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Landover Security Superviser Asset Loss Prevention and Personal Security Expert NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
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RUMOR CONTROL: Professor Bessemer is NOT injured -
03-08-2012, 05:56 PM
I would like to put a stop to the rumor that Professor Bessemer is hospitalized after a brutal bum attack today. I just have seen and talked to the Professor and he is good health and Pastor Zeke is tending to his spiritual needs.
The rumor is Professor Bessemer was attacked by a bum with a machete because the bum wanted the bottle of alcohol Professor Bessemer had. This is FALSE.
The true story is Professor Bessemer was doing a Christian Economics experiment on supply and demand that apparently went wrong. Professor Bessemer took ten bums, gave them each a machete, placed them in a box car and then set bottle of grain alcohol down in the middle of them. The bums were told that only one bum could get to drink the alcohol and then Professor Bessemer locked the doors for the box car for a four hour period.
I am sure Professor Bessmemer will be along to explain the science behind this but from what I understand, the hardest working bum would take the bottle of booze and then other nine bums would pull themselves up by their boot straps by making their own bottle of booze out of materials available in a locked, empty box car. As you can see this is all basic Austrian School economics the world uses every day.
Well something when wrong and instead of making their own bottles the ten bums viciously attacked each other with the machetes like rabid wolves. Four of them have died so far and the other six are hospitalized. And the bottle of alcohol was knocked over.
Obviously Professor Bessemer is shocked by this, he is a professional after all and takes great pride in furthering human knowledge by providing proof for the conclusions of science. I am sure he will get back on that horse and have another ten bums lined up, but please find the time to offer Professor Bessemer your support.
Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.
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Professor of Creation Science at Landover University Double PhD. Theomathematics, Racial Science Returned from 10 year South Africa Expedition
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Re: RUMOR CONTROL: Professor Bessemer is NOT injured -
03-08-2012, 06:20 PM
Thank you for clearing that up Brother-Joe. Scientheism can sometimes be a bit, shall we say, unpredictable. Also, if we knew exactly what was going to happen beforehand, there would be no reason to do the experiment in the first place.
And even though the outcome of this particular situation was not what I had predicted, valuable lessons were learned. In hindsight, I believe that not having any lighting whatsoever in the rail car was a mistake. Also, and this I blame on my assistant Armand, there were only supposed to be three machetes total in the box car. And finally, the 120 decibel noise generator may have caused more anxiety and confusion than was necessary.
Professor of Creation Science at Landover Baptist University
Sodomites! Stop being gay TODAY!
Wherefore lay apart all filthiness and superfluity of naughtiness, and receive with meekness the engrafted word, which is able to save your souls. James 1:21
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Landover Security Superviser Asset Loss Prevention and Personal Security Expert NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
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Re: RUMOR CONTROL: Professor Bessemer is NOT injured -
03-08-2012, 06:29 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Professor Bessemer
Thank you for clearing that up Brother-Joe. Scientheism can sometimes be a bit, shall we say, unpredictable. Also, if we knew exactly what was going to happen beforehand, there would be no reason to do the experiment in the first place.
And even though the outcome of this particular situation was not what I had predicted, valuable lessons were learned. In hindsight, I believe that not having any lighting whatsoever in the rail car was a mistake. Also, and this I blame on my assistant Armand, there were only supposed to be three machetes total in the box car. And finally, the 120 decibel noise generator may have caused more anxiety and confusion than was necessary.
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Well for what is worth Professor from what I saw my conclusion is "science is predictable, people aren't". Likely one of the bums was a Democrat and thought he was entailed to the alcohol and too lazy to be a producer.
Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.
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True Christian™ Princess The Driving Force behind RA12 Have at it, anytime!
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Re: RUMOR CONTROL: Professor Bessemer is NOT injured -
03-08-2012, 06:42 PM
I'm so Thankful that "Bessie" is all Right!
As of course we all are at Landover Baptist Church, "God's Favorite Church"
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Psychotheological Analyst Therapist
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Re: RUMOR CONTROL: Professor Bessemer is NOT injured -
03-08-2012, 06:47 PM
As an fellow scientologist I applaud your attempt to further the scope of our knowledge. It is such a shame when confounding variables affect one's ability to draw conclusions but it will definitely give you a lot to write about in your discussion.
I might exhort you to be more careful with your assistant: it's seems like they accept anyone on PHd courses these days.
YIC
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Re: RUMOR CONTROL: Professor Bessemer is NOT injured -
03-08-2012, 07:03 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Larni69
As an fellow scientologist I applaud your attempt to further the scope of our knowledge. It is such a shame when confounding variables affect one's ability to draw conclusions but it will definitely give you a lot to write about in your discussion.
