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The Poetaster's Korner Tasteful poetry for JESUS but don't let the flowers fool you. NO HOMERS ALLOWED!

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Default Re: Put your fave or new Pithy Christian Sayings here - 03-12-2008, 03:24 PM

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Originally Posted by Dances with Joy View Post
This is my flag, bubba.
Sister, you could walk into heaven dripped in the blood of innocents wearing that flag. Jesus understands what we do.
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Default Re: Put your fave or new Pithy Christian Sayings here - 03-12-2008, 03:36 PM

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Originally Posted by Deaner View Post
Sister, you could walk into heaven dripped in the blood of innocents wearing that flag. Jesus understands what we do.

I wouldn't want to spend eternity with someone who would accept people "dripped in the blood of innocents" just because they were waving a flag.


Now that Obama has won the election there will be big black cock for every white woman!!!
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Default Re: Put your fave or new Pithy Christian Sayings here - 03-12-2008, 03:42 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dances with Joy View Post
I wouldn't want to spend eternity with someone who would accept people "dripped in the blood of innocents" just because they were waving a flag.
Then you'll be ass-raped by demons for eternity. Simple isn't it?
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Default Re: Put your fave or new Pithy Christian Sayings here - 03-12-2008, 03:45 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Deaner View Post
Then you'll be ass-raped by demons for eternity. Simple isn't it?

Even if I believed your book, there's nothing in it about being raped by demons in hell.


Now that Obama has won the election there will be big black cock for every white woman!!!
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Default Re: Put your fave or new Pithy Christian Sayings here - 03-12-2008, 03:50 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dances with Joy View Post
Even if I believed your book, there's nothing in it about being raped by demons in hell.
What about "weeping and gnashing" of teeth? If that's not referring to ass-rape I don't know what is.
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Default Re: Put your fave or new Pithy Christian Sayings here - 03-12-2008, 03:52 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Deaner View Post
What about "weeping and gnashing" of teeth? If that's not referring to ass-rape I don't know what is.

Weeping and gnashing of teeth simply indicate mourning - not rape.


Now that Obama has won the election there will be big black cock for every white woman!!!
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Default Re: Put your fave or new Pithy Christian Sayings here - 03-12-2008, 04:02 PM

On a gravestone:

Remember Man as you go by,
As you are now so once was I.
As I am now so shall you be,
Prepare yourself to follow me.


Simply inspiring…





“We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

Author of such illuminating essays as,
Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.
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Default Re: Put your fave or new Pithy Christian Sayings here - 03-12-2008, 04:04 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dances with Joy View Post
Weeping and gnashing of teeth simply indicate mourning - not rape.
Sitting in a corner being sad is mourning. Crying your eyes out and grinding your teeth into mush means there's a demon in your backside. Is that all you think goes on in hell; people sitting around feeling blue?
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Default Re: Put your fave or new Pithy Christian Sayings here - 03-12-2008, 04:05 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Deaner View Post
Sitting in a corner being sad is mourning. Crying your eyes out and grinding your teeth into mush means there's a demon in your backside. Is that all you think goes on in hell; people sitting around feeling blue?

I don't think anything goes on in hell because I don't believe such a place exists.


Now that Obama has won the election there will be big black cock for every white woman!!!
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Default Re: Put your fave or new Pithy Christian Sayings here - 03-12-2008, 04:12 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dances with Joy View Post
I don't think anything goes on in hell because I don't believe such a place exists.
Yes, correct. And that's where the arguement lies.

Now I think even you'd agree that if there was a hell, the worst possible place you could imagine, that ass-rape would be a very real possibility?
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Default Re: Put your fave or new Pithy Christian Sayings here - 03-12-2008, 04:14 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Deaner View Post
Yes, correct. And that's where the arguement lies.

Now I think even you'd agree, that if there was a hell, the worst possible place you could imagine; that ass-rape would be a very real possibility?

And if frogs had wings, it would be a very real possibility that they wouldn't bump their asses on the ground.

But frogs don't have wings, and hell doesn't exist.


Now that Obama has won the election there will be big black cock for every white woman!!!
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Default Re: Put your fave or new Pithy Christian Sayings here - 03-12-2008, 04:19 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dances with Joy View Post
But frogs don't have wings, and hell doesn't exist.
We can all quite plainly see that frog's don't have wings. But do you think a demon is a stupid frog?? They can make themselves invisible you know.
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Default Re: Put your fave or new Pithy Christian Sayings here - 03-18-2008, 06:52 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dances without Joy View Post
I don't think anything goes on in hell because I don't believe such a place exists.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dances without Joy View Post
And if frogs had wings, it would be a very real possibility that they wouldn't bump their asses on the ground.

But frogs don't have wings, and hell doesn't exist.
You've gone pretty quickly from "I don't believe such a place exists" to "hell doesn't exist." Just because you don't believe that something exists, that doesn't mean that it doesn't exist. For example, I didn't believe that such cesspools of liberal depravity as Decorah could be found anywhere, let alone in Iowa, but sure enough, they exist. Now, would you care to prove that hell doesn't exist?


