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Default Re: 10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER! - 12-10-2017, 01:59 AM

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Originally Posted by WinnerNotSinner View Post
Nice work, Cranky. I take it this whole World Cup charade has got on your nerves too?

A soccer tournament is like a competition of "who's the gayest". 80 minutes of the game is wasted with passing it amongst defenders, and the final 10 is of people falling over for sympathy!

I am British, but it annoys the hell out of me when people refer to this girls game as "football". It's soccer! It's only fair the name "football" is blessed to the superior American counterpart and the sport favoured by Jesus. The hooligan supporters try to overcompensate for the games lack of manliness by being as aggressive and barbaric as possible, but only really succeeding in showing their clear homosexuality of willing to fight over 11 men chasing a ball in tight shorts.
let me just leave this picture here.
(football seems pretty gay to me my dudes.)
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Default Re: 10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER! - 12-11-2017, 06:57 PM

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Originally Posted by Shesmycherrypie View Post
let me just leave this picture here.
(football seems pretty gay to me my dudes.)
I agree with your picture, football is getting gayer since they let the nigroes in.


Also they are losing audience. Most of all for opposing the great Donald Trump (best president EVER, and also best TV host EVER)


1 Thessalonians 4:16 For the Lord himself shall descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the TRUMP of God: and the dead in Christ shall rise first.
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Default Re: 10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER! - 02-02-2018, 07:14 AM

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Default I couldn't believe it: AN ACTUAL PILLOW BITING DEMONSTRATION - 02-02-2018, 07:29 AM



but from a nation producing THIS anything is possible

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Default Re: 10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER! - 02-02-2018, 06:49 PM

This post may be old, but it still rings true. No wonder all of my Gay coworkers would play soccer every Sunday...


NOTE: Despite similarities in likeness and name, I am NOT famous Evangelist speaker Jack Redmond. That is a DIFFERENT Jack Redmond.
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Default Re: 10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER! - 02-09-2018, 09:20 AM

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Originally Posted by Cranky Old Man View Post
10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER!


There is a reason why God's favorite nation America could care less about soccer while Hell bound nations like Australia, Iceland, Holland, New Zealand, Ireland, and Denmark are all playing soccer (some even dare to call it football) all the time. While Americans play God's chosen sports like Baseball, American Football and Basketball the rest of the world is pleasing Satan with soccer. Everyone either involved or interested in soccer will burn in Hell for all eternity.

1st Corinthians 10:31 "Whether therefore ye eat, or drink, or whatsoever ye do, do all to the glory of God."

#1 Soccer is all about lying and cheating!
The most common way to win a soccer match is to trick the referee into giving you a penalty by feigning an injury, to make it appear as if a foul has been committed. Soccer players are specialized in dropping down and pretending to be hurt. They study children of 3 years or younger to learn how to perfect this technique. If the match is very important, like a world championship, they usually just bribe the referee to win. Proverbs 6:16-19 "... the LORD hate ... a lying tongue ... A false witness that speaketh lies ..."

#2 Soccer players want to be treated like prophets!
Too weak or slow to play football? Play soccer. Too short or slow to play basketball? Play soccer. Even though soccer doesn't require any athletic talent or advanced motor skills, soccer players somehow convinced themselves to be very special. Huge crowds of drunk soccer fans worship these arrogant brats as if they are Jesus Christ Himself. Matthew 24:24 "... false prophets ... deceive the very elect."

#3 Soccer is mostly about sex and drugs!
In 1974 the Dutch lost the World Championship soccer because their players had so much sex and drugs before the world cup final with Germany that they forgot to show up. Someone even wrote a book about it! Ephesians 5:18 "... be not drunk ..."

#4 Soccer players are extremely lazy!
If you have a very strong stomach and you can watch soccer for a few minutes without puking your guts out, just pay attention to a single player. It doesn't matter which one. Most of the time this player will either be standing still, or slowly walking from one place to another. If you look even closer you will notice all players only cover a small part of the playing field to minimize the chance of getting tired to an absolute minimum. Proverbs 12:24 "... the lazy man ..."

