[Brother_Dustin]

Hello friends,

I noticed that you have a lot of threads about women and how they should act and be treated.
I discovered a situation that I have not yet found the answer to. You see, just the other day I walked in on my wife in the shower (I don't allow her to lock any doors in the house, unless I say otherwise) and I was led to believe that she was pleasuring herself. We have a retractable shower head, and when I walked in, it was near her devil's layer and she seemed unusually embarrassed.

Though I did punish her, I don't know what else to do beyond these lines.
I need advice on what the right thing to do would be.

Your Brother in Faith,
Dustin

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Originally Posted by Brother_Dustin

Hello friends,

I noticed that you have a lot of threads about women and how they should act and be treated.
I discovered a situation that I have not yet found the answer to. You see, just the other day I walked in on my wife in the shower (I don't allow her to lock any doors in the house, unless I say otherwise) and I was led to believe that she was pleasuring herself. We have a retractable shower head, and when I walked in, it was near her devil's layer and she seemed unusually embarrassed.

Though I did punish her, I don't know what else to do beyond these lines.
I need advice on what the right thing to do would be.

Your Brother in Faith,
Dustin

Daily paddlings, an hour in her Prayer closet each morning, and no more showers! Take out that demonic contraption and restrict her to baths from now on.

I'm not sure why a Christian Man would need advice on how to discipline his own wife.

[Brother_Dustin]

Thank You Pastor.

Well, I have been paddling her daily since the incident and I have made her spend an hour and a half at the foot of her bed every morning and night. I also don't let her shower or bathe without me supervising her.
Due to the fact that she is pregnant with my fourth son, I've been going a little lighter on the beatings. Because of that I feel that she isn't being punished enough, what else could I do? I will not let her leave the house, except for grocery shopping, in which case I make my oldest son go with her, until I feel that the LORD has forgiven her. But how can I test her, to know that she has truly relieved from her sins?

Your Brother in Faith,
Dustin

[Nobar King]

Call a plumber and have a fixed shower head installed. Or, just duct tape the one you have to the bracket that holds it.

[Brother_Dustin]

Thank You Nobar King and believe me, it IS duct taped.

[William Snodgrass]

Is your wife a Christian also?

[Negative_Cool]

Originally Posted by Brother_Dustin

Thank You Nobar King and believe me, it IS duct taped.

I wouldn't trust duct tape, most of it is made by commie china men. I know I've had accidents with it before.

[openmindedagnostic]

Originally Posted by Nobar King

Call a plumber and have a fixed shower head installed. Or, just duct tape the one you have to the bracket that holds it.

yes because no woman could ever figure out how to take off and reapply duct tape

[Rev. Jim Osborne]

Originally Posted by openmindedagnostic

yes because no woman could ever figure out how to take off and reapply duct tape

That's actually a pretty idiotic suggestion. I keep my duct tape in the garage. My wife is not allowed into the garage unless I give her permission (just like all other True Christian™ men here do so). So, it would be pretty suspicious if I saw her sneaking around in there.

And even if she tried to reapply the same duct tape, it won't hold and her crime would be evident.

Finally, I know you're being sarcastic, but actually a lot of women couldn't figure out to take it off and reapply the tape. You've probably never conversed with many women. God gave them smaller brains then men (it's science, look it up) because their role is to be a servant and to bear children.

[Bob4God]

Originally Posted by Brother_Dustin

Due to the fact that she is pregnant with my fourth son, I've been going a little lighter on the beatings.

Nonsense brother, beat the hellfire out of her! In the old days a REAL man never hesitated to throw his wife a good beating, regardless of whether she was pregnant or not. Back then they didn't buy into all this liberal sissy sensitivity and tolerance foolishness. Pound her HARD.

My father used to slug momma in the gut when she was pregnant with me, and it taught her AND me a lesson! I turned out fine, so will your son!

EDIT: Brother Nobar has some good advice, but make sure she doesn't take a step-ladder into the shower with her to enable her to reach the mounted shower head.

[theunderdog]

Originally Posted by Bob4God

Nonsense brother, beat the hellfire out of her! In the old days a REAL man never hesitated to throw his wife a good beating, regardless of whether she was pregnant or not. Back then they didn't buy into all this liberal sissy sensitivity and tolerance foolishness. Pound her HARD.

My father used to slug momma in the gut when she was pregnant with me, and it taught her AND me a lesson! I turned out fine, so will your son!

EDIT: Brother Nobar has some good advice, but make sure she doesn't take a step-ladder into the shower with her to enable her to reach the mounted shower head.

No, you did not turn out "fine". The fact that you're even on this forum (and have a good reputation) confirms that. Beating pregnant women can result in the baby having deformities, mental/physical retardations, and lots of other things. I believe someone else said this already, but I'll say it again. Beating a woman is the ultimate form of cowardice. It means that you don't have the balls to fight a man, or like one. That's like sneaking up behind someone then shooting them in the back of the head. Oh, and I'm sure that this will ban me, so I'll say a few things. 1: I'm a queer. Yeah, didn't think you could get rid of me that easily, did you? 2: This goes without saying, but I'll say it anyway. Evey single person on this forum who isn't classified as unsaved trash or worse will DEFINITELY (I mean beyond a shadow of a doubt) be going to Hell (don't even try to edit this and switch it to Heaven, denying it isn't going to change a damn thing). Why? Because lying is a sin, as well as nearly eveything else that you do. 3: For those of you who pretend that you're really important (this goes for you Nobar, Ezekiel, and others): you're not. Period. I really don't care if you have the power to ban me, it doesn't mean anything outside this forum. Sorry everyone I've become friends with to leave you so soon, but it's necessary to get my point across. Finally, when you're standing at the gates of Hell, waiting to go in and burn for everything you've done, I like to entertain the notion that the only thought going through your mind will be "I should have listened to them". Because you will. Delete this post if you will, but all unsaved trash, try to quote this as much as possible so that more people see it. And with that, as the French say, adieu.

