question - Page 2

Witch Hammer · **Re: question -** 03-02-2013, 11:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bluish

At least I actually recognize and work on my faults. You guys are kind of oblivious

Keep beating your chest and trying to convince everyone how great you are, you posturing ape. Jesus knows your sins, and will condemn you for them eternally, unless you start backpedaling REAL QUICK...We are here to preach God's literal Word to you, filth. But you are obviously just hanging around to make a mockery of The Lord and exchange phone numbers with the other sodomites prancing around the forum fluffing their tails in Christ's face.

~~Bluish~~ · **Re: question -** 03-03-2013, 12:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Witch Hammer

Keep beating your chest and trying to convince everyone how great you are, you posturing ape. Jesus knows your sins, and will condemn you for them eternally, unless you start backpedaling REAL QUICK...We are here to preach God's literal Word to you, filth. But you are obviously just hanging around to make a mockery of The Lord and exchange phone numbers with the other sodomites prancing around the forum fluffing their tails in Christ's face.

I'm sorry.
I've been listening, I promise. I don't agree with how you go about performing your religion, but I've learned a lot about my own. I'm still trying to decide what I believe and what branch of Christianity I associate with, which is why I decided to join. I think I can safely cross Baptist off the list, but I feel a lot more enlightened about what the Bible really says.
I get frustrated sometimes, but please don't think that I'm only here to be an asshole.

Didymus Much · **Re: question -** 03-03-2013, 12:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bluish

...please don't think that I'm only here to be an asshole.

I was going to say something like "that position is already filled", but they'd misconstrue it completely.

Witch Hammer · **Re: question -** 03-03-2013, 01:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bluish

I think I can safely cross Baptist off the list

Then I think Jesus can safely scratch your name out of The Book of Life...

~~Bluish~~ · **Re: question -** 03-03-2013, 02:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Witch Hammer

Then I think Jesus can safely scratch your name out of The Book of Life...

:c
But.
But.
;~;
I follow every Word.
I'm a decent guy.

Witch Hammer · **Re: question -** 03-03-2013, 02:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bluish

:c
But.
But.
;~;
I follow every Word.
I'm a decent guy.

I'd be stuttering with fear as well, if I were in your position (ass up for satan). Being a 'decent guy' isn't nearly enough to keep you from playing bobbing-for-feces in the lake of fire. Learn the Word, Breathe the Word, Live the Word, Eat the Word...Teach the Word so you can help others to escape the bonds of SIN. That is what what it means to be Baptist. Anything else is just a mockery of True Christianity™. You could be loved by Jesus, too. As it stands now, He hates you, but the ball is in your court now. Give Jesus a reason not to throw you headlong into hellfire...start taking the Bible as seriously as a heart attack. Hell will be full of fair-weather Christians who were 'decent guys', but not decent enough to give due respect to Baby Jesus.

~~turdbear~~ · **Re: question -** 03-04-2013, 10:38 PM

Bluish, just to let you know, Landover is not an actual representation of most Baptist churches. Actually, and I can say this because I am one myself, they'd shake their heads pretty hard at this site and its ilk. Of course there are a lot of off-the-wall Baptists the same as any other group, and i won't deny that, as I've come across some whoppers, but we're not all like that.

BelieverInGod · **Re: question -** 03-04-2013, 11:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by teddybear

Bluish, just to let you know, Landover is not an actual representation of most Baptist churches. Actually, and I can say this because I am one myself, they'd shake their heads pretty hard at this site and its ilk. Of course there are a lot of off-the-wall Baptists the same as any other group, and i won't deny that, as I've come across some whoppers, but we're not all like that.

He's been banned, he's not going to get your offer for sympathy sodomy.

~~turdbear~~ · **Re: question -** 03-05-2013, 02:01 AM

Eww, I don't think so. Also, what did he do to get banned?

BelieverInGod · **Re: question -** 03-05-2013, 02:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by teddybear

Eww, I don't think so. Also, what did he do to get banned?

Who knows. Maybe something turned up in the DoF research. Maybe he threatened one of the Pastors since they're the only people unsaved trash can contact off the board. Or maybe he posted a bunch of porn or something that got deleted before we saw it.

You just have to put faith in the Pastors that they know what they're doing.

~~turdbear~~ · **Re: question -** 03-05-2013, 02:21 AM

What's DoF?

BelieverInGod · **Re: question -** 03-05-2013, 02:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by teddybear

What's DoF?

Department of Faith

They do background checks, and other security stuff for the church.

Trust me, they are very thorough. Especially when you move and want to join the church.

~~turdbear~~ · **Re: question -** 03-05-2013, 02:53 AM

Ah, I see.

Shimei · **Re: question -** 03-05-2013, 03:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BelieverInGod

Department of Faith

They do background checks, and other security stuff for the church.

Trust me, they are very thorough. Especially when you move and want to join the church.

Are you speaking of a real physical church or an online church like this forum that has membership?

I was just wondering (not that I place emphasis on the label) but, when will I be able to join, become a member, or have I been rejected for Christian fellowship?

I attest to a clean record, having been baptized only a couple weeks ago. I am confident that my record is thoroughly clean, having walked cautiously since then - teehee

Praise Him!!!

BelieverInGod · **Re: question -** 03-05-2013, 03:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shimei

Are you speaking of a real physical church or an online church like this forum that has membership?

I was just wondering (not that I place emphasis on the label) but, when will I be able to join, become a member, or have I been rejected for Christian fellowship?

I attest to a clean record, having been baptized only a couple weeks ago. I am confident that my record is thoroughly clean, having walked cautiously since then - teehee

Praise Him!!!

Talk to the Pastors, I'm just a housewife and don't make any of the decisions around here.

Didymus Much · **Re: question -** 03-05-2013, 03:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shimei

...I was just wondering (not that I place emphasis on the label) but, when will I be able to join, become a member, or have I been rejected for Christian fellowship?...

It can take a while; after all, they do have to go back ten generations:

Deuteronomy 23:2-3 "2 A bastard shall not enter into the congregation of the LORD; even to his tenth generation shall he not enter into the congregation of the LORD. 3 An Ammonite or Moabite shall not enter into the congregation of the LORD; even to their tenth generation shall they not enter into the congregation of the LORD for ever:"

Any Ammonites or Moabites lurking in your woodpile?

Shimei · **Re: question -** 03-05-2013, 03:38 AM

Thanks, true, this may take quite awhile to determine. My true name is an adopted name. However, after a few weeks ago, I have come to understand that I have been adopted once again - Squeaky clean.

Praise Him!!!

Pastor Ezekiel · **Re: question -** 03-05-2013, 04:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shimei

Are you speaking of a real physical church or an online church like this forum that has membership?

I was just wondering (not that I place emphasis on the label) but, when will I be able to join, become a member, or have I been rejected for Christian fellowship?

I attest to a clean record, having been baptized only a couple weeks ago. I am confident that my record is thoroughly clean, having walked cautiously since then - teehee

Praise Him!!!

Dear chink-loving race-traitor;

Post the link to the church where you were Baptized, or apologize to Jesus for lying.

I'll wait.

YIC,

--Pastor Ezekiel

Shimei · **Re: question -** 03-05-2013, 04:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel

Dear chink-loving race-traitor;

Post the link to the church where you were Baptized, or apologize to Jesus for lying.

I'll wait.

YIC,

--Pastor Ezekiel

GateWay

BelieverInGod · **Re: question -** 03-05-2013, 04:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shimei

GateWay

Oh my

Your children will have a blast with interactive Bible lessons, rockin' worship songs, and fun-filled activities.

you'll hear the worship band playing worship songs from a variety of musical genres.

Our Bible study time is more conversational than "preachy."

Quote:

We further believe there is but one true interpretation of Scripture, although there may be several applications. The true meaning lies in the text and is that which the divinely-guided author willed to convey. It is recoverable through careful application of a literal (grammatical, historical, contextual) method of interpretation under the guidance of the Holy Spirit, and in the community of Christ. The Holy Spirit illumines the text, enabling the reader to embrace the significance of what God has communicated, and to see the glory of Christ in the Word of God.

Exactly what version are they "interpreting"?