HALLOWEEN = HELLOWEEN A seasonal forum to NOT celebrate Satan's birthday. |
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Gushing for Jesus
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Posts: 23,743
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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2017 Witch Hunt! -
10-05-2017, 08:25 PM
Woot!!!
Gentlemen and pastors, get thee ready for another great year of WITCH HUNTING!
For the sake of the new folks, here are the rules:
1. To prove a kill you must submit genitals, teeth, ears or fingers or toes to the Pastors if you cannot bring in the entire body.
2. Severely maiming will get you points, but it's not as good as a kill.
3. Because of ISIS and unwanted immigration we are now allowing Terrorist Hunting as well. Same rules apply.
4. For a trial time, we have added SJWs to the list of acceptable prey. Extra points if her "problem glasses" are in one piece!
You will need a permit, they are now available in the Church Lobby. The cost is $69.99. If you are not able to afford the cost of a Witch Hunting Permit, please fill out a "Hardship" Form available from a Pastor and a permit will be provided for you free of charge.
Winners will receive the coveted 2017 Witch Hunt Award, dinner for 4 at The Red Lobster, a gun of his/her choice from Bob4God's Gun World and a leather bound, over-sized KJV1611 Bible.
Now get out there and get us some witches!
Be GODLY, be good and most importantly HAVE FUN!
Post your results here!
Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.
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Unsaved trash, probably hopeless sinner
Foul Sinner on Moderation
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Posts: 256
Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: Tulsa, OL
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Re: 2017 Witch Hunt! -
10-06-2017, 02:47 AM
Oooh, speaking of witches, I was wondering if I should go as one for Halloween. I was thinking of going as Elvira, Mistress of the Dark. My spirit guardian.
<<<image unsuitable for younger audiences removed by a friendly moderator>>>
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Mayor of Freehold
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Posts: 12,176
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: City Hall, Freehold, Iowa
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Re: 2017 Witch Hunt! -
10-08-2017, 08:58 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda
Woot!!!
Gentlemen and pastors, get thee ready for another great year of WITCH HUNTING!Now get out there and get us some witches!
Be GODLY, be good and most importantly HAVE FUN!
Post your results here!
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This is one of the annual highlights here at Landover Baptist. Thank you, Sister Etheldreda, for provided this announcement.
What I like about the timing of the annual WITCH HUNT is it comes when the school year is just getting underway. What better teaching moment can there be than finding witches and getting rid of them.
Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.
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Trying to out-Methuselah Methuselah You kids get off his lawn!
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Posts: 22,439
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Close to God
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Re: 2017 Witch Hunt! -
10-08-2017, 09:35 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda
we have added SJWs to the list of acceptable prey
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I am very glad to hear that. Today a postwoman, I am not kidding here, arrived with a package. Since a woman delivering packages can clearly not be a Christian ( Ephesians 5:22-24), I am certain she was either a witch or worse, a feminist. I am glad we can shoot those as well now as the Godly Major Johny Joe Hold has implemented Biblical Law in Freehold during the annual Witch Hunt!
Freedom means voting for Donald Trump!
To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."
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Jesuit Insurgency Operative
Forum Member
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Posts: 606
Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: The evil city of Rome in the evil country of Italy, who was once Holy
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Re: 2017 Witch Hunt! -
10-11-2017, 11:48 AM
I would have liked to join the Witch Hunt, too bad that the Inquisition ended long ago.
Last edited by Roland; 10-11-2017 at 07:54 PM.
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Obese Swedish Meatball Delusional Forum Member
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Posts: 2,207
Join Date: May 2014
Location: On a mountain with a tree and a midgit
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Re: 2017 Witch Hunt! -
10-11-2017, 07:56 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Romeo Rovagnati
I would have liked to join the Witch Hunt, too bad that the Inquisition ended long ago.
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Did you miss the new Franco policies?
*We kicked them out long ago, it took 80 years though.
Jeremiah 6:21 Therefore thus saith the LORD, Behold, I will lay stumblingblocks before this people, and the fathers and the sons together shall fall upon them; the neighbour and his friend shall perish.
Best wishes for the people in Ukraine.
Last edited by Roland; 10-11-2017 at 09:29 PM.
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Unsaved trash
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Posts: 104
Join Date: Oct 2017
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Re: 2017 Witch Hunt! -
10-17-2017, 12:04 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by GaleWhoring
Oooh, speaking of witches, I was wondering if I should go as one for Halloween. I was thinking of going as Elvira, Mistress of the Dark. My spirit guardian.
<<<image unsuitable for younger audiences removed by a friendly moderator>>>
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I'm going as an iglacious. I have no costume.
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Director of the German "Holy-caust" Evangelical Crusade Jesus macht frei
True Christian™
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Posts: 5,914
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Black Forrest, Germany
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Re: 2017 Witch Hunt! -
10-17-2017, 03:46 PM
So do we have a minimum age restriction this year on who we can shoot? Last year a lot of people gave me bad looks for that Indian kid.
