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Default Re: I hate going to the toilet - 02-26-2011, 02:37 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Helge Fossmo View Post
No, Jesus is a white heterosexual protestant like the rest of us.
JESUS!!!
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Default Re: I hate going to the toilet - 02-26-2011, 04:22 PM

When I was a child I went through a phase where I refused to go to the bathroom because I was afraid JESUS was watching. I would hold it until I simply went in my pants and then my mother would have to clean it up.

This went on till I was about 9, until my relationship with JESUS CHRIST become strong enough that I was finally comfortable letting Him watch me go to the bathroom.

Of course it's still a shameful act and I ask GOD to forgive me for exposing myself to Him, but I no longer go in my pants and I feel that is something that any True Christian could be proud to admit.



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- Proverbs 15:3

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Default Re: I hate going to the toilet - 02-27-2011, 07:55 AM

Well there's always adult diapers, but I don't like the idea of leaving those behind.

Perhaps we'll get a 15 second warning; just enough time to pull up the pants/down the skirt and flush.


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Default Re: I hate going to the toilet - 03-08-2011, 01:26 AM

Men are so lucky, they can stand up and act like nothing is happening, we ladies have to sit with our feet dangling in the air, helpless and confused.
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Default Re: I hate going to the toilet - 03-08-2011, 01:42 AM

Its discusting when some people abuse toilet papers!
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Default Re: I hate going to the toilet - 03-08-2011, 10:26 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sister Mary Maria View Post
I hate going to the toilet as I can't help but feeling that Jesus disapproves of such a filthy act. Surely it can't be pleasant for Him having to see something as disgusting as a person ur***ting or def**ating.
.
Dont you think, that Jesus makes a popo once in a while?
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Thumbs up Re: I hate going to the toilet - 03-08-2011, 11:48 AM

I don't think jesus minds you guys/girls defecating.

Hell, read this article. We may well be made out of poo (instead of dust)

A RESPECTED scientist has put forward the stunning - if unsavoury -
possibility that humans are descended from sewage dumped overboard by
aliens.
Dr Andrei Arkhipov, of the Institute of Radio Astronomy in Kharkiv in the
Ukraine, claims that the ultimate origin of life on Earth began with
microbes, which had come through the atmosphere as lumps of alien waste. It
is hardly the sort of explanation one normally associates with the
scientific community. Yet Dr Arkhipov's ideas have been deemed sufficiently
cogent to appear in the latest issue of The Observatory, a respected
astronomical research journal.
While many will turn their noses up at such a suggestion, scientists admit
that they have long had problems trying to explain how life on Earth began.
Conditions on the early Earth were so awful that no one can figure out how
delicate chemicals like DNA needed for life managed to develop.
To get around this problem, some experts have suggested that perhaps life
came to Earth from outer space ready-made, in the form of bacteria or
viruses. The question then becomes: how did it get here?
Dr Arkhipov points out that our own space programme has led to
microbe-bearing "debris" being dumped in space. Organisms buried deep within
such debris would also be very well protected from the rigours of the
cosmos. "For example, freeze-dried spores in drops of rocket fuel, or human
faecal material from our spacecraft, are quite well adapted to interstellar
travel," Dr Arkhipov writes.
And if we humans have already started dumping such stuff into space, argues
Dr Arkhipov, there is every reason to think other beings may have done so
too. As he delicately puts it: "Contaminated artefacts could be in the
interstellar medium".
With some back-of-the-envelope calculations, Dr Arkhipov estimates that the
typical result of alien ablutions would be the creation of a "cordon
non-sanitaire" around stars extending for several light-years. Any planetary
system passing by would run the risk of being showered with the stuff - and
thus being "fertilised" by whatever the alien dung contained.
Dr Arkhipov estimates that his explanation of the origin of life of Earth
still works if only one planet in every 20,000 indulges in unseemly hygiene
practices.


A good day to you!!

the fryer
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Default Re: I hate going to the toilet - 03-08-2011, 06:46 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fryer Good Shepherd View Post
...Conditions on the early Earth were so awful that no one can figure out how
delicate chemicals like DNA needed for life managed to develop.
To get around this problem, some experts have suggested that perhaps life
came to Earth from outer space ready-made, in the form of bacteria or
viruses. The question then becomes: how did it get here?...
No, it doesn't. That "answer" (that life originated elsewhere and then made it's way to Earth) just replaces God of the Bible and the Creation myth with aliens (more gods) and another Creation myth.

