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Straight 4 Jesus! (Back Door Christians) At LBC, we will cure your perversion of choice (even if we have to stone you).

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Default Gay Sex is when 8 Friends Take a Dump in Your Bed - 05-08-2014, 05:02 AM

THIS godly Pastor and lawmaker has hit the nail right on the head. I'm going to use his wise words in my Sermon this coming Sunday. I know it's Mother's Day, but I'll work it in.

Quote:
SD lawmaker: Gay sex is when 8 friends ‘take a dump in your bed,’ and Jesus hates it


South Dakota pastor and Republican state Rep. Steve Hickey this week defended a letter he wrote to a local paper comparing gay sex to “a one way alley for the garbage truck.”

Last week, Hickey came under fire after he posted the full text of his letter to Facebook.

The lawmaker argued that doctors should declare homosexuality dangerous because “we are talking about a one-way alley meant only for the garbage truck to go down.”

In a response written to the Argus-Leader on Monday, Democratic candidate Dr. Kevin J. Weiland explained that Hickey was “not only hurtful but entirely wrong.”

Hickey got a chance to respond during a 40-minute video interview with Argus-Leader Managing Editor Patrick Lalley later on Monday.

“There are no warnings — public health warnings — against homosexual sex,” Lalley told Hickey. “The general consensus of science is that the actual physical act is not any more dangerous [than heterosexual sex].”

“I don’t believe that consensus exists,” Hickey insisted. “I think there’s a complete intimidation factor going on.”

“And here’s what I’d like to ask Dr. Weiland. Do you tell your patients to wash their hands before they eat?” he continued. “Why? Because you touch a doorknob and you don’t want to get it inside your body.”

“I hesitate to get crude again, but Dr. Weiland, is it OK for, you know, eight of your friends that you’re in love with to take a dump in your bed and then you can sleep in it all year long?”

At that point, Lalley warned his guest about being crude.

“I haven’t hated on anyone,” he later remarked. “I haven’t brought up the Bible once in this conversation. This policy can be made without any of that.”

But just minutes later, Hickey turned to his Christian background when Lalley pointed out that he was creating a “sense of intolerance” with his descriptions of gay sex.

“People are deluding themselves if they think, you know, God loves you and everything you’re doing,” he opined. “You know, Jesus… he was forgiving and compassionate, and he told people, you don’t be casting stones. And then he told the gal, don’t do it any more.”

“And what the heck was he talking about when he said in the latter age about a wicked and perverse generation? What is that? So, if we’re going to talk about Jesus, let’s not be selective. And it’s a tough issue for pastors of all sides. This is an impossible thing for me to talk about.”


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: Gay Sex is when 8 Friends Take a Dump in Your Bed - 05-08-2014, 07:45 AM

I don't think you can fault the Intelligent Designer here for failing to put warning labels on every orifice in the human body. It would be difficult to anticipate what perversions Satan is going to come up with, just suffice it to say that the rectum is a one-way valve that everyone has been exposed to since birth and should know it by now, along with paying attention to the simple commandments in the Bible (KJV1611).


Hell's foundations quiver at the shout of praise;
brothers, lift your voices, loud your anthems raise.
...and get off my lawn
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