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True Christian™ Just a Regular Nice Guy
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Posts: 29,835
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Between Lynchburg and Walton's Mountain
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Re: 2017 Witch Hunt! -
10-17-2017, 03:56 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Titus Templeton
So do we have a minimum age restriction this year on who we can shoot? Last year a lot of people gave me bad looks for that Indian kid.
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Oh, that was because it was just an Indian, they really have no value at all and some were upset you added it to your tally. Truthfully, a dozen of them is like a a single normal witch.
Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
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Unsaved trash
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Posts: 104
Join Date: Oct 2017
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Re: 2017 Witch Hunt! -
10-18-2017, 02:40 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Romeo Rovagnati
I would have liked to join the Witch Hunt, too bad that the Inquisition ended long ago.
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No one expects the Spanish Inquisition. XD
Is this for real? Like is this REALLY real?
Are these people hunting humans? I'm surprised no one has called the cops on this forum... conspiracy to commit murder....
Oh and don't kill sjws they're my lol cows...with out them I have nothing to lol at.
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Distinguished Professor of Prayer Healing and Creation Zoology (Baraminology) Victim of atheist scientific persecution
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Posts: 10,337
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: On a mission in Godless Europistan
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Re: 2017 Witch Hunt! -
10-18-2017, 03:16 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Megan1993
I am not so devoid of empathy to see the troubled locked away or killed neither am I arrogant enough to believe I have authority over who has a soul or not.
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This is wonderful. You are leaving the judging of souls to Jesus (Revelation 20:13) and judging angels to us (1 Corinthians 6:3).
Quote:
Originally Posted by Megan1993
Oh and don't kill sjws they're my lol cows...with out them I have nothing to lol at.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Megan1993
I don't think all bronies are gay. They exhibit gay tendencies I'd say more like little manchilds obessed with ponies.
Trust me you'll want to go to a furry convention they're real dens of depravity there.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Megan1993
Hi...I see you guys were posting about bronies...I too hate bronies.
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Now I see, this is called a double standard or special pleading. The rules you try to impose on others do not concern you. It seems that you are allowed to ridicule people that you find inferior (SWJs, bronies) and call them names and rejoice in their antics. Your rules are not valid when it comes to you. Your rules, however, are valid when God or Jesus make statements that oppose your lifestyle. As we here on God's Favorite Forum are totally unbiased I can say that there is, of course, the possibility that you may be right and that your opinions should be given more reverence than to the opinions of God or Jesus. Please give us some justification to choose your ideas over theirs. Please be warned that in case you fail, Jesus has something to tell you!
Matthew 7:5
Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother's eye.
Yours in Christ,
Elmer
2 Kings 18:25 - Am I now come up without the LORD against this place to destroy it? The LORD said to me, Go up against this land, and destroy it.
PREPARE YOURSELF TO RAPTURE WITH THIS MANUAL!
Check out our Research in Creation Science:
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Unsaved trash
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Posts: 41
Join Date: Oct 2017
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Re: 2017 Witch Hunt! -
10-20-2017, 07:52 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda
Woot!!!
Gentlemen and pastors, get thee ready for another great year of WITCH HUNTING!
[/URL]
For the sake of the new folks, here are the rules: 1. To prove a kill you must submit genitals, teeth, ears or fingers or toes to the Pastors if you cannot bring in the entire body.
2. Severely maiming will get you points, but it's not as good as a kill.
3. Because of ISIS and unwanted immigration we are now allowing Terrorist Hunting as well. Same rules apply.
4. For a trial time, we have added SJWs to the list of acceptable prey. Extra points if her "problem glasses" are in one piece!
You will need a permit, they are now available in the Church Lobby. The cost is $69.99. If you are not able to afford the cost of a Witch Hunting Permit, please fill out a "Hardship" Form available from a Pastor and a permit will be provided for you free of charge.
Winners will receive the coveted 2017 Witch Hunt Award, dinner for 4 at The Red Lobster, a gun of his/her choice from Bob4God's Gun World and a leather bound, over-sized KJV1611 Bible.
Now get out there and get us some witches!
Be GODLY, be good and most importantly HAVE FUN!
Post your results here!
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Even speaking of this is a terrorist threat, and is illegal. Go here https:backdoorsluts9.com to see what is and isnt legal. If you aren't the woman I am quoting, dont go here.
Tell me when you have read the rules!
