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Default Re: Infractions - 10-21-2006, 12:19 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
THE NATURAL ORDER??
In many pre-xtian religions, Zekey, GODDESS worship is featured. Or, an equal standing between male and female deities. Natural order, bah.

You wouldn't exist if not for a woman, you know!
Yes, and satan has directed his minions to worship rocks and attempt to read the future by gazing upon chicken entrails....what is your point? The 6,000 year history of the earth is rife with cultism and ooga booga foolishness. But there is only ONE TRUE GOD, and we know He sacrificed His only begotten son for our sins.

As far as females go, I am well aware that they are needed for baking future Soldiers for Christ, but you feminazis always have to over dramatize everything. We place great value on our females. Who else would fetch our beers, scrub the skid marks out of our briefs, and perform "other" wifely duties?


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

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Default Re: Infractions - 10-21-2006, 12:37 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
Yes, and satan has directed his minions to worship rocks and attempt to read the future by gazing upon chicken entrails....what is your point? The 6,000 year history of the earth is rife with cultism and ooga booga foolishness. But there is only ONE TRUE GOD, and we know He sacrificed His only begotten son for our sins.
The point is that xtians act like their religion is the first. When it most clearly is NOT.
If anything xtians and other abrahamic religions are the ones who reversed the natural order, not the other way round
Ever notice how most other religions EXCEPT for the abrahamic ones tend to be PEACEFUL?

Quote:
As far as females go, I am well aware that they are needed for baking future Soldiers for Christ, but you feminazis always have to over dramatize everything. We place great value on our females. Who else would fetch our beers, scrub the skid marks out of our briefs, and perform "other" wifely duties?
Too much information there, thankyou very much. I surely don't need to hear about your 'Godly skidmarks'!
And we do not over dramatize.
Have a look at the way women are treated as inferior even in so called modern society. Same job, less pay. People give us less credibility.
It's currently a man's world, and damned if I don't want to see that change!



Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!
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Default Re: Infractions - 10-21-2006, 12:38 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
You wouldn't exist if not for a woman, you know!
And we'd still be in the Garden of Eden if not for you;

Genesis 3:16 (KJV1611)
Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.

That is what God Himself said to you after you disobeyed His Command and ate the fruit from the tree. Since then, for the last six thousand years, we've been forced to look after your sorry butts and put up with 6 month discussions on re-decorating.

You are God's gift to us, plain and simple. You do as you're told. If I gave you a gift and all it did was natter incessantly about nothing, would you consider it a gift? Of course not.

Now accept the truth Ms. Hellbound; you women have caused enough trouble already.

Dean
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Default Re: Infractions - 10-21-2006, 12:57 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
The point is that xtians act like their religion is the first. When it most clearly is NOT.
If anything xtians and other abrahamic religions are the ones who reversed the natural order, not the other way round
Ever notice how most other religions EXCEPT for the abrahamic ones tend to be PEACEFUL?

You empty-headed fool. God has been God from the beginning of time, because He created the universe in 6 days.

As far as being "peaceful" goes, do you bring peace to your enemies? Jesus gives me unlimited peace, but I pity the fools who reject him. You want peace? Tithe generously and you will be overwhelmed with a feeling like no other.



Too much information there, thankyou very much. I surely don't need to hear about your 'Godly skidmarks'!
And we do not over dramatize.
Have a look at the way women are treated as inferior even in so called modern society. Same job, less pay. People give us less credibility.
It's currently a man's world, and damned if I don't want to see that change!

You are given less credibility because you deserve less. Read the Book of Genesis and see. Females have their place, and that is a few paces behind their husband, or at the stove, or on their knees....before Jesus.

Oh and by the way, you are right about one thing: you ARE damned.
You can spend eternity bitching about your "rights" to your master satan.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: Infractions - 10-21-2006, 01:21 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Deaner View Post
And we'd still be in the Garden of Eden if not for you;

Genesis 3:16 (KJV1611)
Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.

That is what God Himself said to you after you disobeyed His Command and ate the fruit from the tree. Since then, for the last six thousand years, we've been forced to look after your sorry butts and put up with 6 month discussions on re-decorating.

You are God's gift to us, plain and simple. You do as you're told. If I gave you a gift and all it did was natter incessantly about nothing, would you consider it a gift? Of course not.

Now accept the truth Ms. Hellbound; you women have caused enough trouble already.

