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Default My Ministry to The Japs - 09-08-2012, 11:20 PM

As you all know, I spend quite a bit of time over in Godless Japan. I thought it might be useful (okay, and the Board of Elders insisted) that I start posting some of my findings from slantland, the better to keep you all safe (and my budget intact).

This is the kind of thing I have to put up with over there.


They call these "manjoo" which is japspeak for "man juice" I'm pretty sure. They're sold on every street corner.




Here's a sale at a department store. Can you imagine?



You can't avoid seeing the local monkeys sporting shirts with obscenities on them. Japan isn't safe for decent people.



Here's the local meat market. You don't wanna know.



Here's a local festival. They actually worship big American tallywhackers like this one.


That's all for now. Ask if you've got questions.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: My Ministry to The Japs - 04-25-2015, 06:47 PM

THIS is just a small sampling of some of the depraved heathenistic behavior that I have to deal with doing my Ministry to the godless slants. Even their communistic government is up in arms about this new fad of hiring whores to take off their clothes and bounce their titties around at funerals.

Quote:
Chinese Government Cracks Down On Funeral Strippers

The Chinese government doesn't want any more strippers performing graveside.

In a statement released Thursday, the Chinese Ministry of Culture said it will work with police to enforce a ban on hiring women to dance and strip during funeral processions, according to The Wall Street Journal's "China Real Time" blog.

The statement condemned several "obscene" incidents, including one earlier this year in Handan, in Heibei province, in which six women were hired to perform an erotic dance at a funeral attended by small children.

Obscenity laws in China already prohibit public nudity. But according to a National Geographic video, the decades-old tradition of hiring funeral dancers to draw onlookers persists, linked to a cultural belief that "respect for the dead is measured in crowd size." In parts of China, a large crowd at a funeral is seen as an omen of success in the afterlife.



In one video, one man described the instructions a relative left for his own funeral before he died.

"He told his friends he wanted a hole to be dug in his coffin, and have the girls dance in front of him," the man said. "That way, he could watch the dance through the hole."

Indeed, the video shows a hole at the foot of the casket.

The custom of hiring strippers for funerals became prevalent in Taiwan in the 1980s, but is also practiced in mainland China.

Marc L. Moskowitz, an anthropologist at the University of South Carolina, detailed the funeral rite in his documentary film "Dancing for the Dead: Funeral Strippers in Taiwan."



"It's not at all common for urbanites, but in rural settings, most people have seen these performances. Actual full stripping has gone underground because there were laws enacted against full nudity in the mid-80s, so that isn't as popular as it once was," Moskowitz said.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

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Default Re: My Ministry to The Japs - 04-25-2015, 07:06 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
THIS is just a small sampling of some of the depraved heathenistic behavior that I have to deal with doing my Ministry to the godless slants. Even their communistic government is up in arms about this new fad of hiring whores to take off their clothes and bounce their titties around at funerals.
I assure you those Chinks will strip for men that are still alive, too. So will the Nips - they will show their nips to anyone that has $20, or at least they would during my time in the service. Both the chinks and nips would beg us burly, American men to give them pleasure because they would say their own kind had tiny little ding dongs and they wanted something more substantial. Being a servant of my King of Kings, I avoided the temptations of the flesh, and would return to my bunk to pray and fast for souls. My buddies, however, would share lewd stories of the acts these vile women would perform. I suspect they did their share of dancing for the nips we left dead on the battlefields. GOD BLESS OUR COUNTRY. Hallelujah! I just hope our victories didn't lead them into sinful behavior that could lead back to us when God declares His righteous decisions on the Great and Fateful Day.
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Default Re: My Ministry to The Japs - 08-08-2015, 09:29 PM

The other day I was relaxing in my hotel room over in slantland, when I made the mistake of switching on the TV. It turns out that every single channel runs programs designed to insire perverted, ungodly behavior.

Here is a sampling of what I'm up against. This is what passes as a children's educational show.




These are from a TV program featuring pop songs for young adults. As you can see, decent Christian clothing is not popular in Japan.






And don't even get me started on their game shows. This one is called (pardon my French) "Kiss My Ass!"




On this game show, Chinese whores fondle a man's tallywhacker while he sings a song about worshiping false gods.




Honestly, there are so many ungodly game shows in Japan it boggles the mind.




And then there are the depraved TV commercials selling God knows what.





Despite being tiny little people, tv shows that feature eating contests are surprisingly popular. These little yellow monkeys can really pack it away. I haven't been able to figure out how they do it, but I'm sure that satan is involved.




