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Default Re: How the King James Bible saved me from anal sex! - 09-26-2011, 04:04 PM

I would embrace God if he was good instead of evil. I mean, he doesnt even follow his own rules. what kind of father figure is he.. Thank God for Buddhism


Ecclesiastes 4:5 The fool foldeth his hands together, and eateth his own flesh.
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Default Re: How the King James Bible saved me from anal sex! - 09-26-2011, 04:35 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by andreas.karlssson View Post
Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Temperance View Post
FACT: In Genesis, it says God created the Earth and everything in it.
FACT: The Earth and everything in it exists, exactly as Genesis predicts it does.
CONCLUSION: The Bible must be true, because if it wasn't true, the world wouldn't exist.
Well this is a problem, those arent facts, facts can be proven in real life by tests and so on.. It's your belief that its that way, its not undisputed facts...
Andreas, which facts stated by brother Temperance cannot be proven?

1) “in Genesis, it says God created the Earth and everything in it” – a proof: Genesis 1:1-31
2) “The Earth and everything in it exists” – a proof: look around yourself.

Typically, hateists resort to circular reasoning when empirical facts contradict their theories or simply declare world around them as delusion. Isn’t that sad?

Quote:
Originally Posted by andreas.karlssson View Post
I would embrace God if he was good instead of evil. I mean, he doesnt even follow his own rules...
And which are the "rules He doesn't even follow"?

YiC, DUH


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... your choice entirely (Matthew 12:30)
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Default Re: How the King James Bible saved me from anal sex! - 09-26-2011, 05:42 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dan U. Holier View Post
Andreas, which facts stated by brother Temperance cannot be proven?

1) “in Genesis, it says God created the Earth and everything in it” – a proof: Genesis 1:1-31
2) “The Earth and everything in it exists” – a proof: look around yourself.

Typically, hateists resort to circular reasoning when empirical facts contradict their theories or simply declare world around them as delusion. Isn’t that sad?


And which are the "rules He doesn't even follow"?

YiC, DUH
Scientists typically blame the bible for circular reasoning because it is, how can you prove God created the earth without using the bible?(cause if you use it it's circular reasoning so..)

And "you shall not kill" <- God doesn't follow that rule. DUH! He even tells us to break his rules sometimes xD


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Default Re: How the King James Bible saved me from anal sex! - 09-26-2011, 06:34 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by andreas.karlssson View Post
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dan U. Holier View Post
Typically, hateists resort to circular reasoning when empirical facts contradict their theories or simply declare world around them as delusion...
Scientists typically blame the bible for circular reasoning because it is, how can you prove God created the earth without using the bible?(cause if you use it it's circular reasoning so..)
Typically, after their failed attempts at circular reasoning, hateists resort to projecting: “No, it wasn’t me, but you!”

Quote:
Originally Posted by andreas.karlssson View Post
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dan U. Holier View Post
And which are the "rules He doesn't even follow"?
And "you shall not kill" <- God doesn't follow that rule. DUH! He even tells us to break his rules sometimes xD
You should learn about the difference between 1st and 2nd grammatical person (“I shall” vs. “you shall”). Secondly, this is a general commandment that doesn’t apply in every situation - the same as by secular laws; isn’t killing justified in self-defense, to punish criminals or to preemptively strike against enemies of the US of A?

YiC, DUH


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Default Re: How the King James Bible saved me from anal sex! - 09-26-2011, 07:40 PM

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Originally Posted by Dan U. Holier View Post
Typically, after their failed attempts at circular reasoning, hateists resort to projecting: “No, it wasn’t me, but you!”


You should learn about the difference between 1st and 2nd grammatical person (“I shall” vs. “you shall”). Secondly, this is a general commandment that doesn’t apply in every situation - the same as by secular laws; isn’t killing justified in self-defense, to punish criminals or to preemptively strike against enemies of the US of A?

YiC, DUH
Oh so that isn't something you always take to the letter eh:O guess it's nice when you can pick and choose what to follow.

And no. USA aint really allowed to preemptivly strike against enemies, they do it anyways do and come up with dumb rules so they dont get sentenced in the world court

Silly boys and girls that live by the rules they like and ignore the others Wish I had the guts to be anarchists like you guys


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Default Re: How the King James Bible saved me from anal sex! - 09-26-2011, 08:37 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by andreas.karlssson View Post
Oh so that isn't something you always take to the letter eh:O guess it's nice when you can pick and choose what to follow.
Nope, we have to follow the Bible word by word, hence we’re not allowed to kill - except if God specifically commands that, what's pretty often. You don’t know much about the Bible, do you?

Quote:
Originally Posted by andreas.karlssson View Post
And no. USA aint really allowed to preemptivly strike against enemies, they do it anyways do and come up with dumb rules so they dont get sentenced in the world court
The "world court" doesn't exist; hence the Godly US of A doesn’t need to worry about it.

