[Jeb Stuart Thurmond]

Dear Friends,

I am shocked and saddened by the explosion of stinginess and greed that has occured recently. I have seen some of the most generous tithers turn into penny-pinching misers of almost Judiac proportions! Worst of all are the excuses: "But I'm in debt" "I need to pay for my medical treatments" "But I need that money to feed my kids" - do you think Jesus has less problems than you? You think you or your fat kids need the money more than Jesus does? I urge everyone to read, re-read and then re-read again our Tithing FAQ.

Now, with that over with, let's talk about how to keep paying Jesus, despite the outbreak of laziness, greed and miserliness among the tin-tithers.

My answer: more gold and platinum tithers. This article explains how to get them:

The days of big spending are over for many Americans, but not for the high rollers...On a recent weekday night in the Hollywood Hills, jeweler Damiani and lifestyle magazine Angeleno took over a $9-million house with views of Los Angeles to throw a lavish party for potential customers...About 40 men in dark suits and women wearing pearls dined on frisee and filet mignon, then sipped champagne as they gazed at jewelry displays...

Such parties are becoming more common, and more extravagant, as marketers try to connect with rich clients in tough economic times.

Over-the-top affairs are out of the question for most companies as they try to tone down their marketing campaigns to match their shrinking revenue and the gloomy mood of consumers. But in luxury marketing, splashy events are back in vogue.

"In turbulent times, when consumer confidence is decreasing and consumption habits are changing, the most important thing is to gain loyalty from the core customer," said Claudia D'Arpizio, a luxury analyst with consulting firm Bain & Co...the economic slowdown is forcing them to focus on their core customers: high-net-worth individuals capable of spending thousands of dollars in one visit. Price cuts risk backfiring by diminishing a brand's exclusive image, so brands are reaching out on a personal level.

"We're trying to be much more targeted and give customers a more intimate experience with our brand," said Laurie Patruno, boutique manager for the new Damiani store on Rodeo Drive....

Retailers must go to extreme lengths to attract the interest of top spenders, said Alan Klein, Angeleno's president and group publisher.

He pointed to a recent example in which a high-end marketer invited potential clients to fly MiG jets. In Toronto, American Express invited its best clients to a dinner party -- in a room suspended 160 feet in the air by a crane -- that featured food from some of Canada's top chefs, said David Ghysels, a partner at Events in the Sky, which put on the dinner.

"The market's saturated; there are many, many events going on," said Dawn Moore, general manager of pearl store Mikimoto in Beverly Hills. "It's a new game and it takes a lot of creativity."

Equinox, the chain of posh fitness clubs, has recently eschewed billboard and magazine ads. It instead threw a party for a new gym opening, said West Coast marketing manager Christopher Lam. Equinox invited potential customers "with a certain salary" who worked at nearby companies to a bash where they were greeted by models, danced to music spun by DJ Splyce, noshed on tuna tartare and beef carpaccio, and left with $150 gift bags that included spa items, guest passes, clothing and silver bags.

"We found that it was more of an engaging experience to have them come and enjoy themselves at a different setting," he said...

At a black-tie event for VIPs, jet maker Bombardier served wine and champagne at a bar flanked by a big-screen TV showing interiors of its planes.

At another event, Emirates Airlines paid singer Ricky Martin more than half a million dollars to perform at a party kicking off its entry into the Los Angeles market (Martin changed the words of a song to mention Dubai, where the airline is based). Guests chose from menu options such as "A California collection of luxury West Coast seafood with lobster, king prawn and a timbale of crab with avocado, tomato and Meyer lemon puree," and they left with a glossy coffee-table book about Emirates.

At the Damiani-Angeleno event, the companies' brands -- along with others including Fiji Water -- were printed on the menu and splashed on door-sized posters around the house. Damiani staff members at the dinner party wore sample diamond jewelry worth tens of thousands of dollars.

That the events are getting more lavish at a time of rising unemployment and economic uncertainties isn't lost on guests or planners...

Now, I would never suggest having an illegal alien like Rikki Marten sing at our events, but you get the idea. Just do what the article says: focus on the core consumer.

And as for the misers who turned away Jesus in his hour of financial need - we know who you are, and we have long memories.

[Pastor Billy-Reuben]

Originally Posted by Jeb Thurmond

Worst of all are the excuses: "But I'm in debt" "I need to pay for my medical treatments" "But I need that money to feed my kids"

Amen, Brother! Allow me to preach on this a little bit.

If you are making excuses instead of tithing, it proves you don't trust God and it's a pretty big clue that you aren't saved. You aren't putting God first. If you sow sparingly, you will reap sparingly. Tithing is the best investment you can make. When someone tells me they can't afford to tithe, I tell them that they can't afford NOT to tithe! If you tithe cheerfully and generously, God will make sure that you always have everything you need. 2Cor 9:6-8.

If you are saved, then what are you worried about? Jesus said this:

Matt 6:26 Behold the fowls of the air: for they sow not, neither do they reap, nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feedeth them. Are ye not much better than they?

