The introduction forum Attention Unsaved Trash: This the ONLY subforum you can start threads in. Here is where you introduce yourself. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus. |
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 171
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: One Race City, USA
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Paying for pies -
08-12-2014, 09:27 PM
Through study and prayer I feel led to compensate Miss Daisy Mae for all the pies me and my darker uncouth race have stolen from her. Where can I send the certified check??
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True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 1,716
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: In the midst of His Will®
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Re: Paying for pies -
08-13-2014, 12:41 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by knob polisher
Through study and prayer I feel led to compensate Miss Daisy Mae for all the pies me and my darker uncouth race have stolen from her. Where can I send the certified check??
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Paying back Miss Daisy is a fine idea, but robbing innocent white folks at gunpoint to get the money isn't a wise choice. If you really want to make amends, I would suggest that you indenture yourself to her for several years as a menial and start chipping away at the collective debt of your race.
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
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Posts: 79,909
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Paying for pies -
08-13-2014, 12:49 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by knob polisher
Through study and prayer I feel led to compensate Miss Daisy Mae for all the pies me and my darker uncouth race have stolen from her. Where can I send the certified check??
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Contact me via my email link at the bottom of my signature. I handle all of Miss daisy's finances. Her pies don't come cheap, boy.
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 171
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: One Race City, USA
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Re: Paying for pies -
08-13-2014, 03:58 AM
How many years of servitude would it take to settle up with Miss Daisy for all the trouble negros have caused her??
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 171
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: One Race City, USA
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Re: Paying for pies -
08-13-2014, 07:32 AM
I can see why Pastor. She had the tastiest pie I ever got my mouth on.
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Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 9,980
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: San Francisco, California
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Re: Paying for pies -
08-13-2014, 07:37 AM
Oh Knobby, seeing you grow in the Lord like this, why, it's making me all emotional.
I look forward to watching you grow even more!
WARNING:
In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.
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Forum Member
Forum Member
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Posts: 708
Join Date: May 2014
Location: Pajala, Sweden
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Re: Paying for pies -
08-13-2014, 09:46 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by knob polisher
How many years of servitude would it take to settle up with Miss Daisy for all the trouble negros have caused her??
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Well, if you think negros at work...
Until the judgement day.
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 171
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: One Race City, USA
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Re: Paying for pies -
08-13-2014, 09:25 PM
I also have 1000 shares of Apple computer stock that I bought in 1984. How many shares would it take to make Miss. Daisy fairly compensated?
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Forum Member
Forum Member
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Posts: 11
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Ohio
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Re: Paying for pies -
08-13-2014, 10:03 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by knob polisher
I also have 1000 shares of Apple computer stock that I bought in 1984. How many shares would it take to make Miss. Daisy fairly compensated?
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Apple products...Heaven and sea, those things are abominations.
Though I would love to try one of Daisy Mae's pies one day. Perhaps I can swap recipes with her?
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Senior Pastor Ex-liberal; converted to True Christianity™ Always Biblically correct
True Christian™
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Posts: 10,667
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: 13706 Levite's Sojourn Terr., Gibeah Hill, Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Paying for pies -
08-13-2014, 10:44 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mckenzie
Apple products...Heaven and sea, those things are abominations.
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Indeed they are, dear friend. The Apple logo alludes to the fall of man and used to incorporate the sodomite rainbow flag. Apple is also active in the anti-heterosexuality movement.
This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.
Questions to ask liberal "Christians" ✞ Things that the Bible doesn't say ✞ Tolerance
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True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 1,716
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: In the midst of His Will®
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Re: Paying for pies -
08-14-2014, 12:22 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marko Loimaan-Aho
Well, if you think negros at work...
Until the judgement day.
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Sleeping off a belly full of ill-gotten pies, no doubt...hopefully Jesus gave him the trots.
To answer your question, knob polisher: there is no statute of limitations for the thievery of baked goods. But since you freely confess to your crimes, and are...man?...enough to take responsibility for the brazen acts of all your fellow negroes...I would think that 50 years of servitude would be fitting, but you'll have to hash out the details with her.
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 171
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: One Race City, USA
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Re: Paying for pies -
08-19-2014, 03:59 PM
I sold off the stock for $2.5 million. 10% goes to landover for tithes. What next?
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South of the Border outreach program True Christian™
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Posts: 13,142
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Godly Midwest
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Re: Paying for pies -
08-20-2014, 01:11 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by knob polisher
I sold off the stock for $2.5 million. 10% goes to landover for tithes. What next?
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Why are you trying to cheat Jesus?
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True Christian™ with a quiverful
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Posts: 2,243
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: In the kitchen
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Re: Paying for pies -
08-20-2014, 12:29 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mckenzie
Though I would love to try one of Daisy Mae's pies one day. Perhaps I can swap recipes with her?
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You'll need to get in the queue for that!
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Forum Member
Forum Member
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Posts: 708
Join Date: May 2014
Location: Pajala, Sweden
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Re: Paying for pies -
08-20-2014, 12:36 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by knob polisher
I also have 1000 shares of Apple computer stock that I bought in 1984. How many shares would it take to make Miss. Daisy fairly compensated?
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Where did you steal those 30 Benjamins, boy?
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 171
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: One Race City, USA
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Re: Paying for pies -
10-07-2014, 06:57 PM
I'm back. I got locked up for driving while black. I was in my legally owned and paid for car when the godly virginia state police pulled me over on suspicion of doing negro things.
They put me in jail for three months while they checked things out. They figured out my car was not stolen the same day and my prints didn't show anything but they kept me just cuz you know negros be up to no good.
Anyway they let me go after they got tired of feeding me.
Good to see godly cops protecting the community.
They won't give me my car back because they say it's too nice a car for a negro and might give me an uppity attitude. Would some,of you mind sending bus fair??
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Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 9,980
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: San Francisco, California
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Re: Paying for pies -
10-07-2014, 07:10 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by knob polisher
I'm back. I got locked up for driving while black. I was in my legally owned and paid for car when the godly virginia state police pulled me over on suspicion of doing negro things.
They put me in jail for three months while they checked things out. They figured out my car was not stolen the same day and my prints didn't show anything but they kept me just cuz you know negros be up to no good.
Anyway they let me go after they got tired of feeding me.
Good to see godly cops protecting the community.
They won't give me my car back because they say it's too nice a car for a negro and might give me an uppity attitude. Would some,of you mind sending bus fair??
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Sure thing, pal. Or better yet, I could swing by and pick you up and drive you straight to the nearest Baptist Church.
(I happen to be driving through Loudoun County at the moment, so this would be very convenient.)
WARNING:
In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 171
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: One Race City, USA
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Re: Paying for pies -
10-07-2014, 08:45 PM
Don't worry about it. I came across some godly men in white hoods that said they got the ride of a lifetime for me.
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Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 9,980
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: San Francisco, California
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Re: Paying for pies -
10-07-2014, 09:51 PM
Be careful. They might be queers.
WARNING:
In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.
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True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 2,290
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: In Jesus' lap
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Re: Paying for pies -
10-07-2014, 10:16 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Faith_Machine
Be careful. They might be queers.
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Or Mooslim women, or papist nuns
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