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Unsaved trash
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Posts: 41
Join Date: Oct 2017
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Re: 2017 Witch Hunt! -
10-20-2017, 07:57 PM
Correction- saying you will do it is a threat. My bad. https:backdoorsluts9.com
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Obese Swedish Meatball Delusional Forum Member
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Posts: 2,207
Join Date: May 2014
Location: On a mountain with a tree and a midgit
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Re: 2017 Witch Hunt! -
10-20-2017, 08:00 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Vantheman4321
Even speaking of this is a terrorist threat, and is illegal. Go here https:backdoorsluts9.com to see what is and isnt legal. If you aren't the woman I am quoting, dont go here.
Tell me when you have read the rules!
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Telling people not to do something might actually accomplish the opposite.
Jeremiah 6:21 Therefore thus saith the LORD, Behold, I will lay stumblingblocks before this people, and the fathers and the sons together shall fall upon them; the neighbour and his friend shall perish.
Best wishes for the people in Ukraine.
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Unsaved trash
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Posts: 41
Join Date: Oct 2017
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Re: 2017 Witch Hunt! -
10-20-2017, 08:06 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Roland
Telling people not to do something might actually accomplish the opposite.
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Ha. Wow. Nice work. Really. Although, what they are planning, that isnt legal. And now you have my IP. They are going to hurt people. I knew it was a logger THB.
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Unsaved trash
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Posts: 41
Join Date: Oct 2017
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Re: 2017 Witch Hunt! -
10-20-2017, 08:19 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda
Woot!!!
Gentlemen and pastors, get thee ready for another great year of WITCH HUNTING!
For the sake of the new folks, here are the rules:
1. To prove a kill you must submit genitals, teeth, ears or fingers or toes to the Pastors if you cannot bring in the entire body.
2. Severely maiming will get you points, but it's not as good as a kill.
3. Because of ISIS and unwanted immigration we are now allowing Terrorist Hunting as well. Same rules apply.
4. For a trial time, we have added SJWs to the list of acceptable prey. Extra points if her "problem glasses" are in one piece!
You will need a permit, they are now available in the Church Lobby. The cost is $69.99. If you are not able to afford the cost of a Witch Hunting Permit, please fill out a "Hardship" Form available from a Pastor and a permit will be provided for you free of charge.
Winners will receive the coveted 2017 Witch Hunt Award, dinner for 4 at The Red Lobster, a gun of his/her choice from Bob4God's Gun World and a leather bound, over-sized KJV1611 Bible.
Now get out there and get us some witches!
Be GODLY, be good and most importantly HAVE FUN!
Post your results here!
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I have contacted the police...
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Obese Swedish Meatball Delusional Forum Member
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Posts: 2,207
Join Date: May 2014
Location: On a mountain with a tree and a midgit
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Re: 2017 Witch Hunt! -
10-20-2017, 08:21 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Vantheman4321
Ha. Wow. Nice work. Really. Although, what they are planning, that isnt legal. And now you have my IP. They are going to hurt people. I knew it was a logger THB.
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I don´t quite follow your reasoning. Who is planning what? Why are you worried about people getting hurt? And please don´t worry about ip addresses, computers need them to communicate.
Quote:
I have contacted the police...
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Nice to see you are looking for help. Good luck!
Jeremiah 6:21 Therefore thus saith the LORD, Behold, I will lay stumblingblocks before this people, and the fathers and the sons together shall fall upon them; the neighbour and his friend shall perish.
Best wishes for the people in Ukraine.
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Unsaved trash
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Posts: 41
Join Date: Oct 2017
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Re: 2017 Witch Hunt! -
10-20-2017, 08:25 PM
I would be concerned that she is planning/telling others to mame and kill other humans. That's all. Yes I am worried about peoples toes and genitals getting cut off.
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Obese Swedish Meatball Delusional Forum Member
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Posts: 2,207
Join Date: May 2014
Location: On a mountain with a tree and a midgit
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Re: 2017 Witch Hunt! -
10-20-2017, 10:17 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Vantheman4321
I would be concerned that she is planning/telling others to mame and kill other humans. That's all. Yes I am worried about peoples toes and genitals getting cut off.
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Acting like an idiot might get you banned.
Jeremiah 6:21 Therefore thus saith the LORD, Behold, I will lay stumblingblocks before this people, and the fathers and the sons together shall fall upon them; the neighbour and his friend shall perish.
Best wishes for the people in Ukraine.
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Former Mary Hailer who has seen The Light©
True Christian™
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Posts: 10,391
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Surrounded By Married Homos and Baby Killers in Godless England
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Re: 2017 Witch Hunt! -
10-25-2017, 08:06 AM
I think I may have found one. She is clearly wanton. She is clearly using vile influences upon men to inspire lustful thoughts. She has a cat which stares at me in far too meaningful a way as if it knows the effect her wicked spells have on my privy member. She moved in recently to the house down the street and wears scandalous attire and is seeing men for sexual gratification, that much is clear - I have seen them through my binoculars.
Should I torture a confession out of her first or just kill her swiftly and secretly?
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