Dear Friends,
Our Church has long prided itself on being an open, straight-talking, honest community that does not resort to the sort of political correctness, code-talk, and beating around the bush common among conservatives. However, while we resist the Kenyan occupation, there is the risk that certain squeamish voters,
mostly the young, might be turned off by our honesty.
For that reason, the Republican party has asked that during the Obama administration, we use the standard Republican codewords, as outlined in the recent GOP strategy memo. Here are a few of the most important ones, please memorize and use them in future posts:
What we say now =
codeword to replace it with
Women
Rape =
philosophically complex issues *, other methods of conception *
Talking about issues important to women and brown people =
pandering.
*
women and brown people =
special interests
Typical female hysteria =
overreacting *
Moochers and leeches
Helping the poor =
buying votes
social security and medicare =
collectivism
Privatize social security and medicare =
personalize social security and medicare *
funding schools =
generational theft
Race
"
Would you let your daughter marry a negro?" =
cuckservative *
racist =
racially conscious, politically incorrect
Hate crimes against hispanics =
supporting voluntary self-deportation
Make more white babies before we're overrun by the brown swarm =
pro-life, 5 children, quiverfull
Talking to foreigners =
apologizing
White people =
Real Americans
the white race =
Western Civilization
n!gger-lover =
community activist
jews =
liberal elites, non-Christians
uppity negro =
Arrogant elitist
Mexicans and blacks = credit-unworthy people*
discrimination =
freedom of expressive association.
hispanics =
illegal aliens, illegals
other brown people =
terrorists
blacks =
criminals
Typical n!gger behavior =
TNB
blacks and wetbacks voting =
voter fraud
segregation, slavery, lynching etc. =
states rights
Sodomites
homosexuals =
perverts, pedophiles
god hates fags =
I support family values
Filthy Disease Ridden Queers =
FDRQ
Economy
Corporations =
People
Bribe, campaign contribution, financial irregularity =
free speech
campaign finace reform = anti-freedom of speech
Jew bankers =
George Soros
raising the minimum wage =
Class Warfare
lobbyist =
recognized expert
Government
Civil liberties (other than machine-gun ownership) =
helping terrorists
Dictatorial powers (not including machinegun control) =
security
Unconstitutional, tyrannical acts we like =
leadership *
The constitution, or any interfering with unrestrained police-state power =
second-guessing the police *.
The internet as we know it =
hard-core pornography, piracy
Secretive Government =
privacy rights
deny Constitutional rights (to) =
defend democracy (from)
nations with stuff we want =
American interests
Military and Security
Arms industry lobbyists =
the troops
Military servicemen and police (under Democratic presidencies) =
Jack-booted thugs, stormtroopers *
Guns
Gun industry lobbyist =
Gun rights advocate
Background checks, smaller magazines, "cooling-off period", other regulatory tweaks =
banning guns
General/Other
out-of-the-closet =
militant
continue the Bush administration =
bipartisanship
extremist =
maverick
Bush loyalists =
Tea Party
Lies (told by a republican) =
Saying what's in your heart *
There are many more, but I don't want to overwhelm everybody.
Here's an example of a translation:
The democratic party, run by community activist Obama and the liberal elite, wants to give freedom to criminals, pedophiles, illegals, and terrorists, by inciting class warfare and opposing states rights. As tea-party mavericks we will stop piracy and hard-core pornography to stop the militant perverts/atheists, and to stop wikileaks from Nixonian invasions of our privacy. The only people who disagree are non-Christians who apologize to terrorists!
Notice how that sounds so much more acceptable to a mushy moderate than the origional sentence:
The democratic party, run by n!gger-lover Obama and the jews, wants to give freedom to blacks, gays, mexicans, and brown people, by raising the minimum wage and opposing segregation. As republican extremists, we will censor the internet to stop the out-of-the-closet gays and out-of-the-closet atheists, and to stop wikileaks from interphereing with our secretive government. The only people who disagree are jews and their useful idiots who talk to foreign brown people!"
(It's important to all be on the same page regarding our codewords. For example, this week I must have heard a dozen people talking about how much they hate Canadians. And some of the comments were very confusing: "We should send all the Canadians back to africa" and "The only reason people like Barak Obama is because he looks so smart compared to other Canadians". Huh? Then I saw
this article, and it all made sense.)
UPDATE: Discussion of this list is
here.