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The introduction forum Attention Unsaved Trash: This the ONLY subforum you can start threads in. Here is where you introduce yourself. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus.

 
 
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NuclearWalrusNetwork NuclearWalrusNetwork is offline
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Join Date: May 2017
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Default The story of NuclearWalrusNetwork - 05-17-2017, 05:46 PM

As a Walrus, I come from the far north, where my people are persecuted and even killed by Snow Indians who do not know Jesus. So we led an Exodus to the Holy Land, Landover Baptist Church, where I enrolled at their university, and became an advocate to end Christian persecution by people such as Snow Indians, Mooselambs, Homosexuals, Demonrats, Pagans, and all other heathens.

Now, studying Creation Science, I work as a Christian Media Inspector on the side. My job is to determine which pop cultures are for us saved Christians, and which are for the liberal heathens. You'd be suprised how difficult that is.


Some of you may wonder how a Walrus can speak and use a computer, or how someone like me was even saved. Well, long ago, a missionary from Landover came to the north in an effort to try and spread the Lord's word to the Snow Indians. The heretics didn't listen, but I did. And that night, while I slept, God came to me and said "Man or Walrus, you are all my children. And you are the first of your kind to see the Light, and I bless you with the gift of knowledge." And so I had knowledge.


When I finish my studies, I'm going to travel the world, and show the rest of the animal kingdom the Lord's Word, for God chose me to be their ambassador to mankind.


As for my favorite Bible verse, that's very difficult to decide, considering that it's quite literally the best book ever written. And as a science major, I enjoy interpreting Genesis. So I'd say Genesis 1:1, the beginning of everything.
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