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Satan's Entertainment Discussion for Movies/TV/Music/Video Games/Pop Culture. How HELLY-wood is destroying our society and parents can learn to protect their children from sinful influences like Disney, Pacman, and Tic-Tac-Toe.

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Default TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills! - 09-08-2016, 06:52 PM

Brothers,

let's use this thread to bring new lyrics to old songs!
This can be a lot of fun!

All you have to do is take the old lyrics of songs and transform them into something more Biblical.

Here is my first attempt!
For the best experience play the song in the backround and read the new lyrics.



New Lirics by T.T:

Baking Pie

The pie smells well in the oven tonight
Not a husband to be seen
My kitchen - a kingdom of isolation
And it looks like I'm the queen

The oven is howling like this swirling storm inside
Couldn't keep it in, heaven knows I've tried
Let them in, Let them see
I'm a good wife always have to be
Conceal, feel, let them know
Well, now they know

Baking pie, baking pie
Can't hold it back anymore
baking pie, baking pie
Call my husband and open the door
I care what they're going to say
Let the faith be strong
Science never bothered me anyway

It's funny how some faith makes everything seem small
And the fears that once controlled me can't get to me at all
It's time to see what I can bake
To test the limits and break through
No right, no wrong, no rules for me
I'm free

Baking Pie, Baking pie
I am one with God
Baking Pie, Baking Pie
You'll might see me cry
Here I stand and here I stay
Let God be with me

God's power flurries through the air into the kitchen ground
My soul is spiraling in frozen fractals all around
And one thought crystallizes like an icy blast
I'm always going back, the kitchen is in my house

Baking Pie, Baking Pie
And I'll rise like the break of dawn.
Baking Pie, Baking Pie. The perfect wife is here
Here I stand in the light of day
Let the faith be strong
The outside world never bothered me anyway


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Default Re: TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills! - 09-23-2016, 03:16 PM

A favorite for Jesus's Birthday Bash! I changed up some words with George's help.
White Christmas:
-------------------------
I'm dreaming of a white Christmas
With no black people to be seen
Where they all run a way
Somewhere else to play
Because they were cursed in Genesis 9 18:27

I'm dreaming of a white Christmas
All the blacks, yellows, reds, browns have gone away
With every prayer I say
May none of the Christmases be gay
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Default Re: TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills! - 09-23-2016, 07:41 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Anne Sayne View Post
A favorite for Jesus's Birthday Bash! I changed up some words with George's help.
White Christmas:
-------------------------
I'm dreaming of a white Christmas
With no black people to be seen
Where they all run a way
Somewhere else to play
Because they were cursed in Genesis 9 18:27

I'm dreaming of a white Christmas
All the blacks, yellows, reds, browns have gone away
With every prayer I say
May none of the Christmases be gay
Not bad. I can see some more work going into this. But good for a start!
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Default Re: TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills! - 09-25-2016, 10:52 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Anne Sayne View Post
A favorite for Jesus's Birthday Bash! I changed up some words with George's help.
White Christmas:
-------------------------
I'm dreaming of a white Christmas
With no black people to be seen
Where they all run a way
Somewhere else to play
Because they were cursed in Genesis 9 18:27

I'm dreaming of a white Christmas
All the blacks, yellows, reds, browns have gone away
With every prayer I say
May none of the Christmases be gay
That's just racist and homopobic.
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Default Re: TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills! - 09-25-2016, 10:57 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by SomeRadnomGuy View Post
That's just racist and homopobic.
So's the Bible. What's your point?



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2017: "No, I sucked".
2018: "Hold my beer."
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Default Re: TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills! - 09-26-2016, 02:35 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by SomeRadnomGuy View Post
That's just racist and homopobic.
That's not racist. Racist would be calling a white person a snowman.


God is about as real as unicorns and dragons.
Revelation 12:9
Job 39:9
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Cool Re: TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills! - 09-26-2016, 05:42 AM

Just a reminder of copyright laws as you play your little game. If you need a lawyer to get you some rights, I'll sing along!


M. Hezekiah, Esq
Atty at Law


A half truth is a whole lie.
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Default Re: TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills! - 09-26-2016, 06:56 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Michael Hezekiah Esq View Post
Just a reminder of copyright laws as you play your little game. If you need a lawyer to get you some rights, I'll sing along!