Dean
That was a book written by men. A storybook written by men. Who are, of course, going to make themselves seem like the good guys. And lets pretend the bible isn't just a fairytale. Did Adam eat the apple unwillingly? Did Eve shove it down his throat? Noooo...he seemed quite happy to eat it.
Just like a typical man, blame everything on women.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zeke the MEANIE
You empty-headed fool. God has been God from the beginning of time, because He created the universe in 6 days.

As far as being "peaceful" goes, do you bring peace to your enemies? Jesus gives me unlimited peace, but I pity the fools who reject him. You want peace? Tithe generously and you will be overwhelmed with a feeling like no other.

Xtianity was not the first religion, Zekey. Any decent historian can tell you as much.
And as far as peaceful, other religions tend to focus on harmony, and self enlightenment, not bigotry and intolerance as the abrahamic ones do.
And if I tithe, I'm sure I will indeed be overwhelmed....with a feeling of brokeness!

Quote:
You are given less credibility because you deserve less. Read the Book of Genesis and see. Females have their place, and that is a few paces behind their husband, or at the stove, or on their knees....before Jesus.

Speaking of stove, replying to this thread caused my cooking to almost burn. I hope you're happy
We deserve as much respect as any man, and it just isn't right that some people will refuse a woman doctor/lawyer/etc on the basis of, they don't have a schlong.

Quote:
Oh and by the way, you are right about one thing: you ARE damned.

Eh, if there really is a hell, it'd be better than spending eternity with xtians anyway.

Quote:
You can spend eternity bitching about your "rights" to your master satan.old
If there really is a hell and I do end up there, believe me, I will!



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Default Re: Infractions - 10-21-2006, 02:26 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
You wouldn't exist if not for a woman, you know!
Typical backwards female thinking. All women wouldn't exist if it wasn't for a MAN named JESUS deciding to create them. God only knows what He was thinking.


O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.


God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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Default Re: Infractions - 10-21-2006, 04:52 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
Ever notice how most other religions EXCEPT for the abrahamic ones tend to be PEACEFUL?
We all know how peaceful the ancient Mesoamerican religions were, particularly the Aztec religion. And let's not forget that wonderfully peaceful goddess-centered religion, the thuggee cult (which gave us our word "thug").


This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.

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Default Re: Infractions - 10-22-2006, 01:11 AM

Question: What exactly is an infraction?
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Default Re: Infractions - 10-22-2006, 01:23 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Capatain View Post
Question: What exactly is an infraction?
You've already earned some. Infractions are negative points issued by administrators or moderators when certain rules are violated. Accumulate enough of them, and you can get your posting abilities restricted, or even revoked permanently.

I suggest that you read the Holy Bible from cover to cover. I also suggest that you ask Jesus to take control of your life, before its too late. The clock is ticking, jennifer.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: Infractions - 10-22-2006, 01:30 AM

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Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
You've already earned some. Infractions are negative points issued by administrators or moderators when certain rules are violated. Accumulate enough of them, and you can get your posting abilities restricted, or even revoked permanently.

I suggest that you read the Holy Bible from cover to cover. I also suggest that you ask Jesus to take control of your life, before its too late. The clock is ticking, jennifer.
Who's Jennifer?
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Default Re: Infractions - 10-22-2006, 01:42 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Capatain View Post
Who's Jennifer?
It's you, Jennifer. Stop behaving like a Jennifer and people may not refer to you in that fashion.


Revelation 21:8 But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.
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Default Re: Infractions - 10-22-2006, 01:45 AM

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Originally Posted by Enobarbus View Post
It's you, Jennifer. Stop behaving like a Jennifer and people may not refer to you in that fashion.
What's "a Jennifer"? Is that term in the Bible?
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Default Re: Infractions - 10-22-2006, 01:58 AM

Would you prefer Sally?


God bless America, the Second Amendment and the Constitution. God bless the United States Marine Corps and all who fight for Jesus in third world cess pools. God bless the GOP and all they stand for, Truth, Honesty and the American people. God bless Landover Baptist Church and all True Christians™ the world over. Curses to our Muslim President, his failure is our Salvation.
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Default Re: Infractions - 10-22-2006, 03:22 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
That was a book written by men. A storybook written by men. Who are, of course, going to make themselves seem like the good guys. And lets pretend the bible isn't just a fairytale. Did Adam eat the apple unwillingly? Did Eve shove it down his throat? Noooo...he seemed quite happy to eat it.
Just like a typical man, blame everything on women.


