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Didn't write the Bible, just obeys it
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Posts: 6,639
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Jesus needs money, NOW -
12-30-2008, 02:40 AM
Dear Friends,
I am shocked and saddened by the explosion of stinginess and greed that has occured recently. I have seen some of the most generous tithers turn into penny-pinching misers of almost Judiac proportions! Worst of all are the excuses: "But I'm in debt" "I need to pay for my medical treatments" "But I need that money to feed my kids" - do you think Jesus has less problems than you? You think you or your fat kids need the money more than Jesus does? I urge everyone to read, re-read and then re-read again our Tithing FAQ.
Now, with that over with, let's talk about how to keep paying Jesus, despite the outbreak of laziness, greed and miserliness among the tin-tithers.
My answer: more gold and platinum tithers. This article explains how to get them:
The days of big spending are over for many Americans, but not for the high rollers...On a recent weekday night in the Hollywood Hills, jeweler Damiani and lifestyle magazine Angeleno took over a $9-million house with views of Los Angeles to throw a lavish party for potential customers...About 40 men in dark suits and women wearing pearls dined on frisee and filet mignon, then sipped champagne as they gazed at jewelry displays...
Such parties are becoming more common, and more extravagant, as marketers try to connect with rich clients in tough economic times.
Over-the-top affairs are out of the question for most companies as they try to tone down their marketing campaigns to match their shrinking revenue and the gloomy mood of consumers. But in luxury marketing, splashy events are back in vogue.
"In turbulent times, when consumer confidence is decreasing and consumption habits are changing, the most important thing is to gain loyalty from the core customer," said Claudia D'Arpizio, a luxury analyst with consulting firm Bain & Co...the economic slowdown is forcing them to focus on their core customers: high-net-worth individuals capable of spending thousands of dollars in one visit. Price cuts risk backfiring by diminishing a brand's exclusive image, so brands are reaching out on a personal level.
"We're trying to be much more targeted and give customers a more intimate experience with our brand," said Laurie Patruno, boutique manager for the new Damiani store on Rodeo Drive....
Retailers must go to extreme lengths to attract the interest of top spenders, said Alan Klein, Angeleno's president and group publisher.
He pointed to a recent example in which a high-end marketer invited potential clients to fly MiG jets. In Toronto, American Express invited its best clients to a dinner party -- in a room suspended 160 feet in the air by a crane -- that featured food from some of Canada's top chefs, said David Ghysels, a partner at Events in the Sky, which put on the dinner.
"The market's saturated; there are many, many events going on," said Dawn Moore, general manager of pearl store Mikimoto in Beverly Hills. "It's a new game and it takes a lot of creativity."
Equinox, the chain of posh fitness clubs, has recently eschewed billboard and magazine ads. It instead threw a party for a new gym opening, said West Coast marketing manager Christopher Lam. Equinox invited potential customers "with a certain salary" who worked at nearby companies to a bash where they were greeted by models, danced to music spun by DJ Splyce, noshed on tuna tartare and beef carpaccio, and left with $150 gift bags that included spa items, guest passes, clothing and silver bags.
"We found that it was more of an engaging experience to have them come and enjoy themselves at a different setting," he said...
At a black-tie event for VIPs, jet maker Bombardier served wine and champagne at a bar flanked by a big-screen TV showing interiors of its planes.
At another event, Emirates Airlines paid singer Ricky Martin more than half a million dollars to perform at a party kicking off its entry into the Los Angeles market (Martin changed the words of a song to mention Dubai, where the airline is based). Guests chose from menu options such as "A California collection of luxury West Coast seafood with lobster, king prawn and a timbale of crab with avocado, tomato and Meyer lemon puree," and they left with a glossy coffee-table book about Emirates.
At the Damiani-Angeleno event, the companies' brands -- along with others including Fiji Water -- were printed on the menu and splashed on door-sized posters around the house. Damiani staff members at the dinner party wore sample diamond jewelry worth tens of thousands of dollars.
That the events are getting more lavish at a time of rising unemployment and economic uncertainties isn't lost on guests or planners...
Now, I would never suggest having an illegal alien like Rikki Marten sing at our events, but you get the idea. Just do what the article says: focus on the core consumer.
And as for the misers who turned away Jesus in his hour of financial need - we know who you are, and we have long memories.
Disagree? By failing to register and debate me, you prove that liberals are factless frauds who only persuade through intimidation. To prove otherwise, debate me!
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Senior Pastor VP of Evangelical Outreach On FIRE for Jesus
True Christian™
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Posts: 6,016
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Libertydale, NC
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Re: Jesus needs money, NOW -
12-30-2008, 04:03 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jeb Thurmond
Worst of all are the excuses: "But I'm in debt" "I need to pay for my medical treatments" "But I need that money to feed my kids"
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Amen, Brother! Allow me to preach on this a little bit.