On an unrelated note, the US of A accepts the UN ICJ's jurisdiction only on a case-by-case basis hence it doesn’t need to worry about this one as well.

YiC, DUH


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Default Re: How the King James Bible saved me from anal sex! - 09-27-2011, 07:12 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by andreas.karlssson View Post
Oh so that isn't something you always take to the letter eh:O guess it's nice when you can pick and choose what to follow.
We are dedicated fundamentalist Baptists. We follow 100% of God's commandments all the time. You're just using that scripture out of context.
Quote:
And no. USA aint really allowed to preemptivly strike against enemies, they do it anyways do and come up with dumb rules so they dont get sentenced in the world court
Who says they can't? God doesn't. If some French Eskimos object to what the USA does, who cares?
Quote:
Silly boys and girls that live by the rules they like and ignore the others Wish I had the guts to be anarchists like you guys
Friend, there are no anarchists here at Landover. I can promise you that.


O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.


God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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Default Re: How the King James Bible saved me from anal sex! - 10-01-2011, 12:03 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Temperance View Post
We are dedicated fundamentalist Baptists. We follow 100% of God's commandments all the time. You're just using that scripture out of context.
It weren't me that used the scripture out of context, it was a True Christian that said it was a general commandment that apparently does not always need to be followed. Again, as you seem to be a bit slow at understanding, HIS WORDS NOT MINE.

Quote:
Who says they can't? God doesn't. If some French Eskimos object to what the USA does, who cares?
K, that would mean you are breaking the law.

Quote:
Friend, there are no anarchists here at Landover. I can promise you that.
Look at what you just wrote, you just said you could break the laws if you are american. So obviously you my friend is an anarchist. Again, YOUR words, NOT MINE.

Or shouldn't I take your words literally? I mean, thats the whole point of your sect aint it, to take things literally...


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Default Re: How the King James Bible saved me from anal sex! - 10-01-2011, 06:26 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by andreas.karlssson View Post
Quote:
Quote:
And no. USA aint really allowed to preemptivly strike against enemies, they do it anyways do and come up with dumb rules so they dont get sentenced in the world court
Who says they can't? God doesn't. If some French Eskimos object to what the USA does, who cares?
K, that would mean you are breaking the law...
Can you be more specific: which law?

Which laws apply in the “world court” and what effect they have on the US of A, Andreas?


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Default Re: How the King James Bible saved me from anal sex! - 10-01-2011, 09:15 AM

Umm, all the laws apply to USA? And if you aren't knowledgeable to know what the laws are you can read up on it here. http://www.un.org/en/documents/charter/index.shtml


And yes, all of them apply to usa


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Default Re: How the King James Bible saved me from anal sex! - 10-01-2011, 12:26 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by andreas.karlssson View Post
Umm, all the laws apply to USA? And if you aren't knowledgeable to know what the laws are you can read up on it here. http://www.un.org/en/documents/charter/index.shtml


And yes, all of them apply to usa
Hasn't recent history shown you that God allows a certain amount of flexibility for the US when it comes to International Law?


Genesis 22:2 And he said, Take now thy son, thine only son Isaac, whom thou lovest, and get thee into the land of Moriah; and offer him there for a burnt offering upon one of the mountains which I will tell thee of.



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Default Re: How the King James Bible saved me from anal sex! - 10-01-2011, 03:41 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by andreas.karlssson View Post
Umm, all the laws apply to USA? And if you aren't knowledgeable to know what the laws are you can read up on it here. http://www.un.org/en/documents/charter/index.shtml

And yes, all of them apply to usa
Andreas: there isn’t any “world court”; if you incidentally have the UN International Court of Justice in mind, then the “United States accepts the court's jurisdiction only on a case-by-case basis.” That means the Godly US of A doesn’t need to care about this court, whenever its rulings don’t suit the US interests. Capiche?

Do your due diligence else you’re not even fun to play with. Seriously.


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Default Re: How the King James Bible saved me from anal sex! - 10-01-2011, 04:33 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by andreas.karlssson View Post
Umm, all the laws apply to USA? And if you aren't knowledgeable to know what the laws are you can read up on it here. http://www.un.org/en/documents/charter/index.shtml


And yes, all of them apply to usa
Uh, excuse me you Godless commie bastard, but America is God's favorite country, and we are not ruled over by a bunch of foreign scum like the fools over there in Europistan.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: How the King James Bible saved me from anal sex! - 10-05-2011, 03:31 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Temperance View Post
We are nothing like the Catholics. We believe in the Trinity of the Father, the Son and the Holy Ghost, not the trinity of the Pope, the Virgin Mary and the Death Cookie.
A straight man would have never even sat down next to a gay man. Therefore, you must be a fag.