Birds don't have 401(k)'s. They don't save for retirement or for their nestlings' college education. They don't own real estate or automobiles. They don't need to do any of that because God takes care of them. Jesus said that you don't need savings either. God will take care of you.

Matt 6:28 And why take ye thought for raiment? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow; they toil not, neither do they spin:
Matt 6:29 And yet I say unto you, That even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these.
Matt 6:30 Wherefore, if God so clothe the grass of the field, which to day is, and to morrow is cast into the oven, shall he not much more clothe you, O ye of little faith?
Matt 6:31 Therefore take no thought, saying, What shall we eat? or, What shall we drink? or, Wherewithal shall we be clothed?

Don't worry about having enough money to eat or buy clothes. God will provide it for you. If you worry about that sort of thing, it shows that you don't have much faith in the Lord.

Pastor Billy-Reuben

[Jeb Stuart Thurmond]

I have just found a perfect location for our fundraising event:

The $37,000,000 apartment that was just bought by former executive vice president at Merrill Lynch Morgage Investors inc, Peter Kraus. Peter, who works so hard he earned a $25,000,000 bonus for 3 months work, sounds like a real True Christian kind of guy. He sure knows how taxpayers want the wall-street bailout to be spent - creating jobs and helping real estate prices.

Some details on the apartment:



The baronial living room has 11' ceilings with exquisite crown molding, a wood burning fireplace and intricate parquetry floors. The formal dining room is grand for entertaining but cozy enough for family suppers with its wood burning fireplace. The beautiful in-laid floors are repeated here and the dental crown molding, plaster relief encircling the chandelier and rich Venetian plaster walls make for a stunning room. The library off the living room is paneled in rich mahogany and has a third wood burning fireplace...Much original brass hardware, bullet door hinges and key holes remain intact on the heavy, six-panel doors. There is a sound system, pin-spot lighting throughout the public rooms and through the wall air conditioning. Additionally, the building has a dedicated, full time staff, private storage, wine cellar, squash court and fitness room...

Tax deduction: 38%

[Pastor Isaac Peters]

Our Lord expects nothing less.

Matt. 26:7-13: There came unto him a woman having an alabaster box of very precious ointment, and poured it on his head, as he sat [at meat]. But when his disciples saw [it], they had indignation, saying, To what purpose [is] this waste? For this ointment might have been sold for much, and given to the poor. When Jesus understood [it], he said unto them, Why trouble ye the woman? for she hath wrought a good work upon me. For ye have the poor always with you; but me ye have not always. For in that she hath poured this ointment on my body, she did [it] for my burial. Verily I say unto you, Wheresoever this gospel shall be preached in the whole world, [there] shall also this, that this woman hath done, be told for a memorial of her.

[Jeb Stuart Thurmond]

For the last time, no more blaming the economy for a lack of money to donate! The economy is only bad for lazy people: Reuters:

The number of U.S. households with a net worth of at least $1 million jumped 16 percent last year...ultra high net worth families -- those with at least $5 million -- grew 17 percent last year to 980,000...

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Originally Posted by Jeb Thurmond

For the last time, no more blaming the economy for a lack of money to donate! The economy is only bad for lazy people: Reuters:

The number of U.S. households with a net worth of at least $1 million jumped 16 percent last year...ultra high net worth families -- those with at least $5 million -- grew 17 percent last year to 980,000...

And praise Jesus, a few dozen of them live in Freehold!

Get your Harvest people. Jesus is ready to drench you in Blessings!!

[Jeb Stuart Thurmond]

Bumping this thread because an undisclosed source I know - an expert of sorts in the field - reports to me that a certain local celebrity, I'll call him Mr. "Magnet" Broccollini", invented the line "Do you like that? Yeah?" which has since become a cornerstone of his particular genre of motion picture.

Though I'm not certain exactly how royalties work, I do believe this makes him several million dollars wealthier than he claims to be. Mr. Broccolli, that money belongs to God! Tithe NOW!

[Tchoupitoulas]

If Jesus is in heaven, where the streets are made of gold, and the buildings are mare of precious stones, why does he need my grocery money?

[James Dewitt]

Originally Posted by Jeb Thurmond

Bumping this thread because an undisclosed source I know - an expert of sorts in the field - reports to me that a certain local celebrity, I'll call him Mr. "Magnet" Broccollini", invented the line "Do you like that? Yeah?" which has since become a cornerstone of his particular genre of motion picture.

Though I'm not certain exactly how royalties work, I do believe this makes him several million dollars wealthier than he claims to be. Mr. Broccolli, that money belongs to God! Tithe NOW!

Sweet Jesus, Its not me, the check I cut last week was bigger than the operating budget of Freehold township for a year.

[Mrs. Mary Whitford]

Originally Posted by Tchoupitoulas

why does He need my grocery money?

Don't start jooing Jesus out of what's rightfully His! Pay up, missy, or you will be in for a world of eternal damnation!

