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Default False Jesus Radio Advice - 12-06-2006, 01:15 PM

Brothers, I hope that you will all join me in calling THIS radio station to demand the degenerate homer be taken off the air and horsewhipped for attempting to impersonate our Saviour, Jesus Christ.

Quote:
What would Jesus say?
Radio host takes on godly persona, gives life advice


Inside KFI-AM, the face of this Jesus looks nothing like familiar images of Christ. Bald and goateed sans moustache, he wears a hoop earring and bears the tattoos of a rebellious youth.

The voice of KFI Jesus - a strong, smooth bass - belongs to Neil Saavedra, who does not believe he is the Messiah, yet he assumes the godly persona during a three-hour call-in show that airs Sunday mornings.

His tone is not sarcastic but loving, his aim not to deceive but to reach Christians in need of support, encouragement and pastoral advice.

For Saavedra, a lifelong Christian who had his born-again moment at age 17, it’s a calling. Serving as marketing director for KFI-AM (640) pays his bills. Hosting “The Jesus Christ Show” is how he gives back.

“Do I feel qualified to answer any of this stuff? No way,” he said during a commercial break. “But sometimes the people are so desperate for help, my God, I’ve got to do something.”

Listeners heed his wisdom; some consider it divinely inspired.

The Christian Bible warns no fewer than seven times against false teachers who will twist God’s message for their own gain. Christians are taught to be on guard, clearly illustrated during an early commercial break.

“Hey Neil, on Line2 the guy seems a bit combative,” KFI Jesus’ call screener said. “He wants to know if you are a false Jesus and if we should run from you.”

Saavedra, 37, comes from a large family - five brothers and one sister. Born and raised Catholic, he grew up in a lower-income Ventura County home and was never much of a student.

In the studio, “your holy host,” as KFI Jesus refers to himself, has a stack of references - his “safety net” and “security blanket” - which include the Bible, commentaries on the Old and New testaments, the books “When Skeptics Ask” and “When Critics Ask” and a 2-inch stack of notes.

“One time, I dropped an F-bomb in front of my mom, and this sweet lady, who was raised Catholic - she went to parochial school - looked at me and said, `Son, you are no Jesus.’ And I said, `Mom, you are no virgin.”‘

Saavedra’s faith is fervent, but he is not pious. His opening monologue usually is an indication of his recent struggles, and when it’s about God’s plan for sexual purity, his colleagues know he’s not following it.

“He is very religious, but he is very rebellious,” said Robin Bertolucci, KFI’s program director. “He has sort of a love-hate relationship with religion.”

“Elijah was suicidal; Isaiah preached naked. These are not perfect people. Job went bankrupt; John the Baptist ate bugs. It wasn’t about perfection. It wasn’t about them not having any flaws. It was about God using them, seeing in them the passion and intensity for the word of God,” KFI Jesus told his audience.
All I have to say about this is....

1 John 4:1 Beloved, believe not every spirit, but try the spirits whether they are of God: because many false prophets are gone out into the world.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: False Jesus Radio Advice - 12-06-2006, 01:23 PM

He's nothing but a False Prophet Pastor Ezekiel!

Psalm 120: 1-3
In my distress I cried unto the LORD, and he heard me.
Deliver my soul, O LORD, from lying lips, and from a deceitful tongue.
What shall be given unto thee? or what shall be done unto thee, thou false tongue?



Sister Talitha

Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.


HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41



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Default Re: False Jesus Radio Advice - 12-06-2006, 01:24 PM

I hate the expression "false prophet". It sounds too, too...They're all just a bunch of wackos...


The Lord is a man of war: the Lord is his name.
Exodus 15:3

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Default Re: False Jesus Radio Advice - 12-06-2006, 01:31 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by tommy View Post
I hate the expression "false prophet". It sounds too, too...They're all just a bunch of wackos...
That's what these Demons want you to think Brother:

Matthew 7: 15
Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves.
Matthew 24:11
And many false prophets shall rise, and shall deceive many.


I think someone needs Bible Reading classes.



Sister Talitha

Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.


HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41



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Default Re: False Jesus Radio Advice - 12-06-2006, 01:36 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sister Talitha View Post
That's what these Demons want you to think Brother:

Matthew 7: 15
Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves.
Matthew 24:11
And many false prophets shall rise, and shall deceive many.


I think someone needs Bible Reading classes.
I do, I do need Bible classes- Sadly there is no Landover baptist church in my country. Do you run an on-line Bible-class?