I might exhort you to be more careful with your assistant: it's seems like they accept anyone on PHd courses these days.
YIC
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Friend, I do hope that's a typo. There are no Scientologists here.
Back on topic, I'm glad to hear Professor Gossamer was not injured, and that several Communists have self-selected for removal from the gene pool.
Bible boring? Nonsense!
Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!
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Psychotheological Analyst Therapist
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03-08-2012, 07:20 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rev. M. Rodimer
Friend, I do hope that's a typo. There are no Scientologists here.
Back on topic, I'm glad to hear Professor Gossamer was not injured, and that several Communists have self-selected for removal from the gene pool.
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Praise you Rev Rodimer.
Satan has infested my device and I will immediately be calling the Dept of Disturbing Device Decontamination.
It should have read 'scientheist'
YIC
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Professor of Creation Science at Landover University Double PhD. Theomathematics, Racial Science Returned from 10 year South Africa Expedition
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Re: RUMOR CONTROL: Professor Bessemer is NOT injured -
03-08-2012, 07:21 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rev. M. Rodimer
Friend, I do hope that's a typo. There are no Scientologists here.
Back on topic, I'm glad to hear Professor Gossamer was not injured, and that several Communists have self-selected for removal from the gene pool.
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I am certain that Brother Larni meant Scientheist. The issue is the secular auto correct function on many of these newer electronic devices. Did you know that if you try type Hell on an iPad, it changes it to He'll? It is just another attempt to secularize and homosexualize America by liberal elite.
It is reasons like this that I keep striving forward in my scientheistic pursuits. If I have to sacrifice 10,000 homeless men to keep Americans free to type the word Hell, I will do it! Praise!
EDIT: I see that Brother Larni has posted his correction. Scientheism and sciencology are closely related terms, referring to similar but subtly different Bible based research pursuits.
Professor of Creation Science at Landover Baptist University
Sodomites! Stop being gay TODAY!
Wherefore lay apart all filthiness and superfluity of naughtiness, and receive with meekness the engrafted word, which is able to save your souls. James 1:21
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Landover Security Superviser Asset Loss Prevention and Personal Security Expert NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
True Christian™
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Re: RUMOR CONTROL: Professor Bessemer is NOT injured -
03-08-2012, 07:27 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rev. M. Rodimer
Back on topic, I'm glad to hear Professor Gossamer was not injured, and that several Communists have self-selected for removal from the gene pool.
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Perhaps, from what I have been told the bums were collected at a Dr Ron Paul rally last week. After a medical examination there were screened for their political views to weed any freeloader types.
For example I noticed one of the hospitalized bums was clearly delusional from his injuries and kept on moaning "get your hands off my bottle you moochers", another one asked were was the corpse of one of the bums that died in the three hour long melee because he "eats what he kills" and another bum demanded to know if he was getting socialized medicine because he's against hand outs.
Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.
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Landover Security Superviser Asset Loss Prevention and Personal Security Expert NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
True Christian™
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Posts: 18,554
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold Iowa
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Re: RUMOR CONTROL: Professor Bessemer is NOT injured -
03-08-2012, 10:01 PM
Some information that went wrong from our interviews with the surviving bums
Officer: Can you please tell us what the fight was about?
Bum: Over the booze man
Officer: The booze? You all were supposed to make that.
Bum: How dude, the door to the box car was locked?
Officer: The experiment was meant to show you have resourceful people are when they don't have government handouts.
Bum: tell me about it, those deadbeats wanted my bottle
Officer: Oh, go on?
Bum: That's went the fight started. I am in the top 10% so I am not about to share with some lazy moochers like those other nine guys. I worked hard to get were I am in life!
Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
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Re: RUMOR CONTROL: Professor Bessemer is NOT injured -
03-09-2012, 06:12 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bobby-Joe
I would like to put a stop to the rumor that Professor Bessemer is hospitalized after a brutal bum attack today. I just have seen and talked to the Professor and he is good health and Pastor Zeke is tending to his spiritual needs.
The rumor is Professor Bessemer was attacked by a bum with a machete because the bum wanted the bottle of alcohol Professor Bessemer had. This is FALSE.
The true story is Professor Bessemer was doing a Christian Economics experiment on supply and demand that apparently went wrong. Professor Bessemer took ten bums, gave them each a machete, placed them in a box car and then set bottle of grain alcohol down in the middle of them. The bums were told that only one bum could get to drink the alcohol and then Professor Bessemer locked the doors for the box car for a four hour period.
I am sure Professor Bessmemer will be along to explain the science behind this but from what I understand, the hardest working bum would take the bottle of booze and then other nine bums would pull themselves up by their boot straps by making their own bottle of booze out of materials available in a locked, empty box car. As you can see this is all basic Austrian School economics the world uses every day.