[Bobby-Joe]

Originally Posted by Tchoupitoulas

If Jesus is in heaven, where the streets are made of gold, and the buildings are mare of precious stones, why does he need my grocery money?

Friend,

If you loan someone money, you would expect them to pay it back? Right? How much money Christ owns, or the fact The Lord can will precious metals out of thin air has nothing to do with it. It's His money and He wants it back.

[Tchoupitoulas]

Originally Posted by Sister Mary Maria

Don't start jooing Jesus out of what's rightfully His! Pay up, missy, or you will be in for a world of eternal damnation!

I worked for it; it belongs to me. Even if I wanted to donate some of it to Jesus, I don't have enough stamps to mail a check to heaven.
I think I'll just pick up a few extra groceries and donate them to the homeless shelter. If Jesus were still alive, it's what he would do.

[Tchoupitoulas]

Originally Posted by Bobby-Joe

Friend,

If you loan someone money, you would expect them to pay it back? Right? How much money Christ owns, or the fact The Lord can will precious metals out of thin air has nothing to do with it. It's His money and He wants it back.

Jesus didn't lend me money - I work for my paycheck.

[Meek and Humble]

Originally Posted by Tchoupitoulas

I worked for it; it belongs to me. Even if I wanted to donate some of it to Jesus, I don't have enough stamps to mail a check to heaven.
I think I'll just pick up a few extra groceries and donate them to the homeless shelter. If Jesus were still alive, it's what he would do.

No, it isn't. Jesus spoke out against giving money to the poor instead of giving it to him.

John 12:3Then Mary took about a pint of pure nard, an expensive perfume; she poured it on Jesus' feet and wiped his feet with her hair. And the house was filled with the fragrance of the perfume.
4But one of his disciples, Judas Iscariot, who was later to betray him, objected, 5"Why wasn't this perfume sold and the money given to the poor? It was worth a year's wages." 6He did not say this because he cared about the poor but because he was a thief; as keeper of the money bag, he used to help himself to what was put into it.
7"Leave her alone," Jesus replied. " It was intended that she should save this perfume for the day of my burial. 8You will always have the poor among you, but you will not always have me."


As this story teaches, if you say you want to give money to the poor instead of Jesus, it's because you are a greedy thief.

[Meek and Humble]

Originally Posted by Tchoupitoulas

Jesus didn't lend me money - I work for my paycheck.

James 1: 17Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness, neither shadow of turning.

[Tchoupitoulas]

Originally Posted by Heathen_Basher

No, it isn't. Jesus spoke out against giving money to the poor instead of giving it to him.

John 12:3Then Mary took about a pint of pure nard, an expensive perfume; she poured it on Jesus' feet and wiped his feet with her hair. And the house was filled with the fragrance of the perfume.
4But one of his disciples, Judas Iscariot, who was later to betray him, objected, 5"Why wasn't this perfume sold and the money given to the poor? It was worth a year's wages." 6He did not say this because he cared about the poor but because he was a thief; as keeper of the money bag, he used to help himself to what was put into it.
7"Leave her alone," Jesus replied. " It was intended that she should save this perfume for the day of my burial. 8You will always have the poor among you, but you will not always have me."


As this story teaches, if you say you want to give money to the poor instead of Jesus, it's because you are a greedy thief.

I said I was going to give FOOD to the HUNGRY- which your book says Jesus did with fish and bread.

[James Dewitt]

Originally Posted by Tchoupitoulas

I worked for it; it belongs to me. Even if I wanted to donate some of it to Jesus, I don't have enough stamps to mail a check to heaven.
I think I'll just pick up a few extra groceries and donate them to the homeless shelter. If Jesus were still alive, it's what he would do.

You don't send the check directly to Jesus, don't be stupid. Send a cashiers check to Landover Baptist Church , PO Box 156, Freehold IA. C/o the Pastors fund. They will make sure Jesus gets the receipt.

[Meek and Humble]

Originally Posted by Tchoupitoulas

I said I was going to give FOOD to the HUNGRY- which your book says Jesus did with fish and bread.

Those people weren't POOR. They were people who traveled to listen to Jesus teachings. Jesus was simply handing out blessings to his followers, as always

[James Dewitt]

Originally Posted by Heathen_Basher

Those people weren't POOR. They were people who traveled to listen to Jesus teachings. Jesus was simply handing out blessings to his followers, as always

Its no different than when you stop by, I am obliged to offer refreshments to my brethren. But that does not get me out of my obligation to Jesus, he still gets my 20% before taxes( net not take home) as it should be.

[Tchoupitoulas]

Originally Posted by James Dewitt

You don't send the check directly to Jesus, don't be stupid. Send a cashiers check to Landover Baptist Church , PO Box 156, Freehold IA. C/o the Pastors fund. They will make sure Jesus gets the receipt.

I don't donate money to any organization unless I approve of how it's going to be spent. What exactly is this Pastor's Fund used for?