Promise Enforcers - Men Only! We make Promise Keepers look like homers! No homosexuals or women allowed! |
Unsaved trash, hippie dopehead
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Posts: 156
Join Date: Nov 2006
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Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!) -
09-18-2008, 04:28 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by eliot mayfield
Why are you back here?
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Why is that your business?
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God Squad
True Christian™
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Posts: 9,322
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: rebuking eurotrash commies
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Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!) -
09-18-2008, 04:30 PM
I bet the county child care services would like to know you're writing a porno book! Maybe you'll lose your kids, AGAIN!!
You still stinking drunk? How many times you wet the bed this week!!
Matthew:
5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
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Honorary True Christian™
Forum Member
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Posts: 13,993
Join Date: May 2008
Location: North Salem, Indiana
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Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!) -
09-18-2008, 05:51 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alex the Russian
I think a man should keep his face as far away from there as possible. If I even THINK I can smell one during a business meeting, I leave the conference room.
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Brother, why would a woman be in a business meeting?
I, for one, can honestly say that I have never once attended a business meeting where any cooters were on display! It's just not appropriate!
Bible boring? Nonsense!
Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!
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Senior Usher True Christian™ missionary to the Unsaved Kingdom A very nice young man
True Christian™
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Posts: 15,647
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: South Yorkshire, hotbed of sin
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Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!) -
09-18-2008, 08:21 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dwayne DeKalb
Harlot juices is very offensive and disrespectful to women.
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If women are that offended by their harlot juices then they should stop spraying them about the place! Is that really so much to ask?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hitoshi
I need grow mustache!
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It's not often I say this, but you could do worse than asking Old Iron Crotch for advice.
O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.
God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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Sinner Who Has Found the Truth©
True Christian™
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Posts: 3,146
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Freehold, IA.
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Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!) -
09-18-2008, 08:28 PM
You need grow about 6 more inches first fish head eater.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hitoshi
I need grow mustache!
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Leviticus 26:27-29
27 And if ye will not for all this hearken unto me, but walk contrary unto me;
28 Then I will walk contrary unto you also in fury; and I, even I, will chastise you seven times for your sins.
29 And ye shall eat the flesh of your sons, and the flesh of your daughters shall ye eat.
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
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Posts: 79,910
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!) -
09-19-2008, 12:22 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hitoshi
I need grow mustache!
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That would take you years, and only if you slathered on large amounts of Rogain©.
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
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Moderator Arms Dealer for CHRIST Hands folded for Jesus
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Posts: 5,251
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: On the Straight and Narrow (Earthly location: Freehold, Iowa)
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Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!) -
09-19-2008, 03:45 AM
Cooters are disgusting stinky pits of whore-goo and germs.
I used to require my wife to place one of those scented Glade plug-ins in her cooter before I realized those electrical outlet tongs might cause sinful pleasure, and I promptly switched her to lemon Lysol scented spray three times a day for a clean you can smell!
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Forum Member
Forum Member
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Posts: 418
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: huddled up in a corner
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Re: Mustache Rides and You -
09-19-2008, 05:24 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marshall
Don't they pee out of it too?
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I think you got that confused with the urethra. That's not in the same place as the vagina.
"A she-goff who claims to not be a witch is the worst kind of contradiction."
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Honorary True Christian™ Sweet Placid Sister
Forum Member
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Posts: 9,562
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Surrounded by hippie vermin
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Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!) -
09-19-2008, 06:31 AM
Pastors, forgive me for coming into the men's area; Sister BTB mentioned that Old Man Hatchet had said that we weren't meant to eat cooters, and I was quite surprised and a bit disturbed to hear this.
Nearly all of the ladies who stay at The Monthly Visitor will tell you that they were overjoyed to finally lay their lips on some tasty cooters while staying! When Fanny sets her famous cooter pie before the ladies, they all dive in, lapping up all the tasty juices!
THIS isn't Fanny's recipe, but it'll give you an idea of what goes into the tastiest cooter in all of Freehold! I tell ya, my mouth waters just THINKING about Fanny's cooter pie!
Quote:
COOTER PIE
1 med.-sized cooter
1/2 c. stewed tomatoes
1 c. sweet milk
1 c. liquor from stew pot
1 tbsp. whiskey
Celery salt
Red pepper
2 hard-boiled eggs, cut up
2 slices toasted bread, crumbled
Worcestershire sauce
2 tbsp. butter
1 tbsp. sherry
Mace
Black pepper to taste
Drop live cooter in a pot of boiling water. Cook 45 minutes. Open shell with a saw and take out meat, fat, liver, and eggs. Be careful not to break the gall. Remove meat from the feet and lets. Put all this in a pot with a little water and salt; then stew until tender, usually about 1 hour.
Next, cut up meat, liver, and eggs. Add stewed tomatoes, milk, liquor from stew pot, butter, whiskey, sherry, eggs (cut up), bread crumbs, and seasonings. Put in shell (which has been provided by the cooter and has been thoroughly cleaned). Cover with cracker crumbs, dot with butter, and bake in 375 degree oven about 45 minutes.