#5 Soccer prevents people from going to Church!
Most soccer training and soccer matches are on Sundays! Satan deliberately designed soccer this way to doom as much people as possible to Hell by preventing them from going to Church! Acts 20:17 "... the elders of the church."

#6 Soccer makes people gay!
Soccer is all about grown man hugging and touching each other in ways only gays would approve off. The favorite part of a soccer match is when the actual match is over and all players can get naked together in a huge shower. There is not a single soccer player in the world who is not gay. It's reasons like this that make ultra-gays like Sir Elton John a soccer fan! Romans 1:26-27 "... burned in their lust one toward another; men with men working that which is unseemly ..."


#7 God has sent us many signs He hates Soccer!
God has warned humanity many times by sending crystal clear signs that He hates soccer! Clear signs like the Heyse Stadium disaster, the Hillsborough disaster, the Orkney Stadium Disaster, the Ellis Park Stadium Disaster and the Accra Sports Stadium Disaster leave 0% room for doubt that God hates soccer with a vengeance! Luke 18:27 "... The things which are impossible with men are possible with God."

#8 Soccer supporters are extremely violent!
If a bunch of soccer hooligans would have attacked Afghanistan, we would have won already! Soccer violence is without limits and is the most extreme form of violence known to man. Soccer hooligans are all totally insane psychopaths who completely lose every shred of humanity. Psalm 73:6 "... violence covereth them as a garment ..."

#9 Soccer and fascism are actually the same thing!
No one in their right mind can deny the connection between soccer and fascism. It is very common for soccer fans to wear Nazi symbols and to shout Nazi insults during soccer matches. In German concentration camps zyklon was used to kill as many Jews as possible. For this reason Umbro named their extremely popular soccer shoe Zyklon!

The English (!) soccer team in 1938:


#10 France is successful at soccer!

And to prove for once and for all that God really really hates soccer, just note that France is successful at soccer! Psalm 9:17 "... all the nations that forget God."

All people wasting time on soccer need to repent and accept Jesus Christ as their savior! Until then, they will suffer and they will burn in Hell along with people wasting time on Tennis, Golf, Cricket, Gymnastics, Swimming, Ice Skating, Lacrosse, Curling, Rugby, Softball, Cycling, Hiking, Horse Racing, Skiing, Snowboarding, Triathlon, Wrestling, etc.
This post is so old. Eight years ago. But I'm going to break it down for anyone who reads this:


#1 Soccer is all about lying and cheating... I would say it's about winning. Cheating is when the referee has been paid to "overlook" certain actions such as pushing, kicking and injuring others. If they pretend to have an injury I wouldn't consider it cheating. Lying yes some do lie, but not all of them. Saying that literally all of them lie is generalizing. Cheating no. Because if it was cheating, it would've been banned to fake injuries a long time ago. But they didn't ban it because, firstly, that will hardly give the opposing team a disadvantage unless they are really good actors and, secondly, their team will have one player less.


#2 Soccer players want to be treated like prophets... No. The reason for my answer is, because they never claimed it. You claimed it. They didn't. So I say no. Why are they "worshipped" by "drunk" soccer fans? Well, not all of them drink. Again, that's generalizing. To answer the actual question, because they're proud of their country. If their country wins the championship, then they're worshipped by SOME atheists. Notice how I said some. Pay close attention. Because not all Atheists like Soccer. Period.


#3 Soccer is mostly about Sex and Drugs... One, single, example... From over fourty years ago. It's like, I will invite you to my house. We'll have a bible reading session and we'll do that for many many years. Then one day I'll say "I'll go make some tea" and you suddenly claim "Oh man, he and his children and all the others that know him and will know him in the future are tea addicts." So no, it's not about sex and drugs. It's about winning and earning money and fame. If they don't win, they don't earn as much as they were promised. If you have more examples instead of only one single example from over fourty years ago, I'll be glad you list them.


#4 Soccer players are extremely lazy... Also a solid no. It's about strategy. You think that all soccer players are primitive and all 22 players should run after the ball at once? Think again. They return to their position in defense or offense. Otherwise it's not strategic. Strategy wins. You should know that, that's common sense. Besides, I want to see you running around for 90 minutes nonstop without breaking a sweat.


