General Church Fellowship A place for True Christians to join in praise, faith and fellowship. |
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Trying to out-Methuselah Methuselah You kids get off his lawn!
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Posts: 22,424
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Close to God
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Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone! -
05-24-2011, 09:08 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jo Freddie
Trying to work out if I should now describe myself as re-born, or re-heated.
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You could also shut up! Did you consider that? Didn't think so.
Psalm 4:4 "Stand in awe, and sin not: commune with your own heart upon your bed, and be still."
Freedom means voting for Donald Trump!
To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."
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Unsaved trash Hateful God mocking pirate
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Posts: 6,336
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: The Land of the Beer Volcano and Stripper Factory.
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Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone! -
05-24-2011, 09:17 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cranky Old Man
You could also shut up! Did you consider that? Didn't think so.
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How can I stay quiet? I have seen such wondrous sights, tasted such heavenly delights. I have been to the Volcano!
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Trying to out-Methuselah Methuselah You kids get off his lawn!
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Posts: 22,424
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Close to God
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Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone! -
05-24-2011, 09:19 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jo Freddie
How can I stay quiet? I have seen such wondrous sights, tasted such heavenly delights. I have been to the Volcano!
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Why didn't you jump in that Volcano?
Freedom means voting for Donald Trump!
To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."
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Unsaved trash Hateful God mocking pirate
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Posts: 6,336
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: The Land of the Beer Volcano and Stripper Factory.
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Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone! -
05-24-2011, 09:32 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cranky Old Man
Why didn't you jump in that Volcano?
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I did, I swam in the Beer
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 80
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Dothan, Alabama (for now...)
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Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone! -
06-02-2011, 02:18 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lycia The Repentant
Great, not only do we not have any idea where he is now, but he's also NAKED.
Should we put out a high orange alert level for the Ladies of Landover?
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Depends on whether or not he was wearing longjohns, doesn't it? At least then, he wouldn't be completely naked...
Then again, maybe it's a good idea, just in case...
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Family Man of the Year 2010-2013 About as Straight and Manly as you can get Hates anal sex. And trees.
True Christian™
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Posts: 8,323
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Protecting my children from homosexuals
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Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone! -
06-02-2011, 02:25 AM
When a born again Christian tells a story about going to Heaven during a near death experience, it is always true. When it happens to a Pastafarian, it is just a psychotic delusion. That is because the God they worship doesn't exist. Ours does. See how obvious the difference is? It is so tangible and accessible to people. Non-believers truly deserve eternal damnation.
The Only Real Climate Change Will be Hell!
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 80
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Dothan, Alabama (for now...)
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Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone! -
06-02-2011, 02:25 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by godismighty
one of my friends had this kind of experience back in the 80's but...he was abducted by soviets...
freddie you should check that the russians havn't implanted a probe in your rectum....
yours in christ
-peter
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That sounds like an incredibly horrible experience...
It almost made me throw up.
Why would Russians even have an interest in that kind of thing?!
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 80
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Dothan, Alabama (for now...)
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Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone! -
06-02-2011, 02:29 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Billy Bob Jenkins
When a born again Christian tells a story about going to Heaven during a near death experience, it is always true. When it happens to a Pastafarian, it is just a psychotic delusion. That is because the God they worship doesn't exist. Ours does. See how obvious the difference is? It is so tangible and accessible to people. Non-believers truly deserve eternal damnation.
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Good point. It's like the other "gods" that are man-made... except this one can be eaten. Seriously, why would anybody worship food? I don't get it. Food is for eating... not worshipping
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Unsaved trash Hateful God mocking pirate
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Posts: 6,336
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: The Land of the Beer Volcano and Stripper Factory.
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Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone! -
06-02-2011, 02:39 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Billy Bob Jenkins
When a born again Christian tells a story about going to Heaven during a near death experience, it is always true. When it happens to a Pastafarian, it is just a psychotic delusion.
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I did not have a near death experience, resulting in a delusional episode. The event did not just happen within my imagination, there is photographic evidence of the aftermath of me being taken, my partner was there when Our Lord took me to The Volcano.
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Unsaved trash Hateful God mocking pirate
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Posts: 6,336
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: The Land of the Beer Volcano and Stripper Factory.
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Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone! -
06-02-2011, 02:47 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by DDM1985
Good point. It's like the other "gods" that are man-made... except this one can be eaten. Seriously, why would anybody worship food? I don't get it. Food is for eating... not worshipping
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Let The Holy Text explain...
