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Reload this Page The Promise Enforcers Theme Song
Promise Enforcers - Men Only! We make Promise Keepers look like homers! No homosexuals or women allowed!

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Default The Promise Enforcers Theme Song - 02-09-2007, 04:16 PM

There really should be a theme song for The Promise Enforcers. I've tried my hand at songwriting with my wife Delores, but the results have only been so-so. You can't always get a song just right with a spinnet organ and a banjo.

Can anyone help with this? Father Mo, you cathylicks are pretty good with a tune.... Remy, you people have rhythm....
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Default Re: The Promise Enforcers Theme Song - 02-10-2007, 04:59 AM

And let it be our cree;
that God shall be;
in the favour of White...American...L.B.C. men!!!!!

Four our promise is this;
that we will never miss;
the opportunity to save the damned.....

We gather the love in such a heist;
For our good lord Jesus Christ;
as our Bibles shine proud from within our right hand.....

As our prayers gather in a whoooosh;
For the glory of George Bush;
And you can't spell American;
with out I......... CAN!

I can then shout aloud;
No homos and women allowed;
As this is why.....

ONE is Eve's sinning experiment;
and the other is Satan's excriment!!!!






--------------------

That's what I have so far.....Poetic Pete can hopefully help with the rest.
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Default Re: The Promise Enforcers Theme Song - 02-10-2007, 11:24 AM

I kind of like THIS song, only the fellow singing it seems to mumble alot. I can't catch the last part of some of those verses.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: The Promise Enforcers Theme Song - 02-10-2007, 12:22 PM

This is just the beginning, but I shall try to finish the words soon.

My eyes have seen the glory,
of the coming of the men.
We are marching to Lord,
as it always should have been.
No matter what you proplem is,
we know just what to do.
Our rods are whacking hard!

Glory glory, to the men folk
Glory glory, to the men folk
Glory glory, to the men folk
Our rods are in our hand!


"If thou buy an Hebrew servant, six years he shall serve: and in the seventh he shall go out free for nothing. . . . And if a man sell his daughter to be a maidservant, she shall not go out as the manservant's do."
(Leviticus 21:6-7)
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Default Re: The Promise Enforcers Theme Song - 02-10-2007, 04:50 PM

I know we Ladies aren't allowed in here, but when I heard all those Glorious, Manly voices raised in song, I just had to peek!

And there's that Good-looking Brother Carlton Green again, too!
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Default Re: The Promise Enforcers Theme Song - 02-11-2007, 01:03 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by SUV View Post
I know we Ladies aren't allowed in here, but when I heard all those Glorious, Manly voices raised in song, I just had to peek!

And there's that Good-looking Brother Carlton Green again, too!


Is that what it was?
I thought maybe Pastor Al's donkey had got loose again.


In order to be old & wise,you must first be young & stupid.
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Default Re: The Promise Enforcers Theme Song - 02-11-2007, 01:29 PM

Ello loves!!

Hmm...theme song for this wonderful MENnnn's group? Well let me jump right in with my suggestion:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uY67cYJDc9s

snicker...snicker.........


"I'm just a sweet transvestite from Transsexual, Transylvania."

"Don't dream it...BE IT!"
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Default Re: The Promise Enforcers Theme Song - 02-11-2007, 04:30 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by lilith View Post
Is that what it was?
I thought maybe Pastor Al's donkey had got loose again.

How dare you make fun of the manly voices of good Christian men. I'm surprised that your rating meter actually says "GODLY in the extreme" or else you would know better than to level men with donkeys. It ought to be "CHEEKY in the extreme!." Smarten up girl!
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Default Re: The Promise Enforcers Theme Song - 02-11-2007, 06:03 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Carlton Green View Post
How dare you make fun of the manly voices of good Christian men. I'm surprised that your rating meter actually says "GODLY in the extreme" or else you would know better than to level men with donkeys. It ought to be "CHEEKY in the extreme!." Smarten up girl!
I don't know what happened there, it must have been some kind of technical error. Anyway, it has now been fixed.


O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.


