MEET CHRISTIAN SINGLES! Who knows? The love of your life might be here! All the single men are GODLY and all the single ladies are virgins...........for the most part. |
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Anvil of the Antipodes
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Does God hate the Scots? -
08-15-2008, 05:40 AM
I'm about to propose to the love of my life, a wee Scots Girl.
She has the face of an angel, and is an able housemaker .
Trouble is, I don't know much about the Scottish. Have they done anything to annoy Jesus? I'd hate to marry a Scot only to find out that Jesus hates them..
The devil, whose business is to pervert the truth, mimics the exact circumstance of the Divine Sacraments. He baptises his believers and promises forgiveness of sins...he celebrates the oblation of bread, and brings in the symbol of the resurrection. Let us therefore acknowledge the craftiness of the devil, who copied certain things of those that be divine." Tertullian (155-222 AD) from The Prescription Against Heretics' Ch XL
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Honorary True Christian™
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Location: Doing God's Work in Europistan
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Re: Does God hate the Scots? -
08-15-2008, 07:51 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Guy
I'm about to propose to the love of my life, a wee Scots Girl.
She has the face of an angel, and is an able housemaker .
Trouble is, I don't know much about the Scottish. Have they done anything to annoy Jesus? I'd hate to marry a Scot only to find out that Jesus hates them..
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Brother Guy, you were right to ask! Of course God Hates Scotland! The Scotch are nothing but a bunch of ugly, drunk, skirt-wearing, stinky people with rotten black teeth! Most of them still lived in caves, marry their sisters (or animals), and have no access to electricity or running water!
Your 'proposed love' may be hiding the fact from you that she's nothing more than an inbred cave-dwelling chain-smoking drunk, who's father's really her brother!
Please see my GOD HATES SCOTLAND Thread for more information!
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Forum Member
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Posts: 241
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Location: UK, or wherever the Lord's work takes me and my 'Long'
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Re: Does God hate the Scots? -
08-17-2008, 06:33 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Guy
I'm about to propose to the love of my life, a wee Scots Girl.
She has the face of an angel, and is an able housemaker .
Trouble is, I don't know much about the Scottish. Have they done anything to annoy Jesus? I'd hate to marry a Scot only to find out that Jesus hates them..
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With respect, I must contradict Brother Percy.
His view is a somewhat old fashioned perspective.
Before persuing my Mission as a private contractor I was fortunate enough to be an officer in Her Majesty's Armed Forces for almost thirty years. During that time I commanded many Scots, and came to know their womenfolk.
The Scots are indeed a hard, rough and ready people.
But, handled well, and given the proper example , they can become the veritable Hammer of God. I led Scots who were perhaps the most ardent in their willingness and enthusiasm to smite the Godless and the heretics we encountered on our travels in many parts of the unsaved, un-christian world.
Most Scots favour the non-papist faiths , and are thus closer to redemption than many might think.
Their women can be prone to too high a degree of almost wilful self-determination, but with patience and discipline this can be cured.
I have known many good Scots-women who well knew their place, their role, and their purpose in the greater scheme of things. Such a woman is indeed 'above Rubies'.
If your 'intended is of the wilful type you may well have a deal of work to do.
But, if you apply the correct forms of guidance, correction and re-education, she could well prove to be a wonderful and malleable help-meat.
Brother Percy's view might perhaps be based on the fact the Scots were one of the original ethnic strains that settled in the hill and mountain areas of the Americas. He is possibly confusing the ways and cultures of those areas with the life habits of the 'free-range' Scots back on their home-range.
Cave dwelling Scots are few and far between these days. Inbreeding is far less of a problem. Over the years I have commanded Scots soldiers who have been very eager to sate their appetites on whatever females were encountered in many a varied posting/deployment. At times their appetites were somewhat beyond their control, but even there, those hardy Scots did indeed deliver God's judgement upon many an uncooperative heathen, and in fact, enacted God's punishment for those womens' wicked and Godless ways.