"The Virgin Mary, being obedient to his word, received from an angel the glad tidings that she would bear God" (Against Heresies, 5:19:1 [A.D. 189]).
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Default Re: How the King James Bible saved me from anal sex! - 10-05-2011, 03:37 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Father Mihalick View Post
A straight man would have never even sat down next to a gay man. Therefore, you must be a fag.
Dear Papist Scum;

Thank you for taking the time out of your busy schedule of worshiping Jesus' mommy and raping altar boys to post this hateful message. The Holy Bible tells us that we are actually Blessed by your persecution! Thanks for proving that we're right.

Quote:
Matthew 5:10 Blessed are they which are persecuted for righteousness' sake: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
5:11 Blessed are ye, when men shall revile you, and persecute you, and shall say all manner of evil against you falsely, for my sake.
5:12 Rejoice, and be exceeding glad: for great is your reward in heaven: for so persecuted they the prophets which were before you.
Enjoy hell. I know that Jesus and I can't wait to watch you burn in hell for all eternity. Oh, how we'll laugh at you as you scream in agony! Shout Glory!!

YIC,

--Pastor Ezekiel


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: How the King James Bible saved me from anal sex! - 10-05-2011, 03:52 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Father Mihalick View Post
A straight man would have never even sat down next to a gay man. Therefore, you must be a fag.
I'm sure Brother Temperance is very hurt by your words. Not.

Because, you see, he's a Christian. How do I know this? He reads his Bible, and does what it tells him to do; unlike Catholics, who ignore the Bible, listen to Popes (not God), and pray to Mary (not Jesus).

Speaking of which, how much longer do you think you can evade my questions about your heresies?



"If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they do not want to hear." George Orwell
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Father Mihalick the Papist Polack is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Father Mihalick the Papist Polack is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Father Mihalick the Papist Polack is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Father Mihalick the Papist Polack is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Father Mihalick the Papist Polack is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: How the King James Bible saved me from anal sex! - 10-05-2011, 03:04 PM

Dear Pagan Worshiper:

You are the one who is destined for HELL!
"For false Christs and false prophets shall rise, and shall shew signs and wonders, to seduce, if it were possible, even the elect." —Mark 13:22
But don't fret, I'll say ten Hail Marys for your soul tonight.

Hail Mary, full of grace.
Our Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou among women,
and blessed is the fruit of thy womb,
Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God,
pray for us sinners,
now and at the hour of our death.
Amen.


Sincerely,

Fr. Mihalick


Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
Dear Papist Scum;

Thank you for taking the time out of your busy schedule of worshiping Jesus' mommy and raping altar boys to post this hateful message. The Holy Bible tells us that we are actually Blessed by your persecution! Thanks for proving that we're right.



Enjoy hell. I know that Jesus and I can't wait to watch you burn in hell for all eternity. Oh, how we'll laugh at you as you scream in agony! Shout Glory!!

YIC,

--Pastor Ezekiel


"The Virgin Mary, being obedient to his word, received from an angel the glad tidings that she would bear God" (Against Heresies, 5:19:1 [A.D. 189]).
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Smile Re: How the King James Bible saved me from anal sex! - 10-05-2011, 03:15 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Father Mihalick View Post

Hail Mary, full of grace.
Our Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou among women,
and blessed is the fruit of thy womb,
Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God,
pray for us sinners,
now and at the hour of our death.
Amen.

Sincerely,

Fr. Mihalick
Please, quote the verse[s] that say that Mary is holy.
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Default Re: How the King James Bible saved me from anal sex! - 10-05-2011, 03:16 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Father Mihalick View Post
*** typical Saltines© nonsense ***
Your "hell marys" spit in the face of Jesus Christ.

Happy now?



YiC,

Z. Smyth


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Default Re: How the King James Bible saved me from anal sex! - 10-05-2011, 03:57 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by no father of mine View Post
Dear Pagan Worshiper:

You are the one who is destined for HELL!
"For false Christs and false prophets shall rise, and shall shew signs and wonders, to seduce, if it were possible, even the elect." —Mark 13:22
And how did Jesus (not your "Mary" goddess, but Jesus) say that we would recognize those false prophets?

Matt. 7:15-20: Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves. Ye shall know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes of thorns, or figs of thistles? Even so every good tree bringeth forth good fruit; but a corrupt tree bringeth forth evil fruit. A good tree cannot bring forth evil fruit, neither [can] a corrupt tree bring forth good fruit. Every tree that bringeth not forth good fruit is hewn down, and cast into the fire. Wherefore by their fruits ye shall know them.

The Roman institution has brought forth evil fruit for centuries: the Inquisition, the Crusades, that sinkhole of depravity known as the Renaissance papacy, and the current scandal over black-dress-wearing boy-rapists. How, then, could anyone in his right mind think that the above passage doesn't apply to your "church"?


This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.

Questions to ask liberal "Christians"Things that the Bible doesn't sayTolerance

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