FAQ 64-74
Quote:
Frequently Asked: “Well, one aspect of other religions you do have is a god. Who happens to be made of pasta. Isn't it sorta wrong to eat what He's made of?”
And the Dalai Llama Answered: “Eat some of this bread instead, and wash it down with this wine, then.”
Frequently Asked: “What?”
And the Dalai Llama Answered: “The Flying Spaghetti Monster is not pasta, but a deity who chooses to represent Himself as pasta. If you like Pasta, go ahead and eat some. He doesn'tmind, because the Sharing of the Pasta is a form of worship. Especially the sharing part. Transubstantiation is not part of Pastafarian doctrine. That means when you eat Pasta, you aren't eating Him, but eating Pasta.”
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Family Man of the Year 2010-2013 About as Straight and Manly as you can get Hates anal sex. And trees.
True Christian™
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Posts: 8,323
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Protecting my children from homosexuals
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Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone! -
06-02-2011, 08:55 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jo Freddie
I did not have a near death experience, resulting in a delusional episode. The event did not just happen within my imagination, there is photographic evidence of the aftermath of me being taken, my partner was there when Our Lord took me to The Volcano.
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I am not interested in hearing about your delusions of salvation. Only True Christians™ can be saved. Not noodle worshiping Pastafarians. I have already explained the vast difference between your religion and the Truth©. The difference is that your God doesn't exist, and I have faith. Not only that, but there are huge mountains of decisive evidence that my God exists, while everyone knows that spaghetti does not fly unless you are throwing it at your wife as punishment for screwing it up, not that I would every eat a false idol like spaghetti. The evidence for my God has been documented in the KJV Bible, and also by scientists such as Ray Comfort and Kirk Cameron. Haven't you ever seen a banana before? A banana proves that God exists, but a bowl of spaghetti does not. Spaghetti was created by Satan to deceive you.
The Only Real Climate Change Will be Hell!
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Completely CRAZY for the Lord
True Christian™
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Posts: 14,663
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Leviticus Landing
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Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone! -
06-02-2011, 09:20 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jo Freddie
I did not have a near death experience, resulting in a delusional episode.
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Your experience was more likely to be a delusional episode resulting in a near death experience, Mr Freddie!
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Trying to out-Methuselah Methuselah You kids get off his lawn!
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Posts: 22,424
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Close to God
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Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone! -
06-02-2011, 09:23 PM
Is this thread still active? I leave and come back all the time. It's called going to the toilet.
Freedom means voting for Donald Trump!
To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."
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Unsaved trash Hateful God mocking pirate
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Posts: 6,336
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: The Land of the Beer Volcano and Stripper Factory.
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Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone! -
06-02-2011, 11:01 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Billy Bob Jenkins
I am not interested in hearing about your delusions of salvation. Only True Christians™ can be saved. Not noodle worshiping Pastafarians. I have already explained the vast difference between your religion and the Truth. The difference is that your God doesn't exist, and I have faith. Not only that, but there are huge mountains of decisive evidence that my God exists, while everyone knows that spaghetti does not fly unless you are throwing it at your wife as punishment for screwing it up, not that I would every eat a false idol like spaghetti. The evidence for my God has been documented in the KJV Bible, and also by scientists such as Ray Comfort and Kirk Cameron. Haven't you ever seen a banana before? A banana proves that God exists, but a bowl of spaghetti does not. Spaghetti was created by Satan to deceive you.
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I do not dispute that God exists, as for the work of any scientist, they are all playthings of Our Lord, he uses his Noodly appendage to adjust any result to that, which for some reason, amuses Him.
Yet again you display you inability to understand a simple concept, God is NOT Pasta, Pasta is NOT God, God CHOOSES to represent himself as Pasta, and gave us the means to make Pasta and Noodles so we could make a simple nutritional meal, that we can share with others to honour Him.
You worship a very insecure god of hate, vengeance, violence, jealousy amongst other less then noble traits, a being that is not worthy of our love & respect.
I worship a God of Love, OK he his a little absent minded at times and takes his eye of the ball from time to time, but that just makes Him all the more Loveable.