Xtianity was not the first religion, Zekey. Any decent historian can tell you as much.
And as far as peaceful, other religions tend to focus on harmony, and self enlightenment, not bigotry and intolerance as the abrahamic ones do.
And if I tithe, I'm sure I will indeed be overwhelmed....with a feeling of brokeness!

[/color]
Speaking of stove, replying to this thread caused my cooking to almost burn. I hope you're happy
[color=red]We deserve as much respect as any man, and it just isn't right that some people will refuse a woman doctor/lawyer/etc on the basis of, they don't have a schlong.


Eh, if there really is a hell, it'd be better than spending eternity with xtians anyway.


If there really is a hell and I do end up there, believe me, I will!


Precisely! All the bleating that goes on about that damned apple & no one ever mentions that Adam had a choice. Old schlongbrain didn't have to eat the damn thing,but being a bloke he just couldn't say no.
Completely lacking in will power & dim with it.


In order to be old & wise,you must first be young & stupid.
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Default Re: Infractions - 10-22-2006, 09:07 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by lilith View Post
Precisely! All the bleating that goes on about that damned apple & no one ever mentions that Adam had a choice. Old schlongbrain didn't have to eat the damn thing,but being a bloke he just couldn't say no.
Completely lacking in will power & dim with it.
Adam wasn't the only man who was deceived by an empty-headed female, he was just the first. Besides, a man has to eat, doesn't he?


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: Infractions - 10-22-2006, 09:14 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by lilith View Post
Precisely! All the bleating that goes on about that damned apple & no one ever mentions that Adam had a choice. Old schlongbrain didn't have to eat the damn thing,but being a bloke he just couldn't say no.
Completely lacking in will power & dim with it.
Listen, you trollop! Poor Adam had no concept of good or evil until that whore Eve wrapped her hairy legs around his head and forced him to eat the apple under pain of asphyxiation. She and SATAN had a deal going, you understand? And when GOD found out about it He rightfully punished Eve and ALL women for eternity to be the property and chattel of men to teach them who is boss! Now get to groveling before I have to knock some sense into you, and your little dog, too!


Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
"God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6


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Default Re: Infractions - 10-22-2006, 11:37 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Al E Pistle View Post
Listen, you trollop! Poor Adam had no concept of good or evil until that whore Eve wrapped her hairy legs around his head and forced him to eat the apple under pain of asphyxiation. She and SATAN had a deal going, you understand? And when GOD found out about it He rightfully punished Eve and ALL women for eternity to be the property and chattel of men to teach them who is boss! Now get to groveling before I have to knock some sense into you, and your little dog, too!
I do hope you aren't referring to me here, Pastor Al?

And he did have a choice:

Genesis 3:6 6And when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make one wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her; and he did eat.

Genesis 3:12 12And the man said, The woman whom thou gavest to be with me, she gave me of the tree, and I did eat.

Does it say she forced him?



Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!
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Default Re: Infractions - 10-22-2006, 12:47 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
And he did have a choice:
That's correct Rachell; it's all been a learning process and Adam was rebuked;

Genesis 3:17 (KJV1611)
And unto Adam he said, Because thou hast hearkened unto the voice of thy wife, and hast eaten of the tree, of which I commanded thee, saying, Thou shalt not eat of it: cursed is the ground for thy sake; in sorrow shalt thou eat of it all the days of thy life;

You see strumpet? "Hearkened unto the voice of thy wife".

Do you think Jesus was trying to send a message to Adam? Do you think that removing Adam from paradise and forcing him to toil and sweat for the rest of his days just because he listened to a woman was something Jesus wanted Adam to remember?

Let's put this into persepective; the very first thing MAN-kind was punished for was listening to a woman.

The VERY FIRST THING.

Is this clear enough Ms. Hellbound? We've learned our lesson. You on the other hand are still refusing to accept responsibility.

Dean
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Default Re: Infractions - 10-22-2006, 12:58 PM

I won't accept repsonsibility for an action which didn't exist.

The bible was obviously written by A MAN. Obviously, it'll be a little biased towards that end of the gender spectrum.



Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!
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Default Re: Infractions - 10-22-2006, 03:22 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
The bible was obviously written by A MAN. Obviously, it'll be a little biased towards that end of the gender spectrum.
So you admit God is male then? Praise!


O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.


God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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