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Default Re: What do you guys find wrong with people having different reli - 10-11-2007, 11:33 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Celtic View Post
Very tolerant.No, I'm afraid I'm very pale and white, I was just wondering. So, after I read this..kg..Uhh..Bible, what do I do to be True Christian?
KING JAMES VERSION OF 1611. (ie KJV1611)
Easy enough to spell, friend.

Read it, you'll find out what it takes!
But in short..

First,
You must acknowledge that you are a filthy sinner who doesn't deserve God's love nor forgiveness and REPENT of all your sins.
Then you must accept Jesus Christ as your personal Saviour, Redeemer of your sins with His temporary sacrifice and death on the cross -
Love and trust in Him with all your heart, never doubting, and obeying all of His commandments as found in the Word of God, the KJV1611.
Sincerly ask Jesus to enter into your heart and take over your sin-riddled life! Ask Jesus to SAVE you from yourself!

If thou be wise, thou shalt be wise for thyself: But if thou scornest, thou alone shalt bear it.
A foolish woman is clamorous: She is simple, and knoweth nothing.
Proverbs 9:12-13
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Default Re: What do you guys find wrong with people having different reli - 10-11-2007, 11:34 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Celtic View Post

Hmm. Interesting. Now, what would happen to negros who convert to christianity. Speak wisely - I'm considering going christian.
What wonderful news, Falsic ... um ... Celtic! Why just the other night you casually suggested you were bored and would probably be leaving!

Psst! They become True Christians™, of course, the same way any heathens who get Saved™ become True Christians™ ; for we are new creatures in GOD!

2 Corinthians 5:17 Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.

Romans 8:33 Who shall lay any thing to the charge of God's elect? It is God that justifieth.

Praise!

1st Timothy 2: 9 In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;
1st Timothy 2: 10 But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works ...

1 Timothy 5: 16 If any man or woman that believeth have widows, let them relieve them, and let not the church be charged; that it may relieve them that are widows indeed ...

Proverbs 31: 26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness ...
Proverbs 31: 27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness ...
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Default Re: What do you guys find wrong with people having different reli - 10-11-2007, 11:36 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by SalvationSeeker View Post
KING JAMES VERSION OF 1611. (ie KJV1611)
Easy enough to spell, friend.

Read it, you'll find out what it takes!
But in short..

First,
You must acknowledge that you are a filthy sinner who doesn't deserve God's love nor forgiveness and REPENT of all your sins.
Then you must accept Jesus Christ as your personal Saviour, Redeemer of your sins with His temporary sacrifice and death on the cross -
Love and trust in Him with all your heart, never doubting, and obeying all of His commandments as found in the Word of God, the KJV1611.
Sincerly ask Jesus to enter into your heart and take over your sin-riddled life! Ask Jesus to SAVE you from yourself!

Ok, hold on a moment..

Jesu, god, whichever one of you bothers to listen, I'm sorry for being a total atheist sinner who doesn't deserve squat. I accept Jesus as my personal savior, from all things homer-like, stupid and un-landover christian. Save meee! I really, really don't want to end up burning painfully.


Uhh..Done?
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Default Re: What do you guys find wrong with people having different reli - 10-11-2007, 11:38 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Celtic View Post
Ok, hold on a moment..

Jesu, god, whichever one of you bothers to listen, I'm sorry for being a total atheist sinner who doesn't deserve squat. I accept Jesus as my personal savior, from all things homer-like, stupid and un-landover christian. Save meee! I really, really don't want to end up burning painfully.

Uhh..Done?
Since you're not serious and don't actually believe squat you write right now -
No.

You can't lie to God.

If thou be wise, thou shalt be wise for thyself: But if thou scornest, thou alone shalt bear it.
A foolish woman is clamorous: She is simple, and knoweth nothing.
Proverbs 9:12-13
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Red face Re: What do you guys find wrong with people having different reli - 10-11-2007, 11:39 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sister Noddy View Post
What wonderful news, Falsic ... um ... Celtic! Why just the other night you casually suggested you were bored and would probably be leaving!

Psst! They become True Christians™, of course, the same way any heathens who get Saved™ become True Christians™ ; for we are new creatures in GOD!

2 Corinthians 5:17 Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.

Romans 8:33 Who shall lay any thing to the charge of God's elect? It is God that justifieth.

Praise!

What? Am I the only one who gets bored when tired? Sorry anyways. The falsie comment wasn't very nice.
-frown-
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Default Re: What do you guys find wrong with people having different reli - 10-11-2007, 11:41 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Celtic View Post
Ok, hold on a moment..

Jesu, god, whichever one of you bothers to listen, I'm sorry for being a total atheist sinner who doesn't deserve squat. I accept Jesus as my personal savior, from all things homer-like, stupid and un-landover christian. Save meee! I really, really don't want to end up burning painfully.


Uhh..Done?
No. Now you start a tithing schedule. Minimum 30% of your GROSS income. If you are a student, we will issue you a student waiver until you finish school and get a job. Then your tithes will become retroactive and you can pay them backward to today at 80%, but first you have to pass a rather lengthy security investigation by the Department of Faith to make sure there are no sinners in your family, yea, even unto the tenth generation. So get a genealogy together.

Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
"God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6
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Default Re: What do you guys find wrong with people having different reli - 10-11-2007, 11:43 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by SalvationSeeker View Post
Since you're not serious and don't actually believe squat you write right now -
No.

You can't lie to God.

xD I knew it was rather obvious. Anyways, I suppose I'll lurk and post randomly. Going onto deiantart,buh-bye for now.
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Default Re: What do you guys find wrong with people having different reli - 10-11-2007, 11:46 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Celtic View Post
xD I knew it was rather obvious. Anyways, I suppose I'll lurk and post randomly. Going onto deiantart,buh-bye for now.
Seriously idiot, give Jesus an honest try. You won't regret it.
You can start by hitting the PayPal button and show Jesus you love Him.

