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Didn't write the Bible, just obeys it
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BUSTED! Huge shipment of Marijuana captured by Freehold Security! -
11-05-2018, 07:28 PM
Obviously this huge shipment was intended to help Democrats in the midterm elections on Tuesday. Democrats are making efforts to legalize the demon weed in every jurisdiction, and are trying to recruit as many new potheads as possible before Tuesday.
For OpSec reasons I won't say how we found the "stash", (in fact, I'm not 100% sure OpSec allows me to inform you that potheads use "Stash" as a code-word for demon weed stockpiles). I will say that our in-depth research project is starting to pay off.
Anyway, I'm requesting backup to assist in the destruction of the stockpile. Obviously burning it is out of the question, and flushing it down toilets will likely cause clogs. Also, the thought of sewer crocodiles getting the "munchies".
Updates to come.
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True Christian™ Lady Extraordinaire, an Honorary Male Biblicist
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Location: Surrounded by heathens
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Re: BUSTED! Huge shipment of Marijuana captured by Freehold Security! -
11-05-2018, 07:55 PM
This news is simultaneously alarming and reassuring, Brother Jeb. However it was found, warmest congratulations to Bobby-Joe and his team.
I don't understand why it can't be burned, as long as it's done in a sealed and controlled environment and the smoke isn't allowed to affect local residents. This is how our local police normally dispose of it over here in England.
My eldest boy says he'd hang on to it until after Tuesday's vote, then take it up to Godless Canada (which is probably where it came from) and put the proceeds towards Pastor Zeke's aircraft fund.
Vaccinated by the love of Jesus!!!
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Didn't write the Bible, just obeys it
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Re: BUSTED! Huge shipment of Marijuana captured by Freehold Security! -
11-05-2018, 08:11 PM
Still standing guard, things are getting boring. Could someone bring me some snacks? Not a big boring meal, just some nice light snacks to give me something to do.
Also, any suggestions for music I could listen to? No dance music, I mean something deep and interesting. Maybe some good Christian pro-rock would be nice. Is Neal Morse the sort of thing that's good for this situation?
EDIT: I'm just hungry and bored, okay? So what?
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Didn't write the Bible, just obeys it
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Re: BUSTED! Huge shipment of Marijuana captured by Freehold Security! -
11-05-2018, 08:21 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Joanna Lytton-Vasey
My eldest boy says he'd hang on to it
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Niiiice try.
Edit: No, I'm not being paranoid. Why is everyone calling me paranoid behind my back?
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True Christian™ Lady Extraordinaire, an Honorary Male Biblicist
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Posts: 8,776
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Location: Surrounded by heathens
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Re: BUSTED! Huge shipment of Marijuana captured by Freehold Security! -
11-05-2018, 09:02 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jeb Stuart Thurmond
Niiiice try.
Edit: No, I'm not being paranoid. Why is everyone calling me paranoid behind my back?
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No, it's my fault for not explaining properly, like a man would have done. Young Luke was just saying what he might have done if faced with your problem - not that it is a problem, not for you, everyone understands that. Rest assured that all my boys are right here in England - it's 9 at night here, so everyone under 6 is in bed and the others are now spear-fishing in the estuary.
Have you been left to guard this "stash" on your own? Would you like me to contact Bobby-Joe to send reinforcements? I worry about you bearing all the responsibility alone, Brother Jeb, though of course you are never alone when Jesus is with you.
Vaccinated by the love of Jesus!!!
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Didn't write the Bible, just obeys it
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Re: BUSTED! Huge shipment of Marijuana captured by Freehold Security! -
11-05-2018, 09:10 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Joanna Lytton-Vasey
I worry about you bearing all the responsibility alone, Brother Jeb, though of course you are never alone when Jesus is with you.
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Well, Jesus can't cook, so I'll take all the help I can get.
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True Christian™ Lady Extraordinaire, an Honorary Male Biblicist
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Re: BUSTED! Huge shipment of Marijuana captured by Freehold Security! -
11-05-2018, 09:22 PM
Brother, Bobby-Joe says he can't send back-up unless you tell him exactly where you are. The same goes for the delivery of snacks.
I feel very helpless here, over 4,000 miles away (that's assuming you're in Freehold). But my prayers are with you.
Vaccinated by the love of Jesus!!!
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Didn't write the Bible, just obeys it
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Re: BUSTED! Huge shipment of Marijuana captured by Freehold Security! -
11-05-2018, 10:58 PM
I just thought what if just beeing this near so much weed is giving me a phycosomatic high and thats so funny my ribs hurt.
