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Debate Moderator (and participant) Master Debater-- Has Never Been Defeated in a Debate Louder Than Reason
True Christian™
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Posts: 2,139
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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How many goths have you bagged today? -
10-31-2006, 03:49 PM
Witch hunting season started with a bang and a thud this year for old Wash. As I was driving to the fish and tackle store to get my Witch Hunting Permit I saw a live one walking to the mall (probably to go to hot Topic and by copious amounts of "The Nightmare Before Christmas" clothing) so I made a sharp turn onto the sidewalk and pinned her between my grill and a lightpost. The minor damages to my car (who knew such a fat waste of space could do so much front-end damage to a Land Rover?) were a small price to pay (and were easily covered by the spending money found in the subject's wallet) for keeping the streets free of gothic losers this Halloween. Even though it is against the law to kill a Goth without a permit I know God and the Freehold city Fish and Game commission will look the other way this time seeing my perfect record with them and impecable eye for Goths.
Last edited by Wash O'Hanley; 10-31-2006 at 04:10 PM.
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Landover Security Superviser Asset Loss Prevention and Personal Security Expert NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
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Posts: 18,554
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Location: Freehold Iowa
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Re: How many goths have you bagged today? -
10-31-2006, 04:09 PM
Got a good one yesterday. It was one of those Goth 'guys', if anything under all that long hair and make up could be considered male. He/She/It was walking around the ruins of the old Robbins mill writing poetry or spells or something (hard to tell). Put the first bullet into it's book and was rewarded with a great expression of shock on it's face. Next bullet when into it's right leg and I let it try to crawl away for a few minutes before I closed for the kill. Those won't fake tears of angst on that Goth’s face let me tell you.
Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.
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The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running aka the BiblethumpinBlonde
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Posts: 15,473
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Apostles Grove, Freehold, IA
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Re: How many goths have you bagged today? -
10-31-2006, 04:10 PM
Nice kill Brother Wash!
I didn't kill this gothtard, but I did manage drag him about 200 yards before his pleather coat came free from my bumper.
I turned around and tried to go back and finish him off but he disappeared down a manhole. I decided not to go after him as I was running late for my nail appointment.
With Love, Sister Thumper
P/S: I still have one of his horns stuck in my left rear wheel hub cap.
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Wretched Unsaved Goth Ixi, have you done your homework yet?
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Re: How many goths have you bagged today? -
10-31-2006, 05:40 PM
YOU IDIOTS!
A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle.
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Landover Security Superviser Asset Loss Prevention and Personal Security Expert NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
True Christian™
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Posts: 18,554
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold Iowa
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Re: How many goths have you bagged today? -
10-31-2006, 05:51 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ixi
YOU IDIOTS!
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I dare you to come to Freehold and say that to us Ixi.
Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.
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Senior Pastor Ex-liberal; converted to True Christianity™ Always Biblically correct
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Posts: 10,667
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: 13706 Levite's Sojourn Terr., Gibeah Hill, Freehold, Iowa
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Re: How many goths have you bagged today? -
10-31-2006, 05:53 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wash O'Hanley
Even though it is against the law to kill a Goth without a permit I know God and the Freehold city Fish and Game commission will look the other way this time seeing my perfect record with them and impecable eye for Goths.
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If things get unpleasant, be sure to demand a jury trial. Since we're talking about Freehold, not some liberal waste of space like Virginia Beach, you should be able to get a sympathetic jury.
This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.
Questions to ask liberal "Christians" ✞ Things that the Bible doesn't say ✞ Tolerance
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Landover Security Superviser Asset Loss Prevention and Personal Security Expert NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
True Christian™
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Posts: 18,554
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold Iowa
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Re: How many goths have you bagged today? -
10-31-2006, 05:55 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by More Saved Than Thou
If things get unpleasant, be sure to demand a jury trial. Since we're talking about Freehold, not some liberal waste of space like Virginia Beach, you should be able to get a sympathetic jury.
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Trial for a misdemeanor? Wash should just be a man about it and pay the $20 fine.
Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.
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Youthful soldier of Christ
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Posts: 86
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Location: Land of Chavs, England
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Re: How many goths have you bagged today? -
10-31-2006, 07:17 PM
I've done my best to make the few I have pinned down look like suicidal deaths, as I'd rather not be charged for doing His work by the damned British Government..
So far it seems to be working, I had one in the woods earlier trying to sacrifice innocent kitties to his/her/its demon gods, and I snuck up before smacking it as hard as I could over its hideous greasy haired head. It sort of collapsed beside me, so I put a bullet in it's head and dumped it over the bridge into the stream!! Suicide of a depressed mopey gothic, that's what the police will say!
~Rain
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Christ's Cōnsiliārius
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Posts: 9,311
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Re: How many goths have you bagged today? -
10-31-2006, 07:56 PM
Friends, I may have hit the jackpot! Instead of letting all the little demons slag about the streets getting entangled in the teeth of the neighborhood pit bulls, we arranged for them to all appear in one place....a county park WITH their wickedan parents. We billed this as a "Halloween Samhain celebration and Renaissance Faire". It will attract every tree-hugger and their demon-spawn for miles around!
