Landover to the Rescue - Christian Help Forum A Christian Help Forum led by Sister Daisy Mae Johnson. Warning! Sometimes the Lord's advice is a hard pill to swallow. |
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Linguistics and Translation Consultant
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Is DYSLEXIA a curse from God or is it CURABLE? -
12-22-2010, 11:10 AM
Regarding my (Spanish) niece. she's been 'diagnosed' as dyslexic. Again, one might think I shouldn't be worrying since she's being brought up Cathleck by agnostic parents. (my point exactly! They just want her to have the big first communion party like all her 'amigas'. Sickening.)
Anyway, since I have experience in teaching and linguistics, they've asked me to help. The first session was of course disastrous. There's no language barrier of course since I am totally fluent in Spanish. The problem is that her level of English is amoebic and is therefore unable to read my KJV1611.
I though of a translation version but have decided to abandon the project altogether. I will no longer be trying to help her, in English or Spanish or even in Sapnihs, which she seemsm to be able to raed hte best. In any case it's juts not wroth it.
HOWEVER, I'm left with a sort of dilemma.
Is her DYSLEXIA something that should/can/might be remedied?
Or did God give her this for a reason?
And if so, has she any hope of Salvation? (or even Slatavion)
All comments welcome, thank you.
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True Christian™
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Location: On a Divine Quest in Dunghole Denmarkistan
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Re: Is DYSLEXIA a curse from God or is it CURABLE? -
12-22-2010, 12:14 PM
Well, it is obviously God who has cursed her with dylexia:
Exodus 4:11
And the LORD said unto him, Who hath made man's mouth? or who maketh the dumb, or deaf, or the seeing, or the blind? have not I the LORD?
God is probably punishing the parents of you niece for being agnostics since he doesn't like agnostics at all:
Revelation 3:16
So then because thou art lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will spue thee out of my mouth
Since you are a True Christian™ you could cure her with prayer:
Matthew 21:22
And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive
But perhaps refraining from doing so could serve as a lesson to her ungodly parents?
To the atheists:
To the false christians:
Feel like pissing off God? Perhaps this will change your mind:
Hosea 13:16 Samaria shall become desolate; for she hath rebelled against her God: they shall fall by the sword: their infants shall be dashed in pieces, and their women with child shall be ripped up.
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Linguistics and Translation Consultant
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Re: Is DYSLEXIA a curse from God or is it CURABLE? -
12-22-2010, 12:34 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Johannes Kirkeholm
Well, it is obviously God who has cursed her with dylexia:
Exodus 4:11
And the LORD said unto him, Who hath made man's mouth? or who maketh the dumb, or deaf, or the seeing, or the blind? have not I the LORD?
God is probably punishing the parents of you niece for being agnostics since he doesn't like agnostics at all:
Revelation 3:16
So then because thou art lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will spue thee out of my mouth
Since you are a True Christian™ you could cure her with prayer:
Matthew 21:22
And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive
But perhaps refraining from doing so could serve as a lesson to her ungodly parents?
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Thank you kindly my wise Scandinavian brother (Tack sa mycket - sorry that's Swedish I know).
I liked especially your third piece of advice. It also fits in better with my Christmas schedule and the skiing trip.
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Proud to be Blonde, Beautiful, and Baptist
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Re: Is DYSLEXIA a curse from God or is it CURABLE? -
12-22-2010, 01:32 PM
I think it would be best if she stopped learning any of those foreign languages and learn to speak American only. Throw away anything that is not written in American and only play American DVD's
Also it has been proven that dyslexia is just an excuse for lazy people not to read.
Genesis 1:1 In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth
Proverbs 19:25 Smite a scorner, and the simple will beware: and reprove one that hath understanding, and he will understand knowledge.
Ezekiel 16:14 And thy renown went forth among the heathen for thy beauty: for it was perfect through my comeliness, which I had put upon thee, saith the Lord GOD.
Proverbs 6:25 Lust not after her beauty in thine heart; neither let her take thee with her eyelids.
Genesis 24:16 And the damsel was very fair to look upon, a virgin, neither had any man known her: and she went down to the well, and filled her pitcher, and came up.
Song of Solomon 1:15 Behold, thou art fair, my love; behold, thou art fair; thou hast doves' eyes.
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The Sermonator
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Re: Is DYSLEXIA a curse from God or is it CURABLE? -
12-22-2010, 01:34 PM
It's a lifestyle choice just like homerism, Gingerism and negraism.
If they were to repent of their evil ways and turn to Jesus for their Salvation we wouldn't have to suffer their nonsense.
JUDGEMENT DAY
"I'll Be Back!!"
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Petite pearl of Baptist womanhood
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Location: Woodlawn Drive, Freehold, USA USA USA
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Re: Is DYSLEXIA a curse from God or is it CURABLE? -
12-23-2010, 03:51 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lisa H
Also it has been proven that dyslexia is just an excuse for lazy people not to read.