Well something when wrong and instead of making their own bottles the ten bums viciously attacked each other with the machetes like rabid wolves. Four of them have died so far and the other six are hospitalized. And the bottle of alcohol was knocked over.
Obviously Professor Bessemer is shocked by this, he is a professional after all and takes great pride in furthering human knowledge by providing proof for the conclusions of science. I am sure he will get back on that horse and have another ten bums lined up, but please find the time to offer Professor Bessemer your support.
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Nobody would believe a story like this, but luckily, the good Professor had the God-given sense to video tape the whole thing. A private screening for Platinum Tither men and above will be help in my private screening room in the Southern wing of my estate this coming Saturday night.
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
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Re: RUMOR CONTROL: Professor Bessemer is NOT injured -
03-09-2012, 07:14 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel
Nobody would believe a story like this, but luckily, the good Professor had the God-given sense to video tape the whole thing. A private screening for Platinum Tither men and above will be help in my private screening room in the Southern wing of my estate this coming Saturday night.
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Zeke, I wonder if Landover has considered pay-per-view?
I know there are plenty of men in my congregation who are interested in the Professor's scientheistic experiments, and would gladly pay $6.99 to watch pre-recorded video-on-demand, or maybe $15.99 for live events.
Bible boring? Nonsense!
Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!
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Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
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Re: RUMOR CONTROL: Professor Bessemer is NOT injured -
03-09-2012, 09:28 AM
Thank you so much, Bobby Joe, for posting this thread! I'm embarrassed to admit I was one of the gullible fools who fell for the Facebook rumor and changed my Facebook profile pic to a photo of Professor Bessemer in order to show my support and urged everybody to copy and re-share a prayer for the professor as their Facebook status.
Next time I'll do a little checking before I buy into such things.
WARNING:
In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.
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Professor of Creation Science at Landover University Double PhD. Theomathematics, Racial Science Returned from 10 year South Africa Expedition
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Re: RUMOR CONTROL: Professor Bessemer is NOT injured -
03-09-2012, 09:40 AM
I had hoped to discuss this issue in private, but as it has been raised here, I feel obligated to address it now. Due to the fact that no lights were installed in the rail car, the only video cameras that captured any usable video images of the experiment were the infrared and the night vision feeds, and the almost total lack of light rendered the night vision video substandard at best.
The video evidence of my less than successful experiment, while sufficient for scientheistic interpretation, is hardly what one would call entertainment quality. I apologize to all concerned for the oversights that led to the present situation.
But on the bright side, we do still have 13 prescreened and inoculated individuals who have consented to be test subjects for round two of our trials. The tentative date of that trial will be announced as soon as we complete the arena complex now under construction. This time, we will have state of the art lighting, high speed multiple camera HD video, and due to a special pastoral request, 360 degree live seating, for qualified scientheists and their guests.
Professor of Creation Science at Landover Baptist University
Sodomites! Stop being gay TODAY!
Wherefore lay apart all filthiness and superfluity of naughtiness, and receive with meekness the engrafted word, which is able to save your souls. James 1:21
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Psychotheological Analyst Therapist
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Posts: 9,051
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Surrounded by queers.
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Re: RUMOR CONTROL: Professor Bessemer is NOT injured -
03-09-2012, 09:47 AM
Might I suggest that you double blind the study? That way any bias the subjects participants or researchers may hold can be reasonably controlled for.
I look forwards to reading your findings.
YIC
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True Christian™ Princess The Driving Force behind RA12 Have at it, anytime!
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Re: RUMOR CONTROL: Professor Bessemer is NOT injured -
03-09-2012, 03:06 PM
Sonny Bono, the Dead sciencewhatever guy. Well I'll be washed and ironed and starched!
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Landover Security Superviser Asset Loss Prevention and Personal Security Expert NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
True Christian™
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Re: RUMOR CONTROL: Professor Bessemer is NOT injured -
03-09-2012, 05:28 PM
Well we finished the interviews with the surviving Bums from the first experiment but except for one guy who mistakenly registered with the Peace and Freedom party once they rest are register Republicans like proper libertarians. If there was a socialist like a Democrat in that group sabotaging the expermint like Professor Bessemer thinks he did a good job hiding it.
When we asked one of the bums was he a Democrat his reply was
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bum
What do I look like, a slacker to you? I've worked hard all my life out there with my sign on my street corner every day of the week. I have never, ever taken a hand out from anybody and that's a fact. I DO NOT want my charity socialized
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Well at lest this time we are doing a DOF background check before the experiment.
Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.
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