God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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Default Re: The Promise Enforcers Theme Song - 02-12-2007, 12:46 AM

I believe an adaptation of 'star trekkin' ' could work :

TC Trekkin' across the United States,
On the Starship Dumbass Males under the Pastors!
TC Trekkin' across the United States,
Never going forward nor do we go reverse!
Zeke, report.
There's women on the starboard bow, starboard bow, starboard bow;
there's women on the starboard bow, starboard bow, Al.
Analysis, Brother Temperance.
It's sin, Al, but not as we know it, not as we know it, not as we know it;
it's sin, Al, but not as we know it, not as we know it, Pastor.

There's heathens on the starboard bow, starboard bow, starboard bow;
there's heathens on the starboard bow, starboard bow, Al.
TC Trekkin' across the United States,
On the Starship Dumbass Males under the Pastors.
TC Trekkin' across the universe,
Never going forward, not even reverse.
Medical update, Dr Ernest.
It's worse than that, they're homers, Al, homers ,Al ,homers, Al;
it's worse than that, they're homers, Al, homers, Al, homers.

It's sin, Zeke, but not as we know it, not as we know it, not as we know it;
it's sin, Zeke, but not as we know it, not as we know it, Pastor.
There's women on the starboard bow, starboard bow, starboard bow;
there's women on the starboard bow, starboard bow, Jim.
Dumbass Captains,the Pastors :
Ah! We come for salvation, shoot to kill, shoot to kill, shoot to kill;
we come for salvation, shoot to kill, shoot to kill, men.
It's worse than that, they're homers, Al, homers, Al, homers, Al;
it's worse than that, they're homers, Al, homers, Al, homers.
Well, it's sin, Bobby Joe, but not as we know it, not as we know it, not as we know it;
it's sin, Bobby Joe, but not as we know it, not as we know it, Captain.
There's heathens on the starboard bow, starboard bow, starboard bow;
there's heathens on the starboard bow, scrape 'em off, OYK.
TC Trekkin' across the United States,
On the Starship Dumbass Males under the Pastors.
TC Trekkin' across the United States,
Never going forward, and things are getting worse!
Engineer, Enobarbus:
There's no such thing as the laws of physics, laws of physics, laws of physics;
There's no such thing the laws of physics, laws of physics, Al.
Ah! We come to save you, shoot to kill, shoot to kill, shoot to kill;
we come to save you, shoot to kill; BT, beam me up!
It's worse than that, they're homers, Zeke, homers, Zeke, homers, Zeke;
it's worse than that, they're homers, Zeke, homers, Zeke, homers.
Well, it's sin, Al, but not as we know it, not as we know it, not as we know it;
it's sin, Al, but not as we know it, not as we know it, Pastor.
There's heathens on the starboard bow, starboard bow, starboard bow;
there's heathens on the starboard bow, better calm down!
Ye cannot change the script Zeke.
Och, #!*& Prune Danish.
It's worse than that, it's physics, Al.
TC Trekkin' across the universe,
On the Starship Dumbass Males under the Pastors.
TC Trekkin' across the United States,
Never going forward, not even reverse. TC Trekkin' across the United States,
On the Starship Dumbass Males under the Pastors.
TC Trekkin' across the United States,
Never going forward, nor will we go reverse.


I hope you all appreciate the effort I went to to adapt that song just for you guys.



Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!

Last edited by Rachael Van Helsing; 02-12-2007 at 12:49 AM.
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Default Re: The Promise Enforcers Theme Song - 02-12-2007, 12:52 AM

That will cost you 1,000 infraction points, VanThunderthighs. And another 1,000 for being in our Male-only sanctuary again.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

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Default Re: The Promise Enforcers Theme Song - 02-12-2007, 12:54 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
That will cost you 1,000 infraction points, VanThunderthighs. And another 1,000 for being in our Male-only sanctuary again.
Ahhh....it was worth it.
(If anyone is just catching up, see the previous page of this thread to see how well I think an adaptation of 'Star Trekkin' ' will work for the theme song. )



Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!
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Default Re: The Promise Enforcers Theme Song - 02-12-2007, 01:29 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
I believe an adaptation of 'star trekkin' ' could work :

TC Trekkin' across the United States,
On the Starship Dumbass Males under the Pastors!
TC Trekkin' across the United States,
Never going forward nor do we go reverse!
Zeke, report.
There's women on the starboard bow, starboard bow, starboard bow;
there's women on the starboard bow, starboard bow, Al.
Analysis, Brother Temperance.
It's sin, Al, but not as we know it, not as we know it, not as we know it;
it's sin, Al, but not as we know it, not as we know it, Pastor.

