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Revelationary Equine Gnathologist for Christ
True Christian™
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Posts: 2,395
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Prodigal Son of Godless NYC.
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Attention Brother Des -
12-13-2014, 07:58 PM
Because I share the concern of many over the well-being of Sister Cookie, I am writing to implore you to utilize the technology of drones to settle the question of her safety once and for all. I have no reason whatsoever to doubt our dear Brother Faith Machine, despite his warning signature and his constant attempts to get people to have an internet chat and his constant excuses for not providing us with probative examples that the good Sister Cookie is alive and well do make it difficult at times.
Through the use of drones, you would be able to once and for all provide us with the information we are prayerfully seeking.
I pray you will grant this request, sir.
Come, Lord Jesus!
BrotherLarry
Proverbs 21:31 KJV 1611:
“The horse is prepared against the day of battell: but safetie is of the Lord.”
Lord, may I serve my equine brothers and sisters just as I do my fellow man. Amen and Amen
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True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 2,719
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: MAGA Country, USA
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Re: Attention Brother Des -
12-14-2014, 12:14 AM
This would be a good solution were the range of the drones not severely limited, as are their numbers and locations.
Perhaps though...
Just a wild thought, but does FM have any terrorist connections? If we could have him declared a terrorist, potential terrorist, possible potential terrorist supporter, or suspected possible potential terrorist supporter sympathizer I might be able to convince the NSA to throw a few billion my way, allowing for increased operations and greater surveillance potential.
Psalm 137:9 Happy shall he be, that taketh and dasheth thy little ones against the stones.
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True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 2,290
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: In Jesus' lap
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Re: Attention Brother Des -
12-14-2014, 12:30 AM
I'm fairly sure that FM once mentioned that a mooselimb lived in his street. Surely, that's sufficient to establish that he's a suspected possible potential terrorist supporter sympathizer.
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True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 2,719
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: MAGA Country, USA
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Re: Attention Brother Des -
12-14-2014, 02:24 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jim Farmer
I'm fairly sure that FM once mentioned that a mooselimb lived in his street. Surely, that's sufficient to establish that he's a suspected possible potential terrorist supporter sympathizer.
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I'll make some calls.
Psalm 137:9 Happy shall he be, that taketh and dasheth thy little ones against the stones.
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True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 991
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: 1380 Apostle's Park Ct, Freehold
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Re: Attention Brother Des -
12-14-2014, 08:30 PM
Well, Glory to God, Brother Des. Should you require extra funding, just PM me.
At last those drones will have uses other than hovering outside my lovely, well-appointed Apostles Park Court home when Pastor Ezekiel is delivering pastoral care. While I understand the need for his security, I do not at all comprehend why they hover in the window of my beaudoir. Distasteful.
If I might add something else: I would expedite the drone search if possible. While Faith Machine is a True Christian™, he can also be very resourceful in avoiding detection. I pray this puts the whole Miss Cookie thing to bed.
But God knows she's seen enough beds. I am not sure how much sleep she's had, of course. I leave that in the Lord's hands. Praise Jesus.
NRL
1 Samuel 8:13 "And he will take your daughters to be confectionaries, and to be cookes, and to be bakers." Naomi Ruth Lamb, Proprietress:
Naomi's Moist Pie - Unsaved Unwelcome!
Locations in 50 States and Canada
!Voted Best Pie in Freehold!
Once you've tasted Naomi's pie, you'll crave it again and again and again and again.
Baptist pastors always receive a 50% discount.
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True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 2,719
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: MAGA Country, USA
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Re: Attention Brother Des -
12-17-2014, 12:46 AM
The search has been long and exhausting, but I can say with some certainty that she is not at Berkeley's Stern Hall, Denver U's Centennial Hall, Montana State U's Hannon or Hapner Hall, or University of Chicago's Blackstone House.
Keep in mind that this is a pilot operation, so the drone bases are mostly located in Blue states near liberal universities that are hotbeds of Communist activity and home-grown terrorism.
Psalm 137:9 Happy shall he be, that taketh and dasheth thy little ones against the stones.
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True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 6,765
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Bethel School of Supernatural Ministry, Redding, CA
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Re: Attention Brother Des -
12-20-2014, 12:49 AM
Did we lose track of ANOTHER Landover lady? This is starting to get embarrassing.
I never did fully trust Faith Machine. His True Christianity™ was just a little too glib for my tastes. But I'm not sure we should be putting him on the Do Not Fly list just yet. As long as he's current with his tithing, I say he deserves the benefit of the doubt.
Draft Freehold, Iowa Mayor
Johny Joe Hold
for Vice President in 2024
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True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 991
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: 1380 Apostle's Park Ct, Freehold
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Re: Attention Brother Des -
12-20-2014, 07:09 PM
I am going to distribute my pie to the Iowa Congress and see if they will be moved enough by it and of course by the plight of Sister Cookie to call in the FBI and National Guard. An answer to whether or not she is alive and being held against her will is soon to be had.
I wonder if - oh, PRAISE GOD! I just had an epiphany!
KIRK CAMERON might be able to help!
1 Samuel 8:13 "And he will take your daughters to be confectionaries, and to be cookes, and to be bakers." Naomi Ruth Lamb, Proprietress:
Naomi's Moist Pie - Unsaved Unwelcome!
Locations in 50 States and Canada
!Voted Best Pie in Freehold!
Once you've tasted Naomi's pie, you'll crave it again and again and again and again.
Baptist pastors always receive a 50% discount.
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