#5 Soccer prevents people from going to church... Who said that atheists are supposed to go to church if they're atheists? In this particular forum I found out that you all hate atheists. You never claim it but the hate is much stronger of you hating them than them hating you. They don't hate who they don't know. But you don't know them and hate them already. How about you try "To love your neighbor as yourself" -Mark 12:31
It is deliberately played on a sunday as more people are free from work and selling tickets is how they earn money. It is their job so they earn money at all. Which means they are WORKING on a sunday. I don't see you working on a sunday.


#6 Soccer makes people gay... So you're saying, just because they hug, because they have the joy of winning or scoring, they are automatically gay? Who gave you the rights to decide what sexuality they have? I touch my door handle all the time to open the door. Am I attracted to a door handle now? "There is no single soccer player who is not gay." That's something you can not determine unless you ask them personally about their sexuality.


#7 God has sent us many signs he hates Soccer... Heysel Stadium: It was the fault of humanity. I admit, those fans who caused this are stupid. Hillsborough: Again, the fault of the human mind. Disaster occured because one police chief opened the gate to an already overcrowded stadium. Poor decision making. Oppenheimer Stadium: Basic knowledge.. Referee saw a flaw, whistled the goal as not valid, supporters of the opposite team got angry. It was again, mankind's fault. Ellis Park Stadium: Overcrowding. That are fans showing up to an already full stadium. They paid for a ticket and wanted to see the match. Those are all signs of poor decision making and shortsightedness. Besides, if God really hated it, then why does he not kill all soccer players and instead the fanbase? No players, no fans. Common sense again.


#8 Soccer supporters are extremely violent... SOME are. Not all. Stop generalizing. Stereotyping others is an insult. And that is the opposite of "Love your neighbor as yourself".


#9 Soccer and Fascism are actually the same thing... Okay, this is my favorite part. Now, how can I phrase this? Oh, yes. This is one single person, designing a Shoe. This one single person being forced to apologize for designing a SHOE that had the name Zyklon doesn't prove that soccer players are fascists. Besides, do some research, ZYKLON is german and means CYCLONE which is a type of STORM. And I'm not talking about STORMING THE FRONT OF ANOTHER COUNTRY! Also that one picture of England saluting to Germans is a way of respect they showed to the German team ONE YEAR BEFORE the horrible WWII began. They could not have possibly known that Germany would start a war this big. Nobody, not even you, not a single person on earth, is capable of predicting the future. God alone is. And he is not telling anyone when what will happen.


#10 France is most successful... Was.. most successful. Currently it's Germany. Or "The fascists" as you'd say. Again, generalizing others without knowing them personally. All people wasting time on soccer...? So you've clearly forgotten how atheists work. They don't believe in God. That's what Atheists are like. They're not satanists. They're Atheists. You're generalizing again. Not everyone has YOUR believes. You can't tell a buddist to suddenly believe in your religion as it is against their religion. They can't tell you to believe in their religion as it is against your religion. That's how religion works. It's all about the WILL OF THE INDIVIDUAL who chooses to believe whatever religion they choose. "...they will suffer and they will burn in Hell along with people wasting time on Tennis, Golf, Cricket, Gymnastics, Swimming, Ice Skating, Lacrosse, Curling, Rugby, Softball, Cycling, Hiking, Horse Racing, Skiing, Snowboarding, Triathlon, Wrestling, etc." I don't see you being physically active as you had time to write all of this. Physical activities are necessary to stay healthy. Also who allowed you to judge who will and will not end up in hell?


Matthew 7:1-2 “1 Do not judge, or you too will be judged. 2 For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.“


James 4:11 “11 Do not speak evil against one another, brothers. The one who speaks against a brother or judges his brother, speaks evil against the law and judges the law. But if you judge the law, you are not a doer of the law but a judge. 12 There is only one lawgiver and judge, he who is able to save and to destroy. But who are you to judge your neighbor?“


Congratulation, sir, you've just commited a sin. And I'm not judging you. I'm stating facts, debunking your hate speech. And yes, sir, you are a hater. Hate is also a sin. You've sinned multiple times by just posting all of this.


