoon! - 07-16-2014, 08:38 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by MTEden View Post
eeeeyy mann why u gotta be hating on Obama? is it cause hes black? yall are terrible people and whats wrong with gay people???
Nobody is being racialist. Whether or not Obama is half coon or not has no bearing on the fact that he is half African.

Leviticus 18:22 Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is abomination.

Leviticus 20:13 If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.

I hope that answers your silly question.

YIC


1 Corinthians 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

Revelation 22:15 For without are dogs, and sorcerers, and whoremongers, and murderers, and idolaters, and whosoever loveth and maketh a lie.

Leviticus 20:13 If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.
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Default Re: Afternoon! - 07-16-2014, 11:16 AM

Welcome! It's nice to meet you! Just one thing, be careful about the types of vegetables you grow!

Anyways,


That was the link that isn't working.
http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showt...egetables+make


Atheists! Make the right choice!
or
It should be obvious.
Come stand with us, with Christians, with Jesus, in eternal glory in heaven instead of agony in hell. You won't regret it!

Last edited by Steph Leia; 07-16-2014 at 11:17 AM. Reason: Link didn't work
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Default Re: Afternoon! - 07-16-2014, 04:09 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by HolyErrandBoy View Post
Goodness gracious! I was completely unaware! And to think I let this filth onto my land. And I actually helped it grow! I will burn the vile plant and pray for His forgiveness! Thank you for showing me my error! Please excuse me! I must go out right away and destroy this blight as well as slaughter the unholy goats that have consumed it! Surely the man who buys the goats had something truly diabolical in mind. He and "Mr. Goldstein, Attorney at Law" can burn as will the contract!

A thousand blessings to you! Should the Good Lord choose to forgive me, I will have you to thank for showing me my error!
Say, before you burn your bridges (), you might consider hiring this Jew Lawyer to help you. The Jews don't have ethics like we do, so all you have to do is offer him a little more monetary compensation than your goat-herder partner does, you know, to make sure your contract can't be used against you. If it's not too late, you might consider sending him the broccoli crop as compensation. He can sell it at his local farmer's market. They're good at selling things, these Jews. Profit is in their blood.

Just an idea.



Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

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HolyErrandBoy HolyErrandBoy is offline
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Default Re: Afternoon! - 07-16-2014, 04:47 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda View Post
Say, before you burn your bridges (), you might consider hiring this Jew Lawyer to help you. The Jews don't have ethics like we do, so all you have to do is offer him a little more monetary compensation than your goat-herder partner does, you know, to make sure your contract can't be used against you. If it's not too late, you might consider sending him the broccoli crop as compensation. He can sell it at his local farmer's market. They're good at selling things, these Jews. Profit is in their blood.

Just an idea.

While it's a fine idea, I'm afraid I couldn't afford him. Not to mention he lives all the way in Kansas.

On the lighter side, I have removed that taint from my land. Both the broccoli and the goats. There's some hippy kids growing marijuana down a few miles the road, so I left all of it on their lawn. Evil compost for their evil plants. I don't want to be wasteful!

John 6:12
"And when they had eaten their fill, he told his disciples, 'Gather up the leftover fragments, that nothing may be lost.'"

Anyway, the chapel has decided to hold services here for a while to drive out any remaining evil. Thank all of you for your support and advice in this trying time!

God Bless!


God is my fertilizer. Through Him, I grow stronger.
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Default Re: Afternoon! - 07-17-2014, 03:24 AM

Holy Errand Boy,

First of all, welcome to our friendly forums, the ONLY site on the interwebs that has the full approval of our amazing and wonderful Savior! Yes, Jesus posts here on special occasions! It's true!

I can't help but wonder your age. Your picture appears to display a man of at least 25 or so - or perhaps younger?

What qualities are you seeking in a wife? The Lord has not yet blessed me with a husbandman. How old is your son? Is he fair of face, tight-buttocked, and built to impart male seeds?

I am filled with praise to the Lord for sending you to worship and glorify the King of Kings with us.

NRL


1 Samuel 8:13 "And he will take your daughters to be confectionaries, and to be cookes, and to be bakers."
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HolyErrandBoy HolyErrandBoy is offline
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Default Re: Afternoon! - 07-17-2014, 03:49 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Naomi Ruth Lamb View Post
Holy Errand Boy,

First of all, welcome to our friendly forums, the ONLY site on the interwebs that has the full approval of our amazing and wonderful Savior! Yes, Jesus posts here on special occasions! It's true!

I can't help but wonder your age. Your picture appears to display a man of at least 25 or so - or perhaps younger?

What qualities are you seeking in a wife? The Lord has not yet blessed me with a husbandman. How old is your son? Is he fair of face, tight-buttocked, and built to impart male seeds?

I am filled with praise to the Lord for sending you to worship and glorify the King of Kings with us.

NRL
Boy do I wish I was twenty-five again! No, I'm sixty-seven, though still strong as a bull. My son is a pure-blooded white. Blonde hair, blue eyes and 100% Christian-American. And he matches your description to a tee I suppose. He's looking for a good Christian woman. Someone to tend the kitchen and home while he does real work. And to bear strong, Aryan children devoted to Christ.


God is my fertilizer. Through Him, I grow stronger.
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