M. Hezekiah, Esq
Atty at Law
Mazel tov Hezekiah, here's what the Bible (KJV1611) says about copyright law:

Quote:
For the scripture saith, thou shalt not muzzle the ox that treadeth out the corn. And, The labourer is worthy of his reward.

- 1 Timothy 5:18
Irving Berlin was paid handsomely for his "White Christmas" - especially for a jew (and by all accounts now dead). I recon that Jesus would have something to say about continuing to pay his worthless relatives and descendants for doing nothing.


Hell's foundations quiver at the shout of praise;
brothers, lift your voices, loud your anthems raise.
...and get off my lawn
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Cool Re: TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills! - 09-27-2016, 03:55 AM

To the tune of Havah Nagilah:


Hilla-ry Clinton
Hilla-ry Clinton
Hilla-ry Clinton
In twenty sixteen!


Hilla-ry Clinton
Hilla-ry Clinton
Hilla-ry Clinton
In twenty sixteen!


Donald? Vote for Donald?
Donald, na na na na na
Donald na na na na na
Donald na na na na na
Donald na na na na na
No no no! No no no! Not gonna vote for him!


May my mother and father forgive me for turning one of their favorite songs into a campaign jingle. Ana slach li.


A half truth is a whole lie.
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Default Re: TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills! - 09-27-2016, 04:52 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Michael Hezekiah Esq View Post
To the tune of Havah Nagilah:


Hilla-ry Clinton
Hilla-ry Clinton
Hilla-ry Clinton
In twenty sixteen!


Hilla-ry Clinton
Hilla-ry Clinton
Hilla-ry Clinton
In twenty sixteen!


Donald? Vote for Donald?
Donald, na na na na na
Donald na na na na na
Donald na na na na na
Donald na na na na na
No no no! No no no! Not gonna vote for him!


May my mother and father forgive me for turning one of their favorite songs into a campaign jingle. Ana slach li.
Get this evil Hellarry Clinton propaganda OFF God's favorite forum! And who even is "Havah Nagilah"? I want to ask him a few questions.


God is about as real as unicorns and dragons.
Revelation 12:9
Job 39:9
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Default Re: TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills! - 09-27-2016, 07:20 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Anne Sayne View Post
Get this evil Hellarry Clinton propaganda OFF God's favorite forum! And who even is "Havah Nagilah"? I want to ask him a few questions.
"Havah Nagilah" is supposedly one of those "modern" joo folk songs, and like all of them it is in a minor key and depressing. All that joo Klezmer music is depressing - and I surmise it's because they are still waiting around for a "Messiah". If they ever found Jesus they might just get around to composing music in major keys and be more pleasant to be around.


Hell's foundations quiver at the shout of praise;
brothers, lift your voices, loud your anthems raise.
...and get off my lawn
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Default Re: TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills! - 09-27-2016, 06:37 PM

Set to the Beatles' Hey Jude.
Hey, Jews, you worship wrong.


Take your false faith, and turn to Jesus.


It's better to admit to that you were wrong,


Then to deny the true Messiah and burn in Hell forever, ever, ever, ever, ever


Only Partially Tone-deafily Yours,


Handmaiden


His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.

Guns For God and the Economy
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Default Re: TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills! - 09-27-2016, 09:15 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by handmaiden View Post
Set to the Beatles' Hey Jude.
Hey, Jews, you worship wrong.


Take your false faith, and turn to Jesus.


It's better to admit to that you were wrong,


Then to deny the true Messiah and burn in Hell forever, ever, ever, ever, ever


Only Partially Tone-deafily Yours,


Handmaiden
You just did a picasso there, Handmaiden.
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Default Re: TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills! - 09-27-2016, 09:19 PM

That is just lovely, Sister Handmaiden. Do you think we could get Brother Roper Crossburn to record it?


Ecclesiastes 12:13

Let vs heare the conclusion of the whole matter: Feare God, and keepe his commandements, for this is the whole duetie of man.
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Default Re: TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills! - 09-27-2016, 09:24 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Joanna Lytton-Vasey View Post
That is just lovely, Sister Handmaiden. Do you think we could get Brother Roper Crossburn to record it?



Dear Sister Joanna, thank you for your kind words. I must make a confession, I did not know if Brother Templeton's comment was made to approve or censure.


I thought that doing a "Picasso" might have meant that I had dropped something and it shattered into a grouping of disturbed pieces.


Non-artistically Inclinedly Yours,


Handmaiden


His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.