If thou be wise, thou shalt be wise for thyself: But if thou scornest, thou alone shalt bear it.
A foolish woman is clamorous: She is simple, and knoweth nothing.
Proverbs 9:12-13
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Default Re: What do you guys find wrong with people having different reli - 10-11-2007, 11:47 PM
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Originally Posted by SalvationSeeker View Post
Seriously idiot, give Jesus an honest try. You won't regret it.
You can start by hitting the PayPal button and show Jesus you love Him.

No thanks, I'd rather spen dmoney on rent and essential items. I'm suprised people actually tithe.
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Default Re: What do you guys find wrong with people having different reli - 10-11-2007, 11:51 PM
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Originally Posted by Celtic View Post
No thanks, I'd rather spen dmoney on rent and essential items. I'm suprised people actually tithe.
Essential items??
What could be more essential than SALVATION?

And you won't need to pay rent for a permanent dwelling in HELL..
Which is going to be your future home with the attitude you're displaying.

If thou be wise, thou shalt be wise for thyself: But if thou scornest, thou alone shalt bear it.
A foolish woman is clamorous: She is simple, and knoweth nothing.
Proverbs 9:12-13
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Default Re: What do you guys find wrong with people having different reli - 10-11-2007, 11:52 PM
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Originally Posted by SalvationSeeker View Post
Essential items??
What could be more essential than SALVATION?

And you won't need to pay rent for a permanent dwelling in HELL..
Which is going to be your future home with the attitude you're displaying.
Hun, I can't afford much really.
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Default Re: What do you guys find wrong with people having different reli - 10-11-2007, 11:55 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Celtic View Post
Hun, I can't afford much really.
In that case, Jesus commands that you tithe 100%.

Quote:
Mark 12:41 And Jesus sat over against the treasury, and beheld how the people cast money into the treasury: and many that were rich cast in much. Mark 12:42 And there came a certain poor widow, and she threw in two mites, which make a farthing. Mark 12:43 And he called unto him his disciples, and saith unto them, Verily I say unto you, That this poor widow hath cast more in, than all they which have cast into the treasury: Mark 12:44 For all they did cast in of their abundance; but she of her want did cast in all that she had, even all her living.
Don't worry, He'll reward you 100 fold. Do it now, before He kills you.

Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: What do you guys find wrong with people having different reli - 10-11-2007, 11:56 PM
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Originally Posted by Celtic View Post
Hun, I can't afford much really. Just my daily dose of heroin.
Are you so bitter? I don't do drugs, and I'm almost certain you'll change this post.
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Default Re: What do you guys find wrong with people having different reli - 10-11-2007, 11:59 PM
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Originally Posted by Celtic View Post
Are you so bitter? I don't do drugs, and I'm almost certain you'll change this post.
Friend, is there any reason that you reply to your own (strangely changed) quotes?

If thou be wise, thou shalt be wise for thyself: But if thou scornest, thou alone shalt bear it.
A foolish woman is clamorous: She is simple, and knoweth nothing.
Proverbs 9:12-13
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Default Re: What do you guys find wrong with people having different reli - 10-12-2007, 01:13 AM
i have become sick over this thread raul is becoming more and more agitated as i read from this site i have to read it because he is not bilingual though he is trying as hard as he can

every religion has value and positive points that make them special to their followers people should not have to pay to follow their god

raul says this site is racist

this site should be removed because it offends those who choose to have alternative lifestyles and beliefs and that is wrong and discriminatory and i know discrimination when i see it
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Default Re: What do you guys find wrong with people having different reli - 10-12-2007, 01:21 AM
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Originally Posted by John Smith View Post
i have become sick over this thread raul is becoming more and more agitated as i read from this site i have to read it because he is not bilingual though he is trying as hard as he can

every religion has value and positive points that make them special to their followers people should not have to pay to follow their god

raul says this site is racist
LET GO OF RAUL'S BUTTOCKS, YOU HOMER! WHAT CATHOLIC LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPICKING TO HIM IN?

Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
"God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6
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Default Re: What do you guys find wrong with people having different reli - 10-12-2007, 02:22 AM
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Originally Posted by John Smith View Post
i have become sick over this thread raul is becoming more and more agitated as i read from this site i have to read it because he is not bilingual though he is trying as hard as he can

every religion has value and positive points that make them special to their followers people should not have to pay to follow their god

raul says this site is racist


I say this site is funny.
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Default Re: What do you guys find wrong with people having different reli - 10-12-2007, 02:35 AM
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I say this site is funny.
I don't suppose you will think it's all that funny when SATAN is using your backside as the on-ramp to the Demon Derby!

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Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6
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Default Re: What do you guys find wrong with people having different reli - 10-12-2007, 03:59 AM
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I don't suppose you will think it's all that funny when SATAN is using your backside as the on-ramp to the Demon Derby!

I'll request being used as ground to be trampled on in polo.
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Buford T Scoggins has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureBuford T Scoggins has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureBuford T Scoggins has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureBuford T Scoggins has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureBuford T Scoggins has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureBuford T Scoggins has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureBuford T Scoggins has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureBuford T Scoggins has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureBuford T Scoggins has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureBuford T Scoggins has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureBuford T Scoggins has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapture
Default Re: What do you guys find wrong with people having different reli - 10-12-2007, 04:58 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Celtic View Post
No thanks, I'd rather spend money on rent and essential items. I'm surprised people actually tithe.

Tithing is an essential item too. Furthermore, it can be a good investment. It's done wonders for Haliburton.

Don't mess with Jesus,
Buford

yours in Christ,
Brother Buford



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