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Question Demon infested colons? - 04-01-2010, 11:16 AM

I think there's a demon in my colon. Can someone point me to something in the bible?

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Matthew:
5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.


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Last edited by Jeb Stuart Thurmond; 04-10-2010 at 01:56 PM. Reason: IMAGE REMOVED
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Default Re: demon infested colons - 04-01-2010, 11:27 AM

On this topic I have found you can fart like a harp:

Quote:
Originally Posted by God
"11": Wherefore my bowels shall sound like an harp for Moab, and mine inward parts for Kir-haresh.
Isaiah, chapter 16

God can cause you to poop to death:

Quote:
Originally Posted by God
2 Chronicles, chapter 21

"15": And thou shalt have great sickness by disease of thy bowels, until thy bowels fall out by reason of the sickness day by day
I found an S&M enema orgy:
Quote:
Originally Posted by God
Numbers, chapter 5

"22": And this water that causeth the curse shall go into thy bowels, to make thy belly to swell, and thy thigh to rot: And the woman shall say, Amen, amen.


Matthew:
5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.


http://www.shangrala.org/Pictures/Christ%20Michael.jpg

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Default Re: demon infested colons - 04-01-2010, 11:46 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by eliot mayfield View Post
God can cause you to shit to death:

2 Chronicles, chapter 21

"15": And thou shalt have great sickness by disease of thy bowels, until thy bowels fall out by reason of the sickness day by day
Who needs ex-lax when you have the Lord?
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Default Re: demon infested colons - 04-01-2010, 12:50 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Enoch View Post
Who needs ex-lax when you have the Lord?
Now I know why my my stupid catholic brother keeps a bible in his toilet.


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that he killed his only son so I can live forever.



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Default Re: demon infested colons - 04-01-2010, 01:06 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Luci Mourningstar View Post
Now I know why my my stupid catholic brother keeps a bible in his toilet.
Had this book in my can a few years ago, good reading.



Very informative.

Best read in short doses, with the proper aroma to accent it.

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Default Re: demon infested colons - 04-01-2010, 01:51 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by eliot mayfield View Post
On this topic I have found you can fart like a harp
"11": Wherefore my bowels shall sound like an harp for Moab, [...]
Isaiah, chapter 16.
Nave's Bible Topics says,
Quote:
Harp for Moab Isa:16:11:- The Harp for Moab is generally accepted as referring to an inferior instrument. Gerhardt Leibinger described it as. "A poor quality stringed instrument, which when plucked, has its tone marred by intense and irregular bass notes and vibrations."





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Default Re: demon infested colons - 04-01-2010, 05:57 PM

And here I thought it was because I had my gallbladder removed.

Darn it, going to a secular doctor put demons in my gut!


Drama queen

Last edited by Jeb Stuart Thurmond; 04-10-2010 at 02:00 PM.
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