Landover Baptist Lounge Relax, Kick your shoes off. Praise Jesus!!! (Blacks and Homosexuals strictly prohibited!) |
|
Pastor of Praise and Worship A True Christian™ Straight Shooter
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 3,891
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Being led by the Spirit.
|
|
My oldest daughter Ruth is going to handle her first snake soon. -
05-10-2011, 07:25 AM
She was Baptized last year when she was 11. I was so glad you guys could be there for that. It was really a lot of fun.
This year she will be handling her first snake. Our family has a long tradition of proving our faith through Jesus' promise given to us in Mark 16:17-18
And these signs shall follow them that believe; In my name shall they cast out devils; they shall speak with new tongues;
They shall take up serpents; and if they drink any deadly thing, it shall not hurt them; they shall lay hands on the sick, and they shall recover.
We will be sending out invitations to you all soon. I hope you guys will attend this rather controversial Christian snake handling ceremony and you will treat us kindly for being involved in it.
After the ceremony we will be going to Des Moines to lay hands upon the sick. You don't want to miss that.
In Christ,
Will
Praise and worship with Pastor Will. Services at 9 a.m., 11 a.m. and 6 p.m.
Contact me. pastorwillsampson at gmail.com
|
|
Forum Member
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 59
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Cleveland, WI
|
|
Re: My oldest daughter Ruth is going to handle her first snake so -
05-10-2011, 08:09 AM
Oh, I hope you can bring some salvation to the damned folks at the " House of Mercy" in Des Moines! They put up a facade of "mercy" while providing a women's lactation center, as if GOD Himself were unable to provide for a baby, despite Isaiah 49:15 -- "Can a woman forget her sucking child, that she should not have compassion on the son of her womb? yea, they may forget, yet will I not forget thee."
Suck away, kiddos...Pastor Sampson will provide you with the teat of truth and eternal life when he visits!
Member of Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1879 (NOT the Heretical Council of 1912!)
|
|
Friendliest Fellow in all of Freehold
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 950
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Leviticus Landing, Freehold, Iowa.
|
|
Re: My oldest daughter Ruth is going to handle her first snake so -
05-10-2011, 12:10 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor William Nathaniel Sampson
They shall take up serpents; and if they drink any deadly thing, it shall not hurt them; they shall lay hands on the sick, and they shall recover.
|
Sounds great, I can't wait! If anyone sees it as "Controversial" then they can tell GOD why they think he's wrong, can't they?
That baptism sure was memorable, you've got a beautiful little daughter Pastor and I'd love to see her handling a snake, thanks for the invitation.
Are we going to test out the "Drink any deadly thing"?.
6 A woman came up to me the other day, 12/6/2016 and said:
"But Mr. Winner, if GOD loves everyone then why is there so much suffering in the world?"
Because GOD doesn't love everyone. Too many people have this absurd idea in their heads that GOD is all loving.
If he was all loving, then murderers, thieves and homosexuals would be waiting for you in Heaven.
GOD doesn't open his gate to just anyone. Being a True Christian™ is like a Queue Jump ticket at Disney, we are guaranteed a ride with JESUS.
|
Forum Member
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 86
Join Date: Apr 2011
|
|
Re: My oldest daughter Ruth is going to handle her first snake so -
05-10-2011, 03:47 PM
Sounds brilliant! Best of wishes for your daughter, and I hope that she will grow up to be a fine, True Christian™ woman!
|
|
True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 532
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Northern Europe, land of pagans and sinners
|
|
Re: My oldest daughter Ruth is going to handle her first snake so -
05-10-2011, 04:44 PM
Fondest wishes for your daughter on such a big day. I'm sure it will be a proud moment for all and will create memories that will last a lifetime. If I wasn't 4,000 miles from Des Moines I'd take my family to the occasion. We'll be sure to get a card in the mail soon.
Daniel 5:16-18 "Let thy gifts be to thyself, and give thy rewards to another; yet I will read the writing unto the king, and make known to him the interpretation."
|
|
Ladies of Landover Senior VP One of the Truest Christians™ Ever Mama Grizzly and formerly Sister Mary Maria
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 12,662
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Standing behind my husband
|
|
Re: My oldest daughter Ruth is going to handle her first snake so -
05-10-2011, 06:24 PM
Glory!
I remember when I handled my first snake. I approached it with trepidation, expecting it to be wet and slimy like all the fish I had handled through the years, but to my surprise it was dry and amazingly muscular feeling!