For sports, they have retard wrestling on TV. I admit that I've taken a liking to THIS show.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

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Default Re: My Ministry to The Japs - 11-17-2015, 03:13 AM

I want to give you all an update on my recent ministry successes here in the land of slants.

I'm pleased to report that I have brought a jap to Jesus. THIS lady's ex husband was ripe for the picking. I prayed for him and laid hands on him and I expect everything to become....intact once gain soon, Praise Jesus.

Meanwhile in the world of sin and debauchery, this is the number one punk song for all of the ornamentals these days. I have to listen to it constantly.



Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: My Ministry to The Japs - 11-17-2015, 03:29 AM

There are Chinese people in my home country which is Jamaica but they don't do any of the things those Chinese people in the videos do. In Jamaica the Chinese always smoke cigarettes and they are very greedy for money. Those Chinese people have probably been corrupted here in Babylon. I have seen white people do some of those things and the Chinese people probably learned those things here.


Sing unto God, sing praises to his name: Extol him that rideth upon the heavens By his name JAH, and rejoice before him.-Psalms 68:4
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Default Re: My Ministry to The Japs - 09-09-2012, 10:25 PM

THIS group of jungle chinks are being persecuted for being Christians, and I'm the one that brought them to Christ!

Well, mostly. They don't really understand Christ's Blessings, and they are suspicious that they won't be let into Heaven on account of them being little yellow devils. Plus they want to bow down to statues of Jesus, because they're used to doing that to their ex-god, the obese chinaman "Boodha." And now the government wants to force them to spit in Christ's face and start worshiping the fat chink god again.

See what I have to go through? You can't win for losing. It took me 2 years to get those slants to convert! And now look at them: they won't even take a beating for Christ!

Quote:
Myanmar Christians forced to convert

Bangkok - Christian students from Myanmar's Chin ethnic minority have been forced to convert to Buddhism, shave their heads and wear monastic robes, a rights group said on Wednesday.

The Chin, a mainly Christian group in the poor and remote west of the predominantly Buddhist country, face harassment for the link between their faith and British colonial rule, according to the Chin Human Rights Organisation (CHRO).

"President Thein Sein's government claims that religious freedom is protected by law but in reality Buddhism is treated as the de facto state religion", said Salai Ling, Programme Director of the CHRO.

Rachel Fleming, another member of the group, said Christianity does not fit with an ultra-nationalistic view put forward by successive military regimes that "to be Burmese, you should be Buddhist".

Chin students are also frequently targeted for enrollment in schools run by Myanmar's military which convert them to Buddhism, she said, adding that Christian students are beaten for failing to recite Buddhist scriptures.

Poverty among the Chin, whose main source of income is farming, leaves the group vulnerable to recruitment to these schools as the military offers free food, education and government jobs once they graduate.

Chin state, which borders India, is home to around 500 000 people. Tens of thousands have fled to neighbouring India to escape army abuses under the former junta, according to rights groups.

In its annual report this year Amnesty International said Chin Christians still face persecution, citing the case of a preacher barred from speaking at a church and ordered to leave the area.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

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Default Re: My Ministry to The Japs - 09-10-2012, 05:48 PM

The way that slant-eyed trollop is chugging down that dessert dong really gets my dander up.



Also, as an American and an entrepreneur, I am outraged that the Japs didn't have the economic ingenuity to sell the testicles separately, and the testicles themselves individually. Their profits would have been tripled. Now, I am the humblest person on God's great, green earth--I literally taught lessons in humility at Oral Roberts University back in the '70s--but those tallywackers are laughable. I lost three quarters of my sizable Johnson back in the war, and I still have them beat by a long shot.
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Default Re: My Ministry to The Japs - 09-11-2012, 03:21 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post


Here's the local meat market. You don't wanna know.
I can't believe it! They sell their aborted babies at the meat market?!

And he's obviously the father. How cold can a man be?!


Bible boring? Nonsense!
Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!
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Default Re: My Ministry to The Japs - 09-11-2012, 05:07 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Old Man Hatchet View Post
The way that slant-eyed trollop is chugging down that dessert dong really gets my dander up.
Yeah, it's almost like you want to slap her in the back of the head and see how much she can really take.
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Default Re: My Ministry to The Japs - 09-11-2012, 10:20 PM

Are those things nip Twinkies®?


Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
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Default Re: My Ministry to The Japs - 09-12-2012, 11:32 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by James Hutchins View Post
Are those things nip Twinkies®?
Close. The correct term is nip dinkies.
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