[Dr. Ernest C. Ville, D.C.S.]

Leave it to the Dutch: even when they do something right, they find a way to screw it up!

Dutch Church castrates boys to cure homosexuality

Now we here at Landover have espoused this particular brand of Jesus-approved tallywhacker modification for decades--it is nothing new. However, those backwards liberals over there in the Netherlands have long since left Jesus in the dust and moved on to deeper and darker religions.

However, we must never forget that sometimes even in the most dire circumstances Jesus can shine a light. Think Daniel in the Lions' Den, for instance. In this case, perhaps the only True Christian™ Church in the Netherlands performed several (10+) carefully supervised castrations were performed in accordance with Matthew 19:12:

Originally Posted by Matthew 19:12

12For there are some eunuchs, which were so born from their mother's womb: and there are some eunuchs, which were made eunuchs of men: and there be eunuchs, which have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake. He that is able to receive it, let him receive it.

In order to save these defenseless young boys from a life of homosexuality, this Church made the Godly decision to relieve them of their sinful parts, as Jesus Himself commanded:

Originally Posted by Matthew 5:30

30And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.

And of course who is upset but the liberal trash that infests Europe like so many rats. They are calling for trials, for investigations, calling this a scandal. Well my friends, if following Jesus is a scandal then you'd better investigate Landover Baptist, since we are guilty of just that. Leave it to the liberal elites in the Netherlands to ruin the Bible yet again. And for those of you that managed to stomach reading the article, you'll notice that all of these allegations are for anonymous men--not one single (living) person can verify these claims. Can anyone say "liberal rumor machine"??