Please pass on my congratulations to Ruth as I'm sure she has many years of handling snakes to look forward to.
|
|
Forum Member
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 592
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Look Behind You
|
|
Re: My oldest daughter Ruth is going to handle her first snake so -
05-10-2011, 09:13 PM
Congratulations friend. This is a testament to your and your family's faith. It is also a testimony to Him. I hope to hear good things from this.
The best way to turn a dishwasher into a snowblower. . . . .
Give her a shovel.
Proverbs 5:19 A husband's commandment! And wives must comply.
19Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love.
|
|
Honorary True Christian™
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 13,993
Join Date: May 2008
Location: North Salem, Indiana
|
|
Re: My oldest daughter Ruth is going to handle her first snake so -
05-10-2011, 11:52 PM
Brother, are you a Pennycoastal?
Bible boring? Nonsense!
Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!
|
|
True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 2,442
Join Date: Sep 2006
|
|
Re: My oldest daughter Ruth is going to handle her first snake so -
05-10-2011, 11:54 PM
Dear Friend,
Feel free to bring her to my asp-hole for practice!
Yours in Him,
BAB
|
|
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
|
|
Posts: 13
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Godless Europistan
|
|
Re: My oldest daughter Ruth is going to handle her first snake so -
06-13-2011, 12:27 AM
hey
what happens if the girl can´t do it or if the snake bites her???
|
|
Pastor of Praise and Worship A True Christian™ Straight Shooter
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 3,891
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Being led by the Spirit.
|
|
Re: My oldest daughter Ruth is going to handle her first snake so -
06-13-2011, 12:30 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Amelia Gab
hey
what happens if the girl can´t do it or if the snake bites her???
|
The Bible tells us that it won't harm her. It even says you can drink poison and it won't hurt.
Praise and worship with Pastor Will. Services at 9 a.m., 11 a.m. and 6 p.m.
Contact me. pastorwillsampson at gmail.com
|
|
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
|
|
Posts: 13
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Godless Europistan
|
|
Re: My oldest daughter Ruth is going to handle her first snake so -
06-13-2011, 12:48 AM
I know that if you drink the posion it won´t hurt you cuz of the stomach juice, it´s too acid so hardly something would pass through it. I´m a medical student in the last year of graduation.
But what if it bites the girl, you´d run into a hospital, or you´d let her die cuz she didn´t have faith enough??
what does she have to do with the snake? just hold it in her hands or what?
Just curious...
|
|
Family Man of the Year 2010-2013 About as Straight and Manly as you can get Hates anal sex. And trees.
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 8,323
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Protecting my children from homosexuals
|
|
Re: My oldest daughter Ruth is going to handle her first snake so -
06-13-2011, 02:55 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Amelia Gab
you´d let her die cuz she didn´t have faith enough??
|
He is a pastor!! Why would he interfere with God's will??
The Only Real Climate Change Will be Hell!
|
|
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
|
|
Posts: 7
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Reality...
|
|
06-13-2011, 08:43 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor William Nathaniel Sampson
She was Baptized last year when she was 11. I was so glad you guys could be there for that. It was really a lot of fun.
This year she will be handling her first snake. Our family has a long tradition of proving our faith through Jesus' promise given to us in Mark 16:17-18
And these signs shall follow them that believe; In my name shall they cast out devils; they shall speak with new tongues;
They shall take up serpents; and if they drink any deadly thing, it shall not hurt them; they shall lay hands on the sick, and they shall recover.
We will be sending out invitations to you all soon. I hope you guys will attend this rather controversial Christian snake handling ceremony and you will treat us kindly for being involved in it.
After the ceremony we will be going to Des Moines to lay hands upon the sick. You don't want to miss that.
In Christ,
Will
|
Dude that's a little dangerous for a 11 year old, I have seen a rattle snake as big as me (4'11) but I shot it in the head from a distance, I didn't walk up to it and grab it, and I don't like touching sick people either...
Posted via Mobile Device
|
|
Ladies of Landover Senior VP One of the Truest Christians™ Ever Mama Grizzly and formerly Sister Mary Maria
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 12,662
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Standing behind my husband
|
|
Re: My oldest daughter Ruth is going to handle her first snake so -
06-13-2011, 12:18 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Amelia Gab
I know that if you drink the posion [sic] it won´t hurt you cuz [sic] of the stomach juice, it´s too acid[ic] so hardly something [anything] would pass through it. I´m a medical student in the last year of graduation.