"If you find someone who loves God, stay with them. If you find someone who doesn't know God, show them the way. If you find someone who speaks evil, tell them to apologize. If you find someone who doesn't want to believe, don't waste your time with them."


I could go on and on and on. You're so blinded. Just recently I've found an old Poll in this forum, asking people if they're 100% true believers.
The majority says they're "True Christians" but after reading this it makes it clear that the majority picks what they want to believe in the bible, making you a false Christian as you'd call yourselves. And if you're trying to convince me you're a true believer, then stop cherry-picking verses from the bible and stop avoiding verses which speak against your speech. I'm talking about judging others, generalizing others, claiming they're all one and the same stereotype. I am angry. But so was Jesus when he found people cherry-picking verses from the bible so they could have a reason to do whatever they want, and completely forget about the laws.


That goes for every single person in this forum. If you're a true believer, you talk to yourselves about yourselves. Stop involving others who have nothing to do with this. You don't know them as you don't know me. Maybe I'm a christian. Maybe I'm an atheist. Maybe I'm a buddist. Maybe I'm a muslim.
Do you know that? Do you TRULY and UTTERLY believe that you know who I am? That you know who THEY are? You're judging the book by it's cover. You're being hateful towards unknown people. People that never met you. People that never did anything to you. You're being hateful in general. And hate is a strong sin. Work that away and I might forgive you and that might help you realize what you've done.
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Default Re: 10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER! - 02-09-2018, 09:54 AM

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Originally Posted by handmaiden View Post
Not only is soccer a kids game, but some of the kids playing it are girls!

Any sport that can be played by girls that boys also play is , by definition, gay.
I just have to laugh at this ridiculous comment. You, sir are being a sexist. You breathe air the same way girls do. This means you're gay. You are walking on two legs. Guess who's also walking on two legs. A girl! You are gay, sir. You can talk. Girls can also talk. You are gay. You can write and read. Girls also can write and read. You are gay. You have emotions. Girls also have emotions! Who knew? You are gay!
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Default Re: 10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER! - 02-09-2018, 11:47 AM

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Originally Posted by JustRichard View Post
#1...#10...
You are 10 times wrong. Next time try READING something before you reply to it.

Quote:
Matthew 7:1-2 “1 Do not judge, or you too will be judged. 2 For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.“
I don't mind being judged as I am free of sin. (1st John 1:7, Revelation 1:5, 1st John 3:9)

Quote:
James 4:11 “11 Do not speak evil against one another, brothers. The one who speaks against a brother or judges his brother, speaks evil against the law and judges the law. But if you judge the law, you are not a doer of the law but a judge.
I never speak evil. I always speak the truth.

Quote:
12 There is only one lawgiver and judge, he who is able to save and to destroy. But who are you to judge your neighbor?“
You are not my neighbor. My actual neighbor died when her house suddenly burned down.

Quote:
Congratulation, sir, you've just commited a sin. And I'm not judging you.
You ARE judging me by FALSELY claiming I sin. You are a LIAR as is PROVEN by your post here and you will burn in Hell with all the other liars. Sad! (Mark 16:16, Revelation 21:8, John 15:6, John 14:6)


CANCER is a state of mind! Time to stop ALL healthcare!!!
Follow me on Twitter or burn in Hell for all eternity!

To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."
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Default Re: 10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER! - 02-09-2018, 11:56 AM

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Originally Posted by JustRichard View Post
I just have to laugh at this ridiculous comment. You, sir are being a sexist.
Handmaiden is a woman not a man. You yourself are the sexist by assuming her gender.


I Jesus!
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Default Re: 10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER! - 02-14-2018, 11:33 PM

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Handmaiden is a woman not a man. You yourself are the sexist by assuming her gender.
Thank you, sweet Felicity, for defending my honor.

While I am here, I would like to point out some other problems with JustRichard's post.