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They can also do it to get attention.
PS: Is Dyslexia one of the things you can stand up in church and reveal about someone when the reverend asks "if there's anyone present who knows any reason why this couple should not be married" and such-and-such?
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Proud to be Blonde, Beautiful, and Baptist
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Re: Is DYSLEXIA a curse from God or is it CURABLE? -
12-23-2010, 08:28 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mistress Cookie
Is Dyslexia one of the things you can stand up in church and reveal about someone when the reverend asks "if there's anyone present who knows any reason why this couple should not be married" and such-and-such?
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I would think it would count. A True Christian should not be marrying someone who is not worthy and unwilling to abide by God.
Genesis 1:1 In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth
Proverbs 19:25 Smite a scorner, and the simple will beware: and reprove one that hath understanding, and he will understand knowledge.
Ezekiel 16:14 And thy renown went forth among the heathen for thy beauty: for it was perfect through my comeliness, which I had put upon thee, saith the Lord GOD.
Proverbs 6:25 Lust not after her beauty in thine heart; neither let her take thee with her eyelids.
Genesis 24:16 And the damsel was very fair to look upon, a virgin, neither had any man known her: and she went down to the well, and filled her pitcher, and came up.
Song of Solomon 1:15 Behold, thou art fair, my love; behold, thou art fair; thou hast doves' eyes.
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Senior Usher True Christian™ missionary to the Unsaved Kingdom A very nice young man
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Location: South Yorkshire, hotbed of sin
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Re: Is DYSLEXIA a curse from God or is it CURABLE? -
12-22-2010, 01:43 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Johannes Kirkeholm
Since you are a True Christian™ you could cure her with prayer:
Matthew 21:22
And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive
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I'd recommend this option. As a True Christian, I am 100% confident that prayer works, and so when your prayers inevitably cure this girl, it will serve as an excellent demonstration of God's powers to this girl's wishy-washy parents.
O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.
God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
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Re: Is DYSLEXIA a curse from God or is it CURABLE? -
12-22-2010, 02:56 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Temperance
I'd recommend this option. As a True Christian, I am 100% confident that prayer works, and so when your prayers inevitably cure this girl, it will serve as an excellent demonstration of God's powers to this girl's wishy-washy parents.
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Ditto that. Prayer is the only known cure for the retardation that your niece has. It could be that Jesus is punishing her for being a garlic-eating greasy spanish dago wop bastard, but I'd have to meet her to be sure.
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
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Linguistics and Translation Consultant
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Re: Is DYSLEXIA a curse from God or is it CURABLE? -
12-22-2010, 03:06 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel
Ditto that. Prayer is the only known cure for the retardation that your niece has. It could be that Jesus is punishing her for being a garlic-eating greasy spanish dago wop bastard, but I'd have to meet her to be sure.
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Perhaps Pastor. Just as God punished my own cousin with schizophrenia for being a skirt-wearing, haggis-hurling, drunken-rambling, sheep-molesting, false-Baptist, ex-Jehovah's witness, deep-fried pizza eating, Yank-hating, heather-sniffing, soccerball-sucking heretic retard too. So I suppose the reason He has done this is understandable.
Thank you Pastor, I shall forthwith take nothing more to do with the child. Except if her father is organizing the deer-hunting trip in the early new year. I shall be courteous, nothing more. Thank you and God Bless.
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Head Attorney of Landover's Legal Team The Most Honest Lawyer in America
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Re: Is DYSLEXIA a curse from God or is it CURABLE? -
12-22-2010, 03:13 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lost Sheep McUinnean
Just as God punished my own cousin with schizophrenia for being a skirt-wearing, haggis-hurling, drunken-rambling, sheep-molesting, false-Baptist, ex-Jehovah's witness, deep-fried pizza eating, Yank-hating, heather-sniffing, soccerball-sucking heretic retard too.
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I didn't know your cousin was mexican. You learn something new every day.
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Petite pearl of Baptist womanhood
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Re: Is DYSLEXIA a curse from God or is it CURABLE? -
12-23-2010, 05:02 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lost Sheep McUinnean
Is her DYSLEXIA something that should/can/might be remedied?
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I did some searching for you and it looks like you have some affordable, do-it-yourself options!
Quote:
The knowledge that head trauma, convulsions and high fever could be good for improving mental disturbances is not new in Medicine. Hippocrates was the first to note that malaria-induced convulsions in insane patients was able to cure them. In the Middle Ages, some physicians observed the same phenomenon after a severe bout of fever; such as after cholera epidemics in insane asylums. In 1786, a physician named Roess claimed improvement in mental patients after inocculation with smallpox vaccine. Furthermore, many physicans along the centuries have noted that there are very few epileptics who are also schizophrenic, and a biological theory on the incompatibility of convulsions and mental disease slowly evolved. In addition, for centuries physicians had been fascinated with the idea of treating mental and neurological diseases by using electricity.
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