There's heathens on the starboard bow, starboard bow, starboard bow;
there's heathens on the starboard bow, starboard bow, Al.
TC Trekkin' across the United States,
On the Starship Dumbass Males under the Pastors.
TC Trekkin' across the universe,
Never going forward, not even reverse.
Medical update, Dr Ernest.
It's worse than that, they're homers, Al, homers ,Al ,homers, Al;
it's worse than that, they're homers, Al, homers, Al, homers.

It's sin, Zeke, but not as we know it, not as we know it, not as we know it;
it's sin, Zeke, but not as we know it, not as we know it, Pastor.
There's women on the starboard bow, starboard bow, starboard bow;
there's women on the starboard bow, starboard bow, Jim.
Dumbass Captains,the Pastors :
Ah! We come for salvation, shoot to kill, shoot to kill, shoot to kill;
we come for salvation, shoot to kill, shoot to kill, men.
It's worse than that, they're homers, Al, homers, Al, homers, Al;
it's worse than that, they're homers, Al, homers, Al, homers.
Well, it's sin, Bobby Joe, but not as we know it, not as we know it, not as we know it;
it's sin, Bobby Joe, but not as we know it, not as we know it, Captain.
There's heathens on the starboard bow, starboard bow, starboard bow;
there's heathens on the starboard bow, scrape 'em off, OYK.
TC Trekkin' across the United States,
On the Starship Dumbass Males under the Pastors.
TC Trekkin' across the United States,
Never going forward, and things are getting worse!
Engineer, Enobarbus:
There's no such thing as the laws of physics, laws of physics, laws of physics;
There's no such thing the laws of physics, laws of physics, Al.
Ah! We come to save you, shoot to kill, shoot to kill, shoot to kill;
we come to save you, shoot to kill; BT, beam me up!
It's worse than that, they're homers, Zeke, homers, Zeke, homers, Zeke;
it's worse than that, they're homers, Zeke, homers, Zeke, homers.
Well, it's sin, Al, but not as we know it, not as we know it, not as we know it;
it's sin, Al, but not as we know it, not as we know it, Pastor.
There's heathens on the starboard bow, starboard bow, starboard bow;
there's heathens on the starboard bow, better calm down!
Ye cannot change the script Zeke.
Och, #!*& Prune Danish.
It's worse than that, it's physics, Al.
TC Trekkin' across the universe,
On the Starship Dumbass Males under the Pastors.
TC Trekkin' across the United States,
Never going forward, not even reverse. TC Trekkin' across the United States,
On the Starship Dumbass Males under the Pastors.
TC Trekkin' across the United States,
Never going forward, nor will we go reverse.


I hope you all appreciate the effort I went to to adapt that song just for you guys.

EXCELLENT!! It gets my vote!


In order to be old & wise,you must first be young & stupid.
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Default Re: The Promise Enforcers Theme Song - 02-12-2007, 02:19 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by lilith View Post
EXCELLENT!! It gets my vote!
*bows*
Why thankyou
It fits well, doesn't it?



Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!

Last edited by Rachael Van Helsing; 02-12-2007 at 02:19 AM.
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Default Re: The Promise Enforcers Theme Song - 02-12-2007, 03:03 AM

While none of the Pastors are looking, I must say, that's quite a song, Sister!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
I believe an adaptation of 'star trekkin' ' could work :

TC Trekkin' across the United States,
On the Starship Dumbass Males under the Pastors!
TC Trekkin' across the United States,
Never going forward nor do we go reverse!
Zeke, report.
There's women on the starboard bow, starboard bow, starboard bow;
there's women on the starboard bow, starboard bow, Al.
Analysis, Brother Temperance.
It's sin, Al, but not as we know it, not as we know it, not as we know it;
it's sin, Al, but not as we know it, not as we know it, Pastor.

There's heathens on the starboard bow, starboard bow, starboard bow;
there's heathens on the starboard bow, starboard bow, Al.
TC Trekkin' across the United States,
On the Starship Dumbass Males under the Pastors.
TC Trekkin' across the universe,
Never going forward, not even reverse.
Medical update, Dr Ernest.
It's worse than that, they're homers, Al, homers ,Al ,homers, Al;
it's worse than that, they're homers, Al, homers, Al, homers.