This person accuses me of being sexist. I have heard black people insist that while black people can be prejudiced, they cannot-- by definition-- be racist. So, I'm going to assume that a woman cannot--by definition-- be sexist.

This person didn't just assume my gender based on my God-granted point of view that girls are not on an equal level with boys, this person failed to note that my name is Handmaiden.

That is just plain dumb. To re-use a turn of phrase from above -- a boy can be a virgin, but a boy can never be a maiden. It's as simple as understanding that while both cats and dogs can have babies, cats can't have puppies and dogs can't have kittens.

Unless, of course, evil Liebral scientists are allowed to continue their work of perverting everything in God's creation into an abomination. It's not bad enough that they teach that God didn't create the universe. They want to overturn His creation to do things that He had the sense not to do!

But that's another outrage for another time. Forgive me for getting off track. Let's get back to being appalled by soccer. We should be able to shut that down before science gives us kuppies and pittens.


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Default Re: 10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER! - 02-15-2018, 02:59 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by JustRichard View Post
I just have to laugh at this ridiculous comment. You, sir are being a sexist. You breathe air the same way girls do. This means you're gay. You are walking on two legs. Guess who's also walking on two legs. A girl! You are gay, sir. You can talk. Girls can also talk. You are gay. You can write and read. Girls also can write and read. You are gay. You have emotions. Girls also have emotions! Who knew? You are gay!
I did smile a little but you could have psittacine body dysmorphia. You breathe air the same way parrots do. This means you wear vibrant plumed fascinators. You are walking on two legs. Guess who's also walking on two legs. A parrot! You are a parrot! You can talk. Parrots can also talk. You are oscillating as you read. You can squawk. Parrots also can squawk. You are a parrot. You have emotions. Parrots also have emotions! Who knew? You are a parrot!

Anyone who's heard a soccer player or manager or whatever they call themselves, when interviewed, what a very limited lexicon they have swallowed!
And to think that the English once so robust to invent this sport went the way of the Europeans who imported it.
I checked FIFA which might have had some idea and:

Quote:
In both Kingston-on-Thames and Chester, local legend has it the game was played there for the first time with the severed head of a vanquished Danish prince. In Derby, it is said to have originated in the third century during the victory celebrations that followed a battle against the Romans. Yet there is scant evidence of the sport having been played at this time, either in Saxon areas or on the continent.

So it's neither a Roman nor a continental game. The heads were an English innovation. But when garlic munchers discovered permanent waves and pigs bladders this once manly game descended to where it is today. Now as England is decoupling from the amphibian diet perhaps this once interesting pastime will resume its former status? Although someone took me to a performance one day several years ago I'm afraid to say I fell asleep so didn't see much, or any of it: when I woke up at the end still no-one had managed even a single goal. But with the heads back and suitable encouragement perhaps the game could be made great again? But for now, even with the simulated writhing and bleached tips, I'd rather watch paint dry. And if a dragonfly got stuck as a bonus there'd be some actual writhing, for anyone interested.
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Default Re: 10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER! - 02-16-2018, 07:23 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by handmaiden View Post
Thank you, sweet Felicity, for defending my honor.

While I am here, I would like to point out some other problems with JustRichard's post.

This person accuses me of being sexist. I have heard black people insist that while black people can be prejudiced, they cannot-- by definition-- be racist. So, I'm going to assume that a woman cannot--by definition-- be sexist.

This person didn't just assume my gender based on my God-granted point of view that girls are not on an equal level with boys, this person failed to note that my name is Handmaiden.
Ah become a feminist and cry about every single man being a sexist already. I simply didn't look at the name but I looked at the stupidity of your reply. And my point stands. If you 'assume' that soccer is gay, then breathing is also gay by your standards. That means you're a sexist. And who would've thought? Women CAN be sexist! By blaming men for everything they've done while it's not true. By assuming they're gay while it's not true. That IS being a sexist. The whole world says so, even christian but apparently not here.