Displacing the origins of life from Earth does not answer the question of the origins of life. The question really then becomes, "How did it start in the first place?" Your Russian (who I suspect is actually a theist) has no answer for this (and doesn't want one), and tries to deflect the discussion into another one about how many angels can dance on the head of a pin.


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Default Re: I hate going to the toilet - 04-15-2012, 02:37 AM

What would Jesus do if he know your just dont enjoy because god dosent your going to burnwith satan and dirty arabs


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Default Re: I hate going to the toilet - 04-15-2012, 02:46 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by SexyWhore View Post
What would Jesus do if he know your just dont enjoy because god dosent your going to burn with satan and dirty arabs
Would you care to put down the crack pipe and try that again? You're not making sense, dear.


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Default Re: I hate going to the toilet - 04-15-2012, 04:33 AM

I'm sure that when he was alive, Ieshua felt the need to empty his bladder and colon on a regular basis just like any other man.
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Default Re: I hate going to the toilet - 04-15-2012, 04:37 AM

Ieshua?
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Default Re: I hate going to the toilet - 04-15-2012, 04:48 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fleur-de-lis View Post
I'm sure that when he was alive, Ieshua felt the need to empty his bladder and colon on a regular basis just like any other man.
Have you ever got the point of ANYTHING in your futile little existence?

Why are you still here?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Catherine Moore View Post
Ieshua?
She thinks it makes her sound clever to use some made-up "Aramaic" spelling, as if Aramaic uses a Roman alphabet.

If God wanted us to call Jesus "Ieshua", don't you think that's what the Bible would call Him?


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Default Re: I hate going to the toilet - 04-15-2012, 05:00 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Didymus Much View Post
Have you ever got the point of ANYTHING in your futile little existence?

Why are you still here?
Why are you?

Wouldn't you rather flog your atheism in a more receptive locale?

You could join in Second Baptist's Atheist Mission to Saudi Arabia. Just think, you could spend two whole weeks telling Muslims that their "prophet" was a child-raping pedophile, just like the Pope! And that Allah is just a moon god that they decided to make the "one true god"! And all sorts of cool sciencey things!

Wouldn't that be great? I'm told the Arabs are really eager to learn all about atheism and how stupid Islam is.


Bible boring? Nonsense!
Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!
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Default Re: I hate going to the toilet - 04-15-2012, 06:02 PM

Friends, stay on topic.

God does not like anyone going to the toilet. It is a place full of disease and an enormous amount of 'accidental' sodomy.

Do anyone really think a thin sheet of cheap paper is going to protect them from Satan's chocolate?


Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
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Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: I hate going to the toilet - 04-15-2012, 09:08 PM

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Originally Posted by James Hutchins View Post
Friends, stay on topic.

God does not like anyone going to the toilet. It is a place full of disease and an enormous amount of 'accidental' sodomy.

Do anyone really think a thin sheet of cheap paper is going to protect them from Satan's chocolate?
Amen Brother! Double PLUS Amen! All True Christians know that if a boy touches himself, even in the shower, he is a homosexural. So just shut up about it and accept the fact that you are going to burn in HELL FOR ALL ETERNITY! "Fantasizing" about the "body parts" of female sluts is never an excuse! Since a boy is touching a male unmentionable member, that makes him HOMOSEXURAL! Including in the toilet!!


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Kitchen Keepin Kitchen Keepin is offline
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Default Re: I hate going to the toilet - 04-16-2012, 04:36 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
Amen Brother! Double PLUS Amen! All True Christians know that if a boy touches himself, even in the shower, he is a homosexural. So just shut up about it and accept the fact that you are going to burn in HELL FOR ALL ETERNITY! "Fantasizing" about the "body parts" of female sluts is never an excuse! Since a boy is touching a male unmentionable member, that makes him HOMOSEXURAL! Including in the toilet!!
Little boys should be taught to relieve themselves sitting down, carefully avoiding touching that thing between their legs.


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