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Landover Security Superviser Asset Loss Prevention and Personal Security Expert NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
True Christian™
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Posts: 18,555
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold Iowa
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Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone! -
06-02-2011, 11:11 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jo Freddie
I do not dispute that God exists, as for the work of any scientist, they are all playthings of Our Lord, he uses his Noodly appendage to adjust any result to that, which for some reason, amuses Him.
Yet again you display you inability to understand a simple concept, God is NOT Pasta, Pasta is NOT God, God CHOOSES to represent himself as Pasta, and gave us the means to make Pasta and Noodles so we could make a simple nutritional meal, that we can share with others to honour Him.
You worship a very insecure god of hate, vengeance, violence, jealousy amongst other less then noble traits, a being that is not worthy of our love & respect.
I worship a God of Love, OK he his a little absent minded at times and takes his eye of the ball from time to time, but that just makes Him all the more Loveable.
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PROVE your' god exists Jo Freddie.
It should be easy. Just give us a Bible quote.
Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.
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Time to come clean on Benghazi Mr Obama!
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Unsaved trash Hateful God mocking pirate
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Posts: 6,336
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: The Land of the Beer Volcano and Stripper Factory.
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Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone! -
06-03-2011, 12:09 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bobby-Joe
PROVE your' god exists Jo Freddie.
It should be easy. Just give us a Bible quote.
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Where in the bible does it say that God in not the Flying Spaghetti Monster, if you can prove that Jesus is not the Son of the FSM there is a prize waiting for you to claim.
The Flying Spaghetti Monster does in deed speak though your Bible, as I have pointed out MANY times before.
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Family Man of the Year 2010-2013 About as Straight and Manly as you can get Hates anal sex. And trees.
True Christian™
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Posts: 8,323
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Protecting my children from homosexuals
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Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone! -
06-06-2011, 01:37 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jo Freddie
Where in the bible does it say that God in not the Flying Spaghetti Monster, if you can prove that Jesus is not the Son of the FSM there is a prize waiting for you to claim.
The Flying Spaghetti Monster does in deed speak though your Bible, as I have pointed out MANY times before.
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You can hide in your dark closet of ignorance all you want, Mr. Freddie, running with sea-faring gangsters, doing marijuana, engaging in anal sex... but God isn't fooled. You are fooling yourself.
I'm telling you, spaghetti doesn't exist. God exists.
The Only Real Climate Change Will be Hell!
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Unsaved trash Hateful God mocking pirate
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Posts: 6,336
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: The Land of the Beer Volcano and Stripper Factory.
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Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone! -
06-06-2011, 10:13 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Billy Bob Jenkins
You can hide in your dark closet of ignorance all you want, Mr. Freddie, running with sea-faring gangsters, doing marijuana, engaging in anal sex... but God isn't fooled. You are fooling yourself.
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Still choosing to ignore the possibility that God is the flying Spaghetti Monster BB, I will repeat...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jo Freddie
Where in the bible does it say that God in not the Flying Spaghetti Monster
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Billy Bob Jenkins
I'm telling you, spaghetti doesn't exist. God exists.
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Then what is this?
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Family Man of the Year 2010-2013 About as Straight and Manly as you can get Hates anal sex. And trees.
True Christian™
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Posts: 8,323
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Protecting my children from homosexuals
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Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone! -
06-10-2011, 12:53 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jo Freddie
Then what is this?
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Some demonic ectoplasm or something. God is the only thing worthy of your attention, Jo Pasta. Stop sinning and throw yourself to the ground in sublime adoration for the invisible and omnipotent God who surreptitiously causes so many events with otherwise perfectly natural explanations. Feed yourself with the nourishing Blood of Christ, not the foulness of spaghettios or whatever other abominations you pirates consume.
The Only Real Climate Change Will be Hell!
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Unsaved trash Hateful God mocking pirate
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Posts: 6,336
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: The Land of the Beer Volcano and Stripper Factory.
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Re: Where has Jo Freddie gone! -
06-10-2011, 09:40 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Billy Bob Jenkins
God is the only thing worthy of your attention, Jo Pasta. Stop sinning and throw yourself to the ground in sublime adoration for the invisible and omnipotent God who surreptitiously causes so many events with otherwise perfectly natural explanations.
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I do not dispute the existence of God or how awesome He is, just who he is!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jo Freddie
Still choosing to ignore the possibility that God is the flying Spaghetti Monster BB, I will repeat...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jo Freddie
Where in the bible does it say that God in not the Flying Spaghetti Monster
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