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Deaconess Gracious, genteel, kind, tender, and warm True Christian™ Sister
True Christian™
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Posts: 15,215
Join Date: Jan 1970
Location: God's Own America
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Re: Does God hate the Scots? -
08-17-2008, 08:56 AM
Scottish men wear Skirts.
Don't their Women prefer American True Christian™ real men who dress as the Lord Commands?
These limp-wristed Scots are OBVIOUSLY Homers
Look at the way his bottom is being admired.
Sister Talitha
Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.
HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41
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Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance Christ's Rottweiler
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Posts: 22,742
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Re: Does God hate the Scots? -
08-17-2008, 09:34 AM
Dr Johnson once said, and I think him correct, "Much may be made of a Scotchman, if he be caught young." and this applies to of the female of the species.
Despite speaking an unintelligible variant of American, you will be delighted at the frugal nature of a Scotchwoman, who might make the most nutritious soup out of peat and old clothes. This frugality has its drawbacks though; her grip on money is fierce and it takes a strong man much effort to prise open a Scotchwoman’s fist that is tightly closed around a small coin.”
(I am reminded of an old aphorism,
Q: “What is the difference between a Scotchman and a coconut?”
A: “You can get a drink out of a coconut.”)
Beware though, many are Ginger and most importantly, never, ever, feed a Scotchperson whiskey after midnight! Even the stoutest chains will be insufficient to restrain him or her.
All in all, I wish you well, it is a brave (some might say foolhardy) thing you do but ultimately it will be rewarding as she grows tame and used to human company.
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Unsaved Trash uppity feminazi God-mocker
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Location: UK
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Re: Does God hate the Scots? -
08-17-2008, 06:01 PM
Oh deary me!
First of it is NOT a skirt it is caled a KILT!!
Secondly its not Scotch its Scottish or Scots!
Scotch as you will know is whisky or in the USA I think it is burbon or however its spelt!
Can I just ask why there are millions of Scottish Christians and ministers, pastors etc if Jesus hates them ?
Just curious...
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Deaconess Gracious, genteel, kind, tender, and warm True Christian™ Sister
True Christian™
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Posts: 15,215
Join Date: Jan 1970
Location: God's Own America
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Re: Does God hate the Scots? -
08-17-2008, 06:05 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by krusty
Oh deary me!
First of it is NOT a skirt it is caled a KILT!!
Secondly its not Scotch its Scottish or Scots!
Scotch as you will know is whisky or in the USA I think it is burbon or however its spelt!
Can I just ask why there are millions of Scottish Christians and ministers, pastors etc if Jesus hates them ?
Just curious...
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Not too bright are we?
They are, of course, False Christians.
It's only the True Christian™ Pastors we have here who are real.
Sister Talitha
Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.
HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41
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Municipal Code Archivist - Deuteronomy 28:58 Christ's Guardian
True Christian™
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Posts: 23,743
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Mostly on the front porch.
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Re: Does God hate the Scots? -
08-17-2008, 06:22 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by krusty
I think it is burbon or however its spelt!
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Spelt- www.spelt.com
May you be a blessing to every life you touch.
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Anvil of the Antipodes
True Christian™
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Posts: 1,269
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Re: Does God hate the Scots? -
08-17-2008, 09:29 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother_Percy
Brother Guy, you were right to ask! Of course God Hates Scotland! The Scotch are nothing but a bunch of ugly, drunk, skirt-wearing, stinky people with rotten black teeth! Most of them still lived in caves, marry their sisters (or animals), and have no access to electricity or running water!
Your 'proposed love' may be hiding the fact from you that she's nothing more than an inbred cave-dwelling chain-smoking drunk, who's father's really her brother!
Please see my GOD HATES SCOTLAND Thread for more information!
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Dearest Brother Percy. Thankyou for your assistance. I have annulled the engagement on the grounds that she is probably impure and will likely produce hairy retard babies with anyone foolish enough to attempt to engage in a drunken naked 'sword dance'.