The Lord is a man of war: the Lord is his name.
Exodus 15:3

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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
 

One Year/1000 posts Ribfest '09 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Saved 1 Year Long service medal, 3rd class Christian Love True Christian™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Real American™ True Heterosexual™ Tithing Manager 2008 Witch Hunt Award Gunfest '09 Senior Pastor Mission to Australia Heaven Bound Tagging for Jesus The Lord’s Witness Wound Home Schooled Punched the most queers TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Jailed for JESUS Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot 20,000 posts Friend of Jesus 2010 Witch Hunt Award Flat Earth 50,000 posts Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Mission to Japan Pro-Life Mission to Las Vegas True Christian Provider™ award True Scientist™ Eats the Most Pork 2011 Witch Hunt Award Outreach preacher Special Mission (North Korea) Golden Bear Award True Republican Batman Shooting Survivor Sons of Liberty Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! WisconSIN Shooting survivor Proud Niglet Sponsorer Truck Stop Ministry Member Hatchet Child Rearing Award Kirk Cameron Fan Club In Love With Zeke Bear Prayer Warrior 2012 Witch Hunt Award Man of the Year True Christian Hotrodder Paula Deen Negro Support Group Gator Touched by Jesus 75,000 posts Man of the Year Babysitter 2014 Witch Hunt Award Stamp of Approval Mission to Korea Trump of GOD Uber Angels Driver Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch Roper Crossburn Donald Trump 2016! Pancake Dinner Anti-sodomy Hands Off 2015 Witch Hunt Award Pastor Ezekiel Golden Bear Award Mission Long service medal, 2nd class Aardvark Asked questions later Heart of compassion Crown of Righteousness The Crown of Crowns Crown of Glory Crown of Incorruptibility Crown of Rejoicing Crown of Life BFF of Jesus Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Probing for Jesus Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Saved 10 Years Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Mission to the Philippines Clorox Cured Me QAnon Storm Chaser Anti-Biden British Royalty

 
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Default Re: False Jesus Radio Advice - 12-06-2006, 01:38 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by tommy View Post
I do, I do need Bible classes- Sadly there is no Landover baptist church in my country. Do you run an on-line Bible-class?
Sure! Hit that Paypal button at the bottom of this screen and you'll be put in touch with our on-line Bible study pastors. We take all credit cards, and I do mean all.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: False Jesus Radio Advice - 12-06-2006, 04:12 PM

People who listen to that blasphemous show, and particularly those who call in, should also be horsewhipped for paying attention to that false Jesus and thereby ignoring the warning of the real Jesus:

Mat 24:23 Then if any man shall say unto you, Lo, here [is] Christ, or there; believe [it] not.

Mar 13:21 And then if any man shall say to you, Lo, here [is] Christ; or, lo, [he is] there; believe [him] not:


This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.

Questions to ask liberal "Christians"Things that the Bible doesn't sayTolerance

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Default Re: False Jesus Radio Advice - 12-06-2006, 06:54 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by More Saved Than Thou View Post

Mat 24:23 Then if any man shall say unto you, Lo, here [is] Christ, or there; believe [it] not.

Mar 13:21 And then if any man shall say to you, Lo, here [is] Christ; or, lo, [he is] there; believe [him] not:
Surely if you look long enough, you can FIND HIM.
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Default Re: False Jesus Radio Advice - 12-07-2006, 12:02 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by OnYourKnees View Post
Surely if you look long enough, you can FIND HIM.
Listen, Brother OYK. I followed your Link and found HIM© hiding in the Market place, and all I got was a lousy T-shirt!!
It's a good job I'm already guaranteed Salvation™ here at Landover Bapti$t Church.



Sister Talitha

Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.


HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41



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Default Re: False Jesus Radio Advice - 12-07-2006, 12:31 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sister Talitha View Post
Listen, Brother OYK. I followed your Link and found HIM© hiding in the Market place, and all I got was a lousy T-shirt!!
It's a good job I'm already guaranteed Salvation™ here at Landover Bapti$t Church.
Sister Talitha, I'd no idea you still felt a need to look for Him©.
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Default Re: False Jesus Radio Advice - 12-07-2006, 12:36 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by OnYourKnees View Post
Sister Talitha, I'd no idea you still felt a need to look for Him©.
Of course silly!!
We all should look for HIM© in case he has returned.
Pastor keeps saying that soon the Rapture will occur and we must Tithe and make substantial Loving Donations to the Lord© ready for this occasion.
He will certainly need new Sandals after all this time.



Sister Talitha

Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.


HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41



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