If you are making excuses instead of tithing, it proves you don't trust God and it's a pretty big clue that you aren't saved. You aren't putting God first. If you sow sparingly, you will reap sparingly. Tithing is the best investment you can make. When someone tells me they can't afford to tithe, I tell them that they can't afford NOT to tithe! If you tithe cheerfully and generously, God will make sure that you always have everything you need. 2Cor 9:6-8.
If you are saved, then what are you worried about? Jesus said this:
Matt 6:26 Behold the fowls of the air: for they sow not, neither do they reap, nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feedeth them. Are ye not much better than they?
Birds don't have 401(k)'s. They don't save for retirement or for their nestlings' college education. They don't own real estate or automobiles. They don't need to do any of that because God takes care of them. Jesus said that you don't need savings either. God will take care of you.
Matt 6:28 And why take ye thought for raiment? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow; they toil not, neither do they spin:
Matt 6:29 And yet I say unto you, That even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these.
Matt 6:30 Wherefore, if God so clothe the grass of the field, which to day is, and to morrow is cast into the oven, shall he not much more clothe you, O ye of little faith?
Matt 6:31 Therefore take no thought, saying, What shall we eat? or, What shall we drink? or, Wherewithal shall we be clothed?
Don't worry about having enough money to eat or buy clothes. God will provide it for you. If you worry about that sort of thing, it shows that you don't have much faith in the Lord.
Pastor Billy-Reuben
Upon request I will cite scripture for all these facts in God's Holy Word.
✝ This is a Christian community and we worship GOD of the Holy bible, the only Living GOD. We worship Jesus Christ, Son of GOD and Savior. Anything else is absurd. ✝
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Didn't write the Bible, just obeys it
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Posts: 6,639
Join Date: Jun 2007
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Re: Jesus needs money, NOW -
12-30-2008, 07:28 PM
I have just found a perfect location for our fundraising event:
The $37,000,000 apartment that was just bought by former executive vice president at Merrill Lynch Morgage Investors inc, Peter Kraus. Peter, who works so hard he earned a $25,000,000 bonus for 3 months work, sounds like a real True Christian kind of guy. He sure knows how taxpayers want the wall-street bailout to be spent - creating jobs and helping real estate prices.
Some details on the apartment:
The baronial living room has 11' ceilings with exquisite crown molding, a wood burning fireplace and intricate parquetry floors. The formal dining room is grand for entertaining but cozy enough for family suppers with its wood burning fireplace. The beautiful in-laid floors are repeated here and the dental crown molding, plaster relief encircling the chandelier and rich Venetian plaster walls make for a stunning room. The library off the living room is paneled in rich mahogany and has a third wood burning fireplace...Much original brass hardware, bullet door hinges and key holes remain intact on the heavy, six-panel doors. There is a sound system, pin-spot lighting throughout the public rooms and through the wall air conditioning. Additionally, the building has a dedicated, full time staff, private storage, wine cellar, squash court and fitness room...
Tax deduction: 38%
Disagree? By failing to register and debate me, you prove that liberals are factless frauds who only persuade through intimidation. To prove otherwise, debate me!
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Senior Pastor Ex-liberal; converted to True Christianity™ Always Biblically correct
True Christian™
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Posts: 10,667
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: 13706 Levite's Sojourn Terr., Gibeah Hill, Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Jesus needs money, NOW -
12-31-2008, 12:46 PM
Our Lord expects nothing less.
Matt. 26:7-13: There came unto him a woman having an alabaster box of very precious ointment, and poured it on his head, as he sat [at meat]. But when his disciples saw [it], they had indignation, saying, To what purpose [is] this waste? For this ointment might have been sold for much, and given to the poor. When Jesus understood [it], he said unto them, Why trouble ye the woman? for she hath wrought a good work upon me. For ye have the poor always with you; but me ye have not always. For in that she hath poured this ointment on my body, she did [it] for my burial. Verily I say unto you, Wheresoever this gospel shall be preached in the whole world, [there] shall also this, that this woman hath done, be told for a memorial of her.
This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.
Questions to ask liberal "Christians" ✞ Things that the Bible doesn't say ✞ Tolerance
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Didn't write the Bible, just obeys it
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Posts: 6,639
Join Date: Jun 2007
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Re: Jesus needs money, NOW -
03-10-2010, 05:54 AM
For the last time, no more blaming the economy for a lack of money to donate! The economy is only bad for lazy people: Reuters: The number of U.S. households with a net worth of at least $1 million jumped 16 percent last year...ultra high net worth families -- those with at least $5 million -- grew 17 percent last year to 980,000...
Disagree? By failing to register and debate me, you prove that liberals are factless frauds who only persuade through intimidation. To prove otherwise, debate me!