[SayvedByTheLord]

Originally Posted by theunderminer

Beating pregnant women can result in the baby having deformities, mental/physical retardations, and lots of other things.

All of these things result from the fact That the baby made Jesus angry while in utero.

I believe someone else said this already, but I'll say it again. Beating a woman is the ultimate form of cowardice. It means that you don't have the balls to fight a man, or like one.

God commands that women be correctly guided to Salvation©.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Originally Posted by theunderdog

No, you did not turn out "fine". The fact that you're even on this forum (and have a good reputation) confirms that. Beating pregnant women can result in the baby having deformities, mental/physical retardations, and lots of other things. I believe someone else said this already, but I'll say it again. Beating a woman is the ultimate form of cowardice. It means that you don't have the balls to fight a man, or like one. That's like sneaking up behind someone then shooting them in the back of the head. Oh, and I'm sure that this will ban me, so I'll say a few things. 1: I'm a queer. Yeah, didn't think you could get rid of me that easily, did you? 2: This goes without saying, but I'll say it anyway. Evey single person on this forum who isn't classified as unsaved trash or worse will DEFINITELY (I mean beyond a shadow of a doubt) be going to Hell (don't even try to edit this and switch it to Heaven, denying it isn't going to change a damn thing). Why? Because lying is a sin, as well as nearly eveything else that you do. 3: For those of you who pretend that you're really important (this goes for you Nobar, Ezekiel, and others): you're not. Period. I really don't care if you have the power to ban me, it doesn't mean anything outside this forum. Sorry everyone I've become friends with to leave you so soon, but it's necessary to get my point across. Finally, when you're standing at the gates of Hell, waiting to go in and burn for everything you've done, I like to entertain the notion that the only thought going through your mind will be "I should have listened to them". Because you will. Delete this post if you will, but all unsaved trash, try to quote this as much as possible so that more people see it. And with that, as the French say, adieu.

Just look at the hatred that eminates from these unsaved demons! Brothers and sisters, I hope you will all read this sodomites final rant and memorize it! See how we rattle satan's cage at Landover Baptist!! While we have done nothing but shower this angry little queer with the love of Christ, he has chosen to reject that love and spit in God's face, condemning itself to an eternity in hellfire.

And I'd be willing to bet my Pastor's monthly stipend that this little maggot is going to slither back in here for yet another dramatic exit.

Jesus always wins!

[JohnTheBaptist]

Originally Posted by Bob4God

Nonsense brother, beat the hellfire out of her! In the old days a REAL man never hesitated to throw his wife a good beating, regardless of whether she was pregnant or not. Back then they didn't buy into all this liberal sissy sensitivity and tolerance foolishness. Pound her HARD.

My father used to slug momma in the gut when she was pregnant with me, and it taught her AND me a lesson! I turned out fine, so will your son!

EDIT: Brother Nobar has some good advice, but make sure she doesn't take a step-ladder into the shower with her to enable her to reach the mounted shower head.

Good Advise Brother

[John Bois Ward]

Originally Posted by JohnTheBaptist

Good Advise Brother

Did your momma fail to teach you any manners? Introduce yourself.

[icarus smith]

Originally Posted by Bob4God

My father used to slug momma in the gut when she was pregnant with me, and it taught her AND me a lesson! I turned out fine

i disagree, you sound like a backward redneck like most on this forum.

[Ramika]

I first must ask forgiveness for posting in the Men only forum, but I feel I have valuable information to share.

Husbands, even if you do not have a hand held shower nozzle, your wife may still be able to pleasure herself in the tub. Please don't allow your wives to bathe unsupervised. Or at the very least, not while the water is running.
She may be able to (and most likely WILL) position herself under the running water while the tub fills. This is as effective and perhaps even more so than using the hand held shower, depending on your household water pressure.
I have no personal experience with this, but I have heard other women talking about it in the lunchroom at work. They were shameless and I was scandalized by their open discussion of their sexuality!!

Women are weak, and if left alone they will stray from the path of righteousness.
Let us not forget that is was Eve that was tempted first in the Garden of Eden.

Again, I ask for forgiveness for posting here without prior permission, but I feel this information is vitally important for husbands to be aware of.

[joshkini]

Originally Posted by Brother_Dustin

Thank You Pastor.

Well, I have been paddling her daily since the incident and I have made her spend an hour and a half at the foot of her bed every morning and night. I also don't let her shower or bathe without me supervising her.
Due to the fact that she is pregnant with my fourth son, I've been going a little lighter on the beatings. Because of that I feel that she isn't being punished enough, what else could I do? I will not let her leave the house, except for grocery shopping, in which case I make my oldest son go with her, until I feel that the LORD has forgiven her. But how can I test her, to know that she has truly relieved from her sins?

Your Brother in Faith,
Dustin

What is wrong with you ? You are a coward and are more the monster you depict us atheist then the loving christian you pretend to be.

[Dr Laurence Niles]

Originally Posted by joshkini

What is wrong with you ? You are a coward and are more the monster you depict us atheist then the loving christian you pretend to be.

Who is trully the coward?

The sissy boy who lets his wife trample all over his God given right to be the head of his household as Jesus is the head of the Church or the man who stands up for his rights and for Jesus to help his wife do the right thing?

Your priorities are messed up

YIC

[Anon1858]

Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel

Daily paddlings, an hour in her Prayer closet each morning, and no more showers! Take out that demonic contraption and restrict her to baths from now on.

I'm not sure why a Christian Man would need advice on how to discipline his own wife.

Pastor Ezekiel, You are really hot man! :-*