Guns For God and the Economy
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Default Re: TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills! - 09-27-2016, 09:45 PM

Sister Handmaiden, what a wonderful song! Especially impressed because it comes from the same tune of the band that created the most evil genre of music, rock!


God is about as real as unicorns and dragons.
Revelation 12:9
Job 39:9
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Jesus Re: TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills! - 09-27-2016, 10:11 PM

I Saw God Standing There (Tune of the Beatles "I Saw Her Standing There")



Well my soul was unclean
I was just like Charlie Sheen
And the way I sinned
Was way beyond compare
But I'll never sin, oh my brother
Since I saw God standing there.

Well He looked my way
And I had to pray
I confessed my sins
He took them all away
Now I'll never sin, oh my brother
oooooh
Since I saw God standing there.

Well my soul was cleaned
Yeah I felt redeemed
When I felt His hand in mine

So He cleansed me from lust
And I knew I could trust
He would keep my soul and treat me really fair
Now I'll never sin, oh my brother oooooh
Since I saw God standing there
Well since I saw God standing there
Yeah well since I saw God standing there.


Proverbs 21:31 KJV 1611:
“The horse is prepared against the day of battell: but safetie is of the Lord.”

I can't wait until Jesus comes!
This is an event that will happen soon!
Revelation 22:12 is the proof!
I will be His horseman for all eternity.
PRAISE GOD!
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Default Re: TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills! - 09-28-2016, 12:50 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by BrotherLarry View Post
I Saw God Standing There (Tune of the Beatles "I Saw Her Standing There")



Well my soul was unclean
I was just like Charlie Sheen
And the way I sinned
Was way beyond compare
But I'll never sin, oh my brother
Since I saw God standing there.

Well He looked my way
And I had to pray
I confessed my sins
He took them all away
Now I'll never sin, oh my brother
oooooh
Since I saw God standing there.

Well my soul was cleaned
Yeah I felt redeemed
When I felt His hand in mine

So He cleansed me from lust
And I knew I could trust
He would keep my soul and treat me really fair
Now I'll never sin, oh my brother oooooh
Since I saw God standing there
Well since I saw God standing there
Yeah well since I saw God standing there.
Another great replacement of a godless Beatles song! We should go to the store, take all their albums off the shelves, and replace them with a collection of THESE masterpieces! Very impressed, BrotherLarry


God is about as real as unicorns and dragons.
Revelation 12:9
Job 39:9
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Default Re: TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills! - 09-28-2016, 12:50 PM

My version of "Hound Dog" by Elvis Pressly

Sodomite

You ain't nothin' but a sodomite
Faggin' all the time
Well, you ain't goin' to heaven
And you ain't no friend of mine

Well you said you were normal
Well that was just a lie
Yeah you said you were a Christian
Well that was just a lie
Well you ain't gonna live much longer
and you will soon die in AIDS

You ain't nothing but a pedophile
Molestin' all the time
Well you never loved Jesus
and you ain't no friend of Him
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Rebuke Re: TC-Old songs, New Lyrics! Show your writing Skills! - 09-28-2016, 02:21 PM

Whip Her (Tune of "Whip It" - Devo)


Crack that whip
Don't let that woman slip
Catch her doing crack?
Break your woman's back

When a magpie comes along
You must whip her
Before bad habits last too long
You must whip her
When your supper tastes all wrong
You must whip her

Now whip her
Into shape
Shape it up
Set her straight
Go forward
Move ahead
You must correct it
It's not too late
To whip her
Whip her good

When your wife is talking back
You must whip her
You will never live it down
Unless you whip her
What will your buddies say
If you don't whip her?

I say whip her
Whip her good
I say whip her
Whip her good


Crack that whip
Give her face a slap
When she tells you "no"
Break her little toe

When problem women come along
You must whip them
Just like children going wrong
You must whip them
Be inspired by my song
You must whip them

Now whip her
Into shape
Shape her up
Don't wait!
Go forward
Move ahead
Let God detect it
It's not too late
To whip her
Into shape
Shape her up
Get straight
Go forward
Move ahead
Is she aids infected?
Then it's too late
To whip her
Whip her good.


Proverbs 21:31 KJV 1611:
“The horse is prepared against the day of battell: but safetie is of the Lord.”

I can't wait until Jesus comes!
This is an event that will happen soon!
Revelation 22:12 is the proof!
I will be His horseman for all eternity.
PRAISE GOD!
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