[soupblah]

i recently broke my finger so im gonna make this short because it is a slow process to type right now

what are you views on the tooth fairy story that parents tell their children

and if you have children of your own do you tell them of the tooth fairy?

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Originally Posted by soupblah

i recently broke my finger so im gonna make this short because it is a slow process to type right now

what are you views on the tooth fairy story that parents tell their children

and if you have children of your own do you tell them of the tooth fairy?

Please do not insult the intelligence of True Christians™ who habituate this Godly forum. Unless you can show us a Biblical citation that mentions fairies of some kind, then what you are talking about in pure myth. Only the Bible is true, not homeristic fables.

How did Jesus break your finger?

[soupblah]

Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel

Please do not insult the intelligence of True Christians™ who habituate this Godly forum. Unless you can show us a Biblical citation that mentions fairies of some kind, then what you are talking about in pure myth. Only the Bible is true, not homeristic fables.

How did Jesus break your finger?

it was not my intention to insult anyone in this forum and if you took it that way I apologize

i was not stating that faries exist I was merely asking what peoples opinions on the tooth fairy story that many children are told by their parents

and I broke my finger snowboarding

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

We wouldn't THINK of lyng to our children by telling them of some fairy prancing around and reaching under their pillows. It's disgusting! Whenever my daughter got a loose tooth I made her stand up straight and punch herself in the mouth until the tooth fell out. I told her that's what her future husband would do if she ever backsassed him. It gave her character and taught her respect for men, just as the Bible describes.

[not_satan]

so you would encourage the husband of your daughter to beat the shit out of her if she were to say...speak her mind....or prove him wrong or some unthinkable unforgivable act like that!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

[Talitha]

Originally Posted by not_satan

so you would encourage the husband of your daughter to beat the shit out of her if she were to say...speak her mind....or prove him wrong or some unthinkable unforgivable act like that!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

Listen to what the good Pastor is telling you.
No encouragement would be needed you silly thing! Any True Christian™ Woman expects her husband to chastise her, and any Good True Christian™ Man would be doing his duty in this way.

Genesis 3:16
Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.

[not_satan]

And how long ago was Genesis 3:16 written?

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Originally Posted by not_satan

And how long ago was Genesis 3:16 written?

The CORRECT version was written in 1611.

[Jesus is Lord]

Originally Posted by not_satan

And how long ago was Genesis 3:16 written?

395 years ago, when God dictated the Holy KJV1611 Bible to King James' scripes.

[not_satan]

and how can you prove to me

right now....through this forum...

that it is truly the correct version........

and also wouldn't the original be the correct version??

[SalvationSeeker]

Originally Posted by not_satan

and how can you prove to me

right now....through this forum...

that it is truly the correct version........

and also wouldn't the original be the correct version??

Can you prove it is not?
You come here to Jesus own forum and make accusations that God Himself is a liar, and isn't telling the truth about His holy word!
You prove YOUR wicked allegations instead.

[SUV]

(With a Name like that - he must be Godly! )

Still and all, Sirs, what is this now about the "tooth fairy"? Have Homer!sexies gotten heavily into things of a 'dental' nature?

If so, this is not a fit subject for our Children to be hearing about! Really!

Originally Posted by soupblah

if you have children of your own do you tell them of the tooth fairy?

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Originally Posted by not_satan

and how can you prove to me

right now....through this forum...

that it is truly the correct version........

and also wouldn't the original be the correct version??

Simplest thing in the world. I can just tell you so. But just in case you are a doubter, I can also provide a statement of belief.

Scripture

We believe the Bible (the 66 books of the Old and New Testaments) is the Word of God, written. As a "God-breathed" revelation, it is thus verbally inspired and completely without error (historically, scientifically, morally, and spiritually) in its original writings. While God the Holy Spirit supernaturally superintended the writing of the Bible, that writing nevertheless reflects the words and literary styles of its individual human authors. Scripture reveals the being, nature, and character of God, the nature of God's creation, and especially His will for the salvation of human beings through Jesus Christ. The Bible is therefore our supreme and final authority in all matters that it addresses.
Creation

We believe that the physical universe, the realm of nature, is the visible creation of God. It declares God's existence and gives a trustworthy revelation of God's character and purpose. In Scripture, God declares that through His creation all humanity recognizes His existence, power, glory, and wisdom. An honest study of nature -- its physical, biological, and social aspects -- can prove useful in a person's search for truth. Properly understood, God's Word (Scripture) and God's world (nature), as two revelations (one verbal, one physical) from the same God, will never contradict each other.
God

We believe in one infinitely perfect, eternal and personal God, the transcendent Creator and sovereign Sustainer of the universe. This one God is Triune, existing eternally and simultaneously as three distinct persons: Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. All three persons in the Godhead share equally and completely the one divine nature, and are therefore the same God, coequal in power, nature, and glory.
Person of Christ

We believe that Jesus Christ is both true God (the second Person of the Trinity) and true man (the Incarnate Son of God). We also believe in the great events surrounding Jesus Christ's life and ministry, including: His eternal preexistence, His virgin birth, His attesting miracles, His sinless life, His sacrificial death on the cross, His glorious bodily resurrection from the dead, His ascension into heaven, and His present work in heaven as High Priest and Advocate. He will return in glory to resurrect and judge all mankind.
Person of the Holy Spirit

We believe that the Holy Spirit, the third Person of the Trinity, is indeed a Divine Person, coequal with the Father and the Son. We also believe in the ministry of the Holy Spirit in salvation, a ministry which includes anointing and glorifying Christ, convicting men of their sin, bringing about the regeneration of lost sinners, and indwelling believers and empowering them for godly living and spiritual service.
Mankind