But what if it bites the girl, you´d run into [take her to] a hospital, or you´d let her die cuz [sic] she didn´t have faith enough??
[W]hat does she have to do with the snake? [J]ust hold it in her hands or what?
Just curious...
|
If this barely literate radical feminazi is an example of someone who is about to graduate medical school, thank God we only take our family to certified, proven faith healers!
Quote:
Originally Posted by EnergyofLife
Dude that's a little dangerous for a 11 year old, I have seen a rattle snake as big as me (4'11) but I shot it in the head from a distance, I didn't walk up to it and grab it, and I don't like touching sick people either...
|
I didn't know midgets were allowed to carry guns.
|
Unsaved trash
|
|
Posts: 24
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Açores - Portugal
|
|
Re: My oldest daughter Ruth is going to handle her first snake so -
06-13-2011, 01:45 PM
Hello,
Does every TC girl have to face a snake? if so, at what age??
Sister Mary, please fell free to correct my english too, it´s always good to learn!!!
YiC
Cristina
|
|
Ladies of Landover Senior VP One of the Truest Christians™ Ever Mama Grizzly and formerly Sister Mary Maria
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 12,662
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Standing behind my husband
|
|
Re: My oldest daughter Ruth is going to handle her first snake so -
06-13-2011, 04:25 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sweetgirl_dca15
Sister Mary, please fell free to correct my english too, it´s always good to learn!!!
|
We understand that many people who don't speak American as a first language are trying to change their heathen, sinful ways and so we show patience with their lack of writing ability. If we weren't so filled with the love of Christ, I'm sure we'd be a lot less tolerant.
However, people who claim to be highly educated, like that banned feminazi, are open game if their written American leaves a lot to be desired.
|
Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
|
|
Posts: 1
Join Date: Jul 2011
|
|
Re: My oldest daughter Ruth is going to handle her first snake so -
07-22-2011, 08:36 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Two-Dollar Bill
Fondest wishes for your daughter on such a big day. I'm sure it will be a proud moment for all and will create memories that will last a lifetime. If I wasn't 4,000 miles from Des Moines I'd take my family to the occasion. We'll be sure to get a card in the mail soon.
|
Beware the most venomous snake in the world!
NAME: "Expecteria Trouserius" (Trouser Snake)
HABITAT: World-wide. Usually found in bedrooms, but has been known to appear in the most unusual places.
DESCRIPTION: Varying from pale pink to black. Blind and fangless, with a highly venomous spit. Size varies from 3 to 12 inches, depending on its mood and subspecies
SYMPTOMS: This snake attacks mainly females (although a subgroup reacts only to males) in the lower front abdomen, resulting in an inconspicuous bump. Then, a severe swelling, followed by excruciating pain after nine months. The attack is not usually fatal.
ANTIDOTE: Various types of vaccines available for women. However, once the venom is injected into the body, only drastic measures will ensure complete recovery. There is no known antidote for men.
WHAT TO DO WHEN ATTACKED: TORNIQUET: Do not apply a tourniquet, as the venom is too deep in the body to be affected. CUTTING THE WOUND: This would be completely unnecessary and ineffective as the bleeding will stop after a few weeks anyhow.
SUCKING THE WOUND: This method is the most popular with the victim, but so far has not been reported to have led to any success.
MILKING THE SNAKE:
- Place 4 fingers of the right hand around the neck of the reptile, with the thumb in the front.
- Grip firmly and move the hand in an upwards and downwards motion.
- This will result in the snake becoming highly aggressive and start spitting.
- The time taken for this milking process depends entirely on the skill of the milker and the last time the snake attacked.
- Once milked, the snake should be harmless for about 20 minutes.
CONCLUSION: This snake, although very aggressive and active, is not necessarily vermin and treated with the right respect makes a wonderful pet.
|
|
God Squad
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 9,322
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: rebuking eurotrash commies
|
|
Re: My oldest daughter Ruth is going to handle her first snake so -
07-24-2011, 03:15 AM
Those Godless Hindus try to handle snakes, but look at this baby get bit!
Matthew:
5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
|
Thread Tools |
|
Display Modes |
Linear Mode
|
Posting Rules
|
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
HTML code is Off
|
|
|
Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9 Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2022 all rights reserved
|