And @Cranky Old Man,


Am I a liar? I simply stated facts. You take tiny examples and make a huge reason out of it. Basically you turned a fly into an elephant. But if you claim that those are reasons God hates soccer, then why don't you also point out that God hates the internet? Because you're using it! The whole world can see your linear way of thinking, running straight into a wall. The bible is NOT about hate. It's about believing in God. If you hate soccer, STOP SPREADING YOUR HATE AND MOVE ON!


@MitzaLizalor


It was a sarcastic statement to picture the standards of Handmaiden. At least you get my point.
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Default Re: 10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER! - 02-16-2018, 11:06 AM

Please try to stay on topic.
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Default Re: 10 Reasons why GOD HATES SOCCER! - 02-16-2018, 10:04 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by JustRichard View Post
Ah become a feminist and cry about every single man being a sexist already.
Moi? Cry about every man being a sexist? By the standards that the modern world touts, GOD is a sexist. I don't complain about the standards God has established in His Holy Word, but I do make an effort to explain those standards to those with rosy-tinted glasses that filter out the more challenging aspects of obediance to The Lord.

Quote:
Am I a liar?
Hmm, I am not prepared to decide on that at the moment. I do think that you are a standard-issue, run-of-the-mill, ill-informed Bible Misunderstander. You were also kind of mean to me, which makes me think you may be a douche.
Quote:
The bible is NOT about hate.
This is a typical talking point of the Bible Misunderstander. The Bible is not ONLY about hate, but there is a lot of hate in there expressed by God. Furthermore, in some verses of the Bible, we are commanded by God to hate. That is, you hate whom God tells you to hate, and God loves you in return. It's a very straightforward exchange actually.
Quote:
It's about believing in God.
Praise the Lord! This is the part you have right-- sort of. It's critical to believe, but self-defeating if you don't OBEY. That's another concept that people seem to miss.

You see, folks have all these ideas about God which they claim to have learned from the Bible, but they fairly wallow in their ignorance about what God is telling them to do right there in the very same book.

You do know that Satan believes in God far more firmly than any earthly being ever could, right? That's because Satan has met God, and talked to Him--even taunted Him on more than one occassion. You can read about this in the Book of Job and in the Gospels.

Look up Matthew and Luke, chapters 4. For some reason, Mark kind of glosses over the incident, and John doesn't mention it at all. Maybe God got tired of repeating Himself and needed Mark and John to cover some other details. Who knows? (Well, okay, God knows, but you catch my drift.)

Finally, to drive home the message that believing in God's existance isn't quite enough to secure the brass ring of God's favor, we have these verses.

James 2:19-20
Thou believest that there is one God; thou doest well: the devils also believe, and tremble. But wilt thou know, O vain man, that faith without works is dead?

At this juncture, I could do a whole treatise on the subject of "Faith versus Works". But why should I when James, himself, writes at length on the subject?

The take home of the two verses above is that everybody currently in hell--staff and consignees-- KNOWS that God exists with more certainty than any of us on the mortal plane. Neither the demons nor the damned are lacking in faith at this moment. The one thing they have in common is that they chose not to obey God.

So, saying that the Bible is about believing in God is like saying that cows are made of meat. It's a statement of fact; but you still have to decide what to do about it.

You can eat the meat and be strengthened.

Or you can decide that meat is murder and starve to death trying to eat weeds. (Which probably have cow poop on them anyway, so I don't know why you would do such a thing when you have a ton of steak standing right there in front of you.)


To sum up the lessons herein:

I don't expect a Real© Bible-Believing man to be anything but "sexist", and I don't waste my time complaining about sexism anyway, because, you know--God?

You really, really need to actually read the Bible for yourself before engaging in a discussion on the nature of God.

Aaand, regarding your statement below:

Quote:
If you hate soccer, STOP SPREADING YOUR HATE AND MOVE ON!
THIS IS NOT ACTUALLY ABOUT SOCCER, YOU DUFUS!

(Ahem.) Pardon me for shouting. Got a little carried away, there. Oh, one last thing:

Quote:
@MitzaLizalor
It was a sarcastic statement to picture the standards of Handmaiden. At least you get my point.
If your point is that you are missing the point, then. . . Yeah, we got that loud and clear.


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