It's sin, Zeke, but not as we know it, not as we know it, not as we know it;
it's sin, Zeke, but not as we know it, not as we know it, Pastor.
There's women on the starboard bow, starboard bow, starboard bow;
there's women on the starboard bow, starboard bow, Jim.
Dumbass Captains,the Pastors :
Ah! We come for salvation, shoot to kill, shoot to kill, shoot to kill;
we come for salvation, shoot to kill, shoot to kill, men.
It's worse than that, they're homers, Al, homers, Al, homers, Al;
it's worse than that, they're homers, Al, homers, Al, homers.
Well, it's sin, Bobby Joe, but not as we know it, not as we know it, not as we know it;
it's sin, Bobby Joe, but not as we know it, not as we know it, Captain.
There's heathens on the starboard bow, starboard bow, starboard bow;
there's heathens on the starboard bow, scrape 'em off, OYK.
TC Trekkin' across the United States,
On the Starship Dumbass Males under the Pastors.
TC Trekkin' across the United States,
Never going forward, and things are getting worse!
Engineer, Enobarbus:
There's no such thing as the laws of physics, laws of physics, laws of physics;
There's no such thing the laws of physics, laws of physics, Al.
Ah! We come to save you, shoot to kill, shoot to kill, shoot to kill;
we come to save you, shoot to kill; BT, beam me up!
It's worse than that, they're homers, Zeke, homers, Zeke, homers, Zeke;
it's worse than that, they're homers, Zeke, homers, Zeke, homers.
Well, it's sin, Al, but not as we know it, not as we know it, not as we know it;
it's sin, Al, but not as we know it, not as we know it, Pastor.
There's heathens on the starboard bow, starboard bow, starboard bow;
there's heathens on the starboard bow, better calm down!
Ye cannot change the script Zeke.
Och, #!*& Prune Danish.
It's worse than that, it's physics, Al.
TC Trekkin' across the universe,
On the Starship Dumbass Males under the Pastors.
TC Trekkin' across the United States,
Never going forward, not even reverse. TC Trekkin' across the United States,
On the Starship Dumbass Males under the Pastors.
TC Trekkin' across the United States,
Never going forward, nor will we go reverse.


I hope you all appreciate the effort I went to to adapt that song just for you guys.
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Default Re: The Promise Enforcers Theme Song - 02-12-2007, 03:22 AM

SUV,

We Christian men can view any message as much as we please.

Now go to your husband so he can spank some common sense into you!






Yours in Christ, Rev. Green
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Default Re: The Promise Enforcers Theme Song - 02-12-2007, 03:49 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by SUV View Post
While none of the Pastors are looking, I must say, that's quite a song, Sister!
Why thankyou SUV. I call it 'TC Trekkin' .



Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!
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Default Re: The Promise Enforcers Theme Song - 02-12-2007, 04:34 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
I believe an adaptation of 'star trekkin' ' could work :

TC Trekkin' across the United States, blah, blah...rude song
Damn you Woman!

That was horrendous!

How dare you make fun of our GODLY men! I am particularly appauled you highlighted my precious angel Pastor Zeke.

I've got my eye on you, you wanton Hussy!

Stay away from my man!

I'm going to go find Pastor Al and bring abomination to his attention. Why, he is almost as close to GOD as JESUS and THIS is what you do?

Enjoy Hell!

Disgusted, Sister Thumper




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Last edited by Daisy Mae Johnson; 02-12-2007 at 04:35 PM.
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Default Re: The Promise Enforcers Theme Song - 02-12-2007, 04:49 AM

Teehee, Zeke and Pastor Al have one-syllable names that more easily flowed in with the rest of the song.



Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!

Last edited by Rachael Van Helsing; 02-12-2007 at 04:49 AM.
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Default Re: The Promise Enforcers Theme Song - 02-13-2007, 01:37 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
Teehee, Zeke and Pastor Al have one-syllable names that more easily flowed in with the rest of the song.

My wasn't THAT lucky! *snicker*


In order to be old & wise,you must first be young & stupid.
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