We believe God created mankind in His image and likeness (having rational, moral, relational, and spiritual capacities) to fellowship with Him and give Him glory. Human beings are therefore the crown of God's creation (possessing inherent dignity and moral worth), and thus distinct in kind from all other life on earth. Eve, the first woman, chose to rebel against God and drag her husband and Master, Adam, down with her. As a result, all females became separated from God, the image of God in man distorted, and the sinful nature passed on to all their progeny. Because of original sin (which includes both corruption and guilt), unregenerate human beings are incapable of pleasing or commending themselves to God. The only remedy for mankind's pitiful predicament is redemption through faith in Jesus Christ and a thorough beating for the wife on occasion.
Redemption

We believe God has acted sovereignly to bridge the gap that separates people from Himself. He sent His Son, born of a virgin, attested by miracles and by a sinless life, to bear the full penalty for humanity's sin. Jesus Christ suffered and died in the place of sinners, thus satisfying the Father's just wrath against human sin, and effecting true reconciliation between God and mankind for those who believe. In the atoning death of Christ, both God's love and God's justice are fully manifested. The righteousness of Jesus Christ in perfectly fulfilling the law of God has been graciously credited to all believers. Redemption is solely a work of God's grace, received exclusively through faith in Jesus Christ, and sometimes by works of human merit in His name.
Justification

We believe justification is a judicial act of God's grace wherein He acquits a person of all sin and accepts that person as righteous in His sight because of the imputed righteousness of Christ. Justification is strictly a work of God's grace, apprehended through faith and works, or one or the other, and solely on the account of Christ.
Resurrection

We believe Jesus Christ rose bodily from the dead, conquering sin, death, and all the powers of Satan. The resurrection is God's historical affirmation and vindication of Jesus Christ's unique identity, mission, and message. Historical evidence of the resurrection is manifest in Christ's empty tomb, His many resurrection appearances, and in the emergence of the Christian church. Jesus Christ now resides at the right hand of the Father, and lives to indwell all who recognize their sinfulness, who repent, and who turn their lives over to His authority on earth, the Landover Baptist Church.
The Church

We believe the church is the spiritual body of Jesus Christ (its Founder, Head, and Shepherd) and that it encompasses all true believers at all times and places. The function of the church is to carry out the Lord's expressed will through the power of the Holy Spirit. One of the central purposes of the church is to preach the Gospel (in both word and life), the good news that humankind can find salvation from sin through faith in Jesus Christ. All people who have placed their faith (confident trust) in Jesus Christ for salvation belong to the church and are, thus, the people of God. This community of believers is made up of people who are neither perfect nor sinless, but by grace their lives are coming more and more under the control of the Holy Spirit, expressing His love, joy, peace, and other Christ-like qualities, such as the hatred and killing of enemies.
Future Things

We believe the Lord Jesus Christ will return to this earth, personally, bodily, and visibly to begin the final battle, kill the unbelievers and establish his glorious reign in a kingdom that will never end. As the sovereign Lord, He will resurrect and judge all humanity. Those who have received His offer of life through the Gospel will go to eternal blessings in heaven; those who have rejected it, to eternal conscious torment in hell. We look forward to the blessed hope, Christ's Second Coming in glory.
The Great Commission

We believe Jesus Christ is the only way of salvation. And since Christ has commissioned His people, the church, to go into all the world to disciple, to baptize, and to teach everyone everywhere to obey His Word and kill those who don't, in His mercy We desire, by His grace, to play our part in reaching the world with the Gospel of Christ.

[Deaner]

Originally Posted by not_satan

so you would encourage the husband of your daughter to beat the shit out of her if she were to say...speak her mind....or prove him wrong or some unthinkable unforgivable act like that!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

Christ haters like you disgust me. Why do you take everything we say out of context?

I've re-read Pastor Pistle's post and I can't find where he said it's ok to beat the sh*t out of your wife. Could you point it out please? He said a punch in the mouth, not a beating. There's a big difference.

Dean

[not_satan]

Originally Posted by SalvationSeeker

Can you prove it is not?
You come here to Jesus own forum and make accusations that God Himself is a liar, and isn't telling the truth about His holy word!
You prove YOUR wicked allegations instead.

I never once said that god is a liar. I merely raised the question of how is the version of the bible that was released 300 some odd years truly the correct one.

Also what changes were made to it that made it the correct one

[not_satan]

I would say that I did exaggerate Pastor Pistles words but the difference between a beating and a punch to the mouth could simply be another punch right after the first.

[Brother Temperance]

Originally Posted by not_satan

I would say that I did exaggerate Pastor Pistles words but the difference between a beating and a punch to the mouth could simply be another punch right after the first.

You seem to know an awful lot about beating women. I do hope you're not some kind of misogynist.

[not_satan]

Well I'll be honest and say I've no clue in hell wat a misogynist is.........

but as far as i know.....no i'm not

[SalvationSeeker]

Originally Posted by not_satan

I never once said that god is a liar. I merely raised the question of how is the version of the bible that was released 300 some odd years truly the correct one.

Also what changes were made to it that made it the correct one

Rather, what changes was made to the other, incorrect, versions?
To make them less like the KJV1611, and thus less correct.

The KJV1611 however, was dictated by GOD HIMSELF in 1611!
The time of miracles has not yet passed.

[Deaner]

Originally Posted by not_satan

the difference between a beating and a punch to the mouth could simply be another punch right after the first.

So you're saying that two punches to the mouth constitutes a beating? Wrong again sinner; that constitutes "been told twice".

Now apologize to Pastor Pistle and ask Jesus to forgive you.

Dean