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
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Posts: 79,910
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Jesus needs money, NOW -
03-10-2010, 06:23 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jeb Thurmond
For the last time, no more blaming the economy for a lack of money to donate! The economy is only bad for lazy people: Reuters: The number of U.S. households with a net worth of at least $1 million jumped 16 percent last year...ultra high net worth families -- those with at least $5 million -- grew 17 percent last year to 980,000...
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And praise Jesus, a few dozen of them live in Freehold!
Get your Harvest people. Jesus is ready to drench you in Blessings!!
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
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Didn't write the Bible, just obeys it
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Posts: 6,639
Join Date: Jun 2007
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Re: Jesus needs money, NOW -
07-29-2010, 08:31 PM
Bumping this thread because an undisclosed source I know - an expert of sorts in the field - reports to me that a certain local celebrity, I'll call him Mr. "Magnet" Broccollini", invented the line "Do you like that? Yeah?" which has since become a cornerstone of his particular genre of motion picture.
Though I'm not certain exactly how royalties work, I do believe this makes him several million dollars wealthier than he claims to be. Mr. Broccolli, that money belongs to God! Tithe NOW!
Disagree? By failing to register and debate me, you prove that liberals are factless frauds who only persuade through intimidation. To prove otherwise, debate me!
Got Questions? See Frequently Asked Questions, or use Forum Search, tag system, or our guides on Geography, History, Science, Comparative Religion, Civics, and Current Events.
Did I use a new word you've never heard? Definitions here. | Vote! Everything you need to vote here!
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Unsaved trash, firewater-gulping squaw
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Posts: 183
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Re: Jesus needs money, NOW -
07-29-2010, 08:42 PM
If Jesus is in heaven, where the streets are made of gold, and the buildings are mare of precious stones, why does he need my grocery money?
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#63 on Forbes'...but #1 in Jesus's Heart
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Posts: 6,234
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Freehold, Ia
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Re: Jesus needs money, NOW -
07-29-2010, 08:45 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jeb Thurmond
Bumping this thread because an undisclosed source I know - an expert of sorts in the field - reports to me that a certain local celebrity, I'll call him Mr. "Magnet" Broccollini", invented the line "Do you like that? Yeah?" which has since become a cornerstone of his particular genre of motion picture.
Though I'm not certain exactly how royalties work, I do believe this makes him several million dollars wealthier than he claims to be. Mr. Broccolli, that money belongs to God! Tithe NOW!
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Sweet Jesus, Its not me, the check I cut last week was bigger than the operating budget of Freehold township for a year.
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Ladies of Landover Senior VP One of the Truest Christians™ Ever Mama Grizzly and formerly Sister Mary Maria
True Christian™
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Posts: 12,662
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Standing behind my husband
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Re: Jesus needs money, NOW -
07-29-2010, 08:47 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tchoupitoulas
why does He need my grocery money?
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Don't start jooing Jesus out of what's rightfully His! Pay up, missy, or you will be in for a world of eternal damnation!
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Landover Security Superviser Asset Loss Prevention and Personal Security Expert NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
True Christian™
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Posts: 18,554
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold Iowa
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Re: Jesus needs money, NOW -
07-29-2010, 08:52 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tchoupitoulas
If Jesus is in heaven, where the streets are made of gold, and the buildings are mare of precious stones, why does he need my grocery money?
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Friend,
If you loan someone money, you would expect them to pay it back? Right? How much money Christ owns, or the fact The Lord can will precious metals out of thin air has nothing to do with it. It's His money and He wants it back.
Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.
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Unsaved trash, firewater-gulping squaw
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Posts: 183
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Re: Jesus needs money, NOW -
07-29-2010, 08:53 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sister Mary Maria
Don't start jooing Jesus out of what's rightfully His! Pay up, missy, or you will be in for a world of eternal damnation!
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I worked for it; it belongs to me. Even if I wanted to donate some of it to Jesus, I don't have enough stamps to mail a check to heaven.
I think I'll just pick up a few extra groceries and donate them to the homeless shelter. If Jesus were still alive, it's what he would do.
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Unsaved trash, firewater-gulping squaw
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Posts: 183
Join Date: Jul 2010
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Re: Jesus needs money, NOW -
07-29-2010, 09:05 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bobby-Joe
Friend,
If you loan someone money, you would expect them to pay it back? Right? How much money Christ owns, or the fact The Lord can will precious metals out of thin air has nothing to do with it. It's His money and He wants it back.
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Jesus didn't lend me money - I work for my paycheck.