I have reported her presence to the authorities and expect her to be deported anytime within the next month.
I will keep on looking for my perfect bride but I often despair of success.
Please pray for me
The devil, whose business is to pervert the truth, mimics the exact circumstance of the Divine Sacraments. He baptises his believers and promises forgiveness of sins...he celebrates the oblation of bread, and brings in the symbol of the resurrection. Let us therefore acknowledge the craftiness of the devil, who copied certain things of those that be divine." Tertullian (155-222 AD) from The Prescription Against Heretics' Ch XL
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Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
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Posts: 1
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Re: Does God hate the Scots? -
08-18-2008, 12:10 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother_Percy
Brother Guy, you were right to ask! Of course God Hates Scotland! The Scotch are nothing but a bunch of ugly, drunk, skirt-wearing, stinky people with rotten black teeth! Most of them still lived in caves, marry their sisters (or animals), and have no access to electricity or running water!
Your 'proposed love' may be hiding the fact from you that she's nothing more than an inbred cave-dwelling chain-smoking drunk, who's father's really her brother!
Please see my GOD HATES SCOTLAND Thread for more information!
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Americans are the worst of all I hopw god smites them down. They ahve the highest gay population and they need to be gone.
Good luck with you wife my friend.
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True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 212
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Canada.
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Re: Does God hate the Scots? -
08-18-2008, 01:26 AM
Well, I am part scottish..
So I'd say God only hates MOST scots.
But so long as you get them young.. Well, they can be normal.
Repent, or be tortured in nasty ways with sharp, pointy things!
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Forum Member
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Posts: 241
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: UK, or wherever the Lord's work takes me and my 'Long'
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Re: Does God hate the Scots? -
08-19-2008, 09:52 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cheshire
Well, I am part scottish..
So I'd say God only hates MOST scots.
But so long as you get them young.. Well, they can be normal.
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You're right Miss Cheshire...
Like many wild and Godless creatures they can with hard work and abiding faith be redeemed and brought to the true path.
There are times we must all see past what seems hopeless and strive all the harder in God's name simply for the fact we have tasted defeat.
It is that taste of failure's sorrow that must lift us up and cause us to struggle harder in God's hope.
Too many people think the days of the Crusade are gone.
Hardship , challenge , and powerful foes are all our allies in God's work.
They temper us as water tempers steel,
arming us in the War of faith we all know is being fought all around us.
2 Chronicles 30:9
For if ye turn again unto the LORD, your brethren and your children shall find compassion before them that lead them captive, so that they shall come again into this land: for the LORD your God is gracious and merciful, and will not turn away his face from you, if ye return unto him.
we must strive , always , to return lost souls to the Lord, whether they want to or not. They can be taught to want redemption .
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Unsaved Trash uppity feminazi God-mocker
Under Investigation
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Re: Does God hate the Scots? -
08-19-2008, 09:20 PM
I WANT TO KNOW WHO YOUR GOD IS ?
COZ I KNOW THE GOD THAT I WORSHIP N GAVE MY HEART TO LOVES EVERYONE .............EVEN THE ONES THAT DONT KNOW HIM PERSONALY ...... HAVE YOU NEVER LISTENED TO THE WORDS OF THE SONG YES JESUS LOVES ME ? HMMMMMMMMMMMMM NO I DIDNT THINK SO ................... NO MATTER THE COLOUR OF YOUR SKIN OR WHERE YOU COME FROM JESUS LOVES US ALL ..............AND IF JESUS ONLY LOVES CERTAIN PEOPLE THAN WHY IN THE BIBLE DOES IT SAY JESUS DIED FOR ALL OUR SINS ? YOU DO KNOW THAT IF THIS CULT GOES ON YOU WILL EACH AND EVERY ONE STAND TO BE JUDGED ON JUDGMENT DAY !!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Unsaved Trash uppity feminazi God-mocker
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Posts: 22
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Location: UK
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Re: Does God hate the Scots? -
08-19-2008, 09:24 PM
YES JESUS LOVES ME
YES JESUS LOVES ME
YES JESUS LOVES ME
THE BIBLE TELLS ME SO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
WORDS OF THE SONG I ASKED DOES ANYONE KNOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!