We have set up barrels of gasoline every fifteen feet, disguised as light stands. At 8PM sharp, everyone will gather inside the circle of lights for the grand drawing and the crowning of the Lord and Lady. Then.....BOOM!
I can just imagine all the little wickedan children, hair and hemp clothing ablaze, running in circles screaming.
Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
"God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6
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Wretched Unsaved Goth Ixi, have you done your homework yet?
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Posts: 844
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Re: How many goths have you bagged today? -
10-31-2006, 08:58 PM
You wouldn't dare! Where is this taking place, tonight?
A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle.
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Landover Security Superviser Asset Loss Prevention and Personal Security Expert NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
True Christian™
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Posts: 18,554
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold Iowa
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Re: How many goths have you bagged today? -
10-31-2006, 09:01 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ixi
You wouldn't dare! Where is this taking place, tonight?
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I don't know. Pastor Al has gone "undisclosed" on the Pastor Watch board here in Security but frankly I wish he had chosen to invite me to help out at his party. It sounds Godly.
Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.
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Wretched Unsaved Goth Ixi, have you done your homework yet?
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Posts: 844
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Re: How many goths have you bagged today? -
10-31-2006, 09:03 PM
It sounds stupid! So its at Landover?
A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle.
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Landover Security Superviser Asset Loss Prevention and Personal Security Expert NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
True Christian™
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Posts: 18,554
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold Iowa
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Re: How many goths have you bagged today? -
10-31-2006, 09:07 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ixi
It sounds stupid! So its at Landover?
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There are no wickers at Landover Baptist church or in the city of Freehold, Iowa. All do I know is Pastor Al and his bodyguards are out of Freehold and if I did know I am certianly not going to tell the likes of you were he is. I bet you would love nothing more that to strap a bomb to your chest Ixi and run up to Pastor Al.
Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.
Hot Must ReadThreads!
Time to come clean on Benghazi Mr Obama!
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Wretched Unsaved Goth Ixi, have you done your homework yet?
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Posts: 844
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Re: How many goths have you bagged today? -
10-31-2006, 09:10 PM
Not really...just save my friends.
A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle.
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LBC psychiatric outpatient. Progressing nicely.
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Posts: 989
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, IA
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Re: How many goths have you bagged today? -
11-01-2006, 12:30 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Miss.Ixi
Not really...just save my friends.
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your wish is my commands, Miss.Ixi!
here be Miss.Goy, she were a wicker slave an them mean wickers whupped her into submissshuns , they forceds her go trick-or-treatin in my nieghborhood she walked for miles an miles her dainty an ladylike trotters sore an raw from her liddle piggy exershuns . but it ok cuz now she safe in my basements an Miss.Sue Vera gonna be gettin lots an lots of bootiful christmas hams
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Wretched Unsaved Goth Ixi, have you done your homework yet?
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Posts: 844
Join Date: Sep 2006
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Re: How many goths have you bagged today? -
11-01-2006, 12:41 AM
Who is that cute cat in your avatar?
A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle.
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Christ's Cōnsiliārius
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Posts: 9,311
Join Date: Sep 2006
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Re: How many goths have you bagged today? -
11-01-2006, 12:54 AM
They were twins. One was named Twinkie and one was named Cupcake. They were catnapped during a cat nap and are now known as The cats in the kettle at the Peking Moon.
Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
"God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6
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LBC psychiatric outpatient. Progressing nicely.
True Christian™
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Posts: 989
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, IA
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Re: How many goths have you bagged today? -
11-01-2006, 01:16 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Miss.Ixi
Who is that cute cat in your avatar?
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that be Mr.Twinkie . i not no where Mr.Pastor Pistle be gettin his informashun from, cuz Mr.Cupcake were my bunny wabbit
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HEATHEN — Suspected Witch
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Posts: 5,110
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Location: Red Peking
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Re: How many goths have you bagged today? -
11-01-2006, 01:21 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Al E Pistle
Friends, I may have hit the jackpot! Instead of letting all the little demons slag about the streets getting entangled in the teeth of the neighborhood pit bulls, we arranged for them to all appear in one place....a county park WITH their wickedan parents. We billed this as a "Halloween Samhain celebration and Renaissance Faire". It will attract every tree-hugger and their demon-spawn for miles around!
We have set up barrels of gasoline every fifteen feet, disguised as light stands. At 8PM sharp, everyone will gather inside the circle of lights for the grand drawing and the crowning of the Lord and Lady. Then.....BOOM!
I can just imagine all the little wickedan children, hair and hemp clothing ablaze, running in circles screaming.
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Not if emergency leaflets are dropped over the area first!!
Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!
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True Christian™ Theologian
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Posts: 3,979
Join Date: Sep 2006
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Re: How many goths have you bagged today? -
11-01-2006, 12:58 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ixi
Who is that cute cat in your avatar?
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What do you mean, 'who'?
Animals doesn't have souls Ixki..
They're only walking (pre-packed) meat.
Sure, they're nice to cuddle, but only for so long, then you snap their neck and have your servants make a lovely dinner.
If thou be wise, thou shalt be wise for thyself: But if thou scornest, thou alone shalt bear it.
A foolish woman is clamorous: She is simple, and knoweth nothing.
Proverbs 9:12-13
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