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Biblical Poet, Warrior and Scholar Biblical Black Belt Jr. Pastor
True Christian™
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Posts: 6,232
Join Date: Dec 2008
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Re: Jesus needs money, NOW -
07-29-2010, 09:29 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tchoupitoulas
I worked for it; it belongs to me. Even if I wanted to donate some of it to Jesus, I don't have enough stamps to mail a check to heaven.
I think I'll just pick up a few extra groceries and donate them to the homeless shelter. If Jesus were still alive, it's what he would do.
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No, it isn't. Jesus spoke out against giving money to the poor instead of giving it to him.
John 12:3T hen Mary took about a pint of pure nard, an expensive perfume; she poured it on Jesus' feet and wiped his feet with her hair. And the house was filled with the fragrance of the perfume.
4But one of his disciples, Judas Iscariot, who was later to betray him, objected, 5 "Why wasn't this perfume sold and the money given to the poor? It was worth a year's wages." 6He did not say this because he cared about the poor but because he was a thief; as keeper of the money bag, he used to help himself to what was put into it.
7"Leave her alone," Jesus replied. " It was intended that she should save this perfume for the day of my burial. 8 You will always have the poor among you, but you will not always have me."
As this story teaches, if you say you want to give money to the poor instead of Jesus, it's because you are a greedy thief.
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Biblical Poet, Warrior and Scholar Biblical Black Belt Jr. Pastor
True Christian™
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Posts: 6,232
Join Date: Dec 2008
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Re: Jesus needs money, NOW -
07-29-2010, 09:31 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tchoupitoulas
Jesus didn't lend me money - I work for my paycheck.
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James 1: 17Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness, neither shadow of turning.
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Unsaved trash, firewater-gulping squaw
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Posts: 183
Join Date: Jul 2010
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Re: Jesus needs money, NOW -
07-29-2010, 09:34 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Heathen_Basher
No, it isn't. Jesus spoke out against giving money to the poor instead of giving it to him.
John 12:3Then Mary took about a pint of pure nard, an expensive perfume; she poured it on Jesus' feet and wiped his feet with her hair. And the house was filled with the fragrance of the perfume.
4But one of his disciples, Judas Iscariot, who was later to betray him, objected, 5"Why wasn't this perfume sold and the money given to the poor? It was worth a year's wages." 6He did not say this because he cared about the poor but because he was a thief; as keeper of the money bag, he used to help himself to what was put into it.
7"Leave her alone," Jesus replied. " It was intended that she should save this perfume for the day of my burial. 8You will always have the poor among you, but you will not always have me."
As this story teaches, if you say you want to give money to the poor instead of Jesus, it's because you are a greedy thief.
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I said I was going to give FOOD to the HUNGRY- which your book says Jesus did with fish and bread.
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#63 on Forbes'...but #1 in Jesus's Heart
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Posts: 6,234
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Freehold, Ia
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Re: Jesus needs money, NOW -
07-29-2010, 09:50 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tchoupitoulas
I worked for it; it belongs to me. Even if I wanted to donate some of it to Jesus, I don't have enough stamps to mail a check to heaven.
I think I'll just pick up a few extra groceries and donate them to the homeless shelter. If Jesus were still alive, it's what he would do.
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You don't send the check directly to Jesus, don't be stupid. Send a cashiers check to Landover Baptist Church , PO Box 156, Freehold IA. C/o the Pastors fund. They will make sure Jesus gets the receipt.
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Biblical Poet, Warrior and Scholar Biblical Black Belt Jr. Pastor
True Christian™
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Posts: 6,232
Join Date: Dec 2008
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Re: Jesus needs money, NOW -
07-29-2010, 09:51 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tchoupitoulas
I said I was going to give FOOD to the HUNGRY- which your book says Jesus did with fish and bread.
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Those people weren't POOR. They were people who traveled to listen to Jesus teachings. Jesus was simply handing out blessings to his followers, as always
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#63 on Forbes'...but #1 in Jesus's Heart
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Posts: 6,234
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Freehold, Ia
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Re: Jesus needs money, NOW -
07-29-2010, 09:54 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Heathen_Basher
Those people weren't POOR. They were people who traveled to listen to Jesus teachings. Jesus was simply handing out blessings to his followers, as always
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Its no different than when you stop by, I am obliged to offer refreshments to my brethren. But that does not get me out of my obligation to Jesus, he still gets my 20% before taxes( net not take home) as it should be.
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Unsaved trash, firewater-gulping squaw
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Posts: 183
Join Date: Jul 2010
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Re: Jesus needs money, NOW -
07-29-2010, 09:55 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by James Dewitt
You don't send the check directly to Jesus, don't be stupid. Send a cashiers check to Landover Baptist Church , PO Box 156, Freehold IA. C/o the Pastors fund. They will make sure Jesus gets the receipt.
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I don't donate money to any organization unless I approve of how it's going to be spent. What exactly is this Pastor's Fund used for?
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