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Default Re: Put your fave or new Pithy Christian Sayings here - 03-18-2008, 07:52 PM

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Originally Posted by Pastor Isaac Peters View Post
You've gone pretty quickly from "I don't believe such a place exists" to "hell doesn't exist." Just because you don't believe that something exists, that doesn't mean that it doesn't exist. For example, I didn't believe that such cesspools of liberal depravity as Decorah could be found anywhere, let alone in Iowa, but sure enough, they exist. Now, would you care to prove that hell doesn't exist?
I can't prove that it doesn't exist, and you can't prove that it does - stalemate.


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Default Re: Put your fave or new Pithy Christian Sayings here - 03-18-2008, 08:03 PM

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Originally Posted by Dances without Joy View Post
I can't prove that it doesn't exist, and you can't prove that it does - stalemate.
Backpedal much?

Also, I can prove that it exists. The Bible says repeatedly that it does, and the Bible is inspired by God.


This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.

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Default Re: Put your fave or new Pithy Christian Sayings here - 03-18-2008, 08:17 PM

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Originally Posted by Pastor Isaac Peters View Post
Backpedal much?

Also, I can prove that it exists. The Bible says repeatedly that it does, and the Bible is inspired by God.

The Bible isn't proof of anything - it's an anthology of fractured stories edited and compiled several decades after Jesus supposedly lived and died.
The fact that Dr. Suess wrote a book that said "The Star-bellied Sneeches played on the beaches." does not mean that there actually exists somewhere a beach filled with frolicking Sneeches.


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Default Re: Put your fave or new Pithy Christian Sayings here - 03-18-2008, 09:11 PM

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Originally Posted by Dances without Joy View Post
"The Star-bellied Sneeches played on the beaches." does not mean that there actually exists somewhere a beach filled with frolicking Sneeches.
I bet there's a lot worse than Sneeches crawling around your neighbourhood. You're probably in one of those subdivisions selling crack through car windows.
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Default Re: Put your fave or new Pithy Christian Sayings here - 03-19-2008, 12:53 AM

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Originally Posted by Deaner View Post
Yes, correct. And that's where the arguement lies.

Now I think even you'd agree that if there was a hell, the worst possible place you could imagine, that ass-rape would be a very real possibility?
I think there's a real difference in attitudes here. To a decent, godfearing Christian like you, being anally violated by over 30 of Satan's servants doubtless sounds like a strange and horrific experience; on the other hand, to a harlot like Dances, it sounds like a fairly standard Thursday afternoon.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Deaner View Post
We can all quite plainly see that frog's don't have wings. But do you think a demon is a stupid frog?
Well, Sartre did famously say that Hell was other French people...
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Originally Posted by Dances without Joy View Post
I can't prove that it doesn't exist, and you can't prove that it does - stalemate.
Jesus will break that stalemate when He chucks you into Hell.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dances without Joy View Post
The Bible isn't proof of anything - it's an anthology of fractured stories edited and compiled several decades after Jesus supposedly lived and died.
The fact that Dr. Suess wrote a book that said "The Star-bellied Sneeches played on the beaches." does not mean that there actually exists somewhere a beach filled with frolicking Sneeches.
If there was such a beach, doubtless your secularist doctrine of "natural selection" would require you to round up all the Sneeches without stars and take them away to be gassed.


O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.


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Default Re: Put your fave or new Pithy Christian Sayings here - 03-19-2008, 02:16 PM

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Originally Posted by Brother Temperance View Post
I think there's a real difference in attitudes here. To a decent, godfearing Christian like you, being anally violated by over 30 of Satan's servants doubtless sounds like a strange and horrific experience; on the other hand, to a harlot like Dances, it sounds like a fairly standard Thursday afternoon.

Nah, I save the kinky stuff for special occasions.

Well, Sartre did famously say that Hell was other French people...

Actually, he said it was other people - he didn't specify a nationality.

Jesus will break that stalemate when He chucks you into Hell.

He might if it weren't for the fact that he's long dead and Hell doesn't exist.

If there was such a beach, doubtless your secularist doctrine of "natural selection" would require you to round up all the Sneeches without stars and take them away to be gassed.
Do you even know what the moral of the story of "The Sneeches" is? It's twofold: 1 - Be happy with who you are. 2 - No one is better than anyone else simpyl because of what they have or don't have.


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Default Re: Put your fave or new Pithy Christian Sayings here - 03-26-2008, 04:33 PM

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And if frogs had wings, it would be a very real possibility that they wouldn't bump their asses on the ground.

But frogs don't have wings, and hell doesn't exist.
I was reading this thread with great interest until this tramp starting going off sexually about all this hot, wild, gyrating rear end bumping that frogs do. I assume this would be after they find themselves in hell.

It also seems foolish to say that hell does not exist in the same sentence as frogs. Did not Moses call forth multitudes of frogs against Pharaoh and everyone knows Pharaoh is burning in hell as we speak. I can only assume that the frogs went with him, arse bumping all the way. See Exodus 7.25-8.6 if thou knowest not the story by heart like us True Christians™


Isaiah 36.12 - But Rabshakeh said, Hath my master sent me to thy master and to thee to speak these words? hath he not sent me to the men that sit upon the wall, that they may eat their own dung, and drink their own piss with you?
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