[Brother Cletus]

Praise be to the Most High, brothers and sisters! I thank God through the precious name of Jesus that I found you Godly folks shedding the light of the gospel on these Godless Internets. Why, it ain't easy to come along True Christians in this devil's den. But I tell you, friends, I kept persistin'. I stayed the course, and didn't cut and run. And my efforts were rewarded by the Lord a-leadin' me here. Glory!!!

Now a little about myself. I'm a deacon in a fundamentalist, independent Baptist Church way down here in Dothan, Alabama, one of God's favorite places because the sweet and blessed feet of Judge Roy Moore have tread here more than once. Not to mention the fact that this is also a beloved resting stop for the living representative of God's will on earth, our great and anointed leader, George W. Bush. Praise!!!

My hobbies include fishin', huntin', shootin', casting devils out of Demoncrats and Episcopalians, protesting abortion clinics, fundraising for the NRA, burning rock n roll albums (except Ted Nugent ones), teaching Bible School and Creation Science, and voting Republican. I look forward to fellowshipping with you good folks on this here True Christian forum! Glory!!!!

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Welcome friend. Would you care to share some of your favorite scriptures with us?

[Dr. Ernest C. Ville, D.C.S.]

Welcome, friend -- have you a favorite verse you might share with us? Have you tithed to Jesus yet? Glory, another lamb has joined the flock!

[Brother Temperance]

Originally Posted by Brother Cletus

My hobbies include fishin', huntin', shootin', casting devils out of Demoncrats and Episcopalians...

Praise! Right now, our boards are infested by a crazed Episcopalian who is possessed by a demon of atheism, so if you could fix her head, we'd be much obliged.

[Brother Cletus]

Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel

Welcome friend. Would you care to share some of your favorite scriptures with us?

Brother Zeke, I'd be right proud to. One of my favorites is Exodus 22:18

"Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live."

Now brothers and sisters, like me you are probably fed up by now with being persecuted when we try to practice our religion. Every time we try to practice our right to religious freedom, we are persecuted by sickular society for it. If you don't believe me, try grabbing some Godless, hellbound little Wiccan next time you see one, and then try practicing our religion with her. It'll baffle your mind at how quickly the sickular humanists in the court system will persecute you for it.

Another one of my favorites is Leviticus 20:13

"If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them."

Now friends, this is why I get so mad every time I hear about "gay rights". The only "rights" these homersekshul sodomites have is the right to be stoned by True Christians at the Town Square. Come to think of it, all these communist pinko Demoncrat tree-huggin' hippies should get stoned too, and I don't mean in a Woodstock sorta way.

Deutoronomy 16:22

"Neither shalt thou set thee up any image; which the LORD thy God hateth."

Now brothers and sisters, this verse condemns the idolatrous practice of them old cookie-worshipin' hellbound Cathylicks. Those pagan servants of the devil set up images which the Lord hateth and fall down on their knees before them faster than Linda Lovelace in the L.A. Lakers locker room. It ain't nothing but a blasphemy how them Cathylickers prays to dead folks and count rosary beans like that was gonna get them to heaven. Well, I got news for those little papist devils. Ain't nobody gonna get into heaven by countin' beans or anything else. Math was an invention of the devil to confuse the people of God. For God is not the author of confusion (I Corinthians 14:33).

[Brother Cletus]

Originally Posted by Brother Temperance

Praise! Right now, our boards are infested by a crazed Episcopalian who is possessed by a demon of atheism, so if you could fix her head, we'd be much obliged.

Brother Temperance, it will be my pleasure to try, and with the Lord's help, will rid this person of the foul demon of Episcopalianism. That church is straight from the devil himself, with their ordainin' womenfolk and making alcoholic homersekshuls into bishops and all. They also preach this tooty-fruity gospel about love and caring for everybody, and all sorts of other liberal Jesus-hatin' crap. They even reject Creation Science and believe that we come from monkeys. They can't get it through their silly hellbound skulls that evilution is just a theory, and our Talking Snake Theory is every bit as valid....and even more valid because God Himself said it and He was there! Glory!

Q: Why don't Episcopalians play chess?

A: Because they can't tell the difference between bishops and queens!

Praise!

[Mrs. Mary Whitford]

Praise Jesus! With so many witches, atheisn'ts, and false Christians who come to our Godly board, it's a real blessing to see someone join us who has the Holy Spirit strong within him!

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Why Hello Brother Cletus,

It always refreshing to see new members. You sound delightful!

Tell me Brother, are you single? If yes, please stop by this post.

http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showt...90689post90689

You just might like what you find!

Welcome to GOD'S Favorite Church!

Lve, Sister Thumper

[SalvationSeeker]

Welcome, brother.
Yes, it's very nice to see a sane person join for once.
Most of the visitors we get here are dumb and hateful atheists, only here to persecute Jesus elect.
So it's good indeed to get another voice of reason in the forums, to counter all the sickular madness we're constantly bombarded with.

[Pastor Isaac Peters]

I bid you welcome in Christ's abundant love. From your posts so far on God's favorite discussion forums, I see that you have not been fooled by all of the secular nonsense from the liberal MSM and the teachers' unions. I look forward to fellowshipping with you.

[Warrior in Christ]

Brother Cletus,

What are your thoughts on the evil mudslime uprising in Europe?


What do you feel, as a Godly republican nation, America's best course of action will be to fix these problems?

-WIC

[Sister Noddy]

Originally Posted by Brother Cletus

Now a little about myself. I'm a deacon in a fundamentalist, independent Baptist Church way down here in Dothan, Alabama, one of God's favorite places because ...

... Glory!!!!

Welcome to the forum Brother Cletus, from Sister Noddy