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Super Moderator Beloved Church Elder World's Greatest Father and Grandfather
True Christian™
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Posts: 2,071
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!) -
09-19-2008, 10:46 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by JennyD
THIS isn't Fanny's recipe, but it'll give you an idea of what goes into the tastiest cooter in all of Freehold! I tell ya, my mouth waters just THINKING about Fanny's cooter pie!
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Young lady, I am outraged that you posted a recipe in the Men Only forum, although my outrage is mitigated by the fact that it calls for such manly ingredients as whiskey and Worcestershire sauce; however, that is preponderated by the fact that it calls for sweet milk and sherry, so we're right back to square one with my outrage.
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Professor of Engrish
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Posts: 443
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: original is Japan but now am student in America here (am go for be engineer)
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Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!) -
09-19-2008, 11:30 AM
okay ladies who are ready for their ride?
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
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Posts: 79,910
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!) -
09-19-2008, 11:37 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hitoshi
okay ladies who are ready for their ride?
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You look like a queer Pancho Villa.
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
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Unsaved trash, hippie dopehead
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Posts: 156
Join Date: Nov 2006
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Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!) -
09-19-2008, 11:46 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel
You look like a queer Pancho Villa.
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That's rude. He's just trying to fit in. He's probably confused and thinks you have to have a mustache to get a girlfriend in America.
Hitoshi, having a mustache is more likely to get you a boyfriend in America.
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Moderator Arms Dealer for CHRIST Hands folded for Jesus
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Posts: 5,251
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: On the Straight and Narrow (Earthly location: Freehold, Iowa)
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Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!) -
09-19-2008, 02:21 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dwayne DeKalb
Hitoshi, having a mustache is more likely to get you a boyfriend in America.
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Maybe you two should get together, faggot.
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Unsaved trash, hippie dopehead
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Posts: 156
Join Date: Nov 2006
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Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!) -
09-19-2008, 04:23 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bob4God
Maybe you two should get together, faggot.
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That's a very ugly word, the word of someone who doesn't know how to express himself intelligently. For the record, I would be happy to get together with Hitoshi as a friend and learn more about his fascinating culture. I respect the Japanese a great deal. I also think we owe the Japanese a big apology for dropping atomic bombs on two of their cities and killing hundreds of thousands of innocent people. We also put Japanese-Americans in camps during World War 2 and that made us no better than the Nazis in my opinion and we as a country should be ashamed. Let me guess, I'm a "faggot" for thinking that.
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God Squad
True Christian™
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Posts: 9,322
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: rebuking eurotrash commies
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Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!) -
09-19-2008, 04:25 PM
You know something, maybe you should start drinking again!
Matthew:
5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
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God Squad
True Christian™
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Posts: 9,322
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: rebuking eurotrash commies
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Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!) -
09-19-2008, 04:39 PM
As far as the bombs go. This is what i say,
YEEEE HAW!!!!!!!
Matthew:
5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
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Municipal Code Archivist - Deuteronomy 28:58 Christ's Guardian
True Christian™
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Posts: 23,743
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Mostly on the front porch.
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Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!) -
09-19-2008, 05:02 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dwayne DeKalb
I respect the Japanese a great deal.
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For Pearl Harbor?
Quote:
I also think we owe the Japanese a big apology for dropping atomic bombs on two of their cities and killing hundreds of thousands of innocent people.
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They never apologized to us for not ending the war and forcing us to do it.
Quote:
We also put Japanese-Americans in camps during World War 2 and that made us no better than the Nazis in my opinion and we as a country should be ashamed. Let me guess, I'm a "faggot" for thinking that.
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You said it, not me.
May you be a blessing to every life you touch.
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One of the Lord's Airborne Rangers Salvation from Above God's Favorite Pilot™
True Christian™
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Posts: 6,282
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Flying the Friendly Skies for Jesus!
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Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!) -
09-19-2008, 06:25 PM
This thread is just too much! All this talk of ladies privates places, mushrooms, pee, fag love, and Hotshiti's facial hair are making me nauseated. True Christians™ would never go anywhere near "that" with their faces! The shame of even catching a glimpse of a Christian ladies "parts" would be almost to much to bear! The fact that people actually do those things is certainly proof positive the Devil is sending demons into and out of cooters.
The thought of anything going in and out of a cooter is simply disgusting! And I heard some sinners have teeth down there!
Winging our Way Across the World for The Lord!
God Bless John Boehner and God Bless the Grand Old Party!
Barack Hussein Obama is not My President!!!
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True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 1,024
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Where Jesus Wants Me
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Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!) -
09-19-2008, 07:17 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Aaron Portway
And I heard some sinners have teeth down there!
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Yes Brother, sadly I did see a documentary on that. The sinful victims didn't even know what they were getting into.
Gather around so that I can read to you from my book of TRUTH. Genesis thru Revelations....Pick one!
Luke 12:5- But I will forewarn you whom ye shall fear: Fear him, which after he hath killed hath power to cast into hell; yea, I say unto you, Fear him.
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