Edit: I can't belives stoners listen to garbage like this, lol
LOL
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Didn't write the Bible, just obeys it
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Re: BUSTED! Huge shipment of Marijuana captured by Freehold Security! -
11-05-2018, 11:08 PM
So I had a really funny idea, what if I use my sher willpower to pretend to be high? Then I could thnikinglike a stoner, and understand is alf the battle. Know your enemy.
All this writing is distracting me though.
EDIT: omg i've invented the perfect workout. Basically, you laugh at everything. It's a good workout.
I'm going to call my workout club LOL, standing for League Of Laughers.
If I write LOL a lot in the near future, I'm just branding and google stuff.
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Didn't write the Bible, just obeys it
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Re: BUSTED! Huge shipment of Marijuana captured by Freehold Security! -
11-05-2018, 11:24 PM
It's so funny that Stoners think this is funny, lol:
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Re: BUSTED! Huge shipment of Marijuana captured by Freehold Security! -
11-05-2018, 11:40 PM
I have no doubt that Landover's police force will inspect the crate to see if it had been tampered with before they dispose of it. Have the authorities been alerted yet Mister Jeb? I could tell my Pa and have him check in for you. How will it actually be disposed of? I mean no disrespect but your report seems a little vague although I am not a True Christian™ and am only a 17 year old with a lady's intellect.
My name is Maxine Levantine. I am 17 and follow the KJV Bible to a T. If you are wanting to hit on me you can turn away. THIS is reserved for Jesus and my future husband (whoever that may be).
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Didn't write the Bible, just obeys it
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Re: BUSTED! Huge shipment of Marijuana captured by Freehold Security! -
11-05-2018, 11:46 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by BibleReader2231
I have no doubt that Landover's police force will inspect the crate to see if it had been tampered with before they dispose of it. Have the authorities been alerted yet Mister Jeb? I could tell my Pa and have him check in for you. How will it actually be disposed of? I mean no disrespect but your report seems a little vague although I am not a True Christian™ and am only a 17 year old with a lady's intellect.
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That's nice and humble of you but I'm trying to learn about Polar Bears. That's what the above video is about, right?
EDIT: Who said it was in a crate? :hmm:
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Re: BUSTED! Huge shipment of Marijuana captured by Freehold Security! -
11-05-2018, 11:54 PM
Trump's Wall is going to have a sense of humor, it's good to have a wall that laughs:
"Ha Ha Ha HA!" - Mr. Wall.
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Re: BUSTED! Huge shipment of Marijuana captured by Freehold Security! -
11-05-2018, 11:55 PM
Sorry, I was assuming it was a crate. Had this picture in my mind. I guess I'm wrong. Also I thought this topic was about Landover's authorities getting rid of contraband and you were standing guard. Again I must be wrong. I'm just a female lol so my intuition isn't always right. I would send you some food since you said you were hungry but I'm not allowed in Freehold's gated community. So what did you want to know about polar bears?
My name is Maxine Levantine. I am 17 and follow the KJV Bible to a T. If you are wanting to hit on me you can turn away. THIS is reserved for Jesus and my future husband (whoever that may be).
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Didn't write the Bible, just obeys it
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Re: BUSTED! Huge shipment of Marijuana captured by Freehold Security! -
11-06-2018, 12:10 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by BibleReader2231
So what did you want to know about polar bears?
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Until you can turn into brightly colored ribbons that transform into purple polar bears...Wait, there's no polar bears, right? Right?
Oh I got it potheads aren't crazy, they just pretend to be crazy because crazy is funny.
Edit: It's about Polar Bears because the polar bears are conspicuous in their absence.
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Re: BUSTED! Huge shipment of Marijuana captured by Freehold Security! -
11-06-2018, 12:16 AM
I hate to say this but I am lost. It's probably not your fault Mister Jeb but I can't make sense of what we should talk about. Let me go ask Pastor Ezekiel and my Pa then I'll be back knowing what we're talking about whether it be shipments or purple polar bears. Hang tight and keep doing God's work guarding that contraband!
My name is Maxine Levantine. I am 17 and follow the KJV Bible to a T. If you are wanting to hit on me you can turn away. THIS is reserved for Jesus and my future husband (whoever that may be).
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Re: BUSTED! Huge shipment of Marijuana captured by Freehold Security! -
11-06-2018, 12:47 AM
I remember reading somewhere that the pot can affect you even if you don't smoke it. You just have to be near it. I hope you'll survive this! Even being around the pot is enough to kill a grown man!
Judge in yourselves: is it comely that a woman pray unto God uncovered?
1 Corinthians 11:13
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Didn't write the Bible, just obeys it
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Posts: 6,639
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Re: BUSTED! Huge shipment of Marijuana captured by Freehold Security! -
11-06-2018, 12:52 AM
There's no direct line of sight, so it can't possibly be affecting me.
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