P.S JESUS DIDN'T JUST DIE ON THE CROSS FOR AMERICANS AND THEIR SINS IT WAS WORLD WIDE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Landover Security Superviser Asset Loss Prevention and Personal Security Expert NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
True Christian™
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Posts: 18,554
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold Iowa
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Re: Does God hate the Scots? -
08-19-2008, 09:35 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by krusty
YES JESUS LOVES ME
YES JESUS LOVES ME
YES JESUS LOVES ME
THE BIBLE TELLS ME SO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
WORDS OF THE SONG I ASKED DOES ANYONE KNOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!
P.S JESUS DIDN'T JUST DIE ON THE CROSS FOR AMERICANS AND THEIR SINS IT WAS WORLD WIDE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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True, but it is quite clear that we TRUE Christians™ Americans (Republican, Baptists) are loved the most by Christ. After all Jesus has blessed us with the richest, more powerful country ever to exist on earth. As for Scotsmen, well what can we say about a country were sheep guts is the national dish?
Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.
Hot Must ReadThreads!
Time to come clean on Benghazi Mr Obama!
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True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 1,024
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Where Jesus Wants Me
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Re: Does God hate the Scots? -
08-19-2008, 09:38 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by krusty
YES JESUS LOVES ME
YES JESUS LOVES ME
YES JESUS LOVES ME
THE BIBLE TELLS ME SO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
WORDS OF THE SONG I ASKED DOES ANYONE KNOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!
P.S JESUS DIDN'T JUST DIE ON THE CROSS FOR AMERICANS AND THEIR SINS IT WAS WORLD WIDE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Can you please point out that song in the KJV Bible.... If it is not in there I really do not care to hear it.
Yes God is full of love, but God is also full of anger and rage for sodomites, catholics, and anyone else who does not follow His word.
Gather around so that I can read to you from my book of TRUTH. Genesis thru Revelations....Pick one!
Luke 12:5- But I will forewarn you whom ye shall fear: Fear him, which after he hath killed hath power to cast into hell; yea, I say unto you, Fear him.
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Unsaved Trash uppity feminazi God-mocker
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Re: Does God hate the Scots? -
08-19-2008, 09:53 PM
YEAH YEAH
AND I LIKE HOW YOU LOT HAVE ALL IGNORED MY COMMENT ABOUT THIS BEING A CULT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
LISTEN TO THIS THEN
WHO SENT OUR BRITISH SOLDIERS TO WAR FOR OIL NOT USA ANYWAY YOU ALL SIT ON YOUR ARSE AND GET EVERYONE ELSE TO DO THE HARD WORK C'MON YOU GET BETWEEN $25000 - $50000 GOV GRANT!!!!!!!!!! AND WHO GIVES YOU ALL THIS CASH US BRITS THATS WHO!!! WE ALL SLAVE OUR GUTS OUT FOR YOU'S TO HAVE A SIMPLE LIFE N WHAT DO WE GET IN RETURN ?
BLOOD SHED AND TEARS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
GOD DID NOT WANT ANY ANAMOSITY HE CREATED THIS WORLD ,,,,, MAN AND WOMAN TO GET ON IN HARMONY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! READ THE COMMANDMENTS I THINK YOU WILL FIND THERE IS 10 OF THEM
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Landover Security Superviser Asset Loss Prevention and Personal Security Expert NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
True Christian™
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Posts: 18,554
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold Iowa
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Re: Does God hate the Scots? -
08-19-2008, 10:00 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by krusty
YEAH YEAH
AND I LIKE HOW YOU LOT HAVE ALL IGNORED MY COMMENT ABOUT THIS BEING A CULT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Don't be silly. Pastor Zeke has said numerous times Landover is not a cult. I would think Pastor Zeke would know best on this.
Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.
Hot Must ReadThreads!
Time to come clean on Benghazi Mr Obama!
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Honorary True Christian™
Forum Member
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Posts: 13,993
Join Date: May 2008
Location: North Salem, Indiana
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Re: Does God hate the Scots? -
08-19-2008, 10:06 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Guy
Dearest Brother Percy. Thankyou for your assistance. I have annulled the engagement on the grounds that she is probably impure and will likely produce hairy retard babies with anyone foolish enough to attempt to engage in a drunken naked 'sword dance'.
I have reported her presence to the authorities and expect her to be deported anytime within the next month.
I will keep on looking for my perfect bride but I often despair of success.
Please pray for me
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Brother Guy, I suggest you see if she can be Saved© before dispensing with her. Perhaps a Pastor can help?
Quote:
Originally Posted by krusty
I WANT TO KNOW WHO YOUR GOD IS ?
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The one in the Bible, not the one you made up.
Quote:
COZ I KNOW THE GOD THAT I WORSHIP N GAVE MY HEART TO LOVES EVERYONE
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Does your "god" keep your heart on a jar on his desk? Or did he eat it? And what moves your blood around now?
Quote:
HAVE YOU NEVER LISTENED TO THE WORDS OF THE SONG YES JESUS LOVES ME ?
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Sure. It's one of those ridiculous hippie love god songs which has nothing to do with the Bible.
Quote:
IF JESUS ONLY LOVES CERTAIN PEOPLE THAN WHY IN THE BIBLE DOES IT SAY JESUS DIED FOR ALL OUR SINS ?
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Chapter and verse, please.
Jesus died ONLY for those who BELIEVE. And those who BELIEVE must REPENT of ALL SIN.
Quote:
Originally Posted by John 3:16
For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.
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Repenting of ALL sin means not committing ANY sin. That means following EVERY SINGLE COMMAND of GOD. There are over 600, not TEN!
Quote:
Originally Posted by James 2:10
For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by krusty
YES JESUS LOVES ME
YES JESUS LOVES ME
YES JESUS LOVES ME
THE BIBLE TELLS ME SO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
WORDS OF THE SONG I ASKED DOES ANYONE KNOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!
P.S JESUS DIDN'T JUST DIE ON THE CROSS FOR AMERICANS AND THEIR SINS IT WAS WORLD WIDE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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See above, you delusional twit.
Quote:
Originally Posted by krusty
WHO SENT OUR BRITISH SOLDIERS TO WAR FOR OIL NOT USA ANYWAY
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Um, the US forces are just about the only ones left in Iraq, dimwit. Read a newspaper sometime.
Quote:
YOU ALL SIT ON YOUR ARSE AND GET EVERYONE ELSE TO DO THE HARD WORK C'MON YOU GET BETWEEN $25000 - $50000 GOV GRANT!!!!!!!!!!
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WHA? What ARE you yammering about?
Bible boring? Nonsense!
Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!
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Senior Usher True Christian™ missionary to the Unsaved Kingdom A very nice young man
True Christian™
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Posts: 15,647
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: South Yorkshire, hotbed of sin
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Re: Does God hate the Scots? -
08-19-2008, 10:14 PM
Basically, the Scots are like the Irish, only white.
Quote:
Originally Posted by TomtheJew
Americans are the worst of all I hopw god smites them down. They ahve the highest gay population and they need to be gone.
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Yet more hateful Jew bigotry. How long can we tolerate these Hebrews and their crazed prejudice against normal people?
Quote:
Originally Posted by krusty
I WANT TO KNOW WHO YOUR GOD IS ?
COZ I KNOW THE GOD THAT I WORSHIP N GAVE MY HEART TO LOVES EVERYONE .............EVEN THE ONES THAT DONT KNOW HIM PERSONALY
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If your God loves you that much, why won't He tell you how to turn caps lock off?
O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.
God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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