Go Back   The Landover Baptist Church Forum > Church Forums > General Church Fellowship
Reload this Page Mixed Fibers
General Church Fellowship A place for True Christians to join in praise, faith and fellowship.

 
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Prev Previous Post   Next Post Next
(#1)
Old
Ezekiel Bathfire's Avatar
Ezekiel Bathfire Ezekiel Bathfire is offline
Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance
Christ's Rottweiler
 

One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College True Christian™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Christian Love Real American™ Tithing Manager Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS True Scientist™ Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Senior Pastor Teabag Patriot TC Bravery Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant The Hatchet Child Rearing Award Ex-Brit Eats the Most Pork True Republican Ex-eurotrash Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Kirk Cameron Fan Club Nuts for JESUS! Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus Stamp of Approval Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch Mower Donald Trump 2016! Anti-sodomy Pastor Ezekiel Aardvark Bathfire Crown of Life Alternative Facts Probing for Jesus 20,000 posts Saved 10 Years Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Anti-Biden

 
Posts: 22,727
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Toiling selflessly towards Salvation
Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Mixed Fibers - 03-19-2017, 01:47 PM

I have a difficulty.

The other day I was visiting a member of the congregation at his house when I saw the bootlaces pictured below.

Name:  Mixed Fibers.jpg
Views: 100
Size:  76.8 KB

Using my powers as a Pastor, I seized them as "possible abominations" under

Le:19:19: Ye shall keep my statutes. Thou shalt not let thy cattle gender with a diverse kind: thou shalt not sow thy field with mingled seed: neither shall a garment mingled of linen and woollen come upon thee.

and

De:22:11: Thou shalt not wear a garment of divers sorts, as of woollen and linen together.

The member (hereafter referred to as "the abomination") was asked for some reasonable explanation, and claimed that
(i) the verses in question applied only to Israelites and as he had the usual "Landover Certificate of Confirmation of Non-Semitic Origins" the law did not apply, and

(ii) There is no evidence to show that the laces are "wool and linen"

(ii) shoelaces are not "worn" and do not "come upon him" but "used".
The abomination (and all his family) is currently shunned from Landover.

My feeling is that a fair trail should be held and a conviction must be secured for the sake of public policy and to prevent further breaches of God's law on "technicalities." This will allow the eviction of the abomination and his family from Landover "as an example."

To counter his arguments:

(i) The limitation on "Israelites only" does not apply in the same way that Jesus said
M't:15:24: But he answered and said, I am not sent but unto the lost sheep of the house of Israel.

And we all know Jesus meant "everyone".

(ii) The "wool/cotton" question has been decided in "Landover v. Robertson (1792)" in which it was decided that "wool and linen" are simply examples as shown by

De:22:11: Thou shalt not wear a garment of divers sorts, as of woollen and linen together.

in which "as of" means "such as" or "for example."

(iii) Shoe laces are indeed "worn" and do "come upon" in the same way that "costly array" in

1Tm:2:9: In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;

This abomination's defense can be dismissed mainly because we can't have this sort of thing in Landover, but I would appreciate any agreement or other reasons why a conviction is certain before we proceed to trial and conviction.







“We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

Author of such illuminating essays as,
Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.
Reply With Quote
 

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Find Additional Forums Here



Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2022 all rights reserved