[Witch Hammer]

As a True Christian, I am ever seeking to know more about my Savior and creator of the world, Jesus Christ.

God drops several provocative hints about Himself in the Bible, which any true scholar of The Word™ should be able to decipher with ease.

Firstly, nobody can question the fact that God, being a male Himself, is all about the supremacy of man over lesser forms of life like women, children and animals. As God uses His masculinity to keep man in thrall, so man uses his to keep his subjects in check.

And what makes a man a man? His God-given trouser trout, of course. It is much more than a simple tool for seeding the wife...it is the highest badge of authority!

How Grand then must be Christ's junk!

"Thy rod and thy staff comfort me". See Psalms 23:4

A thinly veiled reference to Christ's bifurcated splendor, I believe.

Also, we know from the Bible that Christ is God, and is also the Son of God. It is also known that male children inherit both length and girth from from their father. So logically, if Jesus is His own father, and God is His own son...and they are actually the same person...then their (His) penises must be immense beyond all mortal reckoning! The glorious c0¢k-shine of either member of His heavenly package would surely smite anyone who leered at them (which would be rude of course) with blindness.

God is also known to be omnipresent, meaning He is everywhere in space and time ALWAYS. This opens up the possibility that Jesus could actually have an infinite number of penises, or perhaps just two infinitely large penises...

[WWJDnow]

This reminds me of Exodus 17:5:

And the Lord said unto Moses, Go on before the people, and take with thee of the elders of Israel; and thy rod, wherewith thou smotest the river, take in thine hand, and go. Behold, I will stand before thee there upon the rock in Horeb; and thou shalt smite the rock, and there shall come water out of it, that the people may drink...

You know, this may not be the most profitable line of inquiry. Forget that I said anything.

[M. Mansfield, MD]

I should like to take another vantage point in this discussion. Since we worship a triune God, would that not then make the numbers of appendages six? And since seven is the perfect number of God, does that not then cast doubt upon the theory? I do not think our Lord would stop at six, being the number of imperfection and the unholy one.

I did like where WWJDnow was going and encourage you to continue. It was just getting good, brother.

Doc

[Old Man Hatchet]

That last point about God's omnipresence translating into an infinite number of dongs is especially intriguing. Every twig has its berries. That means that there are an infinite number of manberries as well, and they're everywhere. It's like we're all kids in an amusement park ball pit. What fun!



Let us rejoice and frolic in God's divine scrotal fruit.

[Arvellas]